Mom in hospice...said my final goodbye..update post 65...shes in Heaven now :(

Discussion in 'Community Board' started by hlane, Nov 22, 2009.

  1. hlane

    hlane <font color=purple>I find it very offensive that I

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2004
    Messages:
    991
    I'm not sure why I am posting this...I guess I just need to get it out, I am hurting so much.

    My Mom has been fighting breast cancer & angiosarcoma for over 12 years now. She was diagnosed when I was 19 years old. Shes fought so hard for her life....I've never seen such a strong person.
    She was readmitted to an inpt hospice facility yesterday. Last night about 6:30pm my Dad called for us to come see her & say our goodbyes. She was the most coherent she has been in weeks, maybe months. I got to spend some time alone with her as well.
    She said shes tired & doesn't want to hurt anymore, she's ready to go home & see her mom. She said my grandma has been talking to her & they are waiting on her to join them in Heaven.
    I told her I understood, shes fought a long, hard battle and it was ok for her to go, I would keep the family together & we would all take care of our Dad.
    Once we all said our goodbyes they came in and sedated her, at her request she will remain that way, asleep, until she goes.
    They said it was between God & the patient how long that will take but no more that a couple days at most. I left at midnight last night she was sleeping peacefully and still breathing.
    I know this isn't the end, that we'll all be together again one day but I am going to miss her terribly until that day comes.
    Its so strange, part of me is a basket case but the other part of me feels like I'm on a mission, in the zone, doing what I need to do to get me & the rest of my family through this.
    I'm scared to lose her but I don't want to be selfish...if she's at peace with going I am letting her go :sad1::sad1::sad1:
     
  2. Avatar

    Google AdSense Guest Advertisement


    to hide this advert.
  3. clovergirl5

    clovergirl5 <font color=red>♥<font color=green>Christmas is no

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    1,168
    :sad1::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:Im so sorry. May the lord be with you at this sad time. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.:hug::hug:
     
  4. C.Ann

    C.Ann <font color=green>We'll remember when...<br><font

    Joined:
    May 13, 2001
    Messages:
    33,193
    I'm so very sorry to hear this, but it's good that you have a peaceful acceptance..

    The days and weeks ahead will be tough, so please take care of yourself and take the time to grieve in whatever manner is best for you..:hug:
     
  5. Nette

    Nette DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    May 8, 2003
    Messages:
    2,181
    :hug:

    I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I went through the same thing last weekend, and my father passed on Tuesday morning. PM if you need to talk.
     
  6. chisnpeke

    chisnpeke <font color=blue>Got the blues on purple tag night

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2007
    Messages:
    10,024
    I'm so very sorry. :hug:
     
  7. MIGrandma

    MIGrandma Lives in the middle-of-the-mitten.

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2009
    Messages:
    6,368
    I'm tearing up just reading what you are going through. :hug:

    On one hand I'm so glad you were able to spend some time with your Mom, and that she was coherant so you could talk with her. But on the other hand, I'm sure it was so very hard on you, and her as well.

    I'm glad you have family to help you get through this, and you will. It will be hard (I lost my Dad almost 2 years ago - Alzheimer's) but hold on to the memories. That is the best part. :hug:
     
  8. disneyfanforever

    disneyfanforever DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2001
    Messages:
    1,339
    Your mom sounds like an incredible lady. I am so sorry.:sad1:
     
  9. disneygals

    disneygals <font color=purple>Call me "galbabies"</font><br><

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2000
    Messages:
    1,778
    there are no words...:hug:
     
  10. Kit'smommy

    Kit'smommy Luck favors the prepared, darling.

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2008
    Messages:
    751
    I am very sorry. Your family with be in my thoughts and prayers...


    :grouphug:
     
  11. Robinrs

    Robinrs DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 1999
    Messages:
    38,401
    :hug:

    I only wish I didn't know your pain but I do... all too well.

    Hugs to you, honey. :flower3:
     
  12. Briarmom

    Briarmom Bessie Robindale<br><font color=b26b70>Larry's bee

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2005
    Messages:
    13,811
    I know what you are going through, and I am so very sorry.:hug:
     
  13. luvmy2sams

    luvmy2sams <font color=deeppink>Proud Mommy<br><font color=00

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2000
    Messages:
    3,787
  14. DebbieB

    DebbieB DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 1999
    Messages:
    47,404
    I'm so sorry. I lost my mom to breast cancer 4 years ago. She died at home and unfortunately we didn't have that "goodbye moment" while she was still coherant and I still regret it.

    Don't be afraid to reach out for help if you need it. My experience was like yours, we were in kind of a "zone" during the funeral and were able to get through it. But afterwards is when it really hits you hard. The memories of the end fade and then you really start missing the person they were during the good times.
     
  15. luvmy3

    luvmy3 <font color=green>When I drink I find its easier t

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2008
    Messages:
    20,052
    :hug: I'm so sorry, my thoughts are with you and your family.
     
  16. Lovely2CU

    Lovely2CU DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2003
    Messages:
    1,001
    I'm so sorry, both my parents are gone so I know how difficult and heartbreaking this time is for you. :(
     
  17. Dan Murphy

    Dan Murphy We are family.

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2000
    Messages:
    63,918
    Very sorry to read this, hlane. Yours and mom's beliefs will carry you through these tough days. God bless, God speed. Prayers are with you and your family. :hug:

    And also with you, Nette. :hug:
     
  18. Disneylover79

    Disneylover79 <font color=darkorchid>I'm a cheap date!<br><font

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2007
    Messages:
    3,017
  19. JerseyJanice

    JerseyJanice RIP, Max!

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 1999
    Messages:
    6,951
  20. Kitty 34

    Kitty 34 Hums in her sleep

    Joined:
    Feb 16, 2000
    Messages:
    120,182
    I am so sorry. :sad1: :hug:

    She sounds like a wonderful person.
     
  21. RitaZ.

    RitaZ. <font color=purple>Move on don't hesitate<br><font

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2000
    Messages:
    10,250
    I know what you're going through right now.:hug: It's extremely painful to see your loved one, especially your mom, go through so much pain and agony. There is some relief in knowing that their pain is about to cease. It may sound strange to some, but it's what I experienced when my dad was near death.

    Stay strong. :hug::hug:
     

Share This Page