Dena's **All My Reasons Why**Journal (Please Join Me!)

[RunningLilo]

All My Reasons Why...I will continue my quest towards a healthier me! ​

Hello Everyone! Welcome!

Thanks for stopping by. There are so many reasons I want to get healthy and this journal is my little place to document them. Feel free to share yours. They'll definitely be an inspiration.

Top 5 Reasons

1. I want to grow old with my dh. I want us to be active and fully enjoy our years together.

2. I want to be able to play with my dd. Not just play, but really get out there and have fun with her. I don't want to be a sideline mom anymore. Especially, with anything that involves a swimsuit.

3. I have just GOT to be Belle for Halloween, and I want to be believeable.

4. I want to go to my 10-year high school reunion a Disney 1/2 marathon finisher.

5. I don't ever want to go back to being a slave to sugar. Always eating, but never feeling full.

Okay, here's me:
I'm a 25yo SAHM. I live in on the east coast of Florida. Jealous? Ha ha! I've been married to the best guy in the whole world since June 29, 2002. And we were blessed with a super sweet dd April 29, 2004. TERRIBLE TWO's here we come! Did I mention that I could possibly be the world's leading expert on Sesame Street? But really I'm just bumbling along through life trying to figure out God's will for me. The only thing I've found to be my calling so far is to teach the kindergarten Missionettes Daisies class at my church. I just adore those little girls!!! I'm hoping to get involved with a girl's running club soon. I want to help them learn how important it is to take care of your health. Basically, I guess I don't want them to end up where I did at 237lbs. It's been a loooong hard road back...physically and mentally. DH and I run at night because I just don't know if I could handle someone ridiculing me for running while being so overweight. But I am committed to doing this the hard way...Diet & Exercise only. No surgery. No pills. To me it's the effort of the journey that makes the goal so rewarding.

For Pics of me click here!

 

[AmyBeth68]

Hi Dena!

I love your journal already! You are awesome girl, keep up the great work! I will be cheering you on from the sidelines of 1/2 marathon next January , as I nervously await the full.

Thanks for sharing your journey!

 

[RunningLilo]

Hey Amy!
Thanks for reading my journal. But I'm warning you, it probably will get all kinds of emotional in here. I just hope my experiences and thoughts can help someone else as we are all going through this process together!

Reason #6
I will prove to my pretty, skinny aunts that I can do something athletic.

I've always been the non-athletic and dare I say, the ugliest one of my mother's side of the family. I was often teased for being the "bookworm." It felt horrible when my aunt would force me to play softball with her family and then criticize me when I wasn't as good as her kids. Arrgh! This is stupid stuff that I should so be over by now. It's only been what, 15 years ago?!? But I've identified her voice as one of those in my head that reinforces that I can't do this. I'm sure when my 1/2 marathon is over and I finally can prove I have accomplished something athletic that she and her kids will still put some negative spin on my accomplishment. I can totally see them saying that they could have done it faster or that it only counts if you run the whole way. Lord, please help me get past these negative people and voices that continually try to hold me back. This is why I love being a part of the WISHers. You all have taught me to believe in myself again no matter what those in my life may say.

 

[RunningLilo]

Reason #7
7. I now love doing yard work.

I hated suffering what John Bingham has coined as "sedentary confinement." At 237lbs it took so much effort to do anything physical, and I was eating so poorly that I had no energy. It was just easier to do as little as possible. Growing up my Grannie always wanted me to help in her garden, and I hated it! It was so much work. I could not understand why she actually liked it. But now that I've lost some of the weight and no longer let my blood sugar rise and crash, I'm now starting to understand. My body and mind have started to crave movement. We are clearing some land and pulling vines out of trees is sooo theraputic for me. I love feeling my body work the way God designed it to.

I made a few committments official today:

I signed dh and I up for the Gate River Run 5k on March 11th here in Jax. I'm kinda disappointed that we can't do the 15k yet (especially since they get a medal), but I'm trying not to think about it. We will get there one day. I'm just glad to be participating at all. DD2 will be participating in the Diaper Dashes. We bought her the cutest pair of Nikes tonight! They look just like my pair that I recently retired. I love watching her run in them. She looks so free and happy.

I also decided to follow Hal Higdon's Novice 10K Training Program today. The 8-week schedule will have us prepared to do a 10K on April 22nd. So guess what I did?!?! I searched until I found a 10K on that exact day. Good news: It sounds like a cute one. It's called the Cheerios Challenge! Thought dd would get a kick out of it since she's a Cheerio addict. Bad News: It is near Atlanta about 5 hours away. But if that's what it takes, we'll go!

 

[AmyBeth68]

Congrats on making your commitments official . Please let me know how you like Hal Higdon's training plan. I am currently torn between 4 different training plans...Galloway, Bingham, Whitsett/Dolgener and Higdon. I haven't quite figured out how I'm going to train for the marathons. I am currently using Galloway for my 5K training.

And speaking of the 5K.....I will be racing with you guys in spirit on April 22nd. While you guys are doing your 10K I'll be doing my first ever 5K. I think that is super cool , since I am racing alone at least I'll know that there's another Wisher out there racing!

 

[RunningLilo]

Reason #8
8. It makes me not so gloomy and grumpy.

As of today it has been a whole freakin' week since I've ran, walked, or xt. I am just so down- gloomy and grumpy. I'm feeling anxious about every little thing.

I went to the Athlete's Choice gym today to check it out. (A small victory! ) They all sang the praises of their trainer Melissa. She just happened to walk in the door as I was about to leave. She took me into her office and we sat down and I explained to her that my goal was the Disney 1/2 '07. She took me on a tour of the place. She was very excited about getting girls into the free weights area, which was kind of cool since it seems so forbidden.

There were 2 negatives though:

1. The price! OMG!!! Membership is $743 for 1 year for dh and myself. 10 Sessions of personal training for me was an additional $267.00 with monthly tune-ups for $26.70 a pop. But she said we could have a family "deal" for dh's 5 training sessions for only $133.00. Gee, thanks!

2. She didn't seem to know squat about running. The only thing she knew was that her daughter was a runner. I asked if she would be able to explain tempo runs, speedwork, intervals, etc. to me and her face went blank. Duh, shouldn't your trainer know more than you?!?! She definitely seemed like the kind of trainer who only knows her gym, their machines, and that's it. It so frustrated me that this was their expert in running. Argh!

I don't think my request is too difficult. I just want someone to show me how to stretch and do strength exercises for runners. I don't want any bulk, I just want a strong core and flexability to prevent injury. I came home and searched online for personal trainers in my area and to my surprise I can't find any private ones. I guess they are all attached to a gym.

My ideal situation would be to find a personal trainer who could teach me how to do this stuff at home. It would be cheaper and Lord knows I'm not going to pay for a gym membership for the rest of my life. I'd have to mortgage the house. I really want my plan to be do-able for life.

Anyone have an idea of where to find a running personal trainer???

 

[AmyBeth68]

Hey Dena,

First of all HUGS to you . Hang in there girl, don't get down on yourself for one bad week. You have been doing great and you have wonderful goals! Start each day fresh and don't look back...otherwise you'll torture yourself. YOU ARE on the right track!!! You really are...just don't beat yourself up!!!

About the gym. Yikes. That's a lot of money for a trainer that is clueless about running. Follow your gut instincts on this one. I'm concerned that a certified "trainer" doesn't have a clue about prepping for a run. That is worrying to me. Here is what I would do....the running community is such a great friendly community. Usually they are very helpful with newbies from what I've been told. I'd search instead for running club in your area and see if one of the experienced runners can take you guys under their wings! Maybe try a google search, or search through CoolRunning.com, FLeetfeet.com, roadrunners.com etc to see if you can find a club nearby.

The other thing I would not hesitate to do, especially when you are at the point that you want to do speed training, tempo runs and intervals is ask over on the walk/run thread. Some of those people, actually many of those people, really are experts and have multiple races under their belts. I know that if you ask the question you'll get tons of in-depth replies.

Finally, you can get personalized e-coaching by the highly respected and very knowledgeable Jeff Galloway. Here's a link to his site. It's not cheap but it is WAY cheaper than the gym deal:

http://www.jeffgalloway.com/training_groups/individual.html

I would definitely check him out first and see what you think. I find his training plans to be very well laid out. He gives you loads of advice. And most importantly, he really trains you to stay injury and pain free. To me that's a huge bonus b/c running can be hard on the muscles and joints! I would look that over with your DH and see if you guys might benefit from an online coach....I would do it if I had the extra $$$ myself.

Good luck and let me know what you decide to do!

 

[LilMamiBella]

Hi Dena!
That gym and trainer is actually pretty cheap compared to the gym I go to! My trainer charges $55 for a one hour session or $300 for 6 sessions. I think its great you're doing the race. I signed up for a 5k race that will be held in two weeks. I haven't done anything really to prepare for it. But, I know I can walk for an hour and I've heard from other ladies that I'll do okay. Who knows..I may not be able to make it. Are you going to do any strength training?

 

[RunningLilo]

Amy,
Thanks so much for the encouragement. It's nice to know that there's someone to help when I'm so down. You are the best! I told dh about your kickboxing class with the puddle of sweat. He thought that was crazy! I said yeah, I would have kicked the instructor in the head and left!

Stephanie,
Hi! I'm so glad you posted on my journal! Keep me up to date about your first 5k. You can definitely do it! I was soooo nervous about my first one, but it turns out there is NO reason to be. Just go out there and do your thing. No one will remember (or care) where you finish. I was last in my age group and didn't care a single bit. Just enjoy the experience. It will make you a much more confident runner once you have it under your belt. Are you planning on doing the Disney 1/2?

Reason #9
9. Running makes me feel like Dena- not just Kayla's Mommy or Adam's Wife

After I had dd I went through an identity crisis. I felt like I completely lost myself. I didn't have time to do anything for me anymore. Every minute was spent taking care of the baby, my husband, or the house. Since then, I have fallen in love with running. And every time I run it is a mini-celebration of me. It feels so great to do something just because I want to do it. Not because someone else is making me or because I am expected to. I love reading about other moms who take time out of the day for themselves and don't feel a single bit guilty about it. I mean, sheesh, we work hard and we deserve it!

Gym Search Update:
I sent dh to our college gym. He's still in school, but I graduated in '02. I figured the personal trainers there would really know their stuff since they are still in school and are probably doing it for a class grade. Come to find out both dh and I can use the gym for FREE and training is only $66 each for 3 sessions!! Not bad!!! They sent him home with a questionaire about what specific goals we were after and it says they will tailor a plan specifically for us. Dude, jackpot!!! The only negative is that it is 45 minutes away. So I'll probably ask them to show us a lot of stuff we can do at home. Since I'm only wanting BASIC strength and stretching it should be perfect. Now I've just gotta get up the nerve to walk in there with all the sorority chicks and frat guys. But you know...frat guys...hmm, there may be an upside to this...

 

[LilMamiBella]

Stephanie,
Hi! I'm so glad you posted on my journal! Keep me up to date about your first 5k. You can definitely do it! I was soooo nervous about my first one, but it turns out there is NO reason to be. Just go out there and do your thing. No one will remember (or care) where you finish. I was last in my age group and didn't care a single bit. Just enjoy the experience. It will make you a much more confident runner once you have it under your belt. Are you planning on doing the Disney 1/2?

I'm going to try not to be too hard on myself and just finish it. I'd love to do the Disney 1/2! We probably won't be able to do it this year. But, maybe if the total cost isn't too high maybe I'll be able to go. I think I'd even do the family race.

Reason #9
9. Running makes me feel like Dena- not just Kayla's Mommy or Adam's Wife

After I had dd I went through an identity crisis. I felt like I completely lost myself. I didn't have time to do anything for me anymore. Every minute was spent taking care of the baby, my husband, or the house. Since then, I have fallen in love with running. And every time I run it is a mini-celebration of me. It feels so great to do something just because I want to do it. Not because someone else is making me or because I am expected to. I love reading about other moms who take time out of the day for themselves and don't feel a single bit guilty about it. I mean, sheesh, we work hard and we deserve it!

I totally know what you mean. I hate being in the house. I love to go to different places. My daughter and I usually go in the early morning and work out and then once I'm finished I feel like I'm ready to take on anything!


Gym Search Update:
I sent dh to our college gym. He's still in school, but I graduated in '02. I figured the personal trainers there would really know their stuff since they are still in school and are probably doing it for a class grade. Come to find out both dh and I can use the gym for FREE and training is only $66 each for 3 sessions!! Not bad!!! They sent him home with a questionaire about what specific goals we were after and it says they will tailor a plan specifically for us. Dude, jackpot!!! The only negative is that it is 45 minutes away. So I'll probably ask them to show us a lot of stuff we can do at home. Since I'm only wanting BASIC strength and stretching it should be perfect. Now I've just gotta get up the nerve to walk in there with all the sorority chicks and frat guys. But you know...frat guys...hmm, there may be an upside to this... [/QUOTE]


The price sounds really good! Another thing you could do is exercise videos! I'm not really good at doing anything at home. I have to be around other people to work out. But, I'm trying to change that. I just bought some turbo jam videos and can't wait to start doing those 2-3 times a week.

 

[AmyBeth68]

DENA! I was laughing when you said you'd kick the instructor and walk out LOL! BELIEVE me....I've entertained those thoughts!!!

I really think the university gym sounds perfect! I guarantee they will give you a wonderful training plan and be sooo excited to have the opportunity! As you said, if it's for a grade they will certainly research and work hard on putting something reasonable together for you two! I'm so happy you found out about this gym....I wasn't thrilled that the other trainer was clueless about running! Now it sounds like you guys are in the right hands. And hey....cute frat guys .

I love what you said about running makes you feel like Dena! I know exactly what you mean . And having goals that are about and for us are so important. It's very easy to get lost in the lives of everyone else....I know that is what being a mother and wife means....but we do need to retain a piece of ourselves and this is truly a wonderful way to do it!!! You go girl!!!

 

[ScoJo15]

Dena....thanks for the post in my journal.

You really sound like you have your act together. Your reasoning is very thought out and makes sense!! Nice to have set goals already, for me that was a key part. If I just said "lose weight", I think I'd be less motivated than saying "complete the 10k on XX/XX date."

Way to go!!

 

[RunningLilo]

Reason #10
10. I can't wait to see dd Kayla holding a "Go Mommy!" sign at the Disney 1/2!

The Jacksonville Gate River Run 15k/5k was today. Adam and I did the 5k and Kayla did the diaper dash. I set a PR at 39:51! I broke 40 minutes! That was secretly my goal since this was our last 5k before attempting a 10k coming in April. Kayla didn't do so well. She was all set, complete with new nike running shoes and a new pink supergirl jogging suit. We've been practicing Ready, Set, Go! with her all week. But she saw 2 little girls run into each other in the heat before her's and got scared. So it was more of a Ready, Set, Stand There And Cry Your Heart Out! But for at least trying she got to go jump in the bouncy house and get a doggie balloon hat from the clown. That more than made up for her traumatic experience.

My race report is really short because I don't remember much of it. I'm right in the middle of a cold (again) and was just focused on putting one foot in front of the other without dying. Here's what I remember: I picked out the person I wanted to beat at the beginning of the race and actually beat her! Our run/walk intervals worked out perfectly with the hills. Just by chance we got to walk up almost all of them. I got a freaking huge stitch in my side around the 2 mile mark. It was excruciating but I kept going. And I remember we ran by a place that smelled really gross. And since I breathe through my mouth it was like tasting it. Ick! Ick! Ick! Then at the end when it was time to do a walk interval I told dh that I wanted to run all the way to the end. He was so supportive and encouraging that I ran 4 min 20 sec without stopping! He's so great! And that's all I can remember of this race.

At the expo there was a fitness training group called Definition. I talked to the guy and he said all the little key words that I was wanting to hear from a trainer. I'm really looking forward to trying their free consultation and seeing their place. It's not located in an official gym so we don't have to pay for a gym membership! He said they can teach us stuff to do at home and then we can go in for weekly check-ups with them. Sounds promising. I'm ready to give the thinking part of my training over to someone else and just focus on actually doing it.

My favorite part of the day was watching the end of the 15k. I get seriously teary eyed seeing all the little kids cheering for their Mommies. I can't even imagine when Kayla gets older and is proud of me. That's the whole reason I'm doing this.

 

[AmyBeth68]

YAY DENA!!!!!!!

I'm so incredibly happy for you!! Sounds like you did an awesome job at the race!!! And I love the sound of that training group! That would be amazing to have help planning your marathon training. Kayla is going to be so proud of her mommy!!! I know what you mean too....the idea of seeing my kids cheer me on and the look on their faces when we all finish the marathons in Disney will be truly priceless! And don't worry girl...I'm going to be there cheering you on in the Half Marathon! I can't wait...it's so cool to share this journey with my on-line friends!!!

 

[RunningLilo]

Reason #11
11. Runners have the sexiest calves.

Warning- this is totally goofy, but one of my favorite parts of racing is checking out all the guy runners' calf muscles. I absolutely can't stand it when guys bulk up their upper body but have the skinniest little legs. DH is getting great calf muscles since we started running. He is so going to hate me for writing this!

We were supposed to do our first 4 mile run last night, but my hip joint was hurting. It has some weird pains sometimes since giving birth to dd. So I decided it was better to rest it instead of risking injury. Also, I wasn't in the right mindset to take that next step. I was feeling rebellious again. So hopefully tonight when we get back from church I will be ready. That makes the 2nd run I missed last week. I'm starting to feel really guilty over not completing these training runs. I think I go through cycles where I'm extremely motivated for about 3 weeks and then I want to take a complete week off. Not the best thing if you are trying to build endurance, huh?

Weightloss update: Currently I've lost 49lbs. I am SO CLOSE to making it to 50! It's been going up and down for about a week now. I am going to be so excited when it finally happens. But I am celebrating weighing 188. This is the first time I've been in the 180s without taking any pills or extreme diets. I'm happy about that, but I freaking want to hit the BIG 50 so I can reward myself with some new clothes! My current ones are so baggy that a man thought I was pregnant the other day. I took it as a compliment!

 

[kimwim8]

Hi Dena! I just read your journal!! Congrats on the races you've completed already! You are such an inspiration!

You've inspired me to look into 5K races around me to set a goal for myself. Since it's been cold, I've been strictly doing eliptical workouts, but I want to get back outside & finish the couch-to-5K program I started. I had it in my head that if I did a race, I had to run the whole time. (shows how much I know ). But knowing that if I had to walk for some, that makes me a LOT more confident that I can do it.

Keep up the GREAT work! You'll be at 50 in no time!!

Oh, and I love your reason #9 the best. That's why I finally decided to find the "old Kim" again. It was time to take care of myself.

 

[kmp1191]

Hey Dena!! Great journal!! I love all your reasons so far!!
I've only done 2 5K's and it was great!! Honestly, the first one was amazing!! Coming into the finishing area, with EVERYONE cheering you one was really something, then I heard DH, DS10 & DD6 yelling, GO MOMMY GO!! DON'T STOP!! That was awsome!! They couldn't make it to the second race so *I* didn't feel as *special*....ya know...?

You are doing great w/ your weight loss too!!! You really are an inspiration here, keep up the good work!

marie

 

[AmyBeth68]

Here's wishing you that 50 that you deserve!! And definitely treat yourself to some new clothes girl! That will make you feel wonderful!

And don't beat yourself up for taking a break when you feel pain! You know that it is sooo important to listen to your body signals!

And I really really have to thank you for inspiring my buddy Kim to run a 5K. She just happened to pick a race that I myself am running as well. How cool is that . Now I have a Dis-Wish-Buddy to meet at the race and I won't be alone there . Well...I am hoping my family comes along too LOL! I'll need the moral support...running in August is surely a feat in itself .

 

[kimwim8]

And I really really have to thank you for inspiring my buddy Kim to run a 5K. She just happened to pick a race that I myself am running as well. How cool is that . Now I have a Dis-Wish-Buddy to meet at the race and I won't be alone there . Well...I am hoping my family comes along too LOL! I'll need the moral support...running in August is surely a feat in itself .

Awwwww, Amy!! BOTH of you ladies are my inspiration!!! So, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!

(where's the little running smilie? I need one!!)

 

[goldcupmom]

Dena, you're doing SO AWESOME!!

You've come so far and are doing SO well!

Hope you're having a good week!