Any other DISers trying to concieve? Reread OP for the QOTD!

[kathybeany]

First of all... to everyone here in this thread. TTC is one of the most stressful things. I swear if you weren't actually planning it, it would happen in heartbeat.

I had a laproscopic surgery in feb of 2001 to remove grapefruit sized cysts on my ovaries. Dr almost cut off one because it was so entangled and was told I would never get pregnant without fertility medication. Christmas 2003 we had our BFP and in August 2004 our ds was born.

We're in the process of looking for a house, so once we move in and get settled we're going to TTC again. I'm on BC now to keep my cycle regular because without bc, I wouldn't even have a period. So we shall see what happens. We're hoping to be pregnant this time next year.

Losts of hugs and babydust for everyone!

 

[Minnesota!]

AllyJack ((((hugs)))) sounds like you have been down a rough road. I completely understand your frustration at comments from your mom. There is nothing I wouldn't do to be a mom....it has always been my dream. I might have missed it, but where are you in your IVF3 cycle? I have a few friends who have done IVF and have been very successful! I wish you all the best!! And you are not a downer. A good chunk of us have been through IF of some sort, and we are here to help each other through the highs, and lows!

As far as who knows we are TTC. Well, it has been no secret that I have wanted another baby since DS was about 6 weeks old (yes I said WEEKS!). I keep hedging the question with friends/family, though, because I hated the "are you pregnant yet". My best friend is the definition of fertile. Got pregnant with her daughters while on the pill and last November, she and her DH decided they wanted #3. She was already nearing O and actually thought she was past O. Well, 3 weeks later...a BFP. Little/no planning involved. I am happy for her, but because she doesn't understand having to TTC, it's hard to talk to her about it. So, in short, my SIL (also has IF problems) and DH know!! LOL. And of course, all you guys...

 

[mzspaz]

Busting out of lurking mode to join this thread because I can't talk to my friends,family, or co-workers about this stuff. Also, because I can relate to nearly everything posted on here.

I had to laugh about the comment about praying for the BC not to fail and now wishing to get PG. I've done the same thing!

I've also been worrying that maybe I am "past my prime".

And I hear my biological clock ticking LOUDLY!

I'm 32 and DH is 31 and I started about a year ago with "not not trying" and I went off the pill. I was finishing up my Master's degree and figured it would be a good time. I thought it would be relatively simple to get pregnant.

A year later and I don't think that way any more. Now we haven't been serious about it up to this point in that we haven't been doing the every other day "dance" and I haven't been charting. Just a lot of wishing, hoping, and praying.

My SIL has told me to chart, but I don't think that would work for me as my schedule is different every day so I never wake up at the same time.

Well, at least all of this trying is nice

Anyhow......that is my saga and it is comforting to see others going through the same thing. I was beginning to feel like I was the only one and starting to feel like a failure.

I guess the next step for me is to call my doctor and set up and apt.

 

[skuttle]

Hey skuttle, maybe we can go through this again together! DS turns 3 this Saturday and I think we are going to try this summer for #2. As I am 35 it should be a ride!

How funny, Sonya! DS will be 3 on July 2nd. Time flies, doesn't it?? Now that we have our house, I am more than ready to start trying again!

to AllyJack and everyone else who has had a long road. I hope y'all receive good news soon.

 

[AllyandJack]

I think back to the 10 years I paid $30./month for the birth control pills and I get mad.

I'm still on the birth control pills for the IVF. I'm really not ready to start shooting up the Lupron yet.

My doctor is funny....she tells me to just do the deed with DH for fun and let her get me pregnant. Works for me!

I haven't told anyone I'm doing #3 - well, except you guys here and DH! The pressure is too much to take. I'm all for honesty, but unless it happens in the very first month, telling people only causes grief. The advice alone is enough to drive you batty! By month #2, I was getting advice from when to do it (from my mother - ew!) to how to do it (from my friend) to how long to lay down after (hello, UTI!).

One piece of advice I have is not to waste $$ on those ovulation sticks. They are SO hard to decipher and I had an IUI cancelled because I couldn't read the darn things. The Clear Blue Easy Fertility Monitor is AMAZING. It's expensive, but you can use it over and over again to conceive future children. It's easy to use and simple to read and there is no mistaking whether you're getting a Peak reading - unlike with the stick where you have to determine "same as or darker than".

 

[vettechick99]

How long do they generally suggest being off of BC before TTC? We want to start trying in the fall...We are hoping for a due date in the summer since DH is a teacher. I'm thinking this month should be my last month of pills. My appt with my OB/GYN isn't until mid June and it's hard to catch her or a nurse on the phone for a non-emergency.

Skuttle, some doctors say you can start ASAP, others will say be off BCP for a few months- it's just their opinion. You are fertile as soon as you stop BCP (that's why missing just one pill is so risky), so it's up to you if you want to get off early or not.

One piece of advice I have is not to waste $$ on those ovulation sticks. They are SO hard to decipher and I had an IUI cancelled because I couldn't read the darn things. The Clear Blue Easy Fertility Monitor is AMAZING. It's expensive, but you can use it over and over again to conceive future children. It's easy to use and simple to read and there is no mistaking whether you're getting a Peak reading - unlike with the stick where you have to determine "same as or darker than".

AllyandJack, so you really think the CBEFM is worth it? I know they cost over $200 in stores, but you can get them on ebay for about $80-100. I stopped charting because knowing my cycle was making me batty - won't the CBEFM do the same thing?

 

[AllyandJack]

AllyandJack, so you really think the CBEFM is worth it? I know they cost over $200 in stores, but you can get them on ebay for about $80-100. I stopped charting because knowing my cycle was making me batty - won't the CBEFM do the same thing?

With charting, you usually don't know you've ovulated until after. That's no help. So, that'll drive you crazy - doing it all the time and waiting for the temperature to rise. If you ovulate late that month, you'll be burnt out by the time the big day comes around. Knowing after the fact isn't helping since conception is most likely to occur if you have sex 1-3 days BEFORE ovulation.

The monitor will tell you when ovulation is coming. It'll usually start asking you for a sample on CD6 (it will adjust itself once it learns you). It'll give you High readings for a few days and then, when it detects an LH surge indicating ovulation is imminent, it will give you a Peak. Sometimes, I'll get a Peak for 2 days and then ovulate. Sometimes, I get a Peak for a day and then ovulate. I don't temp until I get the Peak reading. That way, I can pinpoint the day without having to get up at an absurd hour on the weekend to temp at the same time every day. You don't have to examine it to see if it's "same as or darker than". Sometimes the lines are broken and part of it looks "darker than" and part of it doesn't. You just stick it in the machine and when it shows the egg, you know it's time to get to work!

 

[mickeyboat]

Skuttle, some doctors say you can start ASAP, others will say be off BCP for a few months- it's just their opinion. You are fertile as soon as you stop BCP (that's why missing just one pill is so risky), so it's up to you if you want to get off early or not.

I second that! Also, as for giving a more accurate due date, ultrasounds are VERY accurate, even from 6 weeks PG, at determining due date. After trying for so long for Hannah, we weren't about to go on BC pills again. Although we were trying to be careful (condoms), we weren't as vigilant as we should have been, and I conceived Emily before I even had another period after giving birth to Hannah. (I was also breast feeding, so don't believe that myth either). They gave me a due date when I had an ultrasound at 7 weeks, and she was born 2 days before it.

Denae

 

[KimR]

I am trying to conceive baby #4 and I'm not very hopeful considering my age. I have gotten pg twice in the past 2 years but lost both, unfortunately. I'm sure it was due to my age. I will find out early next week if this month was successful, but I'm not hopeful - darn aging ovaries

One thing I'd like to mention that I found out: If you are TTC you should NOT take melatonin. It can inhibit ovulation and is actually being studied as a potential contraceptive!

 

[beckmrk04]

Hi everyone- so glad to see that people are joining!!

and baby pixie dust to everyone.

I am so happy that other people can relate to these stories, and we can all be here to support and encourage each other, as well as pick people's brains when we have a question.

Reread the OP for the QOTD (Question of the Day)!

 

[AllyandJack]

One thing I'd like to mention that I found out: If you are TTC you should NOT take melatonin. It can inhibit ovulation and is actually being studied as a potential contraceptive!

Xanax, too. It can cause you to produce breast milk, which can inhibit ovulation. Some prescription anti-ulcer drugs can do this, too.

So, best not to take anything at all.

And, don't let DH take testosterone. There are actually some urologists out there that will give testosterone to help increase levels, but it's been shown to actually cause azoospermia and it's known as "male birth control".

 

[AllyandJack]

Answer to QOTD: Oh, yes. I have to hold my tongue from saying, "When DH's sperm start swimming...." I usually just say, "Hopefully, someday." Isn't it funny how people think it's OK to pry like that? Would you ever walk up to someone and ask them something like, "So....when do you plan to buy a house instead of renting that apartment?" or "So....when do you plan to get a job where you make more money?" Yet, when someone decides to have kids is up for conversation.

 

[vettechick99]

With charting, you usually don't know you've ovulated until after. That's no help. So, that'll drive you crazy - doing it all the time and waiting for the temperature to rise. If you ovulate late that month, you'll be burnt out by the time the big day comes around. Knowing after the fact isn't helping since conception is most likely to occur if you have sex 1-3 days BEFORE ovulation.

The monitor will tell you when ovulation is coming. It'll usually start asking you for a sample on CD6 (it will adjust itself once it learns you). It'll give you High readings for a few days and then, when it detects an LH surge indicating ovulation is imminent, it will give you a Peak. Sometimes, I'll get a Peak for 2 days and then ovulate. Sometimes, I get a Peak for a day and then ovulate. I don't temp until I get the Peak reading. That way, I can pinpoint the day without having to get up at an absurd hour on the weekend to temp at the same time every day. You don't have to examine it to see if it's "same as or darker than". Sometimes the lines are broken and part of it looks "darker than" and part of it doesn't. You just stick it in the machine and when it shows the egg, you know it's time to get to work!

Thanks Carla. The last few months we've been having sex every other day (or every day) the week leading up to ovulation - but so far no luck. I guess if I don't get pg this month, I'll get one.

Oh, and to all the almost-TTC'rs, be sure you are on a pre-natal vitamin. You should be on it at least 3 months before you conceive!!! Actually, every woman of child-bearing age should take one. You never know when you will get pregnant, and if you start taking it then, you're already late!

 

[beckmrk04]

QOTD: My family knows that Mark and I want kids, so they haven't been asking- it's the complete strangers or acquaintances that are like, "So, when are you having kids?" Or "Are you pg yet?"

I always say, "Oh, someday" or "We're working on it" but I have wanted to start ttc for the past YEAR and every time someone asks me I'm reminded that my plans haven't exactly worked out.

I know they mean well, though, and most people are just excited for us to have a kid.

 

[beckmrk04]

Oh, and to all the almost-TTC'rs, be sure you are on a pre-natal vitamin. You should be on it at least 3 months before you conceive!!! Actually, every woman of child-bearing age should take one. You never know when you will get pregnant, and if you start taking it then, you're already late!

Very true- however, I bought over the counter prenatals that made me VOMIT like crazy. Unfortunately it took a few days for me to realize what was making me sick. My doc said that my one-a-day was fine for a while, and then when I was really ready to start ttc, my ob gave me some samples of Rx prenatals to try, and I found one that does not make me sick!!

Long story short, make sure you're taking something with at least 400 mcg folic acid, and then if prenatals make you sick, ask your doc for a prescription- there are lots of different kinds!!

 

[KimR]

One tip I do have (a little plug for charting temps!): if you have been trying for several months without success, charting will let you know if you have a luteal phase defect. This was one of my problems and had I not been charting I never would have known because my cycles were of normal length, which is actually common with LPD. LPD can be corrected...I am currently on Letrozole (similar to clomid but without the side effects) to correct the problem.

Another benefit of charting is that it can sometimes give you a very early indication of pregnancy.

 

[ImarriedGrumpy]

In answer to the QOTD, it all depends on who's asking me. I don't know why, but it doesn't bother me at all when some people ask, and it drives me nuts when others ask the exact same thing! My dad's been asking me this question for years - even before I'd met DH! I think people mostly ask us because we are older and if we're thinking about it, we better get moving. DH turns 40 in Oct., and I've already told him that I thought getting pregnant would be a great 40th birthday present! We get the question even more now that DH's closest friend has a daughter and my closest friend is pregnant. Oh, and my younger brother's 1st child will be born this summer and my baby sister has been TTC for a couple years.

 

[Minnesota!]

Pea - n- me - WOW on your generosity on giving your embryo up for adoption. What a hard call...but I bet it feels so good to know that someone who has tried for so so so long, will be blessed with a child...just as you were blessed 8.5 years ago. Truly a wonderful thing you did..

QOTD: Well, as it turned out in my (in law) family, we all had kids 1 year apart...my son being the last. So, I am kind of off the hook, because everyone is waiting for the one who had #1 grandchild in the family to have another. And, my brother and his wife just found out last week that they are expecting #3....so in my immediate family, I am off the hook until end of December or so...then they will start saying it's my turn! LOL.. Something better happen in these next 7 months!

I also had a Luteal Phase Defect - which is why I was put on Clomid in July 03. My LP has turned around, though, since I had my son, and it is about 14 days...which is textbook!!! I do have low progesterone, though (cause of my other m/c's) and I have a Rx filled an in my purse for the event of a BFP...I will start taking immediately..

 

[Syrreal]

Sorry if this sounds a little whiny...it're fresh in mind

I am having mixed signals from my mom actually. Some days she comes at me with the are you pregnant line and then goes on and on about baing sure to do everything right and follow my dr instructions....oh and the ever popular you can always stand to lose a little more weight.

Then, after they sprung a summer trip on me (which I am not happy about as I have had to drop a job opportunity for- this right after my mom gave me the "when are you going to get a job and make some money" line- I haven'e even graduated grad shcool yet!) anyway before I get too OT--> she tells me yesterday if i am sure that I want to try now and possibly be sick on the plane and on the trip. What the heck!

The mixed messages have been going on for a while now (they came one out of the blue one day) and are progressively getting worse. I think that all of a sudden my mom has decided that I am trying to "pull away" from my family or might be "growing up" in her eyes or something. Who knows! Just a little frustrating.

Again....sorry for the vent but it just happened....

 

[helenabear]

Pea n Me, that was so awesome you gave your ebmryo up for adoption. Very generous of you!

AllyandJack, wow, that is a lot to have gone through!

I admit I love seeing so many more people here in the same boat. It somehow makes me feel a little less alone out there.

As for the question of the day. I think for the most part people have stopped asking us. They were big at asking right before we were getting married and right after for a year or so. Then they just hushed up about it. A few friends are always good at asking that kind of a thing but for the most part we are left alone about it. I presume people are thinking it since I quit my job last summer, but no one really asks anymore. Kind of nice actually