Day 3 was our 2nd day in Maui. We had no plans and we ended up finding trouble for sure. In Hawaii, there is a language the natives call Pigeon English. While it sounds nothing like Caribbean English, it is similar in that you could get the basic understanding of what someone is saying, but it's broken English and if spoken quickly, an outsider will not pick up most of what is being said.
So after parasailing, my two girls and I were trying to find a taxi. We walked and walked the Lahaina town for over an hour. I finally spot someone with the Disney lanyard noticed a few different families standing in a line. So I asked, "Are you guys on a tour or how are you getting back to the ship?" The explained that they were hopping on a bus that would drop them off at a mall. From the mall, there was a free
Disney Cruise shuttle that would pick us up and take us all back to the ship. So I stand in line, but one of the other passengers told me to get exact change. So I got out of line to get the change and came back just in time to see the bus pull up.
We were the very last people to board the bus and there were no seats left. A really nice guy offered me a seat in the front of the bus. My girls wouldn't take it, so I sat down. The next stop enough people got off the bus that there was a seat next to me. My 10yo sat down and my 13yo stayed standing. Now, to understand, the front of the bus had 6 seats facing sideways. 3 seats facing each other on each side. The first seat to face forward was completely empty now that the first stop was made. However, there was a native guy older than me, maybe early to mid-50s, He sitting the seat right next to the empty seat. He kept telling my 13yo to sit down in the empty seat next to him. I was sitting with one Disney girl, my daughter, and myself on one side of the bus and the other side with 3 seats facing our seats were older native women. The only reason I am pointing this out is because I was not completely understanding everything the guy was saying to my 13yo. He's speaking Pigeon English, but the women facing us were chuckling and laughing. I just know he kept it up, telling her he wasn't going to touch her, insisting that she sit down, but literally, he kept talking at her, nonstop. At one point, he said, "fine here I'll just use both" and put his feet up on the seat to be funny. Then he moved his feet back and said, "no really you can sit here. I'm not going to bother you.." Now, all the woman sitting around us and the people in the seats surrounding him (behind him, next to him and so) are listening and laughing. My 13yo is getting more and more embarrassed and leaned in to tell me she was uncomfortable sitting next to him.
To keep the mood light, I loudly stated, "Julie, you take my seat. I'll sit next to him." Everyone at this point started laughing harder. I stood up to take the empty seat while Julie rushed to my seat and sat very quickly. Now, the one Disney woman is in the first sideways seat, my two girls facing sideways in the next two seats and I am sitting in the first set of seats facing forward next to the guy, who at this point, had nothing left to say. There was no empty seat and no one was standing up. He leaned against the window quiet and content and proceeded to close his eyes and settle in for the duration of the time. All was back to a normal bus ride. Or so I thought.
Out of nowhere, this woman races up from the back of the bus, leans over me, smacks the guy next to me really hard and starts cursing while yelling at him. So I am completely lost now as to who this chick is and what in the heck is she saying. All I understand is every curse word, as she is standing over me, yelling and cursing at him. He starts calling her a stupid "B" and responding, but I am still only catching tiny fractions of what is said. Mostly, I get that he could care less about whatever she is so angry at and tell her to "F" off "B". So I look to see the mood, because not understanding, all I can do is read the body language of everyone else. I am not kidding, the ladies and people around me are uproarious with laughter. So I figured, ok, I am at a loss as to what is going on, but no one is scared or worried, so I'll just stay quiet and keep my seat. She finally is done ranting at him but walks back to her seat in the far back yelling and cursing the entire way back to the mall. The Disney people right behind me are laughing, Disney girl next to my girls is laughing and the ladies facing my girls are all laughing again. The entire bus ride back, the lady from the back of the bus is cursing, ranting, and carrying on and the rest of the bus are all giggling and laughing at the situation.
We finally get to the mall and the Disney woman (maybe late 20s?? I can't remember exactly) who was sitting next to my girls looks at me, laughs, and exclaims, "Best bus ride EVER!!" So I started laughing and asked what the heck happened. Who was the woman and why did she run up from the back of the bus enraged. She explained that she thought it was the guy's wife and she was mad that I sat next to him. Apparently, the entire bus ride she was ranting and yelling at me, calling me a slut and all sorts of other names. Seriously, I was blissfully unaware. We both agreed that we wish we had grabbed our phones to record that entire bus scene. I am so sorry I didn't because typing it out doesn't do the story much justice, but both of us had the same thought process. We weren't sure if the woman would have been more angered if we had pulled our phones and started recording. Looking back, we really should have.
So, I am sorry that I missed the taping of the most insane part of the day. When I said I was going to find trouble that morning, I was just making a joke. I had no idea I was foreshadowing the day's events.
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