Advice - Work Issue

[supercarrie]

I have worked for my company (approximately 100 employees) for 15 months. I initially started out in quite an admin-driven support role, supporting the recruitment function. Over the past year, I have taken on a lot more responsibility, and now essentially run recruiting at my company (deal with hiring decisions, strategy, etc). I officially report into the HR Manager but often deal directly with the senior team and owners of the company.

Most of the employees, and all of the senior management team, bar one, have been extremely supportive of this move. They respect my new responsibilities and have no problem working with me. (As far as I know, as my reviews have been very positive!)

One of the senior team members, however, simply refuses to work with me. He will attempt to discuss things with the HR Manager instead of me, and ignores her when she tells him that I am handling recruiting now, so he needs to talk to me about it. He refuses to copy me in on relevant e-mails, etc. In fact, with discussing things, it is almost as though I do not exist. In addition, when he isn’t ignoring me, he makes quite a few “jokes” insinuating that I do not take my job seriously and that I am immature (joking about how I found some of our candidates physically attractive and that is why I supported hiring them when I tried to discuss them in a hiring discussion, amongst other things).

I have mentioned it to my boss previously, and she chalked it up to just being cultural differences. (He is from Eastern Europe.) I really think there is more to it than that, and it is affecting my ability to do my job properly. I do not really expect it to change, as he is so senior, so am just looking for any advice/coping strategies! This is my first job of any real responsibility following graduation, and imagine this won’t be the first time I come up against someone like this.

 

[Tuffcookie]

OP, First of all

Maybe you could request a meeting between your supervisors, yourself, and this other employee. He needs to be told more firmly to get with the program!

Good luck!

TC

 

[abdmom]

One of the senior team members, however, simply refuses to work with me. He will attempt to discuss things with the HR Manager instead of me, and ignores her when she tells him that I am handling recruiting now, so he needs to talk to me about it. He refuses to copy me in on relevant e-mails, etc. In fact, with discussing things, it is almost as though I do not exist. In addition, when he isn’t ignoring me, he makes quite a few “jokes” insinuating that I do not take my job seriously and that I am immature (joking about how I found some of our candidates physically attractive and that is why I supported hiring them when I tried to discuss them in a hiring discussion, amongst other things).

Some older people, and I'm over 40 and count myself one of them, get used to doing things a certain way. It's difficult for them to change. His brain is probably programmed to discussing/emailing HR decisions with the HR manager only. It can be difficult to remember that you exist - it's probably not a high priority in his brain. I wouldn't take offense, although I can see that it would be maddening.

If you're not used to joking, I can see how suggesting that you would like to hire someone because they're good looking could be upsetting to you. He's probably just trying to needle you. I doubt that he's serious. This is how some people build relationships. I would just respond with a "Ha, Ha!", and blow it off with a smile.

There are many different personalities out there! It can be difficult to work with everyone. Good luck

 

[supercarrie]

Some older people, and I'm over 40 and count myself one of them, get used to doing things a certain way. It's difficult for them to change. His brain is probably programmed to discussing/emailing HR decisions with the HR manager only. It can be difficult to remember that you exist - it's probably not a high priority in his brain. I wouldn't take offense, although I can see that it would be maddening.

If you're not used to joking, I can see how suggesting that you would like to hire someone because they're good looking could be upsetting to you. He's probably just trying to needle you. I doubt that he's serious. This is how some people build relationships. I would just respond with a "Ha, Ha!", and blow it off with a smile.

There are many different personalities out there! It can be difficult to work with everyone. Good luck

I suppose I should add that I am quite sensitive to the joking because of the lack of respect. The other senior mgmt often joke with me about candidates and they could have said the exact same thing, but it comes across much differently when he says things.

 

[lovesmurfs]

You need better support from your manager. Your manager should not discuss hiring with him, in any way -- and should bring you into any discussions he tries to have with her, or forward any emails she receives from him regarding something that you should do.

Your manager promoted you to these extra duties, and there is a process in place, regardless of culture or other "reasons" for not following it. She also needs to copy his supervisor on a response reminding him about the process that is in place.

Best wishes.

 

[Tuffcookie]

I am 56 and have had a lot bosses here in the detective bureau over the years. Several have been younger than me. I don't care how old this gentleman is, the fact that he has already been told to discuss issues with the OP, indicates he does not respect her! Age should not be an excuse!

TC

 

[Disney Doll]

You need better support from your manager. Your manager should not discuss hiring with him, in any way -- and should bring you into any discussions he tries to have with her, or forward any emails she receives from him regarding something that you should do.

Your manager promoted you to these extra duties, and there is a process in place, regardless of culture or other "reasons" for not following it. She also needs to copy his supervisor on a response reminding him about the process that is in place.

Best wishes.

I would agree with you. I think you should approach your Manager and tell her that since Senior Manager Idiot does not include you in discussions or emails that are petinent to your area, and you have found that sometimes his exclusion impacts your ability to do your job, that you would appreciate it if your Manager forwarded you any pertinent emials from Senior Manager Idiot and also that you would prefer that your Manager refer Senior Manager Idiot to you when he is looking for something that falls under your responsibilties.

 

[JKLLady]

Carrie,
Everyone who said that your boss needs to include you are right on! I can relate to this from the HR Mgr point of view; my CEO for the last 5 years of my career was Eastern European also, and felt that it was beneath him to speak to my assistant. He felt that I should handle everything myself. I told him that there was no way I planned on handling everything myself, that my staff was outstanding and that I had complete confidence in their abilities to do their jobs. I just kind of shoved them down his throat, so to speak, and brought my assistant to everything so that he got used to seeing her all the time.
Fortunately, I was able to retire two years ago and no longer have to put up with the fool, and many good employees have also jumped ship. He hasn't changed much, but forcing him to deal with my subordinates did help. Try to get your HR Mgr to do the same.

 

[dis-happy]

Maybe the HR Manager can by your ally and forward you all the pertinent emails you aren't receiving from this guy. At least you'd know what you need in order to do your job.

 

[supercarrie]

Thanks - she is pretty good about forwarding me on information, but hasn't been very good at actually standing up to him for me.

I'll have a more serious chat with her and see if anything comes of it. She isn't the most "forceful" person and prefers to avoid conflict, so I am not sure she will be as supportive as I'd like, but we'll see.