Do you think it's tacky for teens to ask for money for Christmas?

[MELSMICE]

I'm not sure what others think of this, but I think it's tacky that my niece
(13) & nephew (15) have asked for money for Christmas. In fact, my SIL sent their lists via e-mail with "money" on them.

Sorry, I will not give them money for Christmas. DH (these are his brothers kids) told me I should respond with, "We will not be giving the kids money, we need other ideas".

Am I in the minority, or is this tacky for ask for as a Christmas gift?

 

[Laugh O. Grams]

Yeah...asking for cash is pretty tacky.

That being said, we send all of our nieces and nephews money for Xmas, only because it's easy for us and one size definitely fits all...

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I think it is tacky to send "lists".

 

[chrisw127]

I don't think you're in the minority. A little spending money is nice for kids, but giving someone a gift card or cash is kind of depressing. Of course, the exception is if they really need the money, but I'm guessing that these teens are doing just fine.

I like your planned response--asking for other ideas. I'll keep that in mind as my neices and nephews grow up.

 

[Serena]

Every teenager I know would rather receive money than anything else. If the thought is to give them something they want, why not?
Just send them the same that you were thinking of spending.

 

[4greatboys]

I do think it's tacky to send a list saying you want money. However if you ask someone for a list and that's what they put on there I don't think it's tacky.

My SIL asks me if my older boys prefer money. I tell her yes. She is relieved she doesn't have to go shopping for them since she has a hard time shopping for them. Same with my niece. If she would prefer money then I would rather give her something she needs/wants as opposed to something she will never use.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I do think it's tacky to send a list saying you want money. However if you ask someone for a list and that's what they put on there I don't think it's tacky.

If you are asking for a list from the family member, then I do not find it tacky.

Esp now...heck we all need cash.

 

[lulugirl]

I think it is tacky to send "lists".

I agree, especially when that list reads "money"
That said, I would just send them a check and be done w/ it.....easy for me to say I hate to shop.

 

[tegdig]

I don't think it is tacky to give teenagers money for gifts for Christmas or anything else, but I find it offensive when asked for it.....I found it really offensive when invited to a couple of wedding showers this past year and rather than registering for gifts or given decorating colors of their rooms,etc, for buying appropriate gifts...it said cash would be appreciated!!!!!!! Kind of felt like, if you can't afford the wedding, etc.....don't plan such a big one!!! I don't need to pay for it! Back to teenagers and Christmas....we had a Christmas a few years ago and a large group of the neices and nephews were teens, We gave them all gift cards for gas.....wow! was I the favorite aunt that year!

 

[mamamia2]

I don't think its tacky, but that being said, I don't like to give my nieces and nephews money for Christmas. I have been giving them money for their birthdays for a few years now. But at Christmas, I want them to have a package to open.

On the other hand, I can see why they would want money. They probably want some video games or other expensive items. I think it would be tacky if they actually asked people (other than their parents or close relative) for the expensive items. If they got money from people they could put it all together and buy what they want.

My nieces and nephew range in age from 5 to 19 and we spend about $15-$20 per child on Christmas gifts (I spend $25 on birthday gifts). Its getting harder and harder to find things in that price range, so i have a feeling that I will be giving them money for Christmas in a another year or two. I also think that a gift is something you have picked out with that person in mind - it may not be on their list, but thats okay. I feel the list is a guideline. I can either get whats on their list or if I'm not comfortable with any of it, I can get them something I think they will like. For my nephews who are 17 and 19 I got them both a Jeff Dunham DVD for $7 each on amazon and I will attach a $10 bill to it. I don't know if they even like Jeff Dunham or know who he is, but we love him. My kids and I think he is really funny.

My children are 18 (as of tomorrow), 15 and 13. I just asked them to make up their Christmas list. They have expensive things like an Xbox 360 on there and they also have some smaller items. But, when my BIL calls for their list, I will only tell them about the things under $20.

 

[maslex]

The only way I would think of it as being tacky is.....if they came right up to you and told you to give them money for Christmas/birthday/whatever, without you even asking what they would like.

I have nephews and a niece and some of my friends kids that I buy for (10 kids total) They range from 5-13. I always ask my brother/sister/friend for ideas on what the kids like (I also get ideas from the kids themselves) Usually the younger ones will tell me which toys they like.

But I think once the kids start getting older it's so much harder to shop for (not to mention so much more expensive) So if they are trying to save for a big ticket item and would like cash to go towards that, then I have no problem with putting cash into a card for them. I would rather hear them tell me they want cash rather than telling me that they want a WII system, ya know? LOL

 

[hemispheredancer]

My daughter (13) is one of those teenagers that wants money for Christmas. She is saving her money to buy a laptop and is pooling her birthday money (12/6) and Christmas money to put toward this big ticket item. I don't think it's tacky at all to requeset money...but only when you are asked. She won't bluntly come out and say "don't buy me gifts, just give me cash" to anybody!

 

[NMAmy]

Sorry, I will not give them money for Christmas. DH (these are his brothers kids) told me I should respond with, "We will not be giving the kids money, we need other ideas".

I'm not sure I'd send that sentence in an email. It sounds kind of rude right back. You don't want to give money but want their mother to send other suggestions? Sometimes it's even hard for their mom to come up with gift ideas for teens.

I don't think it's tacky with teens for a family member to say, "Hey, they'd like money" if someone inquires. I have no problem finding stuff for teen girls but teen boys are a mystery to me since I don't have any. Teens are very difficult to buy for and usually pretty picky.

In previous years, dd has asked for money from me for Christmas because she wants clothes. Besides the fact that I have no taste it's hard to find items that fit her. When I gave her cash as her main Christmas gift, we'd go shop the sales after the holidays and she'd get a lot of bang for her buck. I did dutifully send a list of inexpensive items to family members who asked, though it was a pain.

 

[Stitchfans]

I don't think it is tacky to give teenagers money for gifts for Christmas or anything else, but I find it offensive when asked for it....

I agree. Although when you do not know the teenager that well or know what to get them a gift card to some store is an excellent idea. I always end up getting one of those for DH's nieces and nephew. May have to for my brother's kids in the future too.

 

[Kim&Chris]

I don't think it's tacky. They are just being honest.

I have teenage nieces and nephews, and I know that if I tried to pick out clothing that they liked, I'd drive myself crazy. Teenagers have different taste than I do, so if I can hand them a gift card or cash & they can go pick out something they'll love, then I'm FINE with that!!

 

[mominwestlake]

I use to not like it when my nieces and nephews wanted cash for Christmas. I also wanted them to have a gift to open. Now however I am the one with 2teens and guess what they would like for Christmas? Money. They would never tell anyone that. Their standard response if someone asks them what they would like is that they would like anything. But if I am asked what the kids would like- money. They are usually saving up for something and I will explain that to my mother, sister, etc.

 

[*pixie*dust*]

If the list was asked for I dont think it is tacky at all. Most teens want to buy there own stuff. Mt neice and nephew are also 13 & 15. I know they enjoy buying there own stuff and frankly it is a lot less stressful for me to send money than search the mall for something the "might" like.

I do not agree with sending an unrequested list though. That is over stepping. If you didnt ask for the list -- how do they know you were getting them anything? I wouldn't fault the kids though-- the mom is the one that sent the list.

 

[Camicar]

I think it's tacky to say up front, but I have no problems with saying that dd would prefer a gift card to xyz stores when asked. To be honest, I sometimes end up giving her a gift card myself. It is more fun to shop, but it's no fun to give someone something they don't want/like/need.

It's also no fun to do the post-Christmas returns, especially because as I've learned from bitter experience with stores like Toys R Us, when you go to return it with a receipt, they will only give you the post-Christmas sale price on that item. Once my mother bought dd a $40 item at TRU and it was too small so we went to return it; we had the receipt, but it was marked down in clearance and they would only give us $5 back. What a waste for everyone.

At this point, dd is saving up for a laptop, so to be honest, the money would be MOST appreciated. She'll be gracious and write a thank you note for whatever is given to her, but if you actually want to give her a gift she wants/needs, then a gift card or money is your best bet.

 

[ckay87]

I'm really interested in this because I have teenagers.

Here's my thing....did you (OP) ask what the neice and nephew want? If you asked and you got an honest answer, it's not rude of them at all. If you want to do a meaningful gift that comes from your heart, that is based on what you know and love about these kids, that is your own idea....then don't ask. If you want to be told what to give them and you receive an honest answer, then be grateful. Now, if you had some nice gift ideas in mind and you got a notice that the kids only want money, I'd be a little put out too.

I'm the only one in the whole family who has teenagers, so of course people don't know what to get them. I always dread the phone calls when everyone asks what to get them. I feel so funny either (A) giving them an actual item off the kids' list (all of which are pretty pricey) or (B) being honest and saying that they'd prefer to receive money or gift cards from relatives. I never know how to handle it.

I know that MY kids are never handed money by US. We don't buy them much at all outside of birthdays and holidays. They don't even get an allowance (yea, yea, bad mom, bad mom). So they LOOOVE to get money for Christmas. Don't just assume that these teens are "doing just fine." Their parents may have all the money in the world....doesn't mean they're handing any of it over to the kids!

When I start hearing from grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. with this question, I was prepared to give them ideas like X-Box Live membership renewal, movie theater gift cards, McDonalds gift cards, etc., because in all honesty, my kids would LOVE that so much more than stuff. Is that rude?

 

[mlynn]

I'm not sure what others think of this, but I think it's tacky that my niece
(13) & nephew (15) have asked for money for Christmas. In fact, my SIL sent their lists via e-mail with "money" on them.

Sorry, I will not give them money for Christmas. DH (these are his brothers kids) told me I should respond with, "We will not be giving the kids money, we need other ideas".

Am I in the minority, or is this tacky for ask for as a Christmas gift?

Yes sending out a list with money on it is tacky.
I do give my nieces money because every year since becoming teenagers they take what ever I buy back. So I give money now.They don't ask for it but it is what I give.