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Old 05-03-2013, 03:00 PM   #61
NHdisneylover
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Originally Posted by Granny square View Post
I am amazed that hair length was more important than character.

I can't imagine judging the boy and girlfriends of my kids son such a shallow level.
I agree. I guess it is good that the boy's mom was thrilled. I can't imagine being very happy that my son was dating someone who was so controlling about something like hair.
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Old 05-03-2013, 03:14 PM   #62
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Originally Posted by NHdisneylover

I agree. I guess it is good that the boy's mom was thrilled. I can't imagine being very happy that my son was dating someone who was so controlling about something like hair.
I agree- something that controlling would send red flags up right away in a relationship.
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Old 05-03-2013, 03:30 PM   #63
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I agree- something that controlling would send red flags up right away in a relationship.
If these are adults I'd agree, but teens? Nah. Many teens are very attuned to the perils of upsetting other kids' parents, and much of the time in dating relationships at that age, failing to go a little way to please parents means losing the girl.

For a teen boy who really likes a girl to cut his hair as a way to help her avoid drama with her mom isn't really that wild a stretch -- if the hair didn't mean all that much to him it wouldn't have been that big a deal.
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Old 05-03-2013, 03:38 PM   #64
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If these are adults I'd agree, but teens? Nah. Many teens are very attuned to the perils of upsetting other kids' parents, and much of the time in dating relationships at that age, failing to go a little way to please parents means losing the girl.

For a teen boy who really likes a girl to cut his hair as a way to help her avoid drama with her mom isn't really that wild a stretch -- if the hair didn't mean all that much to him it wouldn't have been that big a deal.
For a teen girl to manipulate a teen boy to avoid her family drama....big red flags.

The need for that kind of control is creepy. The shallow parental behavior just pathetic. How superficial can you be?
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Old 05-03-2013, 04:32 PM   #65
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Hair is just a little speed bump in the road.
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Old 05-03-2013, 04:34 PM   #66
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Not only is hair a hill I wouldn't die on, but it was one I was willing to stand up for DS on. My little sister got married last summer, and my dad insisted that DS14 (at the time) get a hair cut. I told my dad that wasn't his call--if he found the shoulder length hair so offensive, he could leave DS out of wedding photos. There was a little conflict over that, but it ended up blowing over. Then about a month after the wedding, DS decided on his own to get a hair cut . . . go figure.
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Old 05-03-2013, 04:38 PM   #67
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Then about a month after the wedding, DS decided on his own to get a hair cut . . . go figure.
LOL, that's classic. He was probably planning to do it sooner until someone tried to tell him to.
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Old 05-03-2013, 05:52 PM   #68
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Originally Posted by Granny square

For a teen girl to manipulate a teen boy to avoid her family drama....big red flags.

The need for that kind of control is creepy. The shallow parental behavior just pathetic. How superficial can you be?
Oh, come on now. There's nothing creepy about a girl telling her boyfriend to cut his hair.
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Old 05-03-2013, 06:02 PM   #69
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Oh, come on now. There's nothing creepy about a girl telling her boyfriend to cut his hair.
No, but I wouldn't want my daughter doing it anymore than I'd want my son telling his girlfriend to cut her hair.

But I don't think that's the issue. I think it's that the poster seemed to put such a high importance on hair.
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Old 05-03-2013, 06:47 PM   #70
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No, but I wouldn't want my daughter doing it anymore than I'd want my son telling his girlfriend to cut her hair.

But I don't think that's the issue. I think it's that the poster seemed to put such a high importance on hair.
Thank yes.

But I do not want my children telling their friends/boy/girlfriends to cut their hair, hide their tattoo, or take out their earring for me. And I would tell my kids to run like hell from someone who did that to them.

And any girl who is afraid to come home with a boy with long hair has terribly controlling parents. Also a huge red flag. Only creepy when you've been watching controlling crazy mom on bates motel. Probably overly dramatic term. My bad
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Old 05-03-2013, 07:02 PM   #71
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Originally Posted by tasha99 View Post
Not only is hair a hill I wouldn't die on, but it was one I was willing to stand up for DS on. My little sister got married last summer, and my dad insisted that DS14 (at the time) get a hair cut. I told my dad that wasn't his call--if he found the shoulder length hair so offensive, he could leave DS out of wedding photos. There was a little conflict over that, but it ended up blowing over. Then about a month after the wedding, DS decided on his own to get a hair cut . . . go figure.
I'd probably advise my DS to dump any girl who told him to cut his hair before meeting her mother. If the family is THAT worried about something so superficial I'd want him far away from her.
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Old 05-03-2013, 09:56 PM   #72
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Thank yes.

But I do not want my children telling their friends/boy/girlfriends to cut their hair, hide their tattoo, or take out their earring for me. And I would tell my kids to run like hell from someone who did that to them.

And any girl who is afraid to come home with a boy with long hair has terribly controlling parents. Also a huge red flag. Only creepy when you've been watching controlling crazy mom on bates motel. Probably overly dramatic term. My bad
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Old 05-03-2013, 11:24 PM   #73
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I'd probably advise my DS to dump any girl who told him to cut his hair before meeting her mother. If the family is THAT worried about something so superficial I'd want him far away from her.
Telling a kid to dump his "love" is likely to have a similar result as telling a kid to get a haircut.
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Old 05-03-2013, 11:38 PM   #74
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Telling a kid to dump his "love" is likely to have a similar result as telling a kid to get a haircut.
Wouldn't tell my kid to get a haircut.

And yes, my advice would be that it wasn't a healthy relationship. I want my kids w/people who "love" them as is.
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Old 05-03-2013, 11:55 PM   #75
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It's character, not hair, clothes, music, tatoos (although none of my kids have them) that matters in our house.
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