ARGH! I wanna scream...or cry...or...rant

[aurorasleeping]

It's a rant...but somewhere in here's a question...I think..
My BF, his best friend, Chris and are I going to DL on Tuesday (a day trip, we live in L.A.), It'll be my BF's and Chris's first trip, my second (last time was in '95, lol).
I'm super excited...but i'm the only one. I think Chris is mildly excited, but my BF is DEFINITLY not...and it's ruining it for me. I know he's not as disney-obessed as I am, and that's ok, I just wish he would at least make some attempt to hide his...annoyance. (I do tons of things with him that I don't particularly like...shouldn't he return the favor?) I love being at the Disney parks, but I know that if he's sulking and all day, it's gonna ruin it for me....I want him to enjoy the things I like...or at least not HATE them.

So the question is: I'm not at all familiar with Disneyland, is there anything special I could try, that might make him a little happier about the day? The hours are pretty short that day (10-8), so we don't even have to wake up at the crack of dawn...I was thinking maybe something fun at Downtown Disney after the parks? Or something in the parks? Anything *magical*?
What have other people done with friends/family members who didn't "get" the magic?

I'm sorry if this is a bit incoherrent, right now, I'm just so upset at him that I just wanna say "Forget it, I'd rather go by myself!"

Thanks in advance!!!

 

[mystic_path]

Well there will definately be things he will enjoy there. Put him on space mountain a few times, and find things he likes to nibble on in theme parks, and he will be happy as a cloud. Not only that, but let him pick something to do after the park closes, so his day doesnt feel wasted.

But I do understand where your coming from. It puts a damper on the whole day if hes in a mood. It doesnt make your day exciting. Just let him know how your feeling and if he doesnt want to go, then dont make him. He can do something else and catch up with you later at Down Town Disney, if hes really not into it. At least that way if thats what he wants to do, you and your friends (Even if its your bf's friend) can still go and have a blast. I've gone and done stuff with my bf's friends cause my boyfriend didnt want to go. Its always worked out best that way at times.

 

[spazzyjazzy]

Is there a way that maybe he shouldn't go? It would totally bite if your day were ruined because of one person.

 

[aurorasleeping]

Thanks for the great suggestions
I've actually mentioned more than once (sincerely) that if he doesn't want to go, he doesn't have to... I'd be fine just going with his friend, we get along very well and it would probably be alot more fun without my BF complaining all day.
However, he won't go for it. He's determined to go...not sure why though... I've tried to convince him that I REALLY am ok with him not going (I really honestly am)...but I think he's going because he think's It'll make me happy... arg....boys confuse me!

 

[mystic_path]

Yup relationships are confusing at times... He just needs to understand that this day means the world to you, and that he should take it a little bit more maturely if it means a lot for him to see you happy.

 

[MagicalMomAZ]

That's the one thing I count on DH for, even if he's not thrilled he enjoys seeing ME enjoying myself....I think that may be one of those things that come later in life tho.

Find out about some behind the scene tours, maybe that would give him some insight. The gallery above PotC has Walt's old apt's in the back, often they will show you if they can. There's tours set up (2, can't remember the names) also........this is what would interest my DH : Cryptic info about Walt or the park ...what's the inside scoop on this or that. You can search the internet for DL Trivia or secrets. DH doesn't buy into the whole Happiest Place on Earth (I do!) so I have to feed that jaded part of his brain from time to time.

Make it a game....who can find the most Hidden Mickeys in one day (search for ideas on net) & the loser buys lunch!

 

[Dukland]

They have the ESPN Zone in Downtown Disney. I know when we went the first year, dh and BIL made a point to go there.
I understand how you feel. If it gets too bad you can tell him that the Happiest Place on Earth only allows happy people there. If he's not on board, he shouldn't come.

Are you going to DCA, too? Because there are some wild rides there, if he likes that sort of thing.

 

[tmt martins]

Am I reading right that you live in L.A. and have only been once.

And your mad at him for not wanting to go.

You should be mad at yourself for not showing him all along how big of a fan you are.

He will be fine and if you need to park him in a corner somewhere and enjoy your day.

 

[Leofoenget]

Thanks for the great suggestions
I've actually mentioned more than once (sincerely) that if he doesn't want to go, he doesn't have to... I'd be fine just going with his friend, we get along very well and it would probably be alot more fun without my BF complaining all day.
However, he won't go for it. He's determined to go...not sure why though... I've tried to convince him that I REALLY am ok with him not going (I really honestly am)...but I think he's going because he think's It'll make me happy... arg....boys confuse me!

Seriously, tell him if he doesnt' change his attitude you won't go with him. Wny would you want to go with someone who does not want to be there and why would someone go if they didn't want to? I dont get it, unless he is the only one with a car....

 

[Zoemakes5]

Seriously, tell him if he doesnt' change his attitude you won't go with him.

I was going to say something just like this. I'd say "Look, sweetie, this is something I'm really excited about, it's something I've been saving up for forever and have wanted to do for a long time. I'd love for you to share it with me, but I do not want you to go unless you can put a lid on your negativity about this. It doesn't have to be pure magic for you, but I won't let you ruin the magic for me!" I'd imagine that will either get him to put a lid on it or make the choice to, at the very minimum, not be so negative.

 

[TheZue]

Is he mad his friend is going? It just seems like something else is probably bugging him if he's mad about it AND insisting on going.

But ya I agree with you telling him he can't come if he's going to be a big whiney baby the entire time. You only get to go to Disney kid free and young for a limited time; and you'll have plenty time to deal with an actual whiny baby in Disneyland later in life when you have your kids; and even then they are generally happy to be there...you shouldn't have to deal with that with your boyfriend on a trip that is supposed to be fun.

 

[amw]

My DH has always said he doesn't like Disney. He thinks it's a big money grab (he calls WDW the mouse that sucks your money). However, when he's at Disney, he always enjoys it -- he just won't admit it! AND, he's the first to suggest that we should go on another Disney trip with the girls. He's even the one who suggested DLR this time

I think the "big" boys don't want to admit to liking the magic. I was going to suggest what a previous poster said -- the ESPN zone to hang out in and play games. I think there's an arcade somewhere at DL - not sure if he's into that. Or go somewhere at DCA for drinks.

The first time I went to WDW with my DH we were childless, and I convinced him to go by agreeing to see his Miami Dolphins play. Maybe there's something he'd like to do that you can promise to agree to "IF there are no rumblings while in the park."

Sometimes guys don't get all the pre-planning excitement. Hopefully, he'll change his tune for you when you get to the parks. Especially if his friend is into it.

 

[Laralyn]

My boyfriend is not a big Disney fan (to put it mildly) so I know where you're coming from. He does his best to be supportive, and he's a really good sport. He even offered to go to WDW again this year (although I told him we could start alternating years between WDW and somewhere else).

One thing that is jarring if you don't love Disney is the crowds. It's pretty much impossible to go anywhere without having someone in your way, bumping into you, stopping in front of you, or yelling in your ear. That's especially true at Disneyland, which has much more narrow walkways and feels a lot more crowded than WDW. If your boyfriend is bothered by the sound of yelling/crying kids, the effect gets doubled. If he isn't used to walking or standing hours on end, then the effect gets quadrupled. You want him to have the best time possible so he'll want to go back again, right?

So my biggest piece of advice is to take it easy and find some spots where you can get out of the sun and the crowd, and have some quiet time. That can be during a long show (like the Hall of Presidents), or a ride on the riverboat, or just sitting in a quiet spot and chatting. In the middle of the day, consider going out to Downtown Disney for a snack and a cold drink. Find ways to get him out of the crowds and the noise, and off his feet, for at least a few minutes every hour.

Hope this helps!

 

[dizzyami]

When DH gets cranky I just buy him beer - turns everything around real quick!!!

 

[laui]

all he needs is a little bit of pixie dust.

take him straight to the indiana jones ride and he'll be beggin for more all day.

however i would advise you to tour fantasy land last


my husband used to be all about 'canada's wonderland this and canada's wonderland that' and finally when we went in 2003 (his first time and my third), he was hooked. he loved it so much, and had a blast on all the crazy fun rides with our kids. now we have a new daughter and he's so excited to take her on the dumbo ride.

 

[gnbuggy]

When DH gets cranky I just buy him beer - turns everything around real quick!!!

works every time for me too!! A couple of Pabst and all is good.

 

[agoofylover]

Let me ask this...is the friend "Chris" a guy or girl? Guys don't like to admit...but they do get jealous and insecure. He probably wouldn't want you having fun with a guy friend...without him present. Petty...but usually the case.

I just got back...and my DH wasn't showing pre-trip excitement at all. Once we got their he had fun...Thunder mountain railroad was one of his favorites!!
Let me just say he is a man's man...and he really had fun with our boys and our times out by ourself.

 

[mystic_path]

I have friends who went to disneyland last year for the honeymoon. Roberta really wanted to go to disneyland, but her husband Daryll really didnt want to go, but went cause he knew it would make his wife happy.

When they got back Daryll had the time of his life. He really really enjoyed himself. So maybe your boyfriend really will have a good time.

 

[aurorasleeping]

Thank you everyone, SO much! You are all so great (and great ideas to!!)
We went yesterday, and except for a couple of um...lets say... "tense" moments it all went very well. (we're buying AP's). I even got him to wear mickey ears!!!!
I think it really helped that we rode almost every single thing was open yesterday at DL and only waited more than 10 minutes, for one ride - Peter Pan's Flight. (Only used FastPass once - for indiana jones)
(Btw, someone asked...I've only been in LA since May, and didn't want to fight the summer time crowds at DL...before that I lived in Orlando . And it was my BF's idea for Chris(boy) to come along 'cause BF doesn't like alot of fast/crazy rides, but Chris loves them, and he wanted me to be able to ride them..so sweet )
Again, thank you ALL SOOO MUCH!

 

[laui]

you even got him to don mickey ears?!

that just says it all doesn't it

so glad you guys had a great time!