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Old 06-25-2013, 02:53 PM   #76
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Quote:
Originally Posted by roomthreeseventeen View Post
Pretty much everywhere, but here is page 16:

As the State Supreme Court read §§1912(d) and (f ), a biological Indian father could abandon his child in utero and refuse any support for the birth
mother—perhaps contributing to the mother’s decision to put the child up for adoption—and then could play his ICWA trump card at the eleventh hour to override the mother’s decision and the child’s best interests
The supreme court said that this is how it could be used not that that is how this father used it. They didn't take custody away from him but they overturned the decision that he has custody because of ICWA. Now, Veronica will be spending another year with her dad and her family-all watching the shadows as they won't know what the next day brings. The courts do not move fast. Hopefully- they will realize that because of the biological relationship and that he has proven that he can be a good dad- they family will stay intact-maybe they can bridge a relationship with the prospective adoptive family so that they can have visitation.

As for "not supporting the mother" she refused support from him and his mother. The paps- because the adoption was never finalized- are the ones who were using South Carolina legislation showing that a father has to support the mother during the pregnancy if he wants paternity rights. If the mother refuses- what recourse does a father have?

Agencies are in this for the money. They advertise, enticing mothers to adoption. They offer 'scholarships' and support or threaten mothers with huge bills after making the mothers go to physicians that the agency is associated with when she decides not to place the child. In many cases, agencies encourage mothers not to include fathers- they teach them how to keep him out of it. This agency and others have also encouraged and transported mothers to give birth in Utah where it is next to impossible for an out of state father to file his paternity rights in time. (there are 6 pending lawsuits regarding just that) This is all about the money that the agency makes.

In this case- Dustin was an idiot and so was the mother. They broke up and didn't deal with it very well. For goodness sakes- they are very young. Why does each state have a different period of time that a parent can change their mind? In FL- if the child is UNDER 6 months old- a parent can't. That's because the infant is the most valuable product. He filed the paperwork as soon as he could and used what was available to him because this country is in favor of adoption by financial stature and not what is in the best interest of the child. The agency even warned the Capobiancos that there was a problem with the paternity relinquishment but they went ahead. They retained custody even after he filed his rights. They were just wrong- and they are wrong in continuing to fight.

If this country could look to a national adoption law and paternity registry- it would keep cases like this from happening and make good adoptions go smoother. Look towards the Model Adoption Act of 1980 - it should be a law. It would take the money out of adoption and recreate what adoption was supposed to be- a social service in the best interest of a child in need of a family.
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Old 06-25-2013, 03:13 PM   #77
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Wow, that was a lot of reading- I had heard nothing of this until I opened this thread this morning. As a adopted (who oddly when I found my birthmother found out I was 50% Cree) feels incredibly for the child here, honestly I think that is where the court went wrong -and a lot of people forget to look. So many adoptees have attachment disorders, and that is from a "regular" adoption, I can not even begin to imagine the damage this little one is going to have to deal with being shuffled back and forth like this. That like others have said is not love. I am so sad for her -and all the others involved in this. It is a bit hard to glean what is the truth in this, but will continue to read what follows.
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Old 06-25-2013, 03:19 PM   #78
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Really?
She has posted about this case before and seems oddly invested in it for some reason. I just cannot imagine how someone would wish death on someone else like that.
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Old 06-25-2013, 03:28 PM   #79
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I just want to chime in here to say that it is TRUE that many adoption agencies DO counsel women on ways to keep the fathers out of the know until after the grace period is over.
It is in the adoption agencies best interest to have the mother on their side and keep the dad out of the picture. I have seen this OFTEN with women in my field (and have also seen many cases where the adoption agencies really try to drive a wedge between a girl and her family, so that the girl will decide to adopt, but that is a different story), but do some research and you can see for yourself. It happens a LOT.
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Old 06-25-2013, 03:52 PM   #80
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I am so infuriated that the judges have so completely trampled on the rights of Fathers all the laws on adoption are designed to protect these who want to buy a baby and not protect the children there is research that shows indian children adopted away from their culture suffer but this repulsive pair want to damage the little girl so badly they already tried to do it when they put her through this it makes me wonder what are the mans intention to the child loving or sexual.
Wow. You are completely over the top to suggest that an adoptive father's intent towards a daughter is sexual because they are fighting to keep her. You seem to be pretty obsessed with this case.

Do you know these people to have such strong feelings about the individuals? I understand having strong views toward one viewpoint but to have such hatred towards the individuals is unsettling.
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Old 06-25-2013, 04:03 PM   #81
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PaulaSB12

I am so infuriated that the judges have so completely trampled on the rights of Fathers all the laws on adoption are designed to protect these who want to buy a baby and not protect the children there is research that shows indian children adopted away from their culture suffer but this repulsive pair want to damage the little girl so badly they already tried to do it when they put her through this it makes me wonder what are the mans intention to the child loving or sexual.
My biological children are way more Native American than this child (1/16th Cherokee) and they've never even been to a reservation nor a casino for that matter, I guess they are suffering too. Not to mention my DH, who is 1/8 Cherokee, he's been to a casino, that counts right? And "all the laws on adoption are designed to protect these who want to buy a baby" what planet are you on? Each state has different laws regarding adoption, each state, different laws. I want to see this research on "indian children" suffering when adopted away from their culture, please provide some links to this research.
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Old 06-25-2013, 04:23 PM   #82
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Another sad tale.............
IMHO..

I am all for adoption.


I am also all for accurate information being filed in legal proceedings....like allegedly ...accidentally MISspelling the biological fathers name and therefore not notifying him of the adoption in a timely manner....that should Not be disregarded....
I dont think that the adoptive parents....who knew of the issues right away within weeks of the fathers petition......and weeks of the childs birth did the right thing by NOT turning that child over at that point...
They should not then Try and USE that same custody/possession of that child to gain an advantage or use it as a pawn. Had the child been put first at that very point in time, the not yet formalized adoption/, adoptive parents would have had that child for weeks when she/baby would have had LESS separation anxiety and likely LESS future issues.
The long drawn out legal battles are not in the best interest of the child.... so keeping that child at that point was emotional and not about the child, rather it was about the adoptive parents wanting that child for their own...........but it wasnt ...

My heart breaks for that child who will once again be tossed about.

I am also saddened for the adoptive parents...who surely love this child that was not born of them... I think that they wanted a child so badly that it was the focus.....but they knew that she was wanted by her biological parent ..
That same parent who was then forced to fight thru the court system to get his daughter back.....

So, No, Im not happy for this alleged "win" for them, and ultimately it is certainly no win for this now older child who may at some point be torn from her father and actual blood relations ...........those she has grown up with and now bonded with.......

the CHILD should be put first....and the decision today is SAD to me
I pray that All the adults involved can come to some way to have an open relationship so that the child can see the family that wanted to adopt her, but she should remain where she is, with her dad..
Its just My opinion................and yes, we're all entitles to one..
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Old 06-25-2013, 04:57 PM   #83
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Originally Posted by Allison View Post
Wow. You are completely over the top to suggest that an adoptive father's intent towards a daughter is sexual because they are fighting to keep her. You seem to be pretty obsessed with this case.

Do you know these people to have such strong feelings about the individuals? I understand having strong views toward one viewpoint but to have such hatred towards the individuals is unsettling.
I am infuriated in the wy this couple have behaved and quite frankly I do doubt his desire to own a little indian girl. What if they get her are they going to say sorry honey I know you love your daddy but we paid for you so you are here to do what we want you to. The whole way they acted putting her in a front of a mob shows tey are unfit nd the battle is not over yet
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Old 06-25-2013, 05:04 PM   #84
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I am infuriated in the wy this couple have behaved and quite frankly I do doubt his desire to own a little indian girl. What if they get her are they going to say sorry honey I know you love your daddy but we paid for you so you are here to do what we want you to. The whole way they acted putting her in a front of a mob shows tey are unfit nd the battle is not over yet
You wished death on them. That is extreme.
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Old 06-25-2013, 05:14 PM   #85
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The case is going back they havent won yet and I really hope someone kills them first.
Really? You are wishing death on people you do not know, and in relation to what is an emotionally charged case, with plenty of rhetoric to go around on both sides? That to me is completely reprehensible.

Are you personally connected to someone in the case? You really seem exceptionally invested in this.
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Old 06-25-2013, 06:12 PM   #86
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Originally Posted by PaulaSB12 View Post
I am infuriated in the wy this couple have behaved and quite frankly I do doubt his desire to own a little indian girl. What if they get her are they going to say sorry honey I know you love your daddy but we paid for you so you are here to do what we want you to. The whole way they acted putting her in a front of a mob shows tey are unfit nd the battle is not over yet
"Own a little Indian girl". WHAT THE HECK???? My dd is adopted from a culture different that dh or mine. She's our child not our property. We adopted her, we didn't buy her. Talk about being offensive and bigoted.

As for the amount of na blood it takes to be considered part of the tribe I'm astounded. My ancestors were here just after the mayflower. I could very well have a bit of na blood in me. The na leaders might want to be careful what precedent they're setting. People might start coming out in droves to stake a claim on casino royalties.
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Old 06-25-2013, 06:16 PM   #87
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Originally Posted by PaulaSB12 View Post
I am infuriated in the wy this couple have behaved and quite frankly I do doubt his desire to own a little indian girl. What if they get her are they going to say sorry honey I know you love your daddy but we paid for you so you are here to do what we want you to. The whole way they acted putting her in a front of a mob shows tey are unfit nd the battle is not over yet
Our adopted daughter is part Samoan. We adopted her because we wanted a baby not because we wanted to "own" a Samoan child.

By the way, I don't know if people in England buy their children when adopting but that's not the way it's done in the US. We paid for our daughter's birth mother's medical expenses-period. It is illegal here to buy a person.
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Old 06-25-2013, 08:09 PM   #88
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This is not a win for the adoptive parents. At least not yet.

This ruling did not take custody away from the father. The state of SC now has to re-look at the custody without using the Native American laws to see if he still should have custody. The dad has not lost custody yet.

And the article I read said that if the state does strip the dad's custody, the child still does not automatically go back to the adoptive parents. Basically she will go back into the system and there will be a period where relatives and even the tribe could petition for custody. Only after all those are exhausted, will the would-be adoptive parents looked at again.
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Old 06-25-2013, 08:17 PM   #89
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Poohforyou View Post
"Own a little Indian girl". WHAT THE HECK???? My dd is adopted from a culture different that dh or mine. She's our child not our property. We adopted her, we didn't buy her. Talk about being offensive and bigoted.

As for the amount of na blood it takes to be considered part of the tribe I'm astounded. My ancestors were here just after the mayflower. I could very well have a bit of na blood in me. The na leaders might want to be careful what precedent they're setting. People might start coming out in droves to stake a claim on casino royalties.
Don't get her started on international adoption. She may just go off like a Roman candle. From past posts, she has a major issue with adoption in general and has posted at length regarding how awful international adoptions are. Wishing someone dead? Not a surprise.....
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Old 06-25-2013, 08:39 PM   #90
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This is not a win for the adoptive parents. At least not yet.

This ruling did not take custody away from the father. The state of SC now has to re-look at the custody without using the Native American laws to see if he still should have custody. The dad has not lost custody yet.

And the article I read said that if the state does strip the dad's custody, the child still does not automatically go back to the adoptive parents. Basically she will go back into the system and there will be a period where relatives and even the tribe could petition for custody. Only after all those are exhausted, will the would-be adoptive parents looked at again.
If SC cannot use Native American laws, how could they be considered?
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