I have two small children and I have recently found myself just doing things myself if we run into poor service. We wait a reasonable amount of time for the wait staff to address our needs, but if the server has disappeared, I take matters within my own hands (within reason- I don't go into the kitchen). However, we were seated at a restaurant the other day and they were supposed to give us a high chair. The hostess seemed to have forgotten this detail and left us standing there holding our one year old while she proceeded to seat other customers. So, since no other wait staff was around, I went to the front of the restaurant and carried a high chair back to our table myself. The manager came by later and apologized saying he saw me carrying the high chair and addressed it with the hostess. So, this has me thinking- Is it ok to get an extra napkin/spoon/etc. if they are visible at a nearby wait station? What about refilling coffee or water glasses if the pitchers are visible? Now, I only mean if the wait sataff has disappeared/isn't helpful after a reasonable amount of time- not just to help oneself whenever. With two young children, our window of good behavior is limited and I don't want to waste it waiting for the extra spoon to arrive!