Anyone else here NOT in the holiday spirit?

Discussion in 'Community Board' started by 4forMe, Dec 5, 2012.

  1. 4forMe

    4forMe DIS Veteran

    Jul 21, 2007
    I am really struggling with the holiday season this year.

    I posted on the other thread (how you would grade this past year) about the terrible year this has been. I am still having a hard time coping with the death of my best friend. We had so many traditions we would do together this month for the holiday. I don't feel like celebrating. DH and I have barely any decorations up right now. We do have to put some up as we host Christmas Eve every year, but I just feel like doing the bare minimum.

    I also feel terribly guilty because my kids love the Christmas season, and I'm just not into it this year.

    Anyone else having a hard time with the holidays right now? If so, my thoughts are with you. :grouphug:

    Thanks for listening.
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  3. disney1990

    disney1990 <font color=royalblue>Wow, it make my heart skip a

    Aug 24, 1999
    I am sorry that you are struggling so much this year -- it has been rough.

    Mine hasn't been as bad, but I lost my full-time job and haven't been able to find another one.

    I have been listening to Christmas music and trying to decorate some in order to try and find some Christmas spirit. Give it a try.
  4. Breezy_Carol

    Breezy_Carol Who needs doors when you can use windows

    Jun 13, 2000
    I have no decorations up at all and am just not motivated to get them out. I bought cards but haven't sent them.

    I have no reason to be in a funk but just can't get it in gear. No young kids and family a little spread out. Money is tight, which may be the biggest reason.

    Out church has a Blue Christmas service to recognize people in your situation who have lost someone or are having a hard time with the season. I hope you feel better and don't feel alone.
  5. happily single

    happily single <font color=royalblue>Left foot first!<br><font co

    Jan 12, 2008
    I am in the same boat. For reasons I don't/can't get into I just can't get into the season anymore.

    I do have the tree up and have decorated the house, but that's because the kids were basically doing it themselves.

    I haven't bought a single gift yet.
  6. superme80

    superme80 DIS Veteran

    May 2, 2010
    Right there with you. We put lights up around our window for the kids. No tree yet. I had a feeling this Christmas was not going to be magical and I have been right. :hugs: So sorry for your loss.
  7. Caseheidi

    Caseheidi DIS Veteran

    Aug 28, 2012
    My DH lost his DF at a young age in the month of December. I discovered this over the first few years of our marriage, and discovered it was the reason he went into a funk each December. He didn't even realize it until I pointed it out. We now try to honor my FIL and keep his picture up. My husband also pushes through the funk for our family. The only time he totally gets out of it is when we have done a Disney trip early December, and since we had kids.

    If you want ideas, I would suggest honoring your dear friend by doing some of the things you did together. Maybe there is someone else who misses them that you could do them with. Celebrate your dear friend and their life by remembering the times you had together and write some of them down. I have seen how this can really help the grieving process and remember the things you love about them. It is never easy to lose someone we love, and I hope you find ways that help.
  8. STLDisney_Freak

    STLDisney_Freak I don't have a short attention span, I just.....OH

    Feb 12, 2007
    I would really like to pass this holiday season by as I'm not even in the mood for it. My father has been in the hospital since September 27. He had a ruptured brain anuerysm which caused vasospasms which caused him to have two strokes midbrain. Then he was diagnosed with critical care myopathy. He has been in 4 different hospitals and getting ready to be discharged from the rehab hospital and move into a skilled nursing facility for more rehab. I hope that he eventually gets to come home but he has had a very slow recovery. My mom and I have been running ourselves to death to get to the hospital every day. Frankly having someone in the hospital is $$$ as far as gas money, lunch money, etc. It all adds up.

    My husband has helped me soo much with our two daughters and I'm trying to get in the christmas spirit for them, but I just don't know...
  9. pigletgirl

    pigletgirl <font color=green>You do have a life. It is just i

    Jun 11, 2006
    I am trying to make the best of it. We haven't decorated much, just the tree and a garland on the mantel. I'm tired, in school full time, and pregnant. My focus has definitely been the baby!
  10. wiigirl

    wiigirl DIS Veteran

    Oct 29, 2012
    I was....but losing it quickly....
  11. mickeyboat

    mickeyboat <font color=660099>Nothing like the cream and choc

    Oct 14, 2003
    I am not in to it this year, either. We don't have a tree and only have up a few decorations that the kids brought upstairs. It is so much work for me, and I just not up to doing it. We have been busy most nights and every weekiend with hockey, and there isn't enough time to do everything.

    I do have the bulk of my shopping done, though.

    I am going to put my big girl panties on this weekend and get the tree, get the house decorated and do some wrapping. Hopefully I will perk up then!
  12. minkydog

    minkydog DIS Cast Member

    Dec 8, 2004
    :grouphug: I'm not in your shoes *this* Christmas, but I have been before. Back when DS26 was about 2,I suffered from debilitating depression. I couldn't stand any of the trappings of Christmas. I just wanted to slit my wrists all the time. My DH was so wonderful. He didn't put any pressure on me. He got a live tree and set it up on the back deck. He decorated it with colored lights, bird seed and pieces of orange. DS and DH enjoyed that tree, while I did not have to even look at it.

    We've had a few other hard Christmases,due to illness and injury, but none as hard as that one was. I recommend that you stop and take care of YOURSELF. There are no "tips & tricks" for getting through grief. You have it. You experience it. There are no shortcuts. Allow yourself the time to grieve. Give yourself permission to feel your feelings. And if that means you don't have a give loud Christmas, so be it. Jesus's first Christmas wasn't so hot either, so I'm sure he'd understand.:littleangel:
  13. MrsDuck

    MrsDuck DIS Veteran

    Sep 2, 2011
    I don't even feel like Christmas is so soon. My wedding is overshadowing it and no one in my family is really in the spirit.
  14. PlutosFriend

    PlutosFriend <font color=royalblue>Spoke too soon<br><font colo

    Feb 7, 2004
    So sorry for the loss of your best friend. I can't even begin to imagine how hard that is. I am not in the spirit much, but not due to something horrific like that. Mine is mainly my kids. Their attitudes. They are 12 and 14. I may start another thread on that itself..
  15. I loveStitchnippyjon

    I loveStitchnippyjon DIS Veteran

    May 15, 2007
    No Holiday spirit here at all. No major catastrophe, just a long series of problems lately that have DH and I worn down. DH cancelled the party he had planned for the 19th and I have no interest in even decorating.
    To top it off, neither of my DD's and their families will be here for Christmas. One family is MAYBE for the week after Christmas, but not sure.
    I guess I'm just feeling sorry for myself...
  16. mamamary

    mamamary DIS Veteran

    Oct 11, 2006
    I'm not in the spirit either. We've decorated - but we have def. scaled back. The kids are older and it seems they don't care. My DBIL had a brain aneurysm back in Oct. and has been having setback after setback.
  17. kimmar067

    kimmar067 TAGS?? It's all about the 'likes' now!

    Mar 7, 2001
    ...I share your sentiment...:hug:
  18. wdwmom0f3

    wdwmom0f3 Thankful my embarrassing tag is gone!

    Aug 10, 2008
    I am not in the mood at all. In fact I feel like I could have a heart attack at any minute. I'm sure its anxiety attacks. We are just stressed to the max this year because of an ongoing issue that my oldest daughter is going through (and putting us through :sad2: ) and because a very dear friend of mine has a son who is 19 that just found out he has malignant melanoma. :sad1: He is having a test done in less than an hour to see if it has spread beyond his lymph nodes. I also found out today that a very sweet 7th grade boy also has cancer. Their problems are worse than mine but trying to stay positive through all of this is very hard at the moment. I have been praying more than I ever have before.

    I just want the new year to get here, hit the reset button and pray for a better year for everyone in this world. I know so many people right now that are in need of some good news for a change.
  19. kimmar067

    kimmar067 TAGS?? It's all about the 'likes' now!

    Mar 7, 2001
  20. momtojandj

    momtojandj Mouseketeer

    Feb 9, 2012
    :grouphug: I am with those who arent into christmas this year. It has always been my favorite time of year. Thankfully for online shopping, I dont have to go to the store as much to shop. Trying very hard for my kids. My husband was killed in Oct. Still doesnt feel real to say it. Some very good friends came over and helped decorate my tree. . I know i am not alone, alot of people hate, dread the holidays amd my prayers are with all of us.:grouphug:
  21. tigercat

    tigercat <font color=magenta>Cook, clean and foot massage.

    Mar 4, 2000
    I'm sorry to hear that momtojandj.
    I am not in the spirit of Christmas this year as well. My one dd has turned on me and it seems everything in life with me was horrible. She and her family will not be here although her dd is living with me because my dd threw her out.
    My other dd's dh has been abusive this year for some reason and it seems it is also part of my fault. I babysit their 3 kids for free and that is okay but nothing else. I am so careful to not get in their business although both of them seem to want to tell me. I am not critical and the kids are great here and I spoil them but not in a bad way. I spoil them with my time. I have harder rules for them than the parents and they are great for me. He has decided that they won't be spending Christmas here either. I would think that it is all my fault except the things are different for both dd.
    My dd has said that it isn't my fault but I still seem to be in the middle and I keep trying to get out of it.
    That leaves my 2 ds and my dh. My dgrdd who lives here will probably go to her house for dinner.
    I am not having a tree or decorating at all this year. As far as gifts go I am thinking that I will not be doing them either. My holiday isn't Christmas it is at the end of Feb but we have celebrated Christmas because the rest of them do have Christmas. I think this year I will celebrate my holiday this year.

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