SuiteDisney
<font color=CC66CC>Short Post Man cracks me up!<br
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Messages
- 4,729
Today we mourn the passing of an old friend and mentor, Common Sense. Common
Sense lived a long life, but died in the United States from far too many
causes early in the new millennium. No one really knows how old he was since
his birth records were lost long ago in red tape. He selflessly devoted his
life to service in schools, churches, hospitals, homes, factories, and
offices, helping folks attend to what needed to be done without fanfare and
foolishness.
For decades, petty rules, silly laws, frivolous lawsuits, and idiotic
theories held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating
such valued lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, why the
early bird gets the worm, and that life isn't always fair. He was even known
to make a rare appearance in the halls of Congress and on the judicial
bench.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not
the kids) and - on occasion - had been heard to say such things as "I don't
know the answer to that, but I'll try to find out." and "This was my fault.
I'm to blame. But it won't happen again." He was a great one for learning
from his mistakes. Actually, he was a great one for learning. A veteran of
the Industrial Revolution, the Depression, and the Technological Revolution,
Common Sense survived cultural and educational trends including body
piercing, new math, and self-esteem-trumps-all; but his health declined when
he became infected with the If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it virus.
His waning strength proved no match for the ravages of ill-conceived (and
very expensive) federal, state, and local programs. He watched in pain as
good people came under the rule of arrogant judges, greedy lawyers,
deceitful politicians, self-serving bureaucrats and bizarre ideologues.
His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented
unbelievable policies, declining even further with reports of a six-year-old
boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate and boys
suspended for pointing their fingers and shouting "Bang! Bang!" during
recess. He passed the point of no return upon hearing that public school
nurses could not inform the child's parents when a student was pregnant and
was referred to an abortion provider (perhaps after one of the condoms
provided by the school failed). His weakened heart ached as principals and
teachers intimidated parents into allowing energetic little boys to be
drugged to docility.
Common Sense lost his will to live as criminals received better treatment
than victims, federal judges stuck their noses in everything from school
prayer to professional sports, taxpayers footed the bills for sex-change
operations, marriage was downgraded to whoever and whatever, and as the
Ten Commandments became the Ten Suggestions and then became illegal.
When an individual, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of coffee
was hot, was awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the towel.
As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of awareness but was
kept informed of questionable regulations such as those for low-flow
toilets, rocking chairs, and step ladders. Weakly shaking his head, he
slipped back into a deepening coma. In a moment of lucidity, his
well-known sense of humor briefly reasserted itself as he chuckled
faintly at a manufacturer's warning: "Do not use hot iron on clothes you
are wearing."
Common Sense finally succumbed when, while the United States was fighting a
war on terrorism, a federal judge declared the Pledge of Allegiance to be
unconstitutional.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
wife, Reason; his daughter, Discretion; and his son, Responsibility. He is
survived by two step-siblings: My Rights, and Ima Whiner. Not many attended
his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
Sense lived a long life, but died in the United States from far too many
causes early in the new millennium. No one really knows how old he was since
his birth records were lost long ago in red tape. He selflessly devoted his
life to service in schools, churches, hospitals, homes, factories, and
offices, helping folks attend to what needed to be done without fanfare and
foolishness.
For decades, petty rules, silly laws, frivolous lawsuits, and idiotic
theories held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating
such valued lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, why the
early bird gets the worm, and that life isn't always fair. He was even known
to make a rare appearance in the halls of Congress and on the judicial
bench.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not
the kids) and - on occasion - had been heard to say such things as "I don't
know the answer to that, but I'll try to find out." and "This was my fault.
I'm to blame. But it won't happen again." He was a great one for learning
from his mistakes. Actually, he was a great one for learning. A veteran of
the Industrial Revolution, the Depression, and the Technological Revolution,
Common Sense survived cultural and educational trends including body
piercing, new math, and self-esteem-trumps-all; but his health declined when
he became infected with the If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it virus.
His waning strength proved no match for the ravages of ill-conceived (and
very expensive) federal, state, and local programs. He watched in pain as
good people came under the rule of arrogant judges, greedy lawyers,
deceitful politicians, self-serving bureaucrats and bizarre ideologues.
His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented
unbelievable policies, declining even further with reports of a six-year-old
boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate and boys
suspended for pointing their fingers and shouting "Bang! Bang!" during
recess. He passed the point of no return upon hearing that public school
nurses could not inform the child's parents when a student was pregnant and
was referred to an abortion provider (perhaps after one of the condoms
provided by the school failed). His weakened heart ached as principals and
teachers intimidated parents into allowing energetic little boys to be
drugged to docility.
Common Sense lost his will to live as criminals received better treatment
than victims, federal judges stuck their noses in everything from school
prayer to professional sports, taxpayers footed the bills for sex-change
operations, marriage was downgraded to whoever and whatever, and as the
Ten Commandments became the Ten Suggestions and then became illegal.
When an individual, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of coffee
was hot, was awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the towel.
As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of awareness but was
kept informed of questionable regulations such as those for low-flow
toilets, rocking chairs, and step ladders. Weakly shaking his head, he
slipped back into a deepening coma. In a moment of lucidity, his
well-known sense of humor briefly reasserted itself as he chuckled
faintly at a manufacturer's warning: "Do not use hot iron on clothes you
are wearing."
Common Sense finally succumbed when, while the United States was fighting a
war on terrorism, a federal judge declared the Pledge of Allegiance to be
unconstitutional.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his
wife, Reason; his daughter, Discretion; and his son, Responsibility. He is
survived by two step-siblings: My Rights, and Ima Whiner. Not many attended
his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
