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Old 08-26-2013, 10:30 AM   #1
valbob89
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Is it an insult to give only the recommended tip amount?

Is it an insult to give only the recommended tip amount?

I don't know about the rest of the country, but people in San Francisco and most big cities are used to leaving between 15% and 20% of the total meal bill as a tip. It's the amount recommended by Miss Manners and Dear Abby, among others. Even at places like Denny's, if the service is adequate, we leave the recommended tip. If service has been extraordinary, or we asked for special consideration we will increase that amount. We have always followed this rule when cruising, leaving the recommended amount and increasing it when service was extraordinary or we asked for and received something beyond and above the routine.

The last time we were on a 7-day Disney cruise, we received the great service we have come to expect. As we are not demanding guests, and do not have children with us, we did not ask for anything extra nor did we receive it. We did not have alcohol with dinner nor did we ever ask for any changes to the menu items; we were very vanilla guests. Based on this, the night before our departure, we gave the recommended tip amount in the provided envelopes. We thanked everyone and expressed our appreciation for a great job, we had none nor made any complaints. Yet the next morning, at our departure breakfast, it was very clear our servers were upset with us, especially the assistant server -- not any of his other tables, just us. The only thing we could think was that we had offended them by only leaving the recommended amount. Are we mistaken in thinking that the majority of people leave the recommended amount and in assuming that it is the expected amount?
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Old 08-26-2013, 10:38 AM   #2
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Wow! I have never had this experience. We have always tipped the recommended amount, and our servers have always seemed very happy with us the next morning. Indeed, we have seen servers on later trips and they have made a point of saying hi to us.

Frankly, based on discussions around the DIS boards, I think tipping less than the suggested amount might be more common than tipping more than the suggested amount. That is a total guess, so don't count on it.

Really, I think tipping the suggested amount is very reasonable. If you are nervous about a repeat of your last experience, I suggest handing them the envelope at your final breakfast, as you are finishing!

Very sorry to hear that happened.
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Old 08-26-2013, 10:42 AM   #3
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That's rude (in reference to your servers). My friend and I are the same way when it comes to normal restaurant tipping: if they did their job, they get normal %age, if they were better (like prompt or really friendly) they get a higher percentage. The CMs have no right to be upset since they did in fact get a tip (I do wonder if some people don't at all). I think it's purely personal if you decide to tip more--and like you said you didn't request anything/order alcohol (which would almost demand an extra tip), IMHO I think you were right.

I'm interested to see what others have to say though
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Old 08-26-2013, 10:47 AM   #4
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We usually tip the recommended amount too, don't drink alcohol, and are mostly "vanilla" guests like you. We've never been treated any different the last morning.
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Old 08-26-2013, 10:53 AM   #5
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I agree with you completely! We tip the recommended amount, but quite honestly, I feel that is still a generous tip. I have to budget very carefully to make a disney cruise or disney vacation a reality, so even the recommended tip is a bit of a stretch (I still do it, of course, but I would hope the servers will appreciate it and not give me attitude about it).

Maybe they loved you so much, they just didn`t want to see you go home and that is why they were treating you differently......
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Old 08-26-2013, 11:02 AM   #6
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I'm surprised and dismayed that you had that experience with your servers. Perhaps there were other reasons they were "out of sorts"?

In my opinion, a tip is earned by the level of service delivered. As a rule, I tip the standard amount even when the service was poor (on DCL anyway) but I almost always give additional tips to those who I found made our stay more magical or were exceptional.

I think that there are many people who either don't tip or reduce the auto-gratuity and they don't necessarily understand that the tips are part of the income for those positions which are underpaid compared to other non-tipped positions. However, you shouldn't be treated differently based on tip, the service level should be consistent.
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Old 08-26-2013, 11:04 AM   #7
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Many report this behavior the last morning. Because of this some do not return to the MDR's for breakfast the last morning.

Some explain it by saying that turn around day is difficult and demanding, and perhaps they have seen their tip sheet total, which may be less than anticipated. That disappointment then can be seen and possibly portrayed to all their customers/pax. In your case where they seemed to be happy with others and not you, it does make you wonder. I know I too would come to the same conclusions.

IMO this is another reason if tipping standard amount to not give them the envelopes the last night. They will still get the tips if charged to to your onboard account. Just say you forgot them in the cabin.
Does anyone know for sure exactly when the CMs would get to see their tip sheet total? Is it before debark? I do know it does have the lead name, cabin #, and amount, so the CM"s will know who tipped what.
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Old 08-26-2013, 11:06 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by natandscott View Post
....Maybe they loved you so much, they just didn`t want to see you go home and that is why they were treating you differently......
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Old 08-26-2013, 11:50 AM   #9
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I would've asked them if there was a problem? That's just how I am. 1 of 2 things would've happened. 1. They would have told me what the issue was(highly unlikely), or 2. They would have said that there was no problem and adjusted their demeanor to "appear" as if everything was ok. Either way, they would've known that their demeanor was affecting me in a negative manner.

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Old 08-26-2013, 11:56 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by valbob89 View Post
Is it an insult to give only the recommended tip amount?

I don't know about the rest of the country, but people in San Francisco and most big cities are used to leaving between 15% and 20% of the total meal bill as a tip. It's the amount recommended by Miss Manners and Dear Abby, among others. Even at places like Denny's, if the service is adequate, we leave the recommended tip. If service has been extraordinary, or we asked for special consideration we will increase that amount. We have always followed this rule when cruising, leaving the recommended amount and increasing it when service was extraordinary or we asked for and received something beyond and above the routine.

The last time we were on a 7-day Disney cruise, we received the great service we have come to expect. As we are not demanding guests, and do not have children with us, we did not ask for anything extra nor did we receive it. We did not have alcohol with dinner nor did we ever ask for any changes to the menu items; we were very vanilla guests. Based on this, the night before our departure, we gave the recommended tip amount in the provided envelopes. We thanked everyone and expressed our appreciation for a great job, we had none nor made any complaints. Yet the next morning, at our departure breakfast, it was very clear our servers were upset with us, especially the assistant server -- not any of his other tables, just us. The only thing we could think was that we had offended them by only leaving the recommended amount. Are we mistaken in thinking that the majority of people leave the recommended amount and in assuming that it is the expected amount?
It certainly isn't an insult to only tip the recommended amount.

While I really don't know what happened, I've read reports that this sort "attitude" sometimes happens. There could be many reasons for it. Among them, the servers may have just found out that their contract hasn't been renewed, or they've been up all night (after dinner service they have lots of other things they are assigned to do to start the turnaround process for the next morning), or they only had 2 hours sleep as they have to get up early enough to clear immigration before they can even start their day, and this can take a while. As suggested, maybe they're a bit upset that the cruise is over, also? Maybe they're upset that they didn't do enough for you (in their estimation) in order to increase the tip.

The recommended amount is exactly what the tips should be. I'm not sure when they find out who tipped and how much, so I don't know for sure that they even knew at breakfast what their tips are.
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Old 08-26-2013, 12:16 PM   #11
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On every cruise ive been on, the atmosphere of the last breakfast thing is usually hurried and rushed and decidedly less magical. I'm sorry you felt so fled out but I don't think the standard tip is an insult and I would write it off to staff being preoccupied with the super stressful day ahead of them?
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Old 08-26-2013, 12:39 PM   #12
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No, it shouldn't be an insult, that's why it's recommended.

The departure breakfast is VERY rushed because they have to turn the entire dining room over again as soon as it's done.
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Old 08-26-2013, 12:41 PM   #13
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For us, wherever we go we always tip 20% unless the service is bad. However, when a restaurant or the cruise line charges me automatically that's all they get. IMO if someone is going to tell me how much to tip, then that's what they'll get, but if they leave it up to me they almost always get more. If the servers were upset at getting only what DCL automatically charges then they should be upset at DCL, not you. Before DCL charged tips automatically I always left more.
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Old 08-26-2013, 12:42 PM   #14
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This is why we never have the last morning dining room breakfast, it is rushed, hurried and the magic isn't there. I suspect it wasn't to do with the recommended tip, just the business of turnaround day.

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Old 08-26-2013, 12:44 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mjaclyn View Post
For us, wherever we go we always tip 20% unless the service is bad. However, when a restaurant or the cruise line charges me automatically that's all they get. IMO if someone is going to tell me how much to tip, then that's what they'll get, but if they leave it up to me they almost always get more. If the servers were upset at getting only what DCL automatically charges then they should be upset at DCL, not you. Before DCL charged tips automatically I always left more.
DCL doesn't TELL you what to tip. They suggest a certain amount. Unlike other cruiselines, you can go and have the auto-gratuities removed from your onboard account. And tip as you wish.
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