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Old 07-18-2013, 07:24 PM   #1
CraftyMommy
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Refusing Tips...kind of a long story

My husband texted me today and asked if I could stop at his office on my way home from class. I replied, "Sure, what's up?" Then he tells me his secretary is going on a Disney cruise and has some questions. Oh dear! Here we go. Why does this lady do this to me? She asked me for tons of info when her family went to WDW. It was everyone's first trip and I went out of my way to answer her questions, explain the dining plan, all the different packages vs. ala carte pricing of tickets/rooms, etc. She ended up buying the DDP and they stayed at AKL. I knew she would have issues with AKL being "out of the way" because she's just that type of person. Guess what? That was her first complaint when they got back. Why didn't I warn her that AKL was so far away? Well, I did but she doesn't remember me warning her. She conveniently forgets things when she is wrong. They never made any ADR's because they didn't want to have their vacation scheduled. They ended up paying out of pocket for counter service meals because the sit-downs had no availability. They didn't even ask if they could use their sit-down credits at the quick service locations. I think they could have, but not 100% on that. Anyway, they ignored most of the advice I gave them. Why ask for my advice if you're going to act like my advice is not good enough for you? They came back and said the trip was horrible. Since they paid out of pocket for most of their meals, never used their snack credits either. They went to the parks at the most crowded times and refused to do FastPass because they didn't want to be tied down to riding it at a particular time. Instead they just waited in lines for 60+ minutes? Alright, your way is better I guess? She came back and kept telling my husband how much I was wasting our money and that he should insist we go somewhere else instead of Disney places for vacation. I was furious when he told me that. He just shrugs her off. He doesn't take her seriously. He never takes anything personal. He just treats her like the lady that keeps him organized and doesn't really care what she says to him. I, however, take her little jabs personally. She knows she can bother me, so I don't know why I ever bother to talk to her.

So I go into the office and she tells me their cruise is in 2 weeks. Well, can't really help you out much with that! After asking a couple preliminary questions I realized she is set in her ways and doesn't care to hear about Palo, Remy, the kids clubs (because she knows her kids would have a horrible time in a nasty daycare). They're flying in the morning of debarkation. Ok, good luck with your flights! Any tip I tried to give her she would come up with a reason why it wouldn't work for her or why my way was wrong. I don't know why I subject myself to this, seriously. Then the subject of money came up and I told her about the onboard cashless system. She said they'd use a credit card. Each family member had a set spending budget and they weren't going a penny over. Don't forget cash for tips. Oh dear...here's where the conversation got tense real quickly. She does not believe in tipping. She is anti tipping because society should not obligate you into giving extra money that is not a direct charge for service. If we are obligated, then "gratuities" should be renamed as "mandatories." Her words, not mine!

Dis-friends, please don't start a debate here about whether we should/shouldn't tip. I told her about the servers, stateroom hosts, etc working for tips and not getting a regular salary. She said it was their stupidity for accepting a job with no paycheck. I tried to change her mind but she just started getting really snarky and rude. I let her know the gratuities are automatically charged to their onboard account and that she would have to go to Guest Services to have them removed. She was more than ok with that. Knowing her, she'll have quite an attitude when she asks for them to be removed too.

So it got me to wondering. What is going to happen when the servers come around on the last night expecting envelopes, cash, or whatever. Do they come out and ask for the tips if you don't hand them over? I seriously want to be a fly on the wall if anyone so much as hints for a gratuity from her. It might be quite the spectacle. Do the crew get upset if they're stiffed? I know I'd get miffed if my salary was counting on it.

After they get back from the cruise I know she'll make up a reason for me to stop in the office where she'll proceed to tell me again how awful her cruise was and that she should have known better for giving Disney her money, followed up with more lectures for me not to waste my husband's money on that evil company.

Again, I don't want to start any debate in regards to anti/pro tipping, I'm just curious how the Cast Members handle those situations when people refuse to give even a cent towards a gratuity?

Last edited by CraftyMommy; 07-18-2013 at 07:35 PM. Reason: typo's
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:29 PM   #2
cmesq61
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If the tips are added automatically to my bill doesn't that mean I'm not handing out envelopes?
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:32 PM   #3
PrincessShmoo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CraftyMommy View Post
My husband texted me today and asked if I could stop at his office on my way home from class. I replied, "Sure, what's up?" Then he tells me his secretary is going on a Disney cruise and has some questions. Oh dear! Here we go. Why does this lady do this to me? She asked me for tons of info when her family went to WDW. It was everyone's first trip and I went out of my way to answer her questions, explain the dining plan, all the different packages vs. ala carte pricing of tickets/rooms, etc. She ended up buying the DDP and they stayed at AKL. I knew she would have issues with AKL being "out of the way" because she's just that type of person. Guess what? That was her first complaint when they got back. Why didn't I warn her that AKL was so far away? Well, I did but she doesn't remember me warning her. She conveniently forgets things when she is wrong. They never made any ADR's because they didn't want to have their vacation scheduled. They ended up paying out of pocket for counter service meals because the sit-downs had no availability. They didn't even ask if they could use their sit-down credits at the quick service locations. I think they could have, but not 100% on that. Anyway, they ignored most of the advice I gave them. Why ask for my advice if you're going to act like my advice is not good enough for you? They came back and said the trip was horrible. Since they paid out of pocket for most of their meals, never used their snack credits either. They went to the parks at the most crowded times and refused to do FastPass because they didn't want to be tied down to riding it at a particular time. Instead they just waited in lines for 60+ minutes? Alright, your way is better I guess? She came back and kept telling my husband how much I was wasting our money and that he should insist we go somewhere else instead of Disney places for vacation. I was furious when he told me that. He just shrugs her off. He doesn't take her seriously. He never takes anything personal. He just treats her like the lady that keeps him organized and doesn't really care what she says to him. I, however, take her little jabs personally. She knows she can bother me, so I don't know why I ever bother to talk to her.

So I go into the office and she tells me their cruise is in 2 weeks. Well, can't really help you out much with that! After asking a couple preliminary questions I realized she is set in her ways and doesn't care to hear about Palo, Remy, the kids clubs (because she knows her kids would have a horrible time in a nasty daycare). They're flying in the morning of debarkation. Ok, good luck with your flights! Any tip I tried to give her she would come up with a reason why it wouldn't work for her or why my way was wrong. I don't know why I subject myself to this, seriously. Then the subject of money came up and I told her about the onboard cashless system. She said they'd use a credit card. Each family member had a set spending budget and they weren't going a penny over. Don't forget cash for tips. Oh dear...here's where the conversation got tense real quickly. She does not believe in tipping. She is anti tipping because society should not obligate you into giving extra money that is not a direct charge for service. If we are obligated, then "gratuities" should be renamed as "mandatories."

Please don't start a debate here about whether we should/shouldn't tip. I told her about the servers, stateroom hosts, etc working for tips and not getting a regular salary. She said it was their stupidity for accepting a job with no paycheck. I tried to change her mind but she just started getting really snarky and rude. I let her know the gratuities are automatically charged to their onboard account and that she would have to go to Guest Services to have them removed. She was more than ok with that. Knowing her, she'll have quite an attitude when she asks for them to be removed too.

So it got me to wondering. What is going to happen when the servers come around on the last night expecting envelopes, cash, or whatever. Do they come out and ask for the tips if you don't hand them over? I seriously want to be a fly on the wall if anyone so much as hints for a gratuity from her. It might be quite the spectacle. Do the crew get upset if they're stiffed? I know I'd get miffed if my salary was counting on it.

Again, I don't want to start any debate in regards to anti/pro tipping, I'm just curious how the Cast Members handle those situations.
In our experience the CMs do not come around with hands out for tips/envelopes. Most of the time I've had to offer it first before they would even reach for it.

Unfortunately, there are people who do remove the tips and don't show up the last night or for breakfast the last morning, for just that reason - don't want to tip. CMs are aware that some people are like that. They will most likely not appreciate being cut off, but it won't be the first (or last) time. And she won't be the only one stiffing them.
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:33 PM   #4
cruisecrasher
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I will say on the flip side, I've tracked down my head server to make sure he received his tip (he was busy helping another table and the kids were getting restless.) I wanted to make sure he personally got it as we add cash (he was super helpful with my allergy kids.)
My guess is they'll assume they just forgot their envelopes. With auto gratuity, they have no way of knowing you didn't tip.
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:34 PM   #5
PrincessShmoo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cmesq61 View Post
If the tips are added automatically to my bill doesn't that mean I'm not handing out envelopes?
At the end of the cruise, everyone will receive tip coupons and envelopes in their rooms with the nightly turndown service. On each coupon is the name, position, and amount of tip. They are 2 part. You tear the coupon in half, place it in the corresponding envelope (along with any additional cash, if you wish) and hand them out.

You don't have to do this, as the CMs will get the tips anyway. But it's a nice way to say goodbye and thanks in person. Some people report that their kids like doing the handing out of tips.
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:36 PM   #6
cmesq61
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PrincessShmoo View Post

At the end of the cruise, everyone will receive tip coupons and envelopes in their rooms with the nightly turndown service. On each coupon is the name, position, and amount of tip. They are 2 part. You tear the coupon in half, place it in the corresponding envelope (along with any additional cash, if you wish) and hand them out.

You don't have to do this, as the CMs will get the tips anyway. But it's a nice way to say goodbye and thanks in person. Some people report that their kids like doing the handing out of tips.
So glad I asked...I had no idea!
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:37 PM   #7
CraftyMommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cruisecrasher View Post
My guess is they'll assume they just forgot their envelopes. With auto gratuity, they have no way of knowing you didn't tip.
Oh darn! I would have loved to be a fly on the wall when she made a spectacle of herself. That woman just irritates me.
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:38 PM   #8
daisywithak
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The envelopes aren't really necessary, the servers will get the gratuity anyway. A lot of people don't know that they're supposed to hand the envelope to the servers on the last night. The two other couples that we ate with didn't know and therefore didn't bring them. Anyway, the servers don't ask for the envelopes or even hint around for them. They just act very grateful when they get them.
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:39 PM   #9
maspaws
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I'm confused also, is this in addition to the automatic tip?
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:40 PM   #10
Zeppelin
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CraftyMommy View Post
My husband texted me today and asked if I could stop at his office on my way home from class. I replied, "Sure, what's up?" Then he tells me his secretary is going on a Disney cruise and has some questions. Oh dear! Here we go. Why does this lady do this to me? She asked me for tons of info when her family went to WDW. It was everyone's first trip and I went out of my way to answer her questions, explain the dining plan, all the different packages vs. ala carte pricing of tickets/rooms, etc. She ended up buying the DDP and they stayed at AKL. I knew she would have issues with AKL being "out of the way" because she's just that type of person. Guess what? That was her first complaint when they got back. Why didn't I warn her that AKL was so far away? Well, I did but she doesn't remember me warning her. She conveniently forgets things when she is wrong. They never made any ADR's because they didn't want to have their vacation scheduled. They ended up paying out of pocket for counter service meals because the sit-downs had no availability. They didn't even ask if they could use their sit-down credits at the quick service locations. I think they could have, but not 100% on that. Anyway, they ignored most of the advice I gave them. Why ask for my advice if you're going to act like my advice is not good enough for you? They came back and said the trip was horrible. Since they paid out of pocket for most of their meals, never used their snack credits either. They went to the parks at the most crowded times and refused to do FastPass because they didn't want to be tied down to riding it at a particular time. Instead they just waited in lines for 60+ minutes? Alright, your way is better I guess? She came back and kept telling my husband how much I was wasting our money and that he should insist we go somewhere else instead of Disney places for vacation. I was furious when he told me that. He just shrugs her off. He doesn't take her seriously. He never takes anything personal. He just treats her like the lady that keeps him organized and doesn't really care what she says to him. I, however, take her little jabs personally. She knows she can bother me, so I don't know why I ever bother to talk to her.

So I go into the office and she tells me their cruise is in 2 weeks. Well, can't really help you out much with that! After asking a couple preliminary questions I realized she is set in her ways and doesn't care to hear about Palo, Remy, the kids clubs (because she knows her kids would have a horrible time in a nasty daycare). They're flying in the morning of debarkation. Ok, good luck with your flights! Any tip I tried to give her she would come up with a reason why it wouldn't work for her or why my way was wrong. I don't know why I subject myself to this, seriously. Then the subject of money came up and I told her about the onboard cashless system. She said they'd use a credit card. Each family member had a set spending budget and they weren't going a penny over. Don't forget cash for tips. Oh dear...here's where the conversation got tense real quickly. She does not believe in tipping. She is anti tipping because society should not obligate you into giving extra money that is not a direct charge for service. If we are obligated, then "gratuities" should be renamed as "mandatories." Her words, not mine!

Dis-friends, please don't start a debate here about whether we should/shouldn't tip. I told her about the servers, stateroom hosts, etc working for tips and not getting a regular salary. She said it was their stupidity for accepting a job with no paycheck. I tried to change her mind but she just started getting really snarky and rude. I let her know the gratuities are automatically charged to their onboard account and that she would have to go to Guest Services to have them removed. She was more than ok with that. Knowing her, she'll have quite an attitude when she asks for them to be removed too.

So it got me to wondering. What is going to happen when the servers come around on the last night expecting envelopes, cash, or whatever. Do they come out and ask for the tips if you don't hand them over? I seriously want to be a fly on the wall if anyone so much as hints for a gratuity from her. It might be quite the spectacle. Do the crew get upset if they're stiffed? I know I'd get miffed if my salary was counting on it.

After they get back from the cruise I know she'll make up a reason for me to stop in the office where she'll proceed to tell me again how awful her cruise was and that she should have known better for giving Disney her money, followed up with more lectures for me not to waste my husband's money on that evil company.

Again, I don't want to start any debate in regards to anti/pro tipping, I'm just curious how the Cast Members handle those situations when people refuse to give even a cent towards a gratuity?
sounds like a fun woman....

to answer your question- i've never seen a server, stateroom host, etc ask for a tip- then again that's cause everyone hands over the envelopes with at least a tip ticket in it....it'll be real fun to know what happens the last morning if they go to their main dining room for breakfast!!!

you know what i hope happens to this woman who's already decided she's "not going to tip"? i hope she doesn't notice the tip expense on her room bill until she's walked off the ship....keep us posted...
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:41 PM   #11
PrincessShmoo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maspaws View Post
I'm confused also, is this in addition to the automatic tip?
What "this" are you referring to?
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Panama Canal; Alaska; Med; WB Transatlantic; Mexican Riviera; Hawaii; Baja CA; Bahamas; Eastern/Western Caribbean

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Old 07-18-2013, 07:46 PM   #12
Zeppelin
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maspaws View Post
I'm confused also, is this in addition to the automatic tip?
my guess is no- the woman seems like a cranky individual and wants to leave $0.00 as a tip...
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:46 PM   #13
allformyboys
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"this" is a receipt saying you paid your tip and you put in a envelope and hand to the server/room attendant. I usually add extra cash in the envelope if they are really good
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:47 PM   #14
Zeppelin
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"this" is a receipt saying you paid your tip and you put in a envelope and hand to the server/room attendant. I usually add extra cash in the envelope if they are really good
so do i but i think the "this" is in reference to the extra cash on top of the tip ticket.....
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Old 07-18-2013, 07:56 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cmesq61 View Post
If the tips are added automatically to my bill doesn't that mean I'm not handing out envelopes?
You still get vouchers and tip envelopes. You put the vouchers in the envelopes and hand them out to the specific people you are tipping.

MJ
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