Do you ever wonder...

[Dax]

Do you ever wonder why things happen the way they do? How one week all can be fine, then another, its not? For the past few weeks things had been good. I had a vacation, celebrated my one year anniversry, got to see my father in law and just everything seemed to be going good. Then Monday night, it was all over. My DH and I argied about something really stupid. Due to my work schedule, I have not seen him. I have spoken to him on the phone for about 10 mins total. He is looking for another place to live at this point. Now keep in mind this isnt because of just this fight. We have been having some issues off and on for a while.

Now the question I have is this a good thing? Do we need some time apart? Will it help? I love him to death, and sometimes I wonder if it is the same for him. Maybe some time apart will be good. I dont know anymore...I am starting to get really depressed, which of course makes me wanna eat...and I am trying to get back into the diet mode again and this is not helping.

I am sorry to bring everyone down at this point. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest..

 

[preshi]

I rencently took 6 months off from Dh. I realize it hurt alot of people but it was something I needed to do... now that we are back together I realize how much I love him and how much I missed him. So sometimes it's a healthy thing... if you ever need to talk please feel free to PM me

{{{hugs}}}

 

[gallaj0]

It's good to talk things out, especially with people outside the relationship. See if there is someone that can listen to both sides; a family therapist, counsler, or a minister that can help. they have the training to help identify problems, and once they have been clearly identified, they can be fixed; even if that involves time apart.
Try not to let things get you down; things won't always be so bad.

 

[Beauty]

I'm going to say the opposite....Not trying to make your decision and definatly not putting down anyone elses decision especially if it worked but in my 13 years of marriage never ever did one of us leave.

Things are wonderful now but they HAVE NOT always been that way. There was a point where I thought we wouldn't make it another month but we didn't leave. We stayed together and fought it out....and believe me we argued and talked and cried and laughed. But in my opinion (for whatever its worth) leaving is never ever the answer!

We have never slept apart and we have never gone to bed angry at each other.

I say if you love him don't leave fight for your marriage!

 

[Rajah]

Yep, I do wonder why things can be going so great and then WHAM. I'm sorry you're having problems.

 

[Dax]

Thanks for the support. I am at the point where I feel I am getting no support from anyone. I dont have a lot of friends, I work with men, so I just feel alone on this. I dont even have a mother to go to, as I am not on speaking terms with her.

I am really hating life right now..

 

[Beauty]

Oh Dax I'm so sorry! If you need to talk email me,

princessjasmine@cox-internet.com I don't know how much help I can be but I will be glad to be your friend and listen.

 

[Kteacher]

sorry Dax

 

[LadyAurora]

Dax-
Don't feel alone, all of us have been there. 2002 was a bad year for DH and me. Every time we thought things couldn't get worse, something even more horrible happened. Examples:both lost jobs, new job pays less than half for me, Nana's death, etc. I was so stressed out I didn't think I could take it anymore and thought about leaving my DH! But we made it, moved across the country to FL, and have started a new life. I try to think of it as leaving my problems back there. Things are starting to look better now, although I am still superstitious about saying things are great. Maybe because we live in the same state as WDW, but I am in a good mood and love DH even more!
So I guess my point is, keep your chin up, things will get batter eventually!

 

[Lynn CC]

A Big {HUG} for you. I like to eat when I'm worried about something too, but I find if I keep really busy...really busy like cleaning things I never thought I'd get to and such. I'm too busy to eat then exhausted afterwards too.
I hope things get better for you soon

 

[Michelle]

Wow, Dax, I'm sorry to hear this. You just celebrated your one-year anniversary and are having major problems? It sounds like you two need may want to consider some outside help. At one year the honeymoon should definitely not be over. I really hope you are able to work it out together.

{{{HUGS}}} and keep us posted!

 

[laceemouse]

I just have to say the entire first year of marriage was difficult for me. I had a lot of "what if's" and such. It was just a big adjustment as we were both a little older and had been single and living our own lives. Things got better for us with time. Now it is 15 years and 4 kids later and I can not imagine life without DH!!! Hope it all works out for you...Lacee

 

[Helopoh]

I know exactly what you are going through ((((HUGS)))) I PM'D you!!

 

[Serena]

I wish I could give you some advice, but I don't have a clue what to say. Marriage is hard and to be fighting and looking to leave already is not a good sign. It could just be temper, some people can blow up and say all kinds of things and when they cool down things are fine again.
I would get ahold of a counselor, someone you can talk to face to face about things. See if your husband will go with you, but don't count on it. Go just for you. I wish I did a year ago.

 

[Buckalew]

Dax,
I am so sorry you are having such a bad time right now. The first 3 years of my marriage were so rough. I have few good memories of those early years of marriage (how sad). I remember coming home from work one night being brave and ready to say "It's Over, I'm outta here." We sat down and talked it out and I made a decision to give it everything I had instead of feeling like any day now I could just walk out. That was the point at which my marriage changed. August will be 16 years and though my marriage isn't perfect, it is a pretty good one.

I wish I could say DH and I never go to bed mad but that wouldn't be the truth. Marriage can be tough. I hope you all can work it out. As you can see, a lot of people have been in a boat like yours.
I wish you all the best in your decisions.