Chuck Norris jokes

Discussion in 'Teen Disney' started by straightj23, Jun 22, 2007.

  1. straightj23

    straightj23 DIS Veteran

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    Hey guys! Felt like being random today. So, tell your favorite Chuck Norris joke or jokes. Mine is:

    "Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits."

    lol

    And just in case you aren't familiar, here's a website you can check out:

    http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
     
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  3. PurpleDucky

    PurpleDucky <font color=green>Sorry folks, this ain't skinemax

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    Chuck Norris doesn't check for the Boogeyman in his closet
    The Boogeyman checks for Chuck Norris in his closet
     
  4. MyHappyEnding_

    MyHappyEnding_ No.

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    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
     
  5. BandGeek911

    BandGeek911 <font color=blue>Take my advice, don't eat the gum

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    Once Chuck Norris' wife burned the turkey on thanksgiving, he told her not to worry, he went in the backyard, and came back five minutes later with a turkey. He then ate it whole, and then threw it up a few seconds later fully cooked with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked me how he had done it he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said “Never question chuck norris”
     
  6. STOPxmickeytime

    STOPxmickeytime <font color=red>Juice is like the blood of fruits<

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    chuck norris once roundhouse kicked a baby elephant into puberty.
     
  7. Captain Brain

    Captain Brain <font color=teal>School is so draining<br><img src

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    Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
     
  8. Mur13

    Mur13 DIS Veteran

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    Chck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because he's afraid of th dark. The dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
     
  9. jessaboo

    jessaboo Five long grueling days!

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    When it's time for taxes to be paid, all Chuck has to do is send in a picture of himself, and the government sends back your money to him.


    Chuck Norris is really 164 years old.
    Rogain works.
     
  10. bgirldeb

    bgirldeb DIS Veteran<br><font color=purple>Sometimes when I

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    *bump*
    If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
    .
    Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
    .
    Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.
    .
    Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.
     
  11. Pirate Me

    Pirate Me DIS Veteran

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    I'm sorry but am I the only one that doesn't get these? xD
     
  12. DramaQueen

    DramaQueen <font color=green>for the love of LEO!<br><marquee

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    lmao! these are hilarious.

    sooo random.

    (L) chuck norris (L)
     
  13. disney100666

    disney100666 DIS Veteran

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    I don't get them either. I honestly don't even know who Chuck Norris is.
     
  14. SBubba18

    SBubba18 <img src=http://www.wdwinfo.com/images/smilies/roc

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    In 8th grade, we had a saying.."What will Chuck Noris do? Kick some a**!"
     
  15. Rockstar mentality

    Rockstar mentality Probaly on the sidekick

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    "Chuck norris does not get wet, the water gets Chuck Norrissed.'

    haha and my second favorite is:

    "one day Chuck Norris woke up and decided 2 sell his pee, it is now known as red bull.
     
  16. Damhsa04

    Damhsa04 Damhsa it's Irish for Dance

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    I love this one:

    Chuck Norris' tears cure AIDS. Too bad Chuck Norris doesn't cry.
     
  17. Ms.Squeakers

    Ms.Squeakers <font color=red>♥ <font color=teal>Forget Diamonds

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    When did this ever start is what Im wondering...

    Because I feel like it only started popping up like..2 years ago

    AND PLUS

    Walker Texas Ranger

    was an awesome show

    (after all Ricky Bobby named his kids "walker" and "Texas Ranger" XD)
     
  18. Rockstar mentality

    Rockstar mentality Probaly on the sidekick

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    lol i think some random person portrayed him as aamazing and starte dmaking jokes about how good he is and i catched on with his friends then everyone was doing it
     
  19. Ms.Squeakers

    Ms.Squeakers <font color=red>♥ <font color=teal>Forget Diamonds

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    Thats kinda what I thought
     
  20. Rockstar mentality

    Rockstar mentality Probaly on the sidekick

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    lol but i bet u spelt it better in your mind then i spelt it in my post
     
  21. Ms.Squeakers

    Ms.Squeakers <font color=red>♥ <font color=teal>Forget Diamonds

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    :lmao:

    Nope,
    I probably spelt it like..well worse then that

    Like..you dont even wanna hear how I tried spelling that really long word from marry poppins this morning

    EVEN THOUGH THE SONG WAS PLAYING ON THE TV FROM THE PARADE XD
     

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