GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes
If it’s still here tomorrow… I may ignore it again
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2007
Chapter 3: Integration
Part 1: Thats the second biggest arro
errrr
Disney Park Ive even seen
Now that wed successfully infiltrated the land of Mouse and set up a plausible cover story, the next objective was to thoroughly blend in. Wed need to integrate ourselves in with the rest of the rabble. Dissolve into the crowd follow the expected routine of a run of the mill guest. That being: act clueless and be sure to completely and blatantly screw-up several times along the way
while still being able (somehow or other) to successfully complete the mission (even if through totally unrealistic means). Preferably that completion would be prior to the second commercial break and most definitely by the time the epilog rolls around
Oh yah
And loving it!
OK, so how best to accomplish that task on our first full day on property?
Why, a visit to Epcot of course!
Good idea 99!
Perfect cover Well show up and appear to be just another group of underwhelmed tourists scratching their heads and attempting to discern just how it is that things like Leaving a Legacy or a quick tour of the Stave Church could possibly be listed as attractions on the park map.
Ahh yes the old include every bit of available sideshow fluff on the park map attractions list trick
and I fell for it.
Not that there arent some very fine attractions at the park closest to our resort. Some of them very high in quality as well its just that (and Im talkin about Future World here) they could surely use a few more of em round here. They could also do with replacing several that are there as well.
But Im getting way ahead of myself here.
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
How to Succeed in the Spy Business
Without Really Trying (2#25)
Sunday morning arrived and as usual when were traveling, I was up first. Not early mind you, but still first (we decided that we werent going to be in a great rush this morning). Being first up though meant that I was charged with setting our plan of conformity and apparent poor planning into action. Now, how best to accomplish that task (aside from not being in a rush that is)? I know Ill walk a long roundabout path just to get a cup of bad coffee. Thatll do it. Ill look just like a tourist.
As Ive said before, POR is one beautiful resort; a lush, visual feast around every corner
So I set out to take all that lushness in for myself.
Now before starting on this trek I set down with a couple of maps of Port Orleans and of WDW in general to see if I couldnt work out the best routes for getting to my objectives of the day. As for getting down to the dining hall from our spot out in the bayou so as to retrieving a bit of bad coffee well there is no direct route from Point-X-Ray to Point-Zed, so I just followed the closest one available.
Which can best be described as: meandering.
A bit time consuming, yes, but still quite pleasant.
Besides Im on vacation, Right?
OK, so now why would I be making that hike just to retrieve coffee that I know aint all that good? Because my wife needs to be spoiled and spoiled often and by somebody that knows how. Im not a big drinker of the bitter brew, but she is. And even though Nesca-crap, aint particularly good (by any stretch of the imagination) a fair amount of proper half-n-half (which is available) does make it palatable. Having a mug of the stuff waiting on her once she got out of the shower was exactly what she needed so at the time it constituted a perfectly valid objective for me.
Were the boys a bit younger, Id have probably brought them back some Hot Chocolate as well, but being as both of the them were plenty old enough to fend for themselves (and chose to sleep in until the last possible second), I decided that doing without would also be just exactly what they were in need of at that moment in time.
This however was one of the last few times Id be making that walk on this trip.
Once everyone was up and ready, did we jump on the bus and race to make it to a rope drop? Nope we did the very un-touristy thing of hopping into the car and driving back up to the main entrance to get some breakfast
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
The Impossible Mission (4#01)
Objective for the day: Take down as many of Epcot: Future Worlds actual attractions as possible. Specifically the big three: Test Track, Mission Space and Soarin (and anything else that strikes our fancy while were up that way).
Spoiler alert! Not gonna happen.
Wed have accomplished as much if our objectives had been to see Horizons or Cranium Command.
Could it have been accomplished in the first place? Maybe, if wed started earlier, skipped breakfast, had gotten a bit more moderation from Mother Nature and most importantly, if nothing important had broken down. We didnt have a bad day (lets be quite clear on that point). We just found it impossible to complete the mission as intended on this day anyway.
So lets get back to the story (such as it is).
After grabbing a bit of grub (and after starting off later then was prudent), we again broke convention and completely avoided the complimentary transportation service. Instead our entourage made the drive directly over to the Experimental Prototype Community of the Future in our own personal limo: Tamaras Altima. This also had the advantages of no one needing to give up a seat for anyone else or having to wait for the driver to fold away half of the remaining seats in order to load a couple of mobility scooters. As I was saying a bit earlier, I took a good look at a couple maps that morning and determined that the drive from Point-R to Point-E was a whole lot simpler then the walk from Point-X-Ray to Point-Zulu had been. An easy left out of POR, an immediate right to merge onto Epcot Center Dr. followed moments later by a gentle exit ramp and Boom!
Youre there
Ive been using the busses for years with no real complaint. But that journey was so easy and painless that in one fell swoop I was convinced that given an option Id rarely ever be taking a Disney bus again. The rest of my driving experience across the week would only serve to reinforce this conviction.
Transportation discussions aside the real point of the story was that wed arrived at the second biggest Disney Park in the land. Really. The list goes like this (for the time being at least)
Hong Kong Disneyland only around 60 acres
(even including the newish Toy Story PlayLand)
Walt Disney Studios Paris - 62 acres
Disneys California Adventure - 67 acres
(moving out of last place with Carsland now compete)
The Original: Disneyland - 85 acres
Tokyo DisneySea - 122 acres
Disneyland Paris - 126 acres
Tokyo Disneyland - 126 acres
The Magic Kingdom - 142 acres
Disneys Hollywood Studios - 154 acres
(yep DHS is a smidgen larger than the MK)
Then comes
Epcot at a whopping 300 acres
(it really is two separate parks ya know)
But of course the lions share of relative size (and for good reason) went into
Disneys Animal Kingdom - 500 acres
(and still fewer attraction then even Epcot)
OK, semi-interesting-tidbit section of the post concluded.
Be thankful that I didnt turn it into a full blown Bonus Feature.
Now, having not arrived at Epcot as early as we shoulda (wed missed rope drop by near an hour), we did end up being about eleven rows back in the Journey lot. Not really all that much farther to walk then from Epcots rather remote bus pavilions (well had we not by pure chance also been sent nearly to the end of the row that is). But after a little stretch of the legs we were passing right by the ubiquitous long morning line at SSE
Well come back to that one. There were bigger fish to fry.
A quick left a hard right some brilliant handling maneuvers through the chicane of other guests and we had FPs for
The new and improved Test Track. Yah!
That returned at 2:45!
Booooo!
Dang, that hour lost was a painful set back to the schedule. I know that is always the case, but harmony in the house is still more important than my immediate desires for expediency (but Ill be correcting that early start issue soon enough).
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
The Hot Line (3#24)
We could get more passes in a couple of hours but for now it was stand-by lines or nothing. Being on the east side of the park already (and because, drat the luck, Universe of Energy was closed), it made the most sense to tackle Mission Space.
One of my all-time favorites (Tamara not so much)
The wait there can vary, but weve had good luck in the past. Mostly because we ride the Orange side and that scares a lot of folks including my wife. Who am I kidding; she hates the thing regardless of color. We talked her into trying it way back when there was no such thing as a Green less intense training experience. She did it, survived it, and aint never gonna do it again. However, being the sweetest proper Southrn Belle Ive yet to encounter, she also insists that the boys should go ahead and ride. She honestly doesnt mind waiting (I married well very well indeed).
The standby time here was listed at 20 minutes. Not bad (not true but not bad).
So it the old False Standby Queue Wait Time trick
and I fell for that one too.
Having bought the deception, we picked up our orange passport cards and hit the queue. No sooner than we do that, the wait time must have been altered upward because the CMs immediately opened up a chunk of serpentine queue that Id never seen before. And it was all outside without nary a hint of shade. In addition, it was here that we first notice the fact that nature decided to apologize for yesterdays dreadful torrents of rain by replacing said precipitation with todays ridiculously oppressive envelopment of heat. This fact would plague us the rest of the day. Im from the South I know heat I understand humidity and the effects of the heat index, but this stuff was particularly nasty. It made for one very hot line indeed. After 20-min or so of wilting and withering, we finally made it inside the show building
** S-i-g-h **
Fifteen more and we were loaded into our command module though, so all was right with the world.
Or would that be: all was right with Mars?
After a graceful and flawless landing on the Martian polar icecap, we met Tamara out in the control and command training center and moved on (after secretly noting the more important technical details and snapping a few covert pictures of the work stations and system schematics for our clandestine handlers of course).
The next thing encountered was these guys
Epcots own: Jaminators
Go on, give it a click. They really are pretty good.
As previously noted, it was hotter then blazes out there on the concrete. But then again, were all pretty much enthralled most things musical. Especially that which even smacks of the traditions behind marching bands or drum and bugle corps (heck, I officially proposed to my wife just before taking her out to see a drum and bugle corps competition true story part of it anyway). So, being odd in that way, how could we resist this creative bit of impromptu entertainment?
Once they were done however, the acquisition of air-conditioning had become a moral imperative. A bee line was made for Inoventions-East (nearest port in the storm so to speak). Both of the Inoventians plazas are really in need of updating. Seriously folks. Theres been no appreciable change on the east side since the last time we were in the park (back in 2010). But the boys did find something to keep their attention for a moment of ten
Video games imagine that.
Ehhh fine by mom and dad. We found an absolutely lovely bench to sit down on. Moderation and an understanding of ones physical limits (along with a high tolerance to pain acquired over long years of working and raising kids) are still why I can out endure most youngens especially in a Disney park; a fact that will become apparent later on.
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
Ice Station Siegfried (5#13)
Having a bit of time to kill yet, we figured that a spot of refreshment (and possibly even a challenge) were in order. The obvious destination for that
Weve been fans of this little diversion sense it was nothing more than a temporary micro-attraction added better than a decade ago as an afterthought to help combat the Central Florida heat
So starting from the time my adult son was a mere five years-old until now weve been quite aware of the excellent entertainment value to be had watching the uninitiated discover the joys of Beverly. And from time to time, maybe even indulging in a bit of the rancid dreck ourselves. Why? Because well because ummmm were ID-10-Ts? Thatd about explain it. Oddly though it would turn out on this particular trip into the ice station, thered be no Beverly challenge
I was amazed. Id never seen more then maybe one flavor out of order at any one time and had never known it to be the Italian Stuff. The boys were a little disappointed by this (very little to be sure), but so long as unlimited free cups of my favorite African Ginger Ale were ripe for the picking I was again quite content.
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
Strike While the Agent is Hot (2#02)
Thrust quenched, and bodies considerably cooled down, it was time to take on the challenge of another stand-by queue. The wait at Soarin was about two hours and we still couldnt get passes yet, so the decision got to be easy time to experience a Disney (and for that matter National) Icon
Space Ship Earth
Of course this queue has a major design flaw. There aint but six feet of it thats not out in the heat. By this time of day however, the wait was considerably less than in the early morning. By evening its often almost zero, but being as it loads continuously the twelve-ish minutes or so that we weaved back and forth in and out of a little bit of shade wasnt sooooo bad. In general Ive always enjoyed Space Ship Earth. It a good long and fairly entertaining attraction and thus affords ones aching dogs a nice break. But I gotta say that Im not really a big fan of the video game addition to the end of the ride. Honestly (and with no malice toward Dame Judi Dench), I think its a bit silly
They could have done so much more to add entertainment value to the lengthy descent back down the core of the sphere to the loading station. Say something like replacing the infinity mirrors surrounding that corridor with one continuous LED display. Here, lets blue-sky this one for a moment. They could build it as though it were a tunnel wrapping 360 degrees around the omni-movers and running the length of the shaft. Something a bit like the Freemont Street Experience in Los Vegas
but even more Dis-tacular. Considering the fabulous imagery offered up by Disneys Imagineers using nothing more than a sheet of water or even the Castle at MK as a canvas (or the massive geodesic sphere currently protecting us from the oppressive heat for that matter). Given their talents, can you just imagine the wondrous and potentially even hypnotic visuals that several hundred feet of continuous unending hi-def LED screen could offer up during that gentle inclined backward decent down to terra firma?
Boggles the mind.
Oh well back to Earth
and the heat
There is good news though. According to our clocks (the ones in our pockets pretending to be reliable telephones), we were finally allowed to grab up a few more Fast Passes. Time to make a move and attack quickly. But where?
Such a question obviously that would be here
Who could resist Fast Passes for Living with the
No, no, no, no right building, wrong ride.
I mean Soarin of course (and some more air-condition in the Land Pavilion to boot).
So thats where we headed and thats what we got. Needless to say, the return time on the passes was well into the evening. And I do mean: well into it, but we did now have two complete sets of Fast Passes tucked away in our wallets.
Then an interesting thing then occurred right about here on the time line. One of the escalators that hauls everybody back up out of the Land Pavilions basement was under repair. To compensate, the CMs were directing folks to exit by the emergency doors just beside the Soarin queue entrance. A chance to see behind the scenes and maybe learn more secrets that I can turn over to our superiors. It was here that we realized something that normally one doesnt think about. We werent in the basement. The main entrance to this pavilion is on the second floor. No wonder youre always huffing and puffing once you get up that ramp leading up to the pavilions doors.
Its the old fake basement in the basement trick
Just one of those little details that you dont normally think about as you traverse Future World. I wish theyd allow folks too use this lower exit all the time. It was a much easier walk to be sure and it sped up the traffic flow exponentially. As of right now, there aint a lot to be seen along this path way. At least not until you get back around to the front, but it was considerable better on the leg bones.
That pleasant detour led us directly into the area of the Imagination Pavilion.
And more to the point
directly to that pavilions single best feature
its exterior.
Thats pretty much all I intended to partake of this day so far as this location goes. Well see if I change my minds latter on. As for the current master plan, well, lunch seemed to be looming high on the agenda. And we even had plans to ease our hunger pangs in a spot that was going to be an entirely new experience.
For us anyway.
Next up: Ship of Spies (1#27-28)
Don't let Kathy read this chapter. But the jumping fountains are the best part.
