you can read my last post called being tested for cancer these past 3 years have sucked. well here is an update. my blood test all came back normal! yay! super happy for that. i still have to go for more bloodwork and another ultrasound before i leave for my trip. well me and my DH have been trying for another baby since my youngest was a few months old. like i said in my last post we have had 2 losses. one being a late loss. its been so hard. my first 4 pregnancies were text book perfect! i had preeclampsia one time, with my first. but that was at the end. he was born a day before his due date. otherwise everything was perfect. then well you can read my last post. to painful to type again. so here we are, still trying and everyone is getting pregnant. omg! i have 18 friends on facebook that are all pregnant. including my 2 sisters. one of my good friends just announced today she is pregnant. she tried for 2 months! we have been trying for 19 months. we got pregnant right away except with my first. my first took 13 months but i blame that on the birth control i was using before we started trying. i know this may seem like im just being a cry baby, and really it feels like it. but after 2 losses, esp. having my last baby die on my chest, there is nothing i want more than my last baby. the baby that will make our family feel complete. oh you wont believe how many people tell me oh just be happy you have 4. some people cant have any! and trust me when i say this, my children are my world! i love them so much and i feel so blessed every day i wake up to good morning mommy and lots of smiles! but i just feel empty.