17 yr old goes permanently blind and deaf from avoidant restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID)

[Searc]

I see, so you resort to a strawman argument instead of answering the actual question I asked.
That;s OK, your obvious attempt at deflection is answer enough. You clearly know parents are responsible for their childen's healthcare you just don't want to say so. Worried you might be accused of not having empathy perhaps

Nope. Saying parents are responsible for their children's healthcare is VERY different vs saying parents are responsible for their children's eating disorders. Parents are responsible for their children's healthcare until they are 18.

A year ago, when both my now-adult children were healthy and my greatest worry was what I was making for dinner, I probably would have said the same thing you're saying. Life has a way of humbling you and showing you aren't quite as superior as you think you are.

I won't be taking your bait today, so you'll have to fish somewhere else.

 

[Hikergirl]

Nope. Saying parents are responsible for their children's healthcare is VERY different vs saying parents are responsible for their children's eating disorders. Parents are responsible for their children's healthcare until they are 18.

A year ago, when both my now-adult children were healthy and my greatest worry was what I was making for dinner, I probably would have said the same thing you're saying. Life has a way of humbling you and showing you aren't quite as superior as you think you are.

I won't be taking your bait today, so you'll have to fish somewhere else.

My bait? You were the one who chose to quote my question and "answer" something I didn't ask to try to make your point. It didn't work, just accept that. It's clear here who is playing games.

As far as feeling superior, if thinking parents are responsible for the care of their children, including health and mental health care makes one "superior" in your eyes, then so be it.
Where I come from that is called being a responsible parent.

 

[Newcastle]

My adult son has autism and we have struggled with food issues his entire life. At one point in his early 20s, he became severely malnourished, could not keep any food down, lost most of his hair, developed horrible skin rashes, lost a great deal of his muscle mass, had marked difficulty walking...the list goes on and on. It took us 3 YEARS to convince a medical professional to give him a feeding tube as most doctors felt that it was not warranted and that he would not tolerate it due to his autism (i.e. they thought he would repeatedly pull the feeding tube out). During those three years his quality of life suffered tremendously and he spent weeks at a time in hospital where they would feed him through an NG tube until he was somewhat stronger and then they would send him home. Someone finally listened and he is now thriving on regular tube feeds with some foods taken orally that he enjoys . I can say from experience that it is not always the fault of the parents in these situations and that unfortunately, it can take an unbelievable amount of patience and advocacy to get the medical community to listen.

 

[Moliphino]

Parents are not responsible for their children's eating disorders, with the rare exceptions of abuse. Full stop.

No, but they are responsible for getting their children medical and/or mental health care to treat their eating disorders.

 

[Searc]

No, but they are responsible for getting their children medical and/or mental health care to treat their eating disorders.

Only until they turn 18.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Nope. Saying parents are responsible for their children's healthcare is VERY different vs saying parents are responsible for their children's eating disorders. Parents are responsible for their children's healthcare until they are 18.

A year ago, when both my now-adult children were healthy and my greatest worry was what I was making for dinner, I probably would have said the same thing you're saying. Life has a way of humbling you and showing you aren't quite as superior as you think you are.

I won't be taking your bait today, so you'll have to fish somewhere else.

Only until they turn 18.

I am confused.

 

[DLgal]

Only until they turn 18.

No. Sorry. Legally, sure, they can't force an over 18 to get medical care. Doesn't mean you stop trying to help your child or taking responsibility for their health and well being. I needed mental health care at age 19. I went to my mom and dad. I could have found a doctor on my own, but guess what...I was still under their medical insurance as a college student, so they had a hand in my medical care until I got married 3 years later.

My own sons are both autistic and I suspect we will retain legal guardianship of them as adults and will be very involved in their health care as long as it is needed. You don't simply stop being a parent when your kids turn 18 and abdicate all responsibility for their health and well being.

This story would be very different if we heard from the parents that they tried everything over the years, begged doctors to help their son, etc. Instead, we get a whole lot of "the child had a normal BMI, so everything must be fine" from all the adults in his life who should have done better by him.

 

[Searc]

No. Sorry. Legally, sure, they can't force an over 18 to get medical care. Doesn't mean you stop trying to help your child or taking responsibility for their health and well being. I needed mental health care at age 19. I went to my mom and dad. I could have found a doctor on my own, but guess what...I was still under their medical insurance as a college student, so they had a hand in my medical care until I got married 3 years later.

My own sons are both autistic and I suspect we will retain legal guardianship of them as adults and will be very involved in their health care as long as it is needed. You don't simply stop being a parent when your kids turn 18 and abdicate all responsibility for their health and well being.

This story would be very different if we heard from the parents that they tried everything over the years, begged doctors to help their son, etc. Instead, we get a whole lot of "the child had a normal BMI, so everything must be fine" from all the adults in his life who should have done better by him.

You can try and help your over 18 child all you want, but if they don't want the help, there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.

 

[VandVsmama]

When I saw this story in the news, I thought, "I wonder if that kid is on the autism spectrum." I know someone whose younger son (autistic) has ALWAYS had challenges getting in proper nutrition. It has NOT been due to lack of trying on behalf of his parents. His parents took him to lots of health care providers from an early age in order to get help for it, including occupational therapists. The kid had a pretty limited diet, but with lots of regular hard work every single day along with lots of intensive help from health care providers, the kid started to be willing to eat a few more things other than his originally very limited diet.

It's easy as arm chair quarterbacks for all of us to sit here and blame the parents. But none of us know the other side of the story. It's probably a lot more complicated than we all realize.

 

[Hikergirl]

When I saw this story in the news, I thought, "I wonder if that kid is on the autism spectrum." I know someone whose younger son (autistic) has ALWAYS had challenges getting in proper nutrition. It has NOT been due to lack of trying on behalf of his parents. His parents took him to lots of health care providers from an early age in order to get help for it, including occupational therapists. The kid had a pretty limited diet, but with lots of regular hard work every single day along with lots of intensive help from health care providers, the kid started to be willing to eat a few more things other than his originally very limited diet.

It's easy as arm chair quarterbacks for all of us to sit here and blame the parents. But none of us know the other side of the story. It's probably a lot more complicated than we all realize.

From the article in the OP
"The 17-year-old lived off a daily portion of chips, crisps, white bread and processed meat for around a decade."

That would mean the boy was 7. For 10 years, even after his diagnosis of his eating disorder he still lived off this stuff daily?
I can see no way a parent did all that was necessary to treat his eating disorder and at the same time allowed him to continue to eat only this way.
This wasn't just a picky eater, this was a child suffering from a diagnosed eating disorder. That food was in his home so he could eat it daily for a decade. It didn't magically appear there, the parents allowed him to eat that way at home.