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Old 06-21-2013, 02:35 PM   #151
NHdisneylover
Lanyards are taking all my poor organizatioanl skills
mice and such creatures tend to like to travel aorund
 
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Heidelberg, Germany (formally from New Hampshire)
Posts: 14,213

OP--people seem to often keep reading even after they say they are one--so I will reply to you in case that is happening here

I want you to know that I really did not intend to be mean or hurtful at all.

I gather from your old posts that your son is very important to you. I think you love him beyond measure and that you would never intentionally do anyhting that is damaging to him.

In much the same way that, prior to this thread, you apparently did not realize that many people feel 1 year is a very short time to go from "just started dating" to "engaged"--I get the impression that you may well not have realized that you have a pattern of jumping into relationships hard and fast and then they end (largely because they never got past the initial infatuation stage before you did something to make them very "permanent" like getting married or moving in together). And that you may well not realize how deeply this can hurt your son. You probably think of him and you as a unit and do not really think about him bonding with these other men, etc.

It is pretty normal to not see things in yourself as you move through life that an outsider could see and point out to you, and if you are receptive (as you say you were early in the thread) be able to recognize at that point and chance. If everyone could always sees these things themselves and change with no effort then every therapist would be put out of business

Anyway, I said what I said NOT to hurt you or to say that you should be "perfect" at 40, but to hopefully help you realize what is going on and to appeal to you as a mother in the hopes of helping your child.

I hope you can take that in the spirit it was intended and both you and your son (and your boyfriend) can end up in a much better place eventually.
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Hadley

My blog about my wanderings and ramblings in Europe, Disney and where ever else life takes me:

http://hadleyswanderingsandramblings.blogspot.de/
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