Fluff: weird things your spouses do (nothing serious, this is for fun)

[jezebella]

Wow...I feel so much better. It seems none of them replace the toilet paper and find some random place to dump all their junk when they come in...and I have a basket too that he never puts his wallet, sunglasses, keys, mints, etc. into.

I also thought of a sneezing one...Every time DH has to sneeze he jumps up off the couch (or wherever) and runs to a lamp and sticks his head in it to make himself sneeze. If it's light outside, he runs to the window. Pretty funny to watch....

 

[Bluestars]

My husband does a few of the things already mentioned like -

Doesn't replace the toilet paper on the roll
Leaves lights on everywhere
Leaves drawers and cabinet doors open. He has also left our garage door open on several occasions.

He also puts stuff on a shelf on the entertainment center. I even bought a personal valet thing for him, yet all his stuff has to go on the entertainment center.

He will wash a load of clothes and leave them in the washer or dryer. On the off chance he actually takes them out of the dryer, he will put them on our dining room table. He never puts clothes away.

When he puts salt or pepper on something, he sprinkles the entire counter with it. I finally said something to him about it the other day. I asked him if he just took the salt shaker and salted the counters.

 

[sweetandsassyfl]

His car is an absolute pig sty.

 

[Mkgaapril]

mine will leave 3 squares of tp on the roll, because it still has some on it ya know...

and he steals all my change from my car..WTH...I give it to DD for the machines at school if she is low, or if I forget to stop at bank...GET YOUR OWN.

he also sings every song on the radio...one day I was like, would you just shut up and listen to the radio...he told me no and went on singing...

but, he is a keeper..

 

[Mkgaapril]

Wow...I feel so much better. It seems none of them replace the toilet paper and find some random place to dump all their junk when they come in...and I have a basket too that he never puts his wallet, sunglasses, keys, mints, etc. into.

I also thought of a sneezing one...Every time DH has to sneeze he jumps up off the couch (or wherever) and runs to a lamp and sticks his head in it to make himself sneeze. If it's light outside, he runs to the window. Pretty funny to watch....

oh, the dumping station...yea, we had a basket for his crap....he wouldn't use it. he used the kitchen counter, my dresser, the table , you name it..I got so mad one day that I took the basket and cut it up and put it in his lunch box..he informed me I had.."Issues"...now I just shove it in a drawer and watch him hunt...it is cheap entertainment

 

[crz4mm2]

DH says "phone's ringing" or "your pager's going off"....

Like I am deaf..... DRIVES me NUTS.

 

[crz4mm2]

Oh, and ALWAYS leaves the empty pizza pan in the oven when he has baked a pizza

 

[MeanLaureen]

DH Obi-Wan Pinobi can not, will not, stop chewing his fingernails. They are so chewed down, there are just nubs there. It was bad enough before but now that he's working for Home Depot (not your cleanest atmosphere) he's getting cold after cold from chewin' his nubs. I can't stop him. Anyone got any ideas? I'm thinking I might have to resort to things we use to break the dogs of bad habits. Squirt bottles.. rattle cans.. Don't make me resort to a rolled up newspaper! (j/k) I even caught him the other day looking a leeeeetle too close to my nails for comfort.

 

[Kitty 34]

Mine too.


My dh won't finish something he is eating.
He always eats ice cream from the box and chips from the bag, salsa from the glass jar, etc.

So, if there is just a spoonful of ice cream left, he won't eat it. Or if there are crumbs on the bottom of the bag, he puts the bag back for someone else to finish. I have to throw out old bags of chips, dip, ice cream. I cannot for the life of me, figure out why he does this. Unless he is just to lazy to throw anything away.

It's nice to know my husband is not alone!!!!

 

[CathrynRose]

DH sneezes loudly and dramatically, usually three times in a row, and when he's done says woo. ACHOOOO, ACHOOOOO, ACHOOOO, WOOOOOO. He says he can't help it, but how can you not help that? It's so irritating, and today he hurt his neck - you guessed it - sneezing.

Mine has the obnoxious sneeze too.

DH says "phone's ringing" or "your pager's going off"....

Like I am deaf..... DRIVES me NUTS.

Yes - this too.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

DH Obi-Wan Pinobi can not, will not, stop chewing his fingernails. They are so chewed down, there are just nubs there. It was bad enough before but now that he's working for Home Depot (not your cleanest atmosphere) he's getting cold after cold from chewin' his nubs. I can't stop him. Anyone got any ideas? I'm thinking I might have to resort to things we use to break the dogs of bad habits. Squirt bottles.. rattle cans.. Don't make me resort to a rolled up newspaper! (j/k) I even caught him the other day looking a leeeeetle too close to my nails for comfort.

LOL. Does he know about this thread? They do make some stuff that you can paint on their nails that tastes bad. They use it to stop kids from biting.

 

[MeanLaureen]

LOL. Does he know about this thread? They do make some stuff that you can paint on their nails that tastes bad. They use it to stop kids from biting.

He's already gone to bed so he hasn't seen this thread yet. Just in case... you never saw me here!

I did buy some of that stuff you paint on nails once. The bugger hid it from me.

 

[Mrs.Reese]

Let's see....My darling hubby is ADHD in the worst way. Add in a little OCD and it's never dull.

Must walk the hallway three times exactly, stop, sit in chair and repeat on a five minute loop while on the phone.

Surrounds himself with enough pillows to start a harem.

Of course leaves every single cabinet open after using

Only drinks soda but it can't be flat in any way. We have half-opened bottles everywhere that he mixes together.

Takes a good 30 minutes to dress because he is busy assessing the fashionability of his outfit. Then will spend another 10 on his hair.

Life is never dull.

 

[Fintastic]

My pet peeve is leaving the cupboard doors and drawers open after looking for something or taking something out. It takes 2 seconds to just close the door or the drawer and it looks so much better! I come home and I swear every drawer and cupboard door is open. I am beginning to think they do this to me on purpose!

Mine does the SAME thing.

 

[ChristineAndMatt29]

These are my FAVORITE threads. It makes me feel so much better that I'm not the only one driven crazy by "little" things. Mine refuses to try ANY new food and even if he falls asleep on the couch at night he'll wake up, move to bed and he'll HAVE to turn on the TV and start watching. Just go to sleep!!!! He's also one of those incapable of putting the new toilet paper roll on. Nice. One step at a time...

 

[ChristineAndMatt29]

double post

 

[Stacerita]

My husband makes bad jokes. Not like dirty jokes or anything, but reeeaally bad *groan and shake your head* puns and jokes.

His favorite for the holiday season:

Me: "I'm going to wrap presents."

DH: "Wicki-wicki" (this is supposed to be the sound of a scratching record, like a "rapper" would make...)

GROAN. It's so dumb, but he cracks himself up every time.

This cracked me up.

Takes off his socks and shoves them in the sides of the couch

I've been married for a few decades so the list is long. These are the highlights of my life though:

1) Thinks serving hotdogs for dinner to guests is a suitable meal.
2) Taps his fingers on the tabletop when talking.
3) Moves his lips while reading to himself.
4) Practices his golf swing in the mirror while waiting for the shower water to heat in the morning. Naked. Not a pretty sight when first waking.
5) Goes to the video store and rents a stack of movies nobody has ever heard of.

The one thing that my SO does is that he doesn't always greet other people or say bye. Its like he is so excited to be somewhere or to leave to go somewhere that he forgets.

 

[Rafiki Rafiki Rafiki]

You guys are making me so happy that my DH is so well-behaved most of the time. I read through them all, and mine passes on all but the one I posted and offense #74: the soaking pots and pans offense.

I have to add a new one: my DH cracks his knuckles. He says he can quit whenever he wants.

 

[Michelle67]

My husband and I have an ongoing toothpaste battle. We both annoy one another with the toothpaste. I leave the cap off, and he squeezes the middle.

 

[MushyMushy]

I thought of another one. DH makes me wait for him to get ready whenever we have to go somewhere. When the kids were little it would drive me insane, because I'd be running around the house getting three of us ready while he'd be sitting playing a video game and then start getting ready when we were finished. He still does that now, and will time himself so that he will get ready at the last possible minute -- I'll already be ready and in the car when he comes waltzing out.

I think it's a control issue! I've made a game of it to try to hold out for as long as possible to make him wait for me, but I have never won. I think he knows that I will never let myself be late to anything.