Well, it's that time of year again. Kids are in school. The trees will start turning lovely shades of orange, red and gold, and I'm counting down the days until I return for my Food and Wine Festival trip. This year, my trip will be from October 14 - 19, 2009. I was going to put together my pre-trip ponderings / food review index placeholder page at the beginning of October, but I couldn't wait. I had to throw my hat into the ring and announce that I intend to do another festival food report. Originally, I called it "Glutton Fest 2009" and wanted Heimlich to be my icon, and I created a really pathetic signature picture. Then I asked TDC Nala to make one for me, and she came up with the new name for my trip. She figured that since I was going for gluttony in the month of October, it should therefore forever be known as: Gluttoberfest I'm really diggin' that new title, and I thought it would make a perfect title for this year's report. Thanks, Catherine! It's time to cut to the chase. This won't be your mama's food report. I am not taking kids with me, as I don't have any. This trip is revolving mostly around the Festival and its many events, tastings, and gluttonous noshings. In other words, if you were looking for a review of a character meal, Tony's Town Square, Le Cellier, or Whispering Canyon Cafe, you're reading the wrong report. Not that I don't appreciate you visiting and reading my reviews and checking out my food porn. I do! I'm just giving you all fair warning that my review will probably be quirky like me! I make two promises: There will be an index with clickable links. Updated in this post so you would not have to find the "needle in the haystack". There will be food porn. Here's the lowdown on the things I'll be reviewing. I may or may not post photos of the wine demos. Click the red links to get right to the reviews. Wednesday, October 14th: Noshing around World Showcase food kiosks and Bunratty Meade demo Kona Sushi Bar late "dinner" with Oybolshoi and her trusty sidekick/husband, Guy Incognito Thursday, October 15th: More noshing at the festival kiosks Culinary Adventures in Signature Dining event at Flying Fish Cafe Friday, October 16th: Kiosk noshing and Todd English culinary demo at the Festival Center Culinary Adventures in Signature Dining event at Todd English's bluezoo Saturday, October 17th: (Happy Birthday, Brenda!) Festival noshing; Greg Richie (Tchoup Chop chef) culinary demo at the Festival Center; Mexico Tequila Tasting event at "The Ditch", aka La Cava del Tequila Bistro de Paris dinner (with wine pairings!) Birthday cake (and more booze? yikes) for oybolshoi at Beach Club Sunday, October 18th: Breakfast Buffet at Captain's Grille and "snack" at La Cava del Tequila Victoria and Albert's main dining room Monday, October 19th: La Crema wine demo at the Festival Center and Final Kiosk Noshing So there you have it. TDC Nala will be doing all the scheduled events from October 16-19 with me, so if she wants to chime in with her patented Simpsons Rating System, that's fine with me. After much thought, why not have something related to Sleeping Beauty, since that's my favorite Disney film? So I devised the SKUMPS! Rating System based on Catherine's system. So let's start for the worst rating to the best rating. First, we have King Hubert with the Bad rating: "The food is so bad, I should cut the people responsible for cooking this mess with my rapier-sharp fish!" Next, we have the Minstrel, in his first of many appearances with the Ok rating: This means: "The food was perfectly ok to be served to the masses." Next, we have the Good rating: As in, "If you don't mind, my good man, I believe I'll have some more." And now, the Excellent rating: "This is excellent; too good to let any go to waste!" And since Catherine pointed out that we need a gastromic ecstasy picture, I finish with a Gluttony rating: This should be self-explanatory. This picture should state, "My excess of gluttony and sloth is a sight to behold. That's how good the food and wine were." There will be a lot of other DISers I'm going to be enjoying these events with, so I'll mention these people at the time I see them. Well, I already named Brenda/oybolshoi, who will be doing her own food report of some of the same events I am. Want to see food reports by people who'll be at the Festival with me? Tough, I'm giving you the links, anyway. You don't want to skip these. Trust me. Food Report links by my friends: Cy de Chantrer's LIVE ALL-FOOD Burlesque Review by ImprovGal Pie that Brownie, Fruitcake! by oybolshoi What Would Mr. Creosote Do? by TDC Nala Us, Food, Drink, Friends and Sledge by kabuki Like I said, this isn't your typical WDW vacation food report. This will be my typical Salute to Disney Food but Mostly the Food and Wine Festival. I am using a new camera with a food setting, but as I had tested it at home and at a restaurant, sometimes the non-food setting is better. It will be interesting to see how the food porn comes out. To quote my favorite line from a Carnival Cruise Line TV commercial: Buckle up, Buttercup! ** Prepare to feast. **Perhaps "unbuckle" would have been more appropriate.