based on the rsvp thread..are thank you notes a thing of the past?

[lynxstch]

Probably too long for some..I apologize in advance..but this has me steaming...
I sent a baby shower gift (which included a handmade baby blanket among other items) to my stepson's girlfriends shower..(they live more than 5 hrs away and it was held at 7 on a Sun nite..so going wasn't an option !)..I sent it UPS on the Mon before the shower..it was delivered on Wed afternoon (shower was held at a friend of her's house..so that's where it was sent)..the shower was on June 27'th..(another gripe of mine.. shower held June 27..she's not due till Sept 29!)..it is now July 17'th and I still haven't heard if the gift was even received...never mind saying thanks!..now I realize that my stepson and the girl were leaving for a 11 day trip to Ireland on July 3...but shouldn't she have sent out thank you notes the week following the shower?..Ia lot of the invited guests were too far away and mailed gifts..have talked to 3 of them and not one has received a thank you...I sent her a birthday card on her bd (July 7) and mentioned in it that I had sent the gift, hoped that she liked it..to please let me know immediately if she hadn't gotten it..now she never calls here..and stepson only occasionally (both claim long long working hrs)..and we have been told that calling there will only reach their voice mails on their cell phones..but I don't think it's MY responsibility to ASK her to thank me...
This is the fourth time in as many months..I handmade baby blankets for one of my husband's employees and his wife, another for one of their salesmen, another for my stepdaughter..the employee and the salesman told my husband 'thanks'..but I feel that they should have written a thank you note and mailed it to both of us at home..and the stepdaughter (typically ungrateful girl)...never even said thanks!
Anyone still following...thanks....just had to vent...this was the last straw..and the last blanket I will crochet!
Lynn

 

[Blueeyes101817]

I was always told to write thank you cards when i was younger..i always hated it haha...now, i just do it because its the right thing to do..my brother whos 18 had to just write them and hated it ....but we usually do get them , at least some of the time here

 

[Disney Doll]

I agree that "thank you" notes are becoming a thing of the past, or they're done on a computer and mass produced.

I know, I know...you give a gift because you want to, not to receive a thank you. But I have stopped being quite so generous to some, due to their inability to be appreciative!

 

[CEDmom]

I can excuse not receiving one in situations where a quick phone call or even an e-mail will do but for something big like a wedding, graduation or shower I think it's inexcusable.

I'll be the first to say how much I dislike writing them but it's just one of those things that has to be done.

I so sorry you went to all that trouble and your thoughtfulness wasn't acknowledged.

 

[skuttle]

I still do them...I actually have a stack of them to send out from DS's birthday party (just waiting for stamps). I decided to be creative and make them...after the 3rd or 4th one I regretting that decision. But in finished them and handwrote an individual thank you from DS for each of his gifts.

We went to two other first birthday parties this summer...one sent a thank you, one didn't.

 

[Dan Murphy]

Yes, they are just plain good manners.

 

[beattyfamily]

Yes, they are becoming a thing of the past, unfortunately, but not in my house.

I think it's just another sign of the times. Me me me. Please don't take offense to my opinion.

 

[cati]

xx

 

[rcyannacci]

I still see a lot of thank you notes in my circle of friends. I know my mother drilled it into me at an early age. In fact, my DH and I were writing thank yous on the plane to WDW for the honeymoon. A prompt thank you shows true gratitude and organization.

Plus, isn't it fun to pull out stationary! It's like a relic from the past! Target has some great stationary, thank you notes, stickers, etc. I go nuts in that section!

 

[Jungle Skipper]

I think thank you notes are just the right thing to do...I do them, and personalize them too, I don't just do it because i have to, I want to. In fact I sent out thank you notes earlier this week to the Poly Concierge for all their help in planning the trip so far...good work deserves acknowledgement.

Jungle Josh

 

[buzzlady]

When my DSs were younger I would write out the thank you cards and have them at least print their name. Now DS11 has to write out his own and I will help DS8. There is no excuse not to receive a thank you.

 

[disney4us2002]

Okay, I am feeling better about the rsvp thing since it appears to be everyone that is experiencing this rather than just me but I have to say I'm more than appalled to read that wedding rsvp's are also going by the wayside. For God's sake, they even send a stamped envelope for your reply! Come on people....

Now, as for this topic....... I'm sure some will find this tacky, lol, but I did it anyway. It bugs me that thank you's are rarely sent (gosh, it seems they're rarely said either!!) so for the last two parties I threw I gave thank you notes as part of my gift basket! Now, I was hosting the parties (one baby and one bridal) and the two recipients are very good friends. I don't know that I'd give notecards to just anyone but I thought this was a good idea.

By the way, because I threw the parties & sent out the invitations, I had everyone's addresses and filled out the envelopes on the thank you's. The thank you's went out by the following weekend after both showers!

So, is that tacky?

Carla

 

[pirateofthecarolinas]

My DS10 had to write one today.

Lori

 

[Tuffcookie]

I taught oldest DS to always write thank you notes and I'm trying to instill that in youngst DS too. At the end of this school year the band boosters completely paid for a trip to Cedar Point for the high school and middle school band members. I made sure youngest DS wrote a thank you note to the president of the band boosters expressing his appreciation for the trip. Writing thank you notes shows CLASS. Sorry your homemade blankets were not acknowledged. There is no excuse for not writing a thank you note!

TC

 

[goofy4tink]

Sad sign of the times I guess. But, the rule in my house is...if the person giving you a gift gives it to you in person, a thank-you at that time is fine. But, if it is sent to you then a thank-you note goes out. Or if someone does something exceptionally nice for you a thank-you note goes out. I have family that has stopped gifting due to never getting a thank-you of any kind.

My dd's teacher actually had computer generated thank-you's all ready at Christmas time. Nothing personal in them at all. They came home with the kids on the last day of school before the vacation!!! I always give thank-you note cards to teachers as Christmas gifts and end of year gifts.

 

[BrerMom]

My method for writing thank yous, both for me and the kids, is that you are not allowed to use it or put it away until the thank you is written. It was a little self-imposed discipline for me that worked great with wedding presents, baby showers, etc.

Is it tacky to give thank you cards as a present? It depends on how it is done. I was originally impressed when DD received nice embossed T-yous from her grandparents until DMIL looked at me and said, "because she didn't write us a thank you for last year's Christmas presents." I didn't say anything, but I was thinking, "You didn't write a thank you to us, either!" and, mean mom that I am, I didn't make her write a thank you for those Christmas presents, either. If you are all opening presents together and you say thank you in person, I think that's fine.

Here's one for discussion: I don't usually send regular e-mails, they're more like letters sent electronically. I found out the hard way through my mom that my uncle doesn't consider an e-mail thank you a "real" thank you. If it were a one or two-liner e-mail, I'd probably agree, but a letter?

 

[Alicnwondrln]

I think you should always send thank you s
I had to growing up and my son just had his 5th bday we printed out thank yous and i wrote a small note in each on and made Shawn wirte his oen name.. I think that if you dont or cant whatever excuse it is say thanks then its not nice thing and you should teach your kids to say thanks they wont appreciate it and think that people should give me things.....and id me mad to if i were you

 

[Fire14]

Our thank yous were written and mailed the Mon. after our Fri. Wedding and only person who didn't get a thank you written because i screwed up was my OWN mother and we had both told my parents on numerous occasions Thank you in person for our gifts.