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Old 05-07-2005, 09:48 PM   #1
cruisnfamily
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What is an appropriate $$ gift for a Bat Mitzvah?(insp by the wedding gift thread)

This will be the first Bat Mitzvah I've gone to since I was 13 many years ago. I'm unsure what an appropriate $$ amount would be.

Background: DD and this little girl have known each other since they were 3years old. They were very close thru probably age 9 or so. Over the last few years they haven't gotten together as much but when they have it's all really comfy and we definitely feel like "old friends" with the family. Anyway, we knew since last year that DD would be invited to this event. When the invitation came, it was for OUR WHOLE FAMILY! We didn't expect this to be the case. DH and DS9 have decided not to attend so I RSVPed for just DD and I. So, what should we give?

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Old 05-07-2005, 10:03 PM   #2
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I think this goes as regional as weddings do...here you give as much as a wedding for a bar/bat mitzvah! And weddings here are big things...200 and up is par for the course gift wise.
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Old 05-07-2005, 10:04 PM   #3
cruisnfamily
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aprilgail2
I think this goes as regional as weddings do...here you give as much as a wedding for a bar/bat mitzvah! And weddings here are big things...200 and up is par for the course gift wise.
Wow! Nope, that would be much, much too much. We live in FL and I can guarantee you that's way more than the norm here.
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Old 05-07-2005, 10:14 PM   #4
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My kids received a range of amounts. Everywhere from $25-100. When my kids go to Bar/Bat Mitzvahs of friends (just them not our family) I usually give $36 (multiples of $18--the numeric value of Chai--to life). Seventy-two dollars seem to be a common amount for a couple of people or even a family.

Of course a lot depends on how much you can afford. Why did your DH and other child decide not to go? It's a fun time and a learning experience if your kids have never been.

Have fun! We still have two more to host (my younger kids are 11 and 5) and I'll be an expert by the time they are over. BTW, my 17yo DD's was the first one I ever attended ( I converted to Judaism) and I then realized what a meaningful time of a her life it was and just how much work she had put into that day.

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Old 05-08-2005, 01:16 PM   #5
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here on Long Island...

my older dd is 14 1/2 and younger dd is 12 1/2. older dd's bat mitzvah was 11/03, younger dd's bat mitzvah is 9/05.

one dd just finished "the circuit" and the other is on "the circuit", just went to a bat mizvah yesterday.

if dd is alone on the invitation I just give $50, which is the norm. if it's a very very close friend I give $75. when older dd statred the cirsuit I was giving $36, but that is below the norm.

if I am also invited (I'm single), I will give $100 to $150, depending on how close the families are.
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Old 05-08-2005, 02:37 PM   #6
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We currently live in the deep south where Bar/Bat Mitzvah usually gets 50.00 to 100.00 depending on the closeness of family. When we lived in Potomac, Md the price was greatly increased to 200.00 t0 250.00. If it's a family member.its usually double.Thats what we have found.
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Old 05-08-2005, 04:45 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rubyslipperlover
if dd is alone on the invitation I just give $50, which is the norm. if it's a very very close friend I give $75. when older dd statred the cirsuit I was giving $36, but that is below the norm.

if I am also invited (I'm single), I will give $100 to $150, depending on how close the families are.
OK, you are hearby invited to my son's Bar Mitzvah!


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Old 05-08-2005, 04:48 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tigger&Belle
OK, you are hearby invited to my son's Bar Mitzvah!


T&B

just tell me where and when.
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Old 05-08-2005, 05:22 PM   #9
cruisnfamily
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OK, so here I am in FL, listening to all these opinions.....and I still don't know how much to give. Would $54 be good(multiple of $18???would they "get" that?) or should I go with $50? Or more?

Decisions, decisions...I've also got a step-niece graduating high school in 2 weeks, don't know what to give her either. No party or anything, not attending the ceremony.

Boy, weddings are easier! We always give $100 for my DH and I and I've been told that's a pretty large gift from most everyone. At our wedding, 15 years ago, the largest gift we got was $100 and that was from DH's dad!
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