PTA Bullying

Discussion in 'Community Board' started by BreeBree, Oct 2, 2012.

  1. BreeBree

    BreeBree Earning My Ears

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    Oct 1, 2012
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    Oh, I'm perfectly willing to let my child go over to a house that has a nanny supervising! I completely understand that lifestyle choice and I know these women would not trust their children with just anyone. I have had a hard time fitting in with these moms. I grew up in a fairly wealthy family, but my parents chose to send me to public school to avoid things like this, so I'm new to private school entirely. My husband on the other hand, went to private schools his entire life, including the one my son attends now. I figured my husband's "alumni status" would help curb this problem, but I guess not :confused3 Perhaps the whole play date issue is laziness on my part, but with a two year old having intense temper tantrums, the whole thing just seems overwhelming at the moment. I will however definitely take your suggestion and talk to the teacher. I'm sure she'll have some good suggestions :) And Hannathy, I do not know who the "scholarship kids" are, but as far as I can tell, there aren't any in my child's class. Trust me, I'd much rather befriend those moms and have my son befriend those children than the ones in the PTA.
     
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  3. padams

    padams <font color=darkorchid>Hey, I've never posted on a

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    Try some playdates. Have your mother in law take the two year old for you during the playdate. I know it's an effort but you need to reach out and help your son make friends. Soon enough, those playdates will become sleep overs and your child will want to be doing them. Once you help establish some friendships, your child will get invited to the other houses and you won't have to host all the playdates. Nanny families usually want the playdates at their house because after all, what's the point of the nanny if the child is isn't there.;) I bet my kids had a child at our house once for every three times, they went to other houses.

    Hang in there.:hug:
     
  4. BreeBree

    BreeBree Earning My Ears

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    I just wanted to post a quick little update and say thank you to everyone for lifting my spirits about the whole situation, I truly appreciate it! I went into the PTA meeting with a better attitude this time and came out with a much better result! We chose two heads for each classroom Halloween party and they decided to let me be one! Hopefully now I'll be able to show them what I'm made of. I'm meeting with the other mom sometime this week and she's going to bring her son along so our kids can play together while we discuss what to do. The other mom has an older child so she'll be able to walk me through the whole thing and let me know how high their expectations are. I can't wait to get started! Once again, thank you for all of the positive comments! :grouphug:
     
  5. jujube

    jujube DIS Veteran

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    Thanks for the update and I'm very happy that the meeting went well!
     
  6. JED1977

    JED1977 Earning My Ears

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    I know this is an old post but I think it is worth considering that if your child is in K, especially in a private school that likely is either K-8 or K-12 you are like a junior staff member. Just like when you start a new job you need to use the first year to learn the ropes and determine who the players are before you are going to be offered committee chair positions. Many moms have been on the PTA and running different fundraisers for many years, in that time they have gained experience and tried a variety of things both successful and unsuccessful. Take the time to show you are a team player, volunteer, ask questions, find mommy mentors and learn the cultural norms before you offer too many ideas. Respect the experience of the senior members of the group. Before you suggest a change ask why something is done a certain way, there might be a reason (or you might find out that a fundraiser is so and so's baby and they started it and suggesting major changes might be stepping on her toes). No one likes when they have worked hard at something for years and someone who hasn't yet proven themselves comes in and starts talking about everything that should be changed. Take your first year on the PTA to listen and get to know the group, pick a couple of committees that interest you and join them. Once you establish yourself as a reliable team player you will have more opportunities to be a leader. This is mistake many young professionals make in their career and it is a mistake new moms make at the PTA too. Some of the attitude about age that you are getting may be that the older moms have already figured this out via their career and you are likely early in that process. In a couple of years you will likely have the opportunity to mentor other new young moms as an established member of the group.
     
  7. Tinker'n'Fun

    Tinker'n'Fun <font color=purple>"apple", peaches, "pumpkin pie"

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    I know the poster who resurrected the thread noted it, but this is ZOMBIE thread. I usually get sucked in and caught this one!
     
  8. mjkacmom

    mjkacmom DIS Veteran

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    What the heck is going on?
     
  9. FlightlessDuck

    FlightlessDuck Pluto's personal nose scratcher

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    I think most zombie threads occur due to someone googling a topic and finding a DisBoards thread close to the top.
     

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