Have you ever viewed a cremation?

Discussion in 'Community Board' started by LisaR, Jul 17, 2013.

  1. LisaR

    LisaR <img src=http://www.wdwinfo.com/images/silver.jpg>

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    Just read this article that says Cory Monteith's father is mad that he wasn't invited to the cremation. I'm not sure what their family problems are and I don't really care. I just can't get over the idea that people view the cremation. I know quite a few people who have been cremated including my own father and I never thought about watching it. Is this a common thing? :confused3

    http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/enterta...dly-devastated-he-wasnt-invited-to-cremation/
     
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  3. Allison

    Allison DIS Veteran

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    The article I read talked about the final viewing not actually watching the cremation.
     
  4. SLP958

    SLP958 DIS Veteran

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    I don't think people watch the actual process.
     
  5. LisaR

    LisaR <img src=http://www.wdwinfo.com/images/silver.jpg>

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    The article I posted says he was mad he wasn't "invited to the cremation." Maybe they just worded the article inappropriately?
     
  6. kathie859

    kathie859 DIS Veteran

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    Umm...I don't know, but a crematorium in Cincinnati advertises that they have a cremation viewing area. I just assumed that was for people who wanted to watch the box actually go into the furnace:confused3 Ick!!!

    I want to be cremated but I don't need an audience!
     
  7. Coonhound

    Coonhound DIS Veteran

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    Omg I HOPE it was the memorial and not the cremation!! :scared1: I think it would be too heartbreakingly sad (not to mention nightmare-inducing!) to watch your loved one being cremated!!
     
  8. ronandannette

    ronandannette I gave myself this tag and I "Like" myself too!

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    I spent a year interning as a funeral director. One can't exactly "view" a cremation as the process takes place inside a small combustion chamber called a retort and takes about 6 hours. In some cultures though it is a very common ritual to have a family member "load" the casket into the retort and push the igniter switch. In a modern context it's the equivalent of lighting the pyre.

    Now in our area families wanting this ceremony frequent certain funeral homes that have the proper environment set up to accommodate such needs. In many other funeral homes the retorts will be in a dank basement or sometimes off-site altogether in an industrial area depending on zoning laws. I'm not sure where this cremation took place but it certainly would not be a routine part of a western funeral to have a witnessed cremation. However, if the family brought it up beforehand as an expectation I'm sure the provider would have tried to accommodate them.
     
  9. StitchesGr8Fan

    StitchesGr8Fan DIS Veteran

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    Everyone I know that has been cremated was in a special casket for cremation. It wasn't like TV where they dump the body on a metal slab and slide them into the flames while you watch. I can't imagine them letting loved ones watch the cremation. Too much risk of someone freaking out and doing something stupid and getting hurt.

    And the articles I've read said nothing about them viewing the cremation, just a final viewing BEFORE the cremation.
     
  10. wilkeliza

    wilkeliza DIS Veteran

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    Probably is the last viewing as others have mentioned. Most funeral homes let the family see the body one final time before putting in for cremation. I would equate it to not being invited to the family only viewing before a funeral.
     
  11. ronandannette

    ronandannette I gave myself this tag and I "Like" myself too!

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    After reading it, I'm sure you're right...what a weird way to talk about a funeral!! And for the record, Vancouver (where the funeral was held) has an absolutely humongous Sikh population and their faith requires the ritual I mentioned above. There would have been tons of funeral homes that could have accommodated a witnessed cremation if desired by the family.
     
  12. Allison

    Allison DIS Veteran

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    The TV Guide article I read said his mom, brother, and Lea viewed the body at the hospital before the cremation and that his father was not aware he was being cremated. He was upset he didn't get to see him before the cremation.
     
  13. luvgoing2disney

    luvgoing2disney DIS Veteran

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    I accept that people process the loss of a loved one in their own way but I can not imagine wanting to witness that. It would cause me much, much more grief than any comfort.
     
  14. Laura66

    Laura66 DIS Veteran

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    I dunno - I don't think it's any more morbid the watching a casket lowered into a grave.

    My little brother passed away suddenly last year and I saw him one last time before he was cremated. I'm sure they put the body in some sort of box? Had I been offered or known about an opportunity to be there right before or during ( probably not viewing) I would have.
    He had a heart attack all alone and was alone for 3 days - his best friend and I found him. To be able to be with him until the very end - I don't know how to put into words - with his earthly body -so he wouldn't be alone . . . .
     
  15. bluezy

    bluezy DIS Veteran

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    There's a funeral home in our area that has that as well. It's just in the area where the casket/box is pushed in to the retort. You're not able to view the actual combustion taking place.
     
  16. crazyme5kids

    crazyme5kids DIS Veteran

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    My sister has. It was for a child who passed away. His family are Hindu, after the service/viewing at the funeral home they invited people to stay and watch the cremation.
     
  17. ronandannette

    ronandannette I gave myself this tag and I "Like" myself too!

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    This is a fairly common sentiment, and even families who didn't want to stay at the cemetery to watch the casket be lowered seemed to be comforted by the fact that one or more of us would be "with" the deceased until the process was complete. (This is not the same during cremation BTW...there is not someone present by the retort the whole entire time.)
     
  18. Laura66

    Laura66 DIS Veteran

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    Thank you - I didn't know how to put my feelings to print! We were so close - I just wanted to be there for him as long as I could.
     
  19. The Mystery Machine

    The Mystery Machine Sunrise at my house. :+)

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    I saw a show on HBO or one of the cable channels about funeral homes. In particular this one funeral home encourages families to go to the cremation and in fact has a service with it.

    Honestly to hear them discuss their viewpoints on the topic was very interesting and touching.

    It is not for everyone however many people felt that it really was something that gave them closure and felt as if they were sending their loved ones off, if that makes sense.

    I would consider it. My parents want to be cremated.
     
  20. ronandannette

    ronandannette I gave myself this tag and I "Like" myself too!

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    Simply put, funeral rites are for the sole benefit of the survivors. Pretty much anything a family requests that's legal and possible from a practical standpoint will be accomodated by a funeral home. It's very, very personal to each family what they will find comforting.
     
  21. SydSim

    SydSim <font color=royalblue>Keep Dancin'<br><font color=

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    Not to go off topic a bit, but when I read about his father being a little out of the loop, I immediately thought about what their relationship must have been like growing up, and its connection to his addiction problem. I'm always connecting childhood issues with adult problems.
     

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