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Old 01-12-2014, 07:10 PM   #841
DisMom1981
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That's great! Hugs!

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August 2014 Trip Report (In progress) http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=3324325

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Old 01-12-2014, 07:34 PM   #842
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checking in..

just know i'm there with you giving hugs!!!
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Old 01-12-2014, 07:44 PM   #843
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Yay!! So glad the end is in sight for you, Josh and your Dad! Loved the towels and I'm sure your Dad did too. Have a safe trip tomorrow and hopefully you'll get a great night's sleep once you're home. Hugs to you.

Sandra: You've gained NO weight during pregnancy??? Wow! Will your diabetes go away after you give birth? I know nothing about gestational diabetes. (obviously) Keeping you in my prayers for a great delivery!
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Old 01-12-2014, 07:46 PM   #844
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Old 01-12-2014, 09:11 PM   #845
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Finally caught up from my last visit.
So sorry for all your added stress D. Glad in the end it seemed to work out for your dad.
The weather has been insane lately. It's either been freezing cold,snowing, raining or it's warm. The other day I took a good fall on the ice. I just sore, it could have been worse. That being said, I CANNOT WAIT FOR SUMMER!
Don't worry about your custom bags, everything will fall into place on getting done. Plus it's nice to know that everyone is understanding.

Even though I am not on here as much as I'd like to be, I think of you all and you all are in my prayers.
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Old 01-12-2014, 09:51 PM   #846
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D - So glad to see he's been moved in!!! Now hopefully you can relax (well as much as you can anyways!!)

Quote:
Originally Posted by disneychic2 View Post
Sandra: You've gained NO weight during pregnancy??? Wow! Will your diabetes go away after you give birth? I know nothing about gestational diabetes. (obviously) Keeping you in my prayers for a great delivery!
I gained 15 lbs between when we first found out I was pregnant in June 2013 and November 3 when I had my appointment with my nutritionist (we found out I have gestational diabetes right before Halloween.) I had to learn how to eat more healthy and keep my numbers under control or else they were going to put me on insulin (whether it be shots or oral medication I didn't want to take anything for it.) They told me it's normal to lose weight once you start eating more healthy which is exactly what happened (plus I was overweight before I got pregnant). I've lost the 15 lbs I've gained (plus some since the baby is growing just like he should be) and I'm back to where I was when I first got pregnant. The gestational diabetes should go away since I've been able to keep it under control and have lost weight. I won't know for sure though until 6 weeks after the baby is born (I go back in for the glucose testing and all that.) But most of the time it does go away. Thank you!! I'm ready for this baby to be here but I figure I have about another week to go before he decides to arrive (my due date is January 31.)
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Old 01-13-2014, 11:57 AM   #847
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Just checking in while I am "at work". I would rather check in on the Dis boards than do my work. Had to see how everything is going. Our internet at home is still horrible and couldn't check in on you this weekend. That's what we get for living so far out. Glad to see everything is going smoothly. I will be checking in when I can to see how you are this Monday. Like you said, you will have already done your workout for the week!

The towels are awesome! You are so thoughtful and put so much of yourself into your sewing. Prayers and hugs sent your way!
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Old 01-13-2014, 12:30 PM   #848
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I'm glad to hear that your dad is mostly moved into his new place. I haven't been around the DIS or FB much lately because my family had a busy weekend too - my younger brother got married on Saturday and my sons were the ring bearers. So it was a fun and crazy weekend.
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Old 01-13-2014, 01:27 PM   #849
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nikki7680 View Post
Joining! Popping over from Mo's thread! I have heard so many great things about you! Hoping I can meet you if/when you come to Chicago!!
First of all... Welcome! I didn't want you to think I missed your post.

************************************************** ********

As for the rest of you...

Just kidding...

I don't know what to say... I barely had any internet at my Dad's this weekend - but occasionally, I was able to sign in and see your notes of encouragement... Please know that each and every one of them meant the world to me.

My Dad's house was very sad... I cried many tears over the weekend. I am going through a lot of sad emotions and blaming myself for not seeing how he was living. I just feel like the worst person in the world, because even though Josh and I were doing our best to make sure he had the things he needed, we didn't SEE how he was living. No person should ever, ever have to live like that.

Going through his house, we found so much evidence of how sad and lonely he had become, and I blame myself for all of that. I should have been a better daughter, and I should have seen. But I didn't...

Over and over, through out the weekend, Victoria continued to tell me what a wonderful daughter I am to my Dad, and all I could see how I neglected him.

As BFF, Josh and the girls keep telling me... I cannot change the past, I cannot go back in time... Life for my dad will be much different in the future, and I am determined to do it myself if I have to.

He is in a much better place. He is somewhere where people can watch over him and make sure his basic needs are being met, that he is clean, fed and his medications are checked. Things that I just cannot do on a daily basis.

He is somewhere where he can be social and still enjoy his privacy. This is huge for him and a huge relief for me.

As I am slowly going through my dad's finances and taking over managing his life, and I continually asked by everyone he had contact with, how he is doing and a genuine care for his well being. I am shocked by how many people love him and enjoy him. I think he is shocked too...

Soooo... I just wanted to let you all know I am home... I couldn't have asked our weekend to go any better. There was so much sadness for me, and it was such an eye opening experience, I know that his living conditions did not happen over night, and it was a progressive thing... but wow... If any of you out there have parents that live alone, or you are unsure of their living conditions... I beg and URGE you to please step in and make it your business. Find out... Just because you visit and see their living areas - it is not enough... Open those closed doors (private bathrooms... bedrooms... fridges... cupboards/pantires... stoves...) and really LOOK. Please.

Prayers were sent up and prayers were answered, and I couldn't be any more thankful for all of my friends here and everywhere who lifted our family up during this time. It hasn't been easy, and it's been very stressful on all of us, but in the end, the outcome is good - very good - and worth all of it.

So, thank you... THANK YOU - from the very bottom of my heart. All of your thoughts and prayers mean the world to us.

D~

And... If you asked for my Dad's address - could you repost? I did not keep a running list. Thanks!
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Old 01-13-2014, 02:11 PM   #850
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Firstly, you cannot change the past and the best thing to do is move forward and not dwell on things that cannot be changed. You know that your Dad is in a place where he is going to be taken care of. Feel blessed for that and let the rest go.

Hugs my friend.

Yes, please send me your Dad's address.

T

I also wanted to add that I know how hard it is when your parent is so far away. Charlie's mom is in a nursing home on the other side of the state - 5 hours away from us. Thank goodness for his sister, who is there almost every day to check up on her. We do help out financially, but the rest is left up to his sister. It is hard on Charlie, but there is not much else we can do.
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Old 01-13-2014, 02:59 PM   #851
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Your family is right...you cannot change the past and you should not be so harsh on yourself. I am sure your dad knwos you did what you could when you could and he loves you all the same.

I'm glad the move went smoothly and I loved the pictures on FB.
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Old 01-13-2014, 08:54 PM   #852
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Your the best daughter you can be!! It is harder when your farther away and not able to see the every day things. All you can do is move forward and do what you can to make the changes you want now. The past can't be changed. Continued prayers for you and your family!
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Old 01-13-2014, 09:49 PM   #853
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It is so hard living apart from family. Look at all you have done to make sure your dad can retain and improve his privacy, comfort, social life, dignity, independence- while sill ensuring his health, well being and general needs are met. You are a damn good daughter- no one can be all knowing and perfect all of the time. Sending more hugs and prayers!

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August 2014 Trip Report (In progress) http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=3324325

Pre -Trip Report for August 2014
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=3215904

July 2012 Disney Fantasy
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Old 01-14-2014, 05:12 AM   #854
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Hugs D~!

Believe me, it is just as hard when the parent lives close to you! I lived less than 5 miles from my mom after my step father died. Looking back, I noticed some changes, but they were not strong enough to send out any real warning signals.

It wasn't until I went to pick her up for a shopping trip that I realized her house was much colder than it should be...digging, I found out her heat had been cut off for a couple weeks! I had been in her house each day during that time! She was good at covering things up.

We moved her in with us that afternoon...I went directly against my mother's wishes and I know I made her mad! I didn't giver her a choice. Cleaning out her house made me cry...and made me sick! This was NOT the mother I remembered!

I now know if we had not moved her she would not have made it much longer...she had decided a good way to save money was to take her meds once a week...and her memory was so bad she was skipping weeks...being a diabetic...this is NOT good!

You can't change what has happened. You can only remember it to make sure that you watch in the future. But then again, that is what history does...it is a teacher.

Much hugs and prayers! You ARE a good daughter....

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Old 01-14-2014, 05:56 AM   #855
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*hugs* for you, Dee. I'm so sorry for all these difficult things that you are dealing with. You have been doing a very good job of taking care of your own family, your daughters and husband, and that was very important to do. Even now that you know what you know and are able to move forward, you'll find that there are things you can't do anything about no matter how hard you try. Your father is still his own person and will still want some control over his life. At least he is safe now.
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