Anxiety around upcoming trip

[wendlle]

I have been having MAJOR anxiety about my upcoming trip.
I've never been away for 5 weeks before and my parents are aging - they aren't sick but it is something the last year that has been on my mind a lot.
I can't shake the feelings that something bad is going to happen while I am away - and I am already "home sick" and haven't even left yet!

The kids are beyond excited to go, I'm also having a hard time knowing I am taking them out of school for 5 weeks which is half a term - the teachers aren't too concerned, which in a way further adds to my anxiety. I've organised some apps and books for while we are gone - they are 6 and 9 so not missing out on exams or anything like that - it's also being away from their friends and their Grandparents who they see every single day.

MY parents have a phone but not a smart phone - they just can't use technology at all, I'm thinking of leaving one of the ipads at home with them though so we can face time instead of just talking on the phone and will teach them how to use it before we leave.

Has anyone been away for this long before and had this kind of anxiety?? I cry just about every day.

 

[Kooks and Bay Bay]

Man that's tough.
I probably wouldn't want to go on a trip that is that long regardless of anxiety.
How old are your parents if you don't mind me asking?
When is your trip? Wondering if there's time to set things in place to ease your mind.
Could you have family or friends check in on your parents?
There are also agencies that could look in on them or a home health aid that could come for a couple hours a day.
My parents are in their late 70's/early 80's and I've been struggling with anxiety about them lately.
My dad recently had surgery and I've been helping him and have been very sleep deprived. He's definitely getting around better so I ended up buying a call button off Amazon and made him promise that if he does need me to push it so I can get better sleep instead of being so alert all night.

And for your anxiety I'd consider asking your Dr if a shorter term medication might be useful for the trip so you can feel like you can enjoy it more.
Also there certainly have been times in the past that I've been anxious about something but then when I'm actively engaged in something I don't have time or space in my brain to also be as worried as I was.

 

[wendlle]

My dad is 78 and my mum is 68, my entire family live in the same town as myself and my family - so I know I am being "silly" and they will be fine. They can take care of themselves and my Aunt talks to them most days.
This is stemming from me, my mind has been out of control lately just with anxiety. I really have no idea how to control it.

My trip begins on April 29th

 

[Kooks and Bay Bay]

My dad is 78 and my mum is 68, my entire family live in the same town as myself and my family - so I know I am being "silly" and they will be fine. They can take care of themselves and my Aunt talks to them most days.
This is stemming from me, my mind has been out of control lately just with anxiety. I really have no idea how to control it.

My trip begins on April 29th

Are you open to medications to help?
I just wonder if something short term may help.
You want to be able to enjoy the trip instead of wishing it was over.

 

[wendlle]

Are you open to medications to help?
I just wonder if something short term may help.
You want to be able to enjoy the trip instead of wishing it was over.

Yes, I actually booked a doctor appointment this week to see my GP.
I started taking Ashwagandha last week on a recommendation from someone at work - it helped them to relax, but took a few weeks to start working for them.
The closer the date gets the more anxious I become.

I know I'm going, I've already downed around $30K so no turning back now.

 

[Kooks and Bay Bay]

Yes, I actually booked a doctor appointment this week to see my GP.
I started taking Ashwagandha last week on a recommendation from someone at work - it helped them to relax, but took a few weeks to start working for them.
The closer the date gets the more anxious I become.

I know I'm going, I've already downed around $30K so no turning back now.

I'm all for whatever works for someone but its hard to compare the subtle natural supplement (that may or may not be high quality and potent enough) to a prescription medication.

Once you're on the trip as long as you're keeping busy the anxiety may not have as much of a chance to build up too.

Good luck and have fun!

 

[wendlle]

Yes that’s why I’m also going to the GP I’m not one for natural stuff so want to talk to thr doctor.

 

[quietly]

Hey fellow anxious person! And maybe fellow Australian? I’m sorry you’re feeling this way - I know it can feel so overwhelming. I want to reassure you that you’re going to a safe and happy space so please take that out of your worry bucket. I know the technology might be new to your parents but with the help of your aunt who you said visits regularly, I really feel like through FaceTime you’ll feel connected to those loved ones at home, particularly if you try and schedule specific times for everyone to chat about their days. Getting to hear about your travels will give them something lovely to look forward to each day (or whatever schedule works for you) and you can even show them around sometimes and let them be part of the magic! Also if you want to some characters will record video messages for you so you can send them back to your loved ones which could be a lot of fun for your aunt to show them. I know it might feel like a long way and a big commitment, but, plans can always be changed if something goes wrong, just because you go, doesn’t mean you have to stay, and I know your parents will want you to have a happy trip. Make a plan to stay connected, talk to your GP about getting some help with anxiety before hand (if you’re an Aussie you can ask for a mental health plan to talk through your worries with a professional before you go) but most of all - lean on your network. Ask your family members to check in regularly and send you a message after so you know they’ve been taken care of. Ask the family to assist them with technology. You can stay connected while still having a great trip

 

[wendlle]

Hey fellow anxious person! And maybe fellow Australian? I’m sorry you’re feeling this way - I know it can feel so overwhelming. I want to reassure you that you’re going to a safe and happy space so please take that out of your worry bucket. I know the technology might be new to your parents but with the help of your aunt who you said visits regularly, I really feel like through FaceTime you’ll feel connected to those loved ones at home, particularly if you try and schedule specific times for everyone to chat about their days. Getting to hear about your travels will give them something lovely to look forward to each day (or whatever schedule works for you) and you can even show them around sometimes and let them be part of the magic! Also if you want to some characters will record video messages for you so you can send them back to your loved ones which could be a lot of fun for your aunt to show them. I know it might feel like a long way and a big commitment, but, plans can always be changed if something goes wrong, just because you go, doesn’t mean you have to stay, and I know your parents will want you to have a happy trip. Make a plan to stay connected, talk to your GP about getting some help with anxiety before hand (if you’re an Aussie you can ask for a mental health plan to talk through your worries with a professional before you go) but most of all - lean on your network. Ask your family members to check in regularly and send you a message after so you know they’ve been taken care of. Ask the family to assist them with technology. You can stay connected while still having a great trip

hello! Yes fellow Aussie here.
Thank you for your kind words, these thoughts keep me up at night for weeks now and I'm sure the lack of sleep isn't helping either - just makes it worse everyday.

I realised that I can't use the ipad for my parents as they don't have the internet!! So we will settle for the phone calls and when my Aunt goes to visit we will do facetime.

In my mind deep down I know that if something was to happen I could be home in a day, we would be able to leave almost immediately in case of an emergency and I have travel insurance, BUT for some reason this isn't translating properly and 2mins later I'm back to the same worries.
I've never experienced this before, I've never had anxiety so this is all new to me and quite scary.

 

[mommasita]

I could imagine feeling that way if I were leaving that long. I’ve done it with my Mum in the past, before the days of internet and obviously FaceTime. We did speak daily.

Having said that, I hope you have an absolutely wonderful trip. Life is about what we make it out to be. If the teachers are ok with this, and kids won’t be behind, amazinggggg!

Hopefully your Dr can offer you something for the anxiety.

 

[C.Witch]

Good for you for speaking with your Doctor - anxiety like this this can definitely impact your quality of life.

A short-term suggestion to help you get through this trip - what is your parent's living situation? Do they have neighbours you can trust to keep an eye out for comings/goings, perhaps even check in a few times a week, alternating with your aunt?

 

[wendlle]

Good for you for speaking with your Doctor - anxiety like this this can definitely impact your quality of life.

A short-term suggestion to help you get through this trip - what is your parent's living situation? Do they have neighbours you can trust to keep an eye out for comings/goings, perhaps even check in a few times a week, alternating with your aunt?

thank you. Doctor visit is today after work.
My Parents are very mobile and active, walking daily etc so the neighbours are used to seeing them and I'll be able to call them anytime I want, I made sure the prepaid plan I get while in the USA has international calls.
Honestly, it's just me. I'm just not able to think rationally right now.

It isn't just this issue i'm having a few others as well, everything is making me anxious or cry!