Congratulations! I hear you on rekindling your interest in Disney by marrying into a Disney-loving family! I went once in high school for grad night and hated it.. didn't understand the big deal. I'm no help on the private dinners but you could always just find a more intimate dining experience in the more upscale restaurants. As for the pin, you can get them at the check-in desk or guest services in the parks. I love your idea of the Disneymoon sign too!