About to Quit Job - Nervous

Discussion in 'Budget Board' started by reggiemcp, May 24, 2007.

  1. reggiemcp

    reggiemcp Mouseketeer

    Jun 30, 2003
    Hi All!

    Need some support here. I am about to give notice at my job and become a stay at home mom, nervous and excited. My DS pirate: is almost 3 and he has been in daycare since he was 4 months old. Up until recently, things were going ok. But I have become very unhappy at work and the pressures at home (morning rush, cries of no go to school, afternoon rush, etc.) just never seem to stop. We also have had to deal who is going to stay home when DS is sick. So after much discussion, we are going to try the stay at home thing for a year. He will be 4 next summer and then going to pre-k, so I will try to find a part-time job while he is in school.

    I have a good job and I also have the health benefits. But we will be able to get insurance with our current carrier through the state. It also seems as though 85% of my check goes to daycare, lunches, etc. Daycare alone is $1100 a month. Money will be tight, maybe no Disney trip next year. It also means staying in our 1 bedroom apartment another year, but I feel like this is the best choice for now.

    I feel like my DS is growing so fast and I am missing so much. My husband is being supportive but is nervous about being the sole breadwinner.

    So give me some good vibes and hints on squeezing pennies. I am already trying to cut monthly expenses and looking for some side work to do at home (customer services, transcription, etc.) to earn some extra dollars.

    So have at it and help me feel good about this decision. I am very excited about being a full time mommy!:yay:
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  3. Hedy

    Hedy <font color=blue>I'm <s>22</s> 27 and I still kind

    Mar 14, 2006
    :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:
    Good luck! You might want to look into doing demonstrations (see the massive thread on the BB)-presuming DH works M-F and can watch DS, and extra $70 here and there might fund some extras.
  4. hydster

    hydster <font color=teal>Self Proclaimed <font color=green

    Jan 29, 2002
    Just enjoy every second of it! I've been a SAHM for 12 years and while it hasn't always been easy we've somehow managed. I know it's a scary transition! We did it with 1 child, 1 on the way and a brand new mortgage at the age of 24 so yeah it scared the living hell out of us but we made it somehow!

    I don't really remember what I did to save $$$ really I just did it but one thing I did do was I bought clothes at the end of one season when they were on clearance for the next year for my kids. Saved a bunch of $$ that way.

    A lot of stuff we used in the beginning was generic brand stuff because it was cheaper. I used the dollar store a lot for things like dish soap and bath soap because it was much cheaper than the grocery store.

    Sometimes we lived on Top Ramen or Spaghetti because it was much cheaper but we survived it.
  5. welovedisney7778

    welovedisney7778 Mouseketeer

    Jun 28, 2006
    Congratulations on your decision! You are going to love being home with your little guy! I was in a similar situation when we had our DS two years ago. I worked full time before I had him making almost as much money as my DH, but after having him, I took three months off, and then went back for two half days a week. (My mom watches him those two days) I was sooooo nervous about how the drastic drop in our income was going to work out, but it was fine. We just tightened up a little bit here and there, and it all worked out. Daycare is sooooo expensive, and I'd rather be home with my son myself anyways, so it was the best solution for our family. Don't worry too much, everything will work itself out. Enjoy your time with your adorable little boy!!
  6. MsSpinShady

    MsSpinShady Mouseketeer<br><font color="3d8e33">I'm always lat

    Nov 9, 2003
    We have been where you are now, and I can tell you that although it has not always been easy financially, it was the best decision for our family and our kids. Our oldest is graduating from HS next week and will be off to college in the fall and I can tell you that I DO NOT REGRET FOR ONE MINUTE the time I spent with him rather than at work. (We eventually started our own business so we could work from home, but that's a whole 'nother story! :rotfl: )

    One of the things you can really take advantage of in your situation without breaking the bank is to find activities in your area that you can do with your ds for free -- libraries (oftentimes they even hold book readings and special events for preschoolers), parks, free outdoor movie nights, biking to school playgrounds, etc. Check your local paper frequently because they often list free local activities.

    Try to make sure you have a good support system in place for those times when you get lonely, frustrated or just need to talk to an adult. And remember, those times too, will pass.

    I'm sure you will get a lot of excellent budgeting advice from the wise Dis'ers on this board. I just wanted to congratulate you and wish you, your dh and ds the best!!! :grouphug: Have fun! :cheer2: :cheer2: :cheer2:

    MsSpinShady princess:
  7. Bren's Mom

    Bren's Mom DIS Veteran

    Aug 11, 2006
    I work full time and have a 12yo and 1.5yo at home...so I feel your pain! I wish you good luck being a SAHM!!! :cheer2:
  8. teamagic

    teamagic Mouseketeer

    Mar 10, 2006
    Congratulations on your decision. When we adopted our daughter, I returned to work so that we could continue to save more money for our second adoption. Even with my mom watching our daughter, we still spent an insane amount of money on take out and other expenses. As soon as we adopted our son and made sure that all of our expenses were paid, I quit my goverment job. It was so scary - giving up the benefits. BUT, After 2 years I can say that the benefit of staying home vs work benefits does not compare. If I went back to work, they would have to pay me double what I made. Children grow up so fast as it is and you can go back to work when they are in school if you want or need to. We were jus talking that once both kids are in school all day I will go back and look for a part time job. However, if we see that it is not cost effective than I will quit. DH is worried that we will get back into the habit of spending money on eating out and take out and my extra money working will go for that and not college funds.
  9. Chicago526

    Chicago526 <font color=red>Any dream will do...<br><font colo

    May 6, 2003
    I'm not a SAHM (not even a mom, yet!) but the way I'd approch it is to make saving money my new full time job. Just by being home it will make things easier, you'll be able to cook from scratch, which is usually cheaper than eating out, and healthier too! You won't need nearly as many convienance products like juice boxes and individual snack packs, you'll have time to rinse out that sippy cup and put a handfull of crackers in a zip bag. You'll have time to sit down with the sale flyers to find the best deals and cut coupons. You can go to multiple stores for the best deals rather than do one-stop shoping. You can do all kinds of things, simply because you'll have the time to do it.

    My mother was SAHM until I started school, and I remember she had a schedule she stuck to. She'd dust on Monday, vacuum Tuesday, wash bedding on Wednesday (I don't know if that was her exact schedule, but you get the idea). It kept her orgainized, and this way she did a little house work each day, rather than spending one whole day just cleaning. And having a schedule just kept her more, I don't know, structured I guess.
  10. gottagodisney

    gottagodisney Mouseketeer

    Jan 10, 2005
    Congratulations!!! You will not regret your decision! Your child will thank you in so many ways over the years! Thank you for having the courage to make this break. So many people (escpecially women) think that a Mom HAS to work outside of the home in order to make it. My family is a living example that it can be done on one salary. I have been a SAHM for about 10 yrs. now and my husband is a truck driver. He drives locally and is home every night.

    The reality is that in order to drive new cars, buy whatever you want, live in a big or newer home with new furniture, etc. it might be that you have to work. If you choose your children over these things then it can be done. We have moved to a rural area where housing costs are much lower.

    I went back to work for about one year in order to pay some debt off (so I thought) and it was terrible. Every morning getting ready I dreaded it! You are right about the cost of working. When all was said and done, I practically paid to go to work. With gas, daycare, work clothes, going out to lunch with the group, increased taxes, convenience foods because I wasn't home to cook much, I barely made any money. This was a professional job in my field which requires a license.

    If you make some smart budgeting choices and cut back on spending you will be amazed at what you can accomplish!

    1. Plan out meals and buy generic
    2. Do not eat out (including fast food) much- plan for times when you will
    3. Make trips out in car inclusive - don't run out for one thing- try to get errands done in one trip.
    4. Utilize the library (free video/ dvd rentals)
    5. We eliminated cable about 1 yr. ago (kids watch PBS now) instead of junky cable shows. We have an antennae on the house = free!
    6. We bought a used very reliable van (Honda Odyssey) 8 years ago and are still driving it -185,000 miles and still running great.
    7. Make use of thrift stores for kids clothes and toys on occasions
    8. Go to sales at Old Navy, ect. or end of season with one size bigger for the following year.
    9. Pack lunches for hubby.
    10. DO NOT FEEL PRESSURED to be in the "IN" crowd with Mom's (new everything, trips, kids involved in every sport imaginable, ect.) Most of those people are either inherently wealthy or are living up to their eyeballs in debt!

    Bottom line is that Children do know the difference between their parents and a paid employee in the raising of them. No one else can love up your child as much as you and NO ONE can do a better job than you!! I can tell from your post that you can make this work- amen, and bless you and good wishes for your fabulous journey ahead!!
  11. LindyLouWho

    LindyLouWho I Can Fly!

    May 23, 2007
    I worked for 22yr at same company. Due to misfortuante events in my daughter's life, my husband & I took over custody of my than 6mo old granddaughter. I've always worked, even when my 3 children were small, but I'm enjoying the 1st time in my life without the outside pressure's, just staying at home to raise this child (she's 3yr now).
    Do I have regrets? Sure, but I've come to realize with my own children, that they grow up in a flash. This has been such an adventure for me, I'm not missing the 1st time to walk, talk, sing, dance, etc. What magic this is.

    Summary: Children don't stay in that category long, you can probably always obtain a new job, but you can't get the missed time with little one's back.
  12. Skatermom23

    Skatermom23 DIS Veteran

    Mar 11, 2004
    I have been a SAHM for 16 years! My greatest reward is when my son and daughter tell me how glad they are to have me home! This is coming from teenagers! Just take one day at a time and enjoy the moments!
  13. theparsons

    theparsons DIS Veteran

    Apr 22, 2007
  14. Julia M

    Julia M DIS Veteran<br><font color =red>not clever, not wi

    Jun 10, 2000
    There is a good book (get it from the library) called Miserly Moms, by Jonni McCoy, that will give you some good info

  15. mickeyfan2

    mickeyfan2 DIS Veteran

    May 21, 2004
    Talk to the coupon lady. She makes lots of money with her coupons.
  16. GJM

    GJM DIS Veteran

    Jul 20, 2003
    I just became a SAHM - my DS is 7 and in lst. grade. We made the move from NJ to SC which gave me this opportunity. Right now I don't miss working, it is so nice not rushing in the morning or rushing thru homework at night. And since we have no family in SC it is nice not to wonder who will watch him when there is no school.

    Come Sept. I may look for a PT job or try and do temp work, then when he isn't in school I won't work.
  17. PlaneJoy1

    PlaneJoy1 DIS Veteran

    Jan 28, 2005

    My DH and I are talking about doing the exact same thing. We hope we can payoff most everything in the next 18 months and make this a reality!!
  18. rhiansmom

    rhiansmom DIS Veteran

    Jan 27, 2004

    I just quit my job on Tuesday and I'm spending the summer at home with my DD. I'm a single parent and my job was our only income but I had been planning this for awhile and saved up enough to cover our expenses. I hated my job and have had 2 nights of wonderful sleep this week!

    I know that I'll be able to find something when school starts again so I'm a tad bit nervous.

    It may be hard but you have to have your priorities in order and it sounds like you do!
  19. eh24fan

    eh24fan <font color=blue>I was such a NKOTB nerd<br><font

    Mar 29, 2006
    I ended up becoming a SAHM after my son was born in January. The original plan was to go back to my FT job on a PT basis, then they (in reality, my not so nice really happy to find a way to get rid of me boss) decided that my job had to be FT...funny thing is, they just pawned it off on someone else. Nice huh? Anyway, I've been looking for a PT job for a few months now, but I'm being picky and that's ok because we agreed that I could. LOL My SO works 2nd shift and my nearly 7 year old has karate and right now baseball, in the fall flag football. Our goal is to find me a job where I can be home no later than 130pm so I'm home before SO leaves for work. Dream world? So far. LOL Things are pretty tight, but we are making it somehow on his pay.
  20. brandip22

    brandip22 Busy obsessing over my next trip!

    Jan 16, 2004
    Congrats! DH and I are also working to try to make that a reality for us! Hopefully, I can be in your shoes within the next two years, once the cars are paid off! That's all I work for- to pay for those!! You will love ever minute, I just know!
  21. tinaluis

    tinaluis DIS Veteran

    Jul 14, 2000
    If being home is what you want to do, then you can make it a priority and make it work for you. Sure, $$ will be a little tight, but it's worth it. DH left the workforce in 2001 to become a SAHD. We had two DDs and another one on the way. It's hard to believe that it's been 6 years. Time has flown by SOOOO fast. $$$ is sometimes tight, but we've managed just fine. Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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