Could use some thoughts about this

[GailT]

I am going to Disney for Christmas and I am all excited but on the other hand I feel guilty going and leaving behind my eldery father. I guess I booked the trip out of being so mad at my brother who doesn't do anything for our father he spent that week on the Vinyard with his GFs stepfather and mother, ARGH, talk about a high frustration level. . he didn't even call him on fathers day, oh I am so mad. My life is always put on hold, dont get me wrong I love my father dearly but his life has become my life and only me. I can't take the stress of the holidays let alone everyday life, am I wrong for waking up this morning and saying who cares, I'm going. Some might say I am wrong, I am not looking for sympathy, I am just venting, I am so confused what to do

 

[Pop Daddy]

have the girl who wont fill in for you go over at your dads , if it dont cost nothing to cancel do it and plan it in a month or two

 

[Pin Wizard]

I understand your predicament! Can you hire someone to be with your dad during that time period? Or is there a relative other than your brother that could help? YOU need a break!! And after your break, you'll be more effective. I wouldn't feel guilty about going. Just make arrangements to have your dad taken care of. Otherwise, maybe you can reschedule like Jason said.

 

[Disney Ella]

Taking care of elderly parents is hard, difficult work and there's nothing wrong with taking some time for yourself. Go, relax, have fun!

 

[Doug123]

Go. Sometimes you need to think of yourself and only yourself. I'm sure there are ways to get your dad's care covered (either by paying for someone or through other family). I also suggest looking hard into your insurance about covering some sort of in-home care on an occational basis. If that doesn't work, contact the office of your state senator or representative about state and federal programs available.

There's nothing you can do about your brother not helping out. Forget about him. All you can do is control your own actions. Find a way to make it better for you (which ultimately benefits your father because a happier you will mean better care for him).

 

[browneyes]

I'm sure if you asked your dad, he'd tell you to go have fun.

 

[Melora]

Im taking care of my elderly mother and I NEED to get away. and we have full time live in help. She is very unhappy that we are going but she is never happy about anything that we do.

Get away and take care of yourself!

 

[Lewski709]

You need to go, for sanity's sake. Someone other than you HAS to be available to watch over him

 

[DoeWDW]

Gail, take a break and go! Recharge your batteries and enjoy a change of routine and a change of scenery. Soak up all that Disney pixie dust and magic.

You can't do a good job taking care of your father if you are running on empty. If you get sick or burn out, he'll be much worse off than if you take a break to take care of yourself.

Enjoy your trip!

 

[GailT]

Thank you all for your advice. i am going. I did tell my dad and he said I should go. This doesnt mean that I will not feel guilty when I am there but I have been running on a high engery output that is burning out. I also have to worry about my health, Doesn't make my MS any better by worrying about evrything and everybody. I changed my hotels, I will be at PC for one night then the YC, I think this will be a great Christmas. We might not have a big tree in our room but i am going to buy a small artificial one and have it up plus a yankee cnadle airfreshener smelling like balsum fur.