A Lobster walks into a bar.

[ashjohnson80]

And sits down and the bartender says, "What can I get for you" and he says....


"A Bud light".


Ha Ha Ha.

 

[Michie]

 

[ashjohnson80]

what's camel colored that lives in the desert and sometimes people ride on it and it doesn't drink a lot of water?





a camel.


ha ha ha.

 

[Cool-Beans]

Help! I don't get it.

 

[Briarmom]

You are hilarious.

 

[Cool-Beans]

what's camel colored that lives in the desert and sometimes people ride on it and it doesn't drink a lot of water?





a camel.


ha ha ha.

tee-hee.

 

[Mike.Wazowski]

 

[ashjohnson80]

knock knock

who's there

a skittle

yummy. chomp.

 

[Michie]

 

[ashjohnson80]

Quotations.

Ever wonder "why" some "people" use them the wrong "way"? Like this "word" seems like it would "be" better with a "" around it.

Who wants a ba"nan"a. well there you go.

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

I don't get these jokes. Why are they so funny?

TOV

 

[ashjohnson80]

I don't get these jokes. Why are they so funny?

TOV

They aren't funny. But it's the best I can do. Right now.

 

[isyne4u]

Ash what ya been drinking tonight???? Have you been stealing from Shug???

got any more bad jokes!!!

 

[ashjohnson80]

ummm. ok.

what did the dog say when he wanted a biscuit?



















woof.

 

[DawnCt1]

A horse walks into a bar. The bartenders asks; "Why the long face?"

 

[ashjohnson80]

Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy.

Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money.

"I can't take your money," said the first guy. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said the second guy. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"

 

[Alice's Mom]

A horse walks into a bar. The bartenders asks; "Why the long face?"

 

[ashjohnson80]

Phil had just joined a club after his friend had recommended it (being a member for quite some time).

They were sitting at the bar having their beers when someone yelled "21" and there was a small uproar of laughter. A few minutes later someone else yelled "34" and another roar of laughter rose up. Phil, confused about this asked his friend "Why is everyone laughing at the numbers being called out" His friend said, well we've been telling the same jokes for so many years that we just numbered them all and if you want to tell a joke you just call out a number"

Phil nodded and said "Can I try?" His friend nodded and Phil called out "121" and everyone in the club roared with laughter and it didn't die down for at least another 15 minutes after. "Why did everyone laugh so hard at that joke?" Phil asked. His friend said with a small chuckle "We haven't heard that one before."

 

[ChuckB]

forgot which board this was on