College student spending money....

Discussion in 'Budget Board' started by westjones, Sep 18, 2012.

  1. westjones

    westjones <font color=blue>Mother of Two <font color=deeppin

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2002
    Messages:
    8,137
    I have twins who both started college this year. Originally we told them they both have to work for their spending money.

    Well one of my DD has a mild learning disability; it takes her twice as long to read as others and she is part of the college's 'Student With Disabilities" program and can take longer for her tests and get tutoring.

    We are now not sure about having her work because we really want her to do well in school, and college is so much harder and they don't offer the type of support she had in high school so it has been a huge adjustment.

    So if she doesn't work for her spending money, and I am sure there are others who children also don't do this (my neighbor's daughter is in a very difficult engineering program and she don't want her to work either because her courses are so demanding).....how much spending money do you give to your college students each month?

    Thanks
     
  2. Avatar

    Google AdSense Guest Advertisement


    to hide this advert.
  3. clh2

    clh2 <font color=green>I am the Pixie Stick NARC at my

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2003
    Messages:
    8,840
    I hope this helps - we have a DD in college - and at a "question/answer" session that the parents had iwth the student leaders for the student orientation - this question came up. So - it was a question a freshman parent asked of a group of students - mostly juniors (although there were a few seniors and 1 sophomore).

    The general range was $10-20 per week (actually the individual answers were mostly $10-15 and $15-20). Only 1 person said $30/week, and while you might have had to be there to appreciate his answer - he really likes food, and lots of it, and he went out for food - lots of it.

    Hope that helps!
     
  4. clh2

    clh2 <font color=green>I am the Pixie Stick NARC at my

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2003
    Messages:
    8,840
    Sorry - forgot the rule!
     
  5. Patience

    Patience DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2011
    Messages:
    1,494
    We don't want our daughter to work in college either, at least not while she is cheering because cheer takes up a lot of her time. She gets $100 per month as spending money from her grandmother. Anything else she needs for spending money she gets from the money she saved from her job last summer, although my husband slips her a twenty every time we go to see her cheer at a football game. We pay for everything else she needs (tuition, dorm, meal plan, etc).
     
  6. AuntieKels

    AuntieKels Mouseketeer

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2010
    Messages:
    145
    My grandparents gave me $50 a month while I was away at school. I was never rolling in money so I always spent it wisely. I went to a private university so many of my classmates had unlimited credit cards at their disposal. I didn't have that so I was left out of dinners off campus, shopping trips or concerts in the city. Looking back at it now, I'm glad I went through what I did. As an adult with a job and bills I now focus my money on more important things and know it's value.

    I wish your daughter the best of luck this year! I went through a special needs program at my school and was so lucky to have it. It's a big change from High school but it's all worth it in the end!
     
  7. danygirl

    danygirl DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2012
    Messages:
    518
    I might sound mean to you, but I don't give my college kids ANY spending money, and they have to work in the summer to contribute to their expenses. The oldest lives with his girlfriend, so while I will pay his tuition, I offer NO MONEY towards his rent. The second has a big scholarship and some grants, plus I work at her university and get a very big discount, so we split the bill ( she really doesn't have to pay much). I found that when I was paying for everything they did not think so much about what they were doing, the oldest didn't get great grades. When THEIR time and money were on the table, doing the best they could became much more important to them.

    My kids are bright and talented and have had no problem finding summer work.

    I agree that working during the school year is tricky and that each student has to weigh the course load, outside activities, etc when considering whether working during the school year is a good idea or not. Grades come first, and if they can't maintain high grades while working they should focus strictly on school. On the other hand, there is absolutely no reason why a student who is not paying for any of their school could not work during the summer and save that money for spending money.
     
  8. westjones

    westjones <font color=blue>Mother of Two <font color=deeppin

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2002
    Messages:
    8,137
    Oh I understand those who say they give no money. We said that....but are now reevaluating the situation because our daughter who was used to the wonderful resource room at her high school is struggling to adjust to college. And bottom line, we want her to graduate.

    Not all children are lucky enough to be the top of their class with no problems at all, but even children with mild learning disabilities deserve their best shot at a career. And working at a fast food place for spending money is a good thing, but not if your child is struggling.

    My problem also is my girls are twins, only one has the learning disability, but if I give one money I will have to give the other money too. My other daughter has a job. The one did have a job, but we could see she needed to drop it.

    But $10 a week wouldn't be bad. They both live at home and eat at home, and we pay for tuition, fees and books. But I do want her to be able to go out with friends and hang out once in a while. She wants to work at a camp next summer, so hopefully she will be able to make money over the summer for next year.

    Just trying to figure out this year.
     
  9. westjones

    westjones <font color=blue>Mother of Two <font color=deeppin

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2002
    Messages:
    8,137
    Thanks! It has been a huge adjustment. I think she will adjust, but the first year is the hardest to get used to. But she is trying....I just want to give her the best shot at succeeding, and to also let her have some fun times along the way.
     
  10. Southernmiss

    Southernmiss <font color=green>I am hazed everyday<br><font col

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2011
    Messages:
    2,674
    Since she's living at home, you'll know more about what she wants to do during the week than kids who are away. I would sit down and talk with your daughters and tell them you'd like for them to have a bit of "fun" money and then talk with them about a reasonable amount.

    I am pretty cheap and think college kids who would go out to dinner once a week with friends would need at least $15 for that, so I would say $15 to $20 per week with the understanding that you can revisit the situation if it seems they are taking advantage of your generosity.
     
  11. PattiPB

    PattiPB <font color=green>I'll be happy to learn the secre

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2000
    Messages:
    1,779
    Our freshman daughter went across the country for college. I have access to her online banking. As she continues to demonstrate her financial integrity and sense of responsibility, we will demonstrate our appreciation by supporting those expenditures that relate to her schoolwork.

    So...we have no hard rule on this so far. She has an unlimited meal plan and we send quarters for laundry. If she continues to spend reasonably, we will help her when and if she asks. We had her on a budget through high school. She now has a block of cash (from working all summer). If she can continue budgeting appropriately, we'll help her make that last until she can work full-time next summer.

    Hope this isn't a "non answer". I guess my short answer is this: We're figuring it out as we go along!!! ::yes::
     
  12. LJSquishy

    LJSquishy DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2011
    Messages:
    2,432
    I first think it's wonderful that both of your daughters are attending college. :thumbsup2 Second, for one to hold a job while in college is great, and for the one that has a disability, the fact that she is sticking with it is awesome!

    I think $10-$20/week is a great amount. It isn't so much money that they can be too irresponsible with, but it is enough for them to feel like they can go out once and a while, or save it all. :)
     
  13. Fyrefly

    Fyrefly Mouseketeer

    Joined:
    Oct 27, 2009
    Messages:
    453
    My freshman/sophomore years I think my parents gave me between 10 and 20 a week plus a roll of quarters every so often for laundry. I can't remember the exact sum and they just put it all at once in my account so it was there whenever I needed it. I was so frugal freshman year I don't think they gave me any extra for sophomore year at all.

    I would have worked my freshman summer but between wisdom teeth needing to come out and some other family related stuff that couldn't I would have missed the times when interns start. Most wouldn't hire a freshman anyhow.

    As soon as I started full-time internships for sophomore and beyond I stopped getting any kind of spending money and used summer money the rest of the year.
     
  14. monorailmom

    monorailmom DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    May 6, 2008
    Messages:
    646
    This is a great thread: I also have twin daughters who have just started college.

    We actually haven't discussed a monthly budget, but now you're making me think that we should have! They worked all summer, and banked a good amount, so I was thinking that was their 'fun' money, along with whatever extra their grandparents sent them. I have sent one daughter laundry money twice: the other is still using the laundry money I gave her at the start, though she started school a week later than her sister.

    It's hard because while they both have tough majors, one is a nursing major, and we haven't wanted her to try to work yet. Her classes are very challenging. The other, however, only got to attend the school she wanted because she got work study. She only has to work 8 hours a week, so it isn't awful...but it's tough that now suddenly they are in two completely different situations!
     
  15. disfan07

    disfan07 DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2006
    Messages:
    3,465
    I completely understand the situation. I am going into my senior (well 5th year) in college and my 3rd year at this particular university. I haven't worked during school since my first year at community college when I was 19. My parents have always believed that school comes first. That means classes, research programs, volunteer work, etc.

    However, I really like working....I really do. But my parents completely forbid me to work my first 2 years at this school. Reason being....I am also a part of disabilities services at my school but for medical reasons. I usually miss anywhere between 3 days and 3 weeks of classes each quarter (10 weeks). My parents wanted me focusing on my classes and my health.... And it has paid off. I have above a 3.8 right now....wouldn't have been possible if I was working. Also, just try getting a part time job when you are sick all the time and always away for appointments....not easy

    So....all of that was to say that even as a junior and 4th year (and now 5th year)my parents still gave me spending money. But we didn't have a set amount. I would just ask when I needed something and my mom would transfer it to my bank. On average, my parents probably give me $100/ week for necessities and $50/month for extras. They also still pay for most of my clothes, etc.
    It really all depends on the individual and their situation though.

    Good luck to your daughters! If the disabilities center at their school is anything like ours here, it is an amazing thing to have and is soooooooo helpful. If it wasnt for them, there is no way I would be able to go to school full time.
     
  16. westjones

    westjones <font color=blue>Mother of Two <font color=deeppin

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2002
    Messages:
    8,137
    I guess that good answer is to figure it out as we go.

    I worry about my one daughter who isn't working now because her boyfriend is spending too much money on her, and I told her not to do that. They are welcomed to soda and food here, but they keep going out and he keeps paying and I don't want him doing that.

    I do keep his favorite soda here and he has eaten here a little, but he likes to eat out. But she is going to be on a much tighter budget then him. He works so he has spending money.

    One nice thing at college, they have a lot of free entertainment for the students, so that helps.
     
  17. DawnM

    DawnM Dawn

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2005
    Messages:
    12,927
    I would sit down and figure out what she needs. If she can take along any food she will need from home, food money would be a min.

    I would think that you could come up with a good number. If she lives at home do you cover all food, toiletries, gas, etc....????? If so, she shouldn't need much.

    We don't want our son (oldest) to work when he gets to college either. He has some LDs too and we would rather he focus on school. But we will see.

    Dawn
     
  18. westjones

    westjones <font color=blue>Mother of Two <font color=deeppin

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2002
    Messages:
    8,137
    It is all a lot to figure out with you are dealing with LDs You want them independent, but you also want them to succeed.

    It is possible she may be coaching a middle school girls basketball team, but they will pay her at the end, and it won't be a lot. But she is studying special education and wants to work with middle school kids and she also wants to coach so if she gets this we felt it would contribute to her goals for her future.

    But if she doesn't get this job, I think I would rather her wait until summer to get a job.

    For us, the hardest part is dealing with the 'twin' issue. Wanting to be fair to both and not give one more than the other....but frustrated because the one without the LD has a job and can be independent (although she works at American Eagle and it seems like she is working for clothes and spends more at work than she makes), but giving to one rather than other wouldn't be good and cause issue.

    The complexities of twins has been an ongoing issue for us over all these years.....this is just one more of those issues I guess. haha
     
  19. BubMunkeyBles

    BubMunkeyBles DIS Veteran

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Messages:
    1,065
    I went to school out of state and my parents gave me much more. But it was to also cover other expenses. I want to say I got a few hundred a month. It's been a while.

    ETA: My parents didn't pay my tuition, they did agree to pay my living expenses while I was in school though.
     
  20. punkin

    punkin <font color=purple>Went through pain just to look

    Joined:
    Nov 28, 2001
    Messages:
    11,985
    I don't think it's mean and we do the same for our DD, but OP specifically stated that there are learning issues involved. I think in that case, it would be setting a child up to fail if you expect her to work. She already has to put in more time to achieve the same results. I am all for working in the summer, but not during the school year and I would provide monetary support for that.
     
  21. magik

    magik Mouseketeer

    Joined:
    May 16, 2008
    Messages:
    343
    I worked retail full time during summers and winter break (1 month), and that made me enough to easily cover my spending money. My parents contributed towards tuition and room and board, but not spending, and I didn't have to work during school except for my 15 hours a week of work study that was part of my financial aid package.
     

Share This Page