Canadian Buffoon's Semi-EPIC Vacation - 10/29 - Link to new TR!

[Creatingpeace]

If you want more... just ask.
When in the fall are you going?

I think I did that right, thanks Doc.

We are boooked from Oct1/7th! Plans seem to be rouding out very well. Should be a fantastic trip!

 

[Creatingpeace]

Easy enough to quote...

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Thanks

 

[Thumper_Man]

So what have I missed?

Miss me?

 

[Tracy161]

Goodness no.
I don't have to.
My skin is perfectly smooth
and perfect in every way.

Ahhh, I see. If there's some kind of magic you perform to accomplish this feat, please do share!

Meanwhile, happy one month until Disney!!! If it goes anything like my last month... you'll practically be there tomorrow

 

[pkondz]

I think I did that right, thanks Doc.

You did!

We are boooked from Oct1/7th! Plans seem to be rouding out very well. Should be a fantastic trip!

Looks like we'll miss each other.
Did you book a MNSSHP?

 

[pkondz]

So what have I missed?

Oh, not much.
I got abducted by aliens
and got pregnant,
but other than that...
can't think of anything.

Miss me?

Yes!

Mike! How are you!?!?
How's Heather?
What's been going on?!?!?!?

And to the TR!!

 

[pkondz]

Ahhh, I see. If there's some kind of magic you perform to accomplish this feat, please do share!

Clean living...


and dirty thoughts.

Meanwhile, happy one month until Disney!!!

Thanks!

If it goes anything like my last month... you'll practically be there tomorrow

Um... is that a good thing?

And... you're leaving tomorrow!!!
Have a great trip!!!

 

[afwdwfan]

Disney is the last place you
want to squash a rodent.

They have friends in high places.

I hear the rodents there poop gold too.

Even though I'm a renowned
attempted-squirrel-murderer.

But you're a failure at that, so...

Within seconds, PR and Elle were
chatting away and completely
ignoring the two old dudes
who were paying for everything.


And that's okay.
That's the way it's always been.

I'm glad everyone hit it off so well!

It says, "Proud Parent".
And you can juuuust make
it out at is flies off my head.

We boarded the back of the
boat and pillaged and plundered
and all in all had a fun ride.

Another awesome picture!

We glanced back as they
walked away and noticed
the little boy holding
his dad's hand in his hook.

Worth it.

Okay, now what?
We've convocated on Splash
and privateered on PoTC...
"What's that?" Elle asked, pointing.
"Tiki birds." I warily replied.
"Can we go?" She said, excitedly.

Of course!!!!

Of course a CM showed up about
two seconds later and removed
the rope.



Another close escape, thwarted.

I will say this about the Tiki Birds.
It's definitely air conditioned.

If it were like the one in Disneyland where you take your Dole Whip in, would that make it better, or no?

We decided to skip it.
My heart leapt with joy.
And then was dashed as she
reasoned that we could
try again later.

Maybe she’ll forget?

How long have you been a father, again???

"maybe she'll forget"

Yeah, that never works.

Took this shot of the Tron
construction site.
I wonder how much closer
it will be to being finished when
I see it again four months later.

Wow... I can say the difference between this picture and one month ago is staggering!

Must admit I felt badly for her.
I'm thinking she probably has
to put up with some pretty
rude behaviour from ill-mannered
guests on a regular basis.

But I'm glad she was a good sport and you got your picture without being arrested for sexual assault or anything of that nature.

The duck had just laid some eggs!
I think this because when I mentioned
it to Elle, she spotted an egg about
six inches away from the others.
And when I looked again, later,
momma had moved it over to join
the other eggs.
Would seem to mean that at least
that egg had just been laid?

Neat! Not something you see everyday! And I'm sure she's very used to the fireworks.

The show was fun to watch,
as always, but I still feel a little
nostalgic for Wishes.
HEA is fine, but it doesn't
get you in the feels like
Wishes used to do.

I couldn't agree more.

 

[pkondz]

I hear the rodents there poop gold too.

Did you see this article?
Disney Becomes First Studio with 5 Films Grossing Over $1 Billion Within A Year

But you're a failure at that, so...

<hangs head in shame...>

I'm glad everyone hit it off so well!

We all did!

They must have this massive
pool of floating hats by
the end of the day.

Another awesome picture!

Thanks!

Of course!!!!

If it were like the one in Disneyland where you take your Dole Whip in, would that make it better, or no?

oooohhhh… yes!

How long have you been a father, again???

"maybe she'll forget"

Yeah, that never works.

Minds like a steel trap.
Except for chores.
Then suddenly they have
advanced Alzheimer's
or something.

Wow... I can say the difference between this picture and one month ago is staggering!

I thought it might!
I'll see what they've done
in just under a month.

But I'm glad she was a good sport and you got your picture without being arrested for sexual assault or anything of that nature.

But it was a close one.
I could tell she was thinking
about it.

Neat! Not something you see everyday! And I'm sure she's very used to the fireworks.

Unless...

"Wow, I just flew in from the North
and boy are my arms tired!
This looks like a nice quiet
spot to rest and lay some eggs."

I couldn't agree more.

 

[thepicklebee]

I mostly lurk around these boards but I just thought I’d fan girl a moment and tell you how much I enjoy your trip reports. I always get excited when I see you’ve started another one.

 

[pkondz]

I mostly lurk around these boards but I just thought I’d fan girl a moment and tell you how much I enjoy your trip reports.

Awww! Thanks!!

And to the TR!

I always get excited when I see you’ve started another one.

Oops! I think you have me confused
with someone who actually writes well.

I see you're heading to da World
in September. What are your dates?
Might be able to swing a quick "hello".

 

[thepicklebee]

I see you're heading to da World
in September. What are your dates?
Might be able to swing a quick "hello".

I am spending 10 glorious days in the Orlando area - although have of it is getting eaten up by a work conference that is funding my free flight. I’ll be there Sept 14-24th!

 

[Thumper_Man]

Oh, not much.
I got abducted by aliens
and got pregnant,
but other than that...
can't think of anything.

Yes!

Mike! How are you!?!?
How's Heather?
What's been going on?!?!?!?

And to the TR!!

I'm doing good. Just been busy at work. Spending time in the forests like a normal bunny would.

Lady H has had a few minor health issues we've been tending to but for the most part she's good. PM me if you want more info.

As for what's going on, getting ready to head back to the forest to celebrate our anniversary. If you recall we were going to do a pre-anniversary celebration at WDW. Unfortunately those plans fell through. Don't you just hate it when life gets in the way? So plan B is more camping and fishing.

I'll read the chapters and comment later. I was secretly on the Dis trying to plan our trip until the earth opened up, swallowed me hole and spit me out cuz it thought I tasted terrible. I guess I needed salt.

I see Elle is part of this trip. How young is she again? 21?

How's K and R? Have they thrown you out of the house yet?

Gotta run.

 

[Gerweniel]

Canadian Buffoon's Semi-EPIC Vacation

The Konk Show


Well, hi there!
Welcome to another
Canadian Buffoon adventure!
And... bonus! On this trip
you get two buffoons for
the price of one!


Or... is that a detriment?

I'll let you decide.


Hmm... since I'm going
with my oh-so-wonderful
oldest daughter, perhaps it's a
plus one for her and a minus
one for me?

Who are we? I'm glad you asked!
I'm me, pkondz, and she's her, Elle.
A father and daughter from the coldest
reaches of Canada.


Does that clear that up?


What's that you say?
You want photos?
A way of putting a face
to the names?

Well... I have very good news...
and verrrrrrrry bad news.


The good news? You'll see her
on the very first photo of the TR!
The bad news?
You'll see me too. (A little later)
And for that, I apologize.

But ya gotta take the bad
with the good.

Which is why I put brown sugar
on oatmeal.


A quick note about the title.
Several ladies, of whom I know
a few, were all meeting up in
Disney on an EPIC Ladies Trip.
And several are writing EPIC
trip reports as a result.
While I was asked to join
in on the festivities, I didn't
feel it was my place to
intrude.
That and Elle isn't very big
on meeting people she
doesn't know, sealed the deal.

I did however manage to meet
a few of them over the course
of our own trip.
Hence, while not an EPIC trip,
there is a loose connection.
So... Semi-EPIC.


I've written how this trip
came about, over on my
co-current TR:
Canadian Buffoon's Back to Front Vacation.
But for those of you who aren't
or haven't followed that,
a brief recap is forthcoming.

For those of you familiar with the story,
fear not. I have prepared a life-saving
(due to death by dullness) escape hatch!

What's that you say?
You've already just about died
from dullness from a surfeit
of putrid prose?
Well, then allow me to finish
you off! Just keep reading.


Okay, for those of you who know
the back story...

SKIP THIS NEXT PART!!!

Elle is graduating this spring
with her first degree.
(A B.A as her first step
to her B. Ed. which she starts
in the fall.)

About six or so months ago,
Elle came up to me with
a proposal:
"Dad. Elsa and I want to go
to Disneyworld. Can you come
too and show us around?"

I laughed in her face
and told her to sink or swim!
Disney is prime life lesson
proving grounds.
Do your research!
Plan your ADRS, your FPs,
your touring plans, your...

No. Wait.
Oh! Right...
I want to go!
I quite happily agreed.


A month or so later,
Elle comes up to me
with an amendment
to her original proposal.
"Dad. Elsa can't go anymore.
It's too expensive. Can we
go just the two of us?

I told her that an amendment
on our existing contract
would involve legal ramifications
and possibly actuarial and
astrological too.
"If this adds up, what's your sign here?"

Dang it! I keep getting
this wrong.
That didn't happen either.
I quite happily agreed once again.


Another few weeks or a month
or so go by and...

Elle is involved in a little
fender bender.
No one was hurt except
the bumper of her car.
To avoid insurance penalties,
she decides to pay the cost
as opposed to putting in
an insurance claim.

Then it was:
"Dad. I don't think I can
afford to go. Too many expenses."

Hang on! I have a Disney trip
that I'm going on!
I'm not risking not going!

"How about I pay for your
airline ticket (I had enough points
to cover us both), and you
room with me, so that won't
cost you anything and you
just pay for your park ticket
and food?"

She happily agreed.

She had a narrow window
of time that she could go.
She had to go after her classes
were all done but before
summer employment ramped up.

So we picked a date that just
happened to coincide with
the same dates that a few
of my DIS friends were going and...


OKAY IF YOU SKIPPED...
START READING
FROM HERE AGAIN!


It was a dark and stormy night.
The seas were angry, see?
Si!


NO! HERE! HERE!
START HERE!!!


We're off to Disneyworld!
With a surprise appearance by...

oops!

I'm getting ahead of myself.


Let's start with the getting
to Disneyworld, shall we?


April 29th.
It snowed this morning.
There is nothing else I
can add about this day.

Sure, I can say that I was
incredibly relieved to finally
be getting some time off...

But...

It snowed.


I spent the day packing
and not looking
(or going) outside.

I also checked us in for
our flights and...

We were flying with WestJet.
I have a WestJet credit card.
I and my travel party get one
free checked bag each.
Except... it was telling me
that Elle's bag was going
to cost $30.

For reasons that will become
clearer later, I had to book
our flights separately.
I knew that even if I called
to fight the extra fee...
I wouldn't win.
"I'm sorry, sir. But since
she's traveling on her own,
separate ticket, she'll have
to pay. There's nothing we
can do."

Yeah, yeah.
I paid the fee... grumbling all along.


So let's see... snow,
packing, check in.

Yup. That's it.
I was in bed by 10pm.


April 30th
The alarm woke me
at a very pleasant 1:30
in the morning.
For a second, I couldn't
get my bearings.
The dogs, who know that
a morning alarm means food,
looked at me quizzically.
I'm not sure if it was a
"Is it breakfast already?" look,
or a "Are you insane? Do you
know what time it is???" look.


Probably a bit of both.


I wandered down the hall
to make sure that Elle was up.
She was.
Kay (my youngest DD)
was going to drive us to the
airport, but she was out
with some friends, trying to
stay awake.
She'd said she'd be home
by 2am.
(She was. Still didn't stop
me from imagining
(i.e. worrying) that she'd
fallen asleep and wouldn't
show up.)

Elle, it turned out, hadn't
gotten home until just after
midnight.
She'd wanted to bring some
US cash with her...
but.. Wonderful planning on her part...
She'd waited until the last day to
take out the money.
Not just the last day... but the last
night.
After the banks were closed.
So she was forced to withdraw
$500 before midnight
(her withdrawal limit),
and then another $500 after
midnight.




Don't have kids, folks.
You heard it here first.


Car loaded, and our bleary
selves loaded, we headed out
and arrived at the airport
at 3am, two hours ahead
of flight time.

We got our baggage tags at the kiosk
and got in line to drop off our bags.
We were first in line!

Which really just means we could've
come a little later.

What?
Sorry?
You want to see at least one
photo before you pass away
from utter and complete
boredom?

Well... You only had to ask!

Yes. We were too first in line.
The other people you see needed
additional help with their luggage.
We were first in line at the bag
drop-off.

We were waved forward and
Elle placed her bag on the scale.
33lbs. Well under the 50lb limit.
I put mine on next... fairly sure
that it was going to be over.


Yep.
55lbs.


The WestJet attendant mumbled.
"It's too early for this."
She then told us that next time
we should distribute the weight
between the two bags,
but she'd let it go this time.
I asked her. "Even though
we have two separate tickets?"
She said yes.

I debated telling her that if
WestJet expected me to
"distribute the weight" then
they better not charge me
for Elle's bag.

I wisely kept my mouth shut.
"Yes sir! We'll refund that $30.
And now if you'll just pay the
$100 over-weight penalty?
Have a nice flight!"


We placed the bags on
the conveyor
and watched them get
eaten up into the
bowels of the airport.

I could've sworn I heard
a faint burp as the last
bag disappeared from view.


We headed over to security
where we were met by
two unsmiling men who
informed us that security
wouldn't open until 3:30am.
It was 3:15am, so we didn't
have long to wait.

I amused myself by
taking this photo
of the scheduled departures.

I guess people from Calgary
have something in common
with marmots.
(Inside joke.)

After 15 minutes, the line
opened and...
No bringing your pot
with you, folks!

Cocaine, crack, meth...
Those apparently are
perfectly fine.
But pot? Nooooooo!


Have you ever seen
a more empty airport
security area???


One nice thing about
your home airport
(if you travel enough)
is you get pretty familiar
with the dos and don'ts.
I know I can leave my
shoes on.
As well as my belt.
It doesn't set off the metal...

<BEEP!>

Okay... maybe they've adjusted
the sensitivity on their detector.
I go back and take off the belt.
At least now I know for sure that...

<BEEP!>

Other than the plate in my head,
the only metal I have on me is
my watch.
Take that off and...

<silence>

As I was saying, it's good to
know all the ins and outs
and dos and don'ts at
your local airport.


"Is this your bag?"
The security agent was
pointing at my bag.
I'm very used to my bag
being searched at X-ray.
Not sure why, but it
happens fairly often.

"Yes it is." I replied.
And before he could ask;
"Feel free to do whatever
you need to it."

So he dropped it on the
floor and stomped it
with his booted feet.


No. Wait.
What he did was open it
up and remove a teensy
tiny pair of cuticle scissors.
"I just have to show this
to the X-Ray person." He said.

He did. She saw. He put it back.
I can only presume that he thought
they were cute and wanted to show her.

Ah... young love.

I digress.


After retrieving our belongings,
putting my watch back on,
pulling up my pants and putting
my belt back on,
(always travel with clean underwear.
umm... always travel with underwear.
I'm looking at you, Liesa.)
we wandered off in search of our gate.

As a little treat for Elle,
(and because I had my
own reasons)
I had upgraded our seats
to "Plus" seats.
Some of the advantages
to Plus seats are more leg
room, no middle passenger,
priority boarding and free snacks.

We were the first to board.
She looks happy about
her extra space, don't you think?

Once everyone was boarded,
the flight attendant started
her spiel.
"Welcome aboard WestJet
Flight 520 to Toronto."

Did I mention that direct flights
from Winnipeg to Orlando
are virtually non-existent?
I've always had to connect.
And it's almost always through
Toronto.

"Our pilot today is Captain Frank..."
At this point I got really interested.
"Oh, please. Oh, please. Let the
co-pilot's name be Beans!
or Stein! Even better!"

"... and in the right seat is his
co-pilot, Captain Smith."

Or whatever. I have no idea.
All I know is I was not on a
plane piloted by Frank and Beans,
or Frank and Stein.

Bitter, bitter disappointment.


The attendant finished her safety
talk and the pilot came on to inform
us that they would be de-icing the
aircraft prior to take-off.


De-icing! On April 30th!


When Elle heard that, her eyes
went big and round.
"Ice?" She nervously asked.
I explained that ice, while a very
bad thing on airplanes, wouldn't
be a problem for us since we were
de-icing.
She chatted away as the plane
taxied over to the de-icing bay.
"I did this today, and this today..."

Wait... why does she keep talking
about yesterday's events and referring
to them as "today's"?

Se explained that she thought it
would be a "good idea" to just not
go to bed since we had to leave
at 2:30am.

She'd gotten up for work at
5:30am the day before.
By now, she'd been up for
almost 24 hours.



Don't have kids, folks.
You heard it here first.


As the plane was de-iced,
Elle fell silent as she watched.
Eventually, the plane was
ready and started to taxi
to the runway.

Elle remained silent
and seemingly mesmerized
by the passing blue taxiway lights.

I craned forward and...

Yep. She'd passed out.
Fast asleep.

I smiled and sat back.


She slept through the take-off.
She didn't wake up again
until the plane touched down
in Toronto.

We were scheduled to depart
at 5am and were airborne just
a few minutes late at 5:15am.
Our scheduled time of arrival
in Toronto was 8:20am,
but we arrived at 8:03.

The attendant made this
announcement:
"Welcome to the centre of
the Universe."
(Canadian inside joke)
She continued with the
normal "Please remain seated...
blah, blah, blah."
But then finished with:
"We're seventeen minutes ahead
of schedule. So next time we're
late, we'll call it even."




Now even though we were early,
Elle and I still had a fairly tight
connection to catch.
Our bags were checked through
to Orlando, but we were not.

An advantage to sitting up front...
First off the plane.
We immediately made our
way to security.

Yes, even though we'd already
been through security in
Winnipeg, and even though our
bags were tagged through
to Orlando, we still had to
go through security once again.

This time I didn't mess around.
I took off my shoes, belt and watch
and went through without a hitch
other than the hitching up
of my pants.

We were directed off to the side
(I assume randomly) while TSA
determined if we were carrying bombs,
guns or worse... cannabis.

There were monitors on the wall
showing the status of your flight
as well as the initials of those
allowed to proceed through customs.

I'd never seen that before.
I hope to never see it again.

Minutes were ticking by.
I knew we still had to go
through customs and our flight
was boarding in 50 minutes.
That might seem like a long time,
but...

Every minute was torture.

We finally were allowed through
to this room.

Everyone had to scan their ID,
have a photo done of them
and answer general questions.
(Like... are you carrying a bomb,
firearms or (gasp!) cannabis.)
I looked for the button that said
"You already searched my bag"
but there wasn't one.
I just clicked on "No".

Once that was taken care of...
You got in line.
A long line.
It wound back and forth several
times before terminating at a bored
looking customs agent.
The line... didn't move quickly.
I kept nervously looking at my watch.
(Why yes, I did put it back on.
Thanks for asking.)

Boarding was scheduled to begin
at 9:20.
We entered the line around 9:00

9:00
We turn down the first of several bends.
9:05
Not sure if we're gonna make our
boarding time...
9:07
A group of six or so join someone
that's ahead of us. A small part
of me dies.
9:10
We still have at least another
five minutes in line.
This is going to be tight.
A group of people tries
cutting through the line.
"We're sorry, but our flight
is boarding at 9:30!"
Someone ahead says
"So is ours."
I say. "Ours is at 9:20."
Suitably chastened, they
don't try to cut anymore.

We arrive in front of the customs
official at 9:15.

"Where are you going?"
"Orlando."
"Business or pleasure?"
"Pleasure."
"Traveling with more than
$10,000 dollars?"

Once.
Just once.
I want to answer "Yes" to
that question.
But I am not an oil baron
(or a drug dealer. I saw the sign.)
so the answer is always "No".

He does not ask me if I am
constipated because I am
practically pooping my pants
(mercifully held up by my belt.
Why yes, I did put it back on.
Thanks for asking.) with anxiety
that we're going to miss our
connection.
And frankly... we have FPs
that just can't be missed.

He hands our passports back
and we run in search of our gate.

You think I'm kidding.
"Oh, pkondz is exaggerating.
At most they walked fairly
quickly."

No.
I mean... We ran.

We made it to our gate at 9:23.
They had started boarding...
but were still in the process.
Phew!

If anyone at the back of our
Winnipeg - Toronto flight
had to go through that
initial screening...
I doubt they made the flight.

So... do we look more happy
that we made it? Or relieved?

The plane pushed back from
the gate on time and taxied
out for take-off.
As we taxied, I spotted
WestJet's "Frozen" plane.

I wonder if it always needs de-icing?
And sorry for the lousy resolution.
I took it with my phone and it was
a fair distance away.
(I zoomed in and then cropped, too.)


We were airborne a minute after 10am.
I watched Passengers (with Jennifer
Lawrence and Chris Pratt.)
Seen it before and liked it.
Elle... passed out shortly after
take-off.


We arrived early, once again.
I'm really liking this whole
"early" thing.
While we weren't seated at the
front of the plane this time,
we also didn't have a connection
to make other than DME.

But first... our first ride of the trip!
The fake-o-rail!

Who else loves taking this
when they arrive in Florida?

We got to DME at 12:48pm
and walked through an empty
queue and barely broke stride
as we marched right onto
a waiting bus.
Our checked bags would find
us in our rooms later on,
so we just dumped off our
carry-ons.
I did however, bring my
camera bag inside the bus, with me.
At 12:55pm we were on our way!

A word about my camera bag.
It's heavy.
It has a DSLR camera with
add on dual battery pack,
and five lenses of various sizes.
I stowed it in a compartment
above my head.
In hindsight, I wish I'd put it
over someone else's head.
Because about 5-10 minutes
after we got going, it fell out
of the overhead bin and landed
on my head before falling into
the aisle.
There was a collective
"oooohhhhh!!!" from the
seats behind me.

I suppose it's a good thing
it hit my head on the way down.
Probably saved me some repairs.
I can always replace the plate
in my head, but a good camera
isn't easy to find in Disney.

Soon we saw this Magical sight.

Apologies for the photo.
We were not at the front
of the bus and I was seeing
double for some reason.

At 1:21pm (I looked), we
arrived at our resort.

I didn't take many photos
when we arrived,
but I promise you'll see
some later in the TR.

Our resort for our stay
was at...

Old Key West!

I need to give a big
shout-out and an even
bigger "THANK YOU!"
to @docsoliday1.
When he heard Elle and I
were heading down,
he offered to rent his
DVC points to us.
So for what amounted to
about the same price as
a Value resort, we got to
stay at OKW instead.

Thanks again Doc!
It was very much appreciated.
I'll have a bit more to say
on that subject in the next update.
And at some point, I'll have
more resort photos as well.


I was pretty sure that our room
wouldn't be ready yet, and had
planned to leave our bags at
bell services.
I wasn't disappointed.
Our room was not ready yet.

About a week ago, I had used
Touringplans website to send
a room request to OKW.
I asked for a ground floor
and close to Hospitality House.

We were told that our room
was indeed on the ground floor.
Here are your magic bands and
we'll send a text when it's ready.

Just hold on a second, lady.
This ain't my first rodeo.

I asked the CM to point out
where our room was located.

She grabbed a map and
explained it thusly:
"We're here (circles Hospitality House)
and to get to your room, you just hop
on a resort shuttle and take it along
this road, past the pool, around the
bend, past Typhoon Lagoon, get on I-4,
follow that past Celebration, keep going
until you reach Tampa, get on a boat,
take the boat to a bigger boat, cruise
past St. Petersburg, transfer to an
even bigger ship, cruise out into
the Gulf of Mexico, past Havana,
cruise down past Central America,
go through the Panama Canal,
dock at Panama City, take a cab
out into the rainforest, get on a
burro and ride it into the mountains.
Stop there."

"That's where our room is?" I asked.

"No." She answered. "That's just the
resting point. The long part of the trip
is for the next day."


Okay...
Maybe I'm exaggerating just a touch.
But...
OKW is big and sprawling.
And where our room was...
Was in the farthest building away.


"Do you have anything closer?" I asked.
I pointed. "Maybe in one of these building?"
She tapped at her keyboard...
Made a phone call...
"I don't know if I can get you
the ground floor..." She said.

I told her we'd take any floor
including the roof if it got us
a closer building.
She pointed to a nearby building
on the map.
"How's this?" She asked.
It was less than a 2-minute walk away.
I nodded enthusiastically.
"It might not be ready until 4pm." She said.
I assured her that was fine.


Room issue resolved, it was time to eat!
Neither of us had eaten anything, really, since...
Well, yesterday.

I had my eye on the resort's restaurant
and had shared the menu with Elle.
She agreed that it sounded good.
Elle is pescatarian (she doesn't eat meat
but does eat fish) so making sure
the menu is okay with her is important.

We popped over to Olivia's which was
pretty much empty at that time of day.

Right away, we liked the
way it looked.
Very inviting with the décor,
tin ceiling and fans.

There were a few items
on the menu that we
had both agreed to try.

Elle ordered water to drink.
Kids these days.
The waiter recommended and
I couldn't resist asking for
a Watermelon Lemonade
How could you not???
It sounded light and refreshing.
And it was a bit early for booze.

It was good!
Sweet... which I like,
and refreshing.

We split an order of
the crabcake,

conch fritters,

and we each had our
own conch chowder.

Of the three, the chowder
was the clear winner here,
with the fritters a close second.
The crabcake, while not bad,
was a distant third.

But the chowder was delicious!
And the fritters, with the key
lime mustard, were wonderful.

And it was here, at Olivia's,
that I learned that it's not
Conch... which you'd think
would be pronounced like
"launch" or "paunch",
but Conch, pronounced "Konk".
Like the sound it makes
when a heavy camera bag
falls and hits you on the head.


I think I'll leave this update there.
I've already taken you over 2,000
miles from where we started.
We'll enjoy our crab and "konk",
and take up again when
our bellies are full.



And...
Did you see it?
For those new to my reports,
I usually hide something that's
easily identifiable as out of place
in one or more photos.
(When I do, I'll tell you how many.)
Usually it's a Marvin the Martian,
but occasionally it's something else.


Coming up... Where do we go next?

Chapter 2. Talk To The Hand​

When I saw your title "Canadian Buffoon" I thought it was about my boss......, but all jokes aside, I'm hooked on your report and pics! Great sense of humor and although late to the party, I'm enjoying the trip report! Thanks.

 

[pkondz]

I am spending 10 glorious days in the Orlando area - although have of it is getting eaten up by a work conference that is funding my free flight. I’ll be there Sept 14-24th!

Well, if you want to say "Hi",
PM me and we'll see if we can't
figure something out.

 

[pkondz]

I'm doing good. Just been busy at work. Spending time in the forests like a normal bunny would.

Watch out for foxes.

Heh... That might be what
Lady H says to you.

Lady H has had a few minor health issues we've been tending to but for the most part she's good. PM me if you want more info.

I'll do that right after this post.

As for what's going on, getting ready to head back to the forest to celebrate our anniversary. If you recall we were going to do a pre-anniversary celebration at WDW. Unfortunately those plans fell through. Don't you just hate it when life gets in the way? So plan B is more camping and fishing.

Plan B isn't too shabby.
Heck anything that isn't work
isn't too shabby!

I'll read the chapters and comment later. I was secretly on the Dis trying to plan our trip until the earth opened up, swallowed me hole and spit me out cuz it thought I tasted terrible. I guess I needed salt.

And here I thought you
were already salty.

I see Elle is part of this trip. How young is she again? 21?

Close! (good memory...
or good researching)
She's 22.

How's K and R? Have they thrown you out of the house yet?

Not yet, but it's been close
a couple times!
R had some issues of her
own but is doing okay now.
K is doing really good.

Gotta run.

Don't you mean hop?

 

[pkondz]

When I saw your title "Canadian Buffoon" I thought it was about my boss......,

Well, even bosses take vacations.
Hmmm... some bosses seem to
be on permanent vacation.

But anyways... to the TR!

but all jokes aside, I'm hooked on your report and pics!

Aw, thanks!

Great sense of humor and although late to the party, I'm enjoying the trip report! Thanks.

Nope! You're right on time.
Any time you show up
is the absolute best time to be here.

 

[pkondz]

Too Bad, So Sad

Rise and shine!
It's moving day!
We both got up at 7:30am
and finished packing up
all of our shtuff.
We stuffed our shtuff and
packed our packages and
were out the door under
an hour later.

Goodbye OKW room!


We checked out of the hotel
and then checked our bags
at 8:25am.
We then boarded a bus
at... 8:25am.

No waiting. Disney was trying
to make up for making us
wait the maximum 5 minutes
the previous night.

You better suck up, Disney!


We were heading over to DHS.
Unlike the last time we went,
there was no anniversary
celebration going on.
So it should be a lot quieter,
right?

I mean, it's not high season
or (worse) Christmas season.
It's May! Nice, sedate, May.
May the fourth, to be precise.

It's just gotta be dead there, right?


<cricket><cricket><cricket>


We arrived shortly after at DHS
to scenes of long lines of people
waiting to get in.
However... this isn't Epcot, folks.
We were through bag check
in no time.
We even got to skip
the metal detectors.

We had some time before our
first FPs of the day.
The standby line for TSMM was
already up to 40 minutes.
We both figured that it wasn't
going to get any lower today, so...
We hopped in line.
Which was 45 minutes long.
Fairly accurate.

I got "Best in Car" with my score,
but it didn't really matter.
What did matter was that
I beat Elle.

Always beat your children.
Builds character.

We left Toy Story Land
and swam upstream against
the current and met up
with @missjackiemcg and
@Pluto0809 who were
bobbing along towards us.
We stopped briefly and
managed to exchange quick
hellos before they were
swept off to other pursuits.


We had a FP coming up
so headed down Sunset.
Did I mention it was
May the Fourth?

Would it surprise you to
know that at 10am the
wait time for TOT was
110 minutes and RNRC was
already up to 115 minutes?

We popped into the FP line
at 10:15am and were in the studio
helping Aerosmith lay down some
sick tracks by 10:28am.

We'd already done this ride,
so it didn't have quite the
excitement factor that the
first go-around did.

Contrast our expressions
with the two young ladies
in front of us.
Oh how I hope they got
their PP photo!


We had time to kill before
our next FP and there was
no way in HECK I was gonna
stand in line for two hours!

I noted that the next BatB
show was starting in
half an hour and Elle
said she'd like to see it.

I can make this happen!

We found some seats and
I went and grabbed us some
frozen lemonades over at
Anaheim Produce.

Wow those were good!
Highly recommend on
a hot day.

And, dude?
If you hadn't been so
engrossed with your
phone, you could've
totally photo-bombed us.


The show was cute but
definitely a one and done.
Except this was more of
a two and phew for us,
but she didn't remember it
since it had been ten years.

The show mercifully ended not
overly long after it started and
we zipped over to TOT where
it was a walk on, thanks to
a strategically selected FP.
I did this for Elle of course.
She loves TOT.
I was just along for the ride.

We had plenty of time,
but decided to make our
way over towards our
upcoming ADR.

There was an Indy show
that had just started.
We were told it was standing
room only but we decided
to watch anyways.
(Standing room only! For Indy!)

The show was fun as always
and Elle enjoyed it.
She said she remembered
bits and pieces of it.


It was now time to make our
way over to our ADR.
We were going to try a place
that was new to both of us.
Mama Melrose.

When I first joined the DIS,
(over ten years ago!!!)
I mostly was looking at the
restaurant reviews.
Consistently, Mama Melrose
was rated as the worst
restaurant in all of Disney.
But I'd lately noticed that more
and more positive reports
were popping up, including
glowing praise from @chunkymonkey .

We were led through the dining room...

...which I thought was really
nicely done.
Like the lights? I did.
We were sat underneath
this guy:

Elle was ready to eat
and so was I!

We started with the
"Fresh Mozzarella and
Vine-ripened Tomatoes".
Not sure why they don't
just say "Caprese salad".
Not wordy enough I guess.
The more words you use,
the more you can charge.

Nevertheless, it was yummy!
(As evidenced by the distinct
lack of evidence left afterwards.)

Oops! Trip report fail.
But my tummy thanks you
for your indulgence.
No. Wait... We indulged.
But I digest.

Elle opted for the Salmon
with Pappardelle pasta
and asparagus.
She liked the fish, but wasn't
a fan of the pasta.

I had decided on a dish, but
when our server informed us
of the special, I changed my mind.

Braised short ribs with
a mushroom risotto.

The ribs were fall-off-the-bone
delicious and that risotto!
WOW!
It was fantastic.
I have dreams now of that
risotto.
We meet again and are
married.
And we (my tummy and I)
live happily ever after.

<sigh>

Want.


The only thing marring the dish
was that tiny piece of green
on the plate at about ten o'clock.
How dare they!?!?!?!


Okay, one more FP to use up
then we're gonna see what
trouble we can get into after.

We got to SDD only to see there
was a 120 minute wait.
But with our FPs we pretty much
just walked on.

It's a fun little coaster.
Not really thrilling...
but fun to ride all the same.

And then Elle said it.
"You know how it goes up and
down in that one part?
That's like a slinky going
down stairs."

Do you think she's right?
Did they design it that way???

FPs all used up for the day,
it was time to see what was
still available.
Probably not SDD...
Or even AS2...
But you never know...
Maybe RNRC?...
Or TOT?...

We got...
Voyage of the Little Mermaid.


This actually turned out to be
a good attraction to have a FP for.
While the show itself is pretty
forgettable, having a FP allowed
us to enter into the waiting area
ahead of the standby line.

The waiting area is air conditioned.

And while we waited in comfort,
I snagged two more FPs for
the Frozen Sing Along.
I'd never been, and had
heard good things.

Sorry about the crappy photo. Just had my phone.

We paused on our way to
Frozen to buy a bag of
crack... er… popcorn.
(Same thing, amirite?)
And as we scarfed down
popped kernels of heaven,
a very, very light rain
began to fall.
It was so light that it
was almost unnoticeable.
But immediately, an
announcement blared out
over the loudspeakers.
"Ladies and gentlemen.
Due to the weather, today's
March of the First Order
has been canceled."

A load groan of dismay
and disbelief rose into
the air from the
disappointed hordes.

Elle responded by saying.
"Too bad, so sad."
She didn't care.
She really didn't care.
Not exactly a Star Wars fan.
She was somehow spared
for uttering such blasphemy.


The Frozen Sing Along was...
Hilarious! We both enjoyed
it a lot!

After that, we headed out
of the park.
But not before spending
an extra $500 or so.
(It was then that I
purchased my AP.)


We headed down to
the boat transportation,
arriving at 4:33pm.
We were boarding our
boat at 4:37pm.
Four minute wait.
You're slipping Disney.

But I am a man of tolerance
and I allowed them their
slight transgression.
Besides, it was still under
five minutes.

I settled for a stern
"Harrumph!" directed
at the ship's captain.

He hung his head in shame.

As he should.


We arrived at
Beaches & Cream
at five after five.
We were a touch early,
were asked to wait, and
were handed a buzzer.

As we convalesced outside,
I noticed something...
well, let me describe it.

We were relaxing outside
as we waited, and we were
fairly close to one section
of Stormalong Bay.
A life-guard was pacing
back and forth, back and forth.
She would quickly take about
five steps, spin 180 degrees
and retrace her steps.
She never stopped.

1 2 3 4 5 <SPIN!>
5 4 3 2 1 <SPIN!>
Repeat ad infinitum.

Of course I immediately
figured out that she was
keeping an eye on two
sections of the pool, but...
She never stopped!
After a few minutes,
a second life-guard came
along and took over
from the first one.
Would she do the same?

Yep!

1 2 3 4 5 <SPIN!>
5 4 3 2 1 <SPIN!>

I had to know.
I asked Elle to excuse me
and went over to talk
to the life-guard.
Now, I know they are
performing an important
function and I didn't
want to distract or
disturb her on her rounds.
I matched her pace for pace
(1 2 3 4 5 <SPIN!>)
and told her not to stop
and she didn't have to
look at me, but could
(5 4 3 2 1 <SPIN!>)
I ask her a question?
She told me I could.
"How long do you do this?"
I asked.
(1 2 3 4 5 <SPIN!>)
Apparently they rotate
around the pool, watching
different spots in a shift.
Each shift is, on average,
(5 4 3 2 1 <SPIN!>)
seven hours long.
They spend 30-45 minutes
on each station.
So... for 30-45 minutes,
you're doing...
1 2 3 4 5 <SPIN!>

I don't know what they're
paying these kids...
But it isn't enough.

I returned to Elle,
shaking my head.


Our buzzer went off
about 5:20pm.
Only a 15-minute wait
and we were early
anyways.

Apparently, I take this
photo of Elle on just
about every trip.
I hadn't
even realized!

Okay, this is better.
(Is it?)

We placed our order
and Elle went off to
pick some tunes.

She settled on some
Beach Boys.
Appropriate.

We split an order of
grilled cheese and
tomato soup.

Mmmmmm...

Why split?
It's not that big...

Because, this:

Hello my beauties.
Oh! And that's what
half orders look like,
if you've never seen
that before.
(Yes, you can order
a half-order!
Thanks @franandaj
for that tip!)

I think we'll leave off
with us being utter
and complete gluttons.

And loving it!


In case you didn't see it
in the last chapter:

And...
Did you see it in this chapter?



Coming up... You lift me up

Chapter 11. Come To The Dark Side​

 

[Creatingpeace]

You did!

Looks like we'll miss each other.
Did you book a MNSSHP?

I did we are going on Thursday the 4th...hoping for a great time. Us Canadians spend a small fortune on these ticketed events wth the exchange! We loved the Xmas party and will be better prepared this time.

 

[Steppesister]

Correct, and...
correct.

Pfffft.....

May the fourth, to be precise.

Oh dear God.

waiting to get in.
However... this isn't Epcot, folks.
We were through bag check
in no time.

I really, REALLY hope the new entrance is going to help this colassal boondoggle they call bag check soon.

Wow those were good!
Highly recommend on
a hot day.

I concur. Amazing cup of perfection on a hot day!

I did this for Elle of course.
She loves TOT.
I was just along for the ride.

... um, so does this mean you don't like the ride? Choose your answer wisely...

The ribs were fall-off-the-bone
delicious and that risotto!
WOW!
It was fantastic.
I have dreams now of that
risotto.
We meet again and are
married.
And we (my tummy and I)
live happily ever after.

<sigh>

Want.

Dang it. I KNEW I should have booked this instead of Prime Time!

Do you think she's right?
Did they design it that way???

Yes.

We got...
Voyage of the Little Mermaid.

Stooping low. Snoooooooooooooooozer.

The Frozen Sing Along was...
Hilarious! We both enjoyed
it a lot!

I have done that either, and will in a few weeks.

A life-guard was pacing
back and forth, back and forth.
She would quickly take about
five steps, spin 180 degrees
and retrace her steps.
She never stopped.

1 2 3 4 5 <SPIN!>
5 4 3 2 1 <SPIN!>
Repeat ad infinitum.

Sounds like the March of the 1st Order was back on! You didn't miss it afterall!