I booked ressie, friend backed out!#$%^&*(+_

[MouseketeerOvaHere]

First of all I want to say as everyone else I am sorry this happened to you.But if I may offer a little bit of a different view?
I just want to say, you mentioned that trips have always been booked by you and she always came through. As awful as this is, maybe something is really wrong financially. Take a breather and then just talk to her, find out what the deal is. I think that you did this because there is a certain amount of trust, friendship and a history between you.
Do what you have to do, add up you losses and if she can't pay you in full, maybe a payment plan to cover all your losses and have the agreement in writing ( you never know if she does try to pull a fast one, court would be next and you need your proof). I just don't think you would have floated her for so much if you didn't trust her to some extent and take it from someone who has been there, maybe she has a really good reason why she suddenly can't go.
Please don't be angry, I just wanted to give you some perpective though as others have said the situation is awful.

Couldn't have said it better myself. The economy is sh@t right now, gas has jumped close to a dollar since this time last year, food prices are up,foreclosures are a dime a dozen, airlines are going backrupt and if this lady is having financal trouble, I'm sure a vacation is the last of her worries. Not saying that she doesn't care about causing you distress and possibly ruining a friendship, cause I'm sure she is very embarrassed and upset that she is having to bail on you. Take our advice, sit down and talk with her and see what the deal is. Of course, even after it is said and done you may be stuck in a rut still but at least you know that you tried to come to a conclusion as to why things are the way the are. I'm very sorry that you are in this position. It sucks. Personally, I would go ahead and treat this as if she isn't going to be able to hold her end of the deal up and change the disney rev's (call to see what they can do to help you) and call the airline to see what can be done. Even though the tickets say nonrefundable they have the ultimate discretion and may be willing to work something out for you to receive a credit or sell them to be transferred.

Good luck to you and take this as a lesson learned. We've all tried to do good just to be burned.

 

[ThruTheEyesOfMyChild]

The problem with the upgrade option was that she bought the airline tickets through Disney - this would make this much more harder to do if it is possible at all.

Yes, I did purchase the tix thru WDW Travel Company...however...I have the AirTran confirmation number, because I got it to get seat asssignments. So maybe it wouldnt be too much trouble to do the upgrade thing if I had too! I will wait it out a little while longer, I still have a windo to play with here...deadline for paying off package isn't until July 6th. If my friend has not come thru by June 20th...I will start the wheels in motion to trying to upgrade on flights, then refunding, then paying off balance on modified ressie for DD & me. Sounds like a plan...right!? Then why do I still have such a sinking feeling in my gut? Probably becuz I could loose a friendship over this I guess! Wish Tink would show up and sprinkle a little pixie dust for me!!!!

 

[skier_pete]

Be careful trying that upgrade trick. Just because one airline lets you do it doesn't mean they all would. Talk to them first, maybe not telling them what you plan to do, but ask "So if I upgrade it a refundable fare, would I still get the full refund if canceled, or only the difference?" Get it in writing too is the best way to be sure before you do it. Ask for a copy of the policy.

SkierPete

 

[ThruTheEyesOfMyChild]

Be careful trying that upgrade trick. Just because one airline lets you do it doesn't mean they all would. Talk to them first, maybe not telling them what you plan to do, but ask "So if I upgrade it a refundable fare, would I still get the full refund if canceled, or only the difference?" Get it in writing too is the best way to be sure before you do it. Ask for a copy of the policy.

SkierPete

Hey SkierPete....I guess "it's a small world afterall"...we will be flying out the same day, same airport, same resorts,(hopefully for me & DD)!

 

[Reginak]

First, talk to your friend - I know that you said that she is hiding from you right now but give her a chance. Try leaving a message with a mutual friend whose call she would answer or leaving a message on her machine explaining that you are not upset but would like to try to work everything out. I am sure that she feels awful and is deeply embarrassed or she wouldn't be trying to hide.

Second, when you do call AirTran either be honest and explain that you are going to get stuck with the bill; or, better yet, explain that two of the people on your reservation may not be able to make the trip and ask how much it would cost to upgrade those tickets to nonrefundable, then upgrade and later get the refund.

It has only been a couple of days since you first posted; give your friend a little more time before you act.

Regina

 

[aripantaloon]

That's a shame. I think I'd talk to your friend to first find out what's going on that caused her to cancel. I'd be understanding, but also point out to her that you are not out small change here. See what she says. She may be more than willing to pay you back with time, but just didn't have the guts to talk to you about it yet.

Do your research before upgrading to refundable tickets. You don't want to be out any more money.

I guess in the future, for joint trips with anyone, I'd insist on the $ upfront before booking, just to be on the safe side. I hope she comes through and doesn't leave you holding the bag, so-to-speak.

 

[ThruTheEyesOfMyChild]

Well....here I am, more than 1 month later...and still not pne penny from her! YEP!!! See the stamp...right across my forehead...BOO BOO, THE FOOL!!!! We have discusse dit a few times, and she has said to me..."oh yea, I have it marked on my calendar, it's worked into my budget, i know how much is owed and when"....NOTHING STILL!

Her daughter (my adopted-like daughter, my DD's BFF) just had a birthday 2 weeks ago. I made her a photo album with about 50 pictures of the girls together over the past 4 years. Of course I made my DD a matching one. Well, the last photo was going to be the BIG SURPRISE ANNOUNCEMENT for the girls (the photo is shown below). Her mom loved the idea and was so excited that I would do that (I created it in Photoshop). I havent seen her to give her the gift. It is still sitting at my house. I cant reach her mom...I am sure it is avoidance at this point.

The final balance is due on July 6th. I have a feeling I will be out the $800 for their flights. I can modify the ressie for DD and me....but still really ticks me off!

 

[maxiesmom]

I'm so sorry. I really hope your friend comes thru for you. It would be such a shame.

 

[Disney Debbie]

I don't know if you've ever heard of Dave Ramsey - but this is what he'd call "stupid tax". It's the tax we pay for being "stoopid". It's a hard lesson to learn - but one you've learned well I bet! There's a reason your "friend" has bad credit - irresponsiblity. If she doesn't care any more then this about leaving you in the lurch - do you think she cares about paying her bills on time?

Don't get me wrong - I'm not calling you stupid - I've paid MORE then my share of stupid tax! You will more then likely be stuck paying the bill for this - and you'll never do something like that again! Just let it go, learn your lesson and forgive yourself. Don't hold it against the daughter - and try to forgive the mother - but I'd never trust her again.

BTW - the page you did is AWESOME! Photo shop the friend out and do a card or something for your DD with it - don't let it go to waste!

 

[WillCAD]

Yup, avoidance.

Next time you see your friend, whenever that might be, tell her, "I need $XX by July 6, or Disney will cancel your reservation and you will still owe the $800 non-refundable airfare."

Don't put yourself in the middle at all - it's all her.

I'm terribly sorry if your friend has hit hard financial times and is unable to pony up due to some unavoidable tragedy like a death in the family, health-care costs, broken vehicle or home, or losing a job. But no matter what terrible thing has happened to make her stiff you for an $800 non-refundable airfare bill, she still owes that money and must make good on it.

Something like this happened to me in 2000, when my friends told me, "Yeah, we'll go to Disney with you! Book it!" So I booked a hotel, and they both cancelled out a couple of weeks later and acted like they had never heard of Disney. Well, I was still able to use the hotel myself, I just paid more per night than I would have if I knew I was going solo. I still got a good bargain - $99 a night for a two-bedroom unit at Parc Corniche - but I could have spent a lot less if I had not booked the 2br unit. Lesson learned - I will never again book ANYTHING that has the words "non-refundable" on it, except airfare. And I always book with Southwest, which allows me to re-schedule without a change fee, so even if disaster strikes, I won't lose my airfare.

 

[Reginak]

Maybe she is waiting for a stimilus check?

Regina

 

[murphy t]

Any chance you could take just her daughter with you? Hopefully you will get the money for the airline tickets so that is already a cost the mom has to eat
so she would just have to buy park tickets, have the kids save up their own spending money..... Then your daughter would have her friend with her.
Good luck Murphy

 

[MsPlutoNJ]

I completely feel your pain.

I went to Disney last year by myself. So this year, my cousin, right after I book my trip for October (in March), says, "I told you I want to go." So I call up the next day and book her with me. A week later, I tell her that she should put some money down for Disney and she gives me $100. Looking back now, and knowing her the way I do, I should have put it towards the flight, but...I didn't. Any way, fastforward to last week and I ask her if she is still going? (Mind you she hasn't given me any money and I've paid off my part of it.) To which she says, "All I think about is Disney $$$, I don't think I can afford it." Now I honestly don't care about going by myself. It was great last year, but, I now have to change everything, hotel, food ressies and of course I have to add a spa treatment. When it came to telling her about the money, I told her showed owed me the balance of the flight. ($217 - $100 = $117.) Actually, not only is she my cousin but she's my roommate. So if she does not pay me the balance, I'll make her life miserable. Just kidding...sort of.

I hope pays you back the money. Even if it's a little at a time and after your trip, maybe, just maybe, that would save your friendship.

Good luck. And no matter what, enjoy Disney with your daughter.

 

[lunalibre]

We've planned trips with friends twice (different friends), who ended up backing out on us.

The first time it happened, we had booked a condo to go skiing with friends. Luckily we were coming from different cities, so we had different airfare booked. We had bought trip insurance on the condo, but it didn't help. Our friends cancelled because the DH had ear infections and couldn't fly. Our trip insurance would let us cancel, but we had to cancel the *whole package*. IOW, all of us would have to cancel the trip. Obviously we still wanted to go. We ended up eating the cost of the full condo ourselves. Gulp. We tried to do the right thing, our friends didn't want to have to bail on us, so...yes, we were out some extra money, but the friendship was still good.

The second time it happened, we had again booked a condo to go skiing with friends (different friends). We had booked our own airfare, but when I booked the condo (and trip insurance!), I specifically asked what would happen if the other couple had to back out. As long as it was for legitimate reasons (health problems, death in the family, etc.), the other couple could cancel their portion for a refund, and yet my family would still be able to go at no additional cost to us. Boy, was it a good thing we did this! The DW tore her ACL during a post-Thanksgiving touch football game two months before the trip. We felt really bad that they had to cancel, but at least we were able to go on the trip ourselves. The friendship is still good.

Actually, that was the last time we tried to plan a trip with anyone else. We got too spooked about what might happen. It's been a few years now, so we'd be willing to try it again, but definitely with ground rules:

- Everyone books and pays for their own airfare.
- Trip cancellation insurance must be bought that covers the cost of anyone having to back out, but yet the remaining participants can still go for no extra cost.
- All money must be paid up front.

Okay, wait a minute -- I lied. We did plan a trip with someone else (smacks forehead). Dear Family Friend (DFF) came with us to Disneyworld last year! However, adding her was easy. She paid for her own airfare, we added her to our room reservation, then she paid us the extra adult fee for the room. It truly cost us nothing to add her to our reservation except for extra space in the room. If she had had to cancel, it wouldn't have changed our plans at all. We hope to all go to Disney together again in 2010. [Sigh. That's so VERY VERY VERY far away. ]

Good luck. It really sucks that she's stuck you like this and won't even talk to you to explain what happened.

 

[Disney Fool]

I have a very dear Disney friend, an older woman who is very, very wise. A long time ago, she got tired of friends who wanted to come along on her Disney trips but somehow never wanted to pay up when the time came. My dear, wise friend now tells everyone, family included, the dates she's going, where she's staying with hubbie, and what she'll be doing. It's up to them if they want to join her--they have to make their own plans. Period. She told me she was sick of being disappointed by those perpetual "back-outs" after the plans were made. Nowadays, she's only concerned with her husband and herself. Makes life easier. At one time, I thought she was being rather hard on her friends, but oh, my,....how I have learned....Now, I tell my friends what I'm doing, where I'll be, and I hand them phone numbers to call. tee-hee. It's a sure way to find out who's really serious about the tirp.

 

[KimK2006]

Any chance you could take just her daughter with you? Hopefully you will get the money for the airline tickets so that is already a cost the mom has to eat
so she would just have to buy park tickets, have the kids save up their own spending money..... Then your daughter would have her friend with her.
Good luck Murphy

This is what I was going to suggest! Since the daughter's ticket is paid for, you have free dining, and you will already be paying the total cost for the resort room anyway, why not take her. If Mom can't come through with ticket $, maybe she had a dad/grandparent(s) who could give her an early Christmas gift. And she would have to bring her own spending $$. (I make my kids do that anyway!) Then you can give her the photo album with the Disney Surprise page!

 

[Amy&Dan]

I would tell her that you want CASH too. I can totally see this woman writing a hot check. And while I think its a shame for her little girl, frankly I wouldn't take her. Even with free dining, there's always lots of extras that come up. YOu don't want to not be able to buy your own daughter a souveneir or something because then you will be stuck paying for the other kid too. And its a huge responsibility to have another person's child with you on a trip. This woman sounds very irresponsible, who knows if she would send her with any money. Also, if you go make sure this child has valid health insurance so that if something comes up that base is covered. It sounds cold, but I just wouldn't do it. If mom doesn't pay up, your friendship is probably over anyway. And if it is, thats on her, not you.

I wouldn't let her go one day past July 6. If she doesn't pay cancel her end of it and don't let her weasle her way back in.

And again, make her pay you for cash for everything from here on out.

I feel so bad for you, what a shame. I hope you and your daughter have a wonderful trip.

 

[Frankiesmom]

What a shame! And the air credit will be in her and her DD's names- you won't even be able to use them. The airfare stays with the name of the ticketed passenger. I hope this works out for you!

 

[ObsessedwiththeMouse]

I would have my friend reimburse me the airline tickets and go with just me and my daughter. It will still be a fun weekend you get to spend together.

 

[Minnie&Nana]

This is such a shame. I am so sorry.

If possible, I would take the daughter and leave the mother in the dust. She will owe you the money for air anyway, so why not let the daughter go along - it will be a lot of fun for your DD and you too, I bet. Might consider down-grading the resort, if a value is still available, just to save money.

Of course, it will be a bit difficult to offer this as an option since you cannot get in touch with her, but fingers crossed, something will work out very soon.

Sending loads of dust your way!