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Old 05-02-2013, 03:20 PM   #31
Katy Belle
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Some girl probably told him she liked it.

Not my hill. I have one son that has always had short hair. Two others that have had long hair many times. Right now DS13 can barely see. Its hair.

I assume he knows how you feel about it. Short of tying him and down and shaving it, I'm not sure you will be able to convince him.

I would emphasize cleanliness and leave it alone.
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Old 05-02-2013, 03:23 PM   #32
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been there, done that, 3 down and 1 to go. Luckily the last boy is only 7 so I have some time to recuperate from the last one. All my boys have gone through the long hair stage in high school. Two of them have straight hair, so they just looked like shaggy dogs. The middle one has very curly hair. He would wet it down, comb it straight, and jam a ball cap on his head to keep the hair down over his face. He looked totally ridiculous. What cured him was his grandmother's funeral. I refused to let him walk into the funeral parlor with a hat on, so all this hair was straight down over his face. My brother-in-law hadn't seen this latest style before. We walked in, he did a double take, and yelled "Hey ya'll, Cousin It done come to the funeral!". My son was 17 and totally embarrassed, everybody else thought it was hysterical, and he had a new hair style a few days later.
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Old 05-02-2013, 03:36 PM   #33
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Most days my sons looks like the Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland. It's unique though and it defines him, no one else has his hair. The girls at school love it (so he says) maybe that's why your son wears his long, maybe the girls like it?
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Old 05-02-2013, 03:39 PM   #34
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It's not a hill you should die on in a bunch of a different ways. One, when you put your foot down on something with a teen, you want it to be something that really matters. Hairstyle is not in that category. Two, hair is totally superficial. You need to convey to him that your concern is what kind of person he is inside, not outside.

My college freshman will come home for the summer next week. He hasn't had his hair cut since he started college, and I'm pretty sure he hasn't shaved this semester. His hair is very, very curly and thick. But what a great first year of college he has had! His grades are good, his friends and activities are plentiful and he's just fun to be around!

His older brother has really, really good blond hair. It's been very long for five-six years. He actually is a bit tired of it, but feels like he can't cut it because it's so much a part of his artist/musician persona. He wears it tied back about 90% of the time, though. He'll probably cut it before his wedding next year. I don't really care -- it's his hair. He's by far my most conventional kid -- I know he's the one who would take care of me if I were old or sick.

My other son gets his hair cut regularly and shaves every work day, which works for him.
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Old 05-02-2013, 04:01 PM   #35
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It's not a hill you should die on in a bunch of a different ways. One, when you put your foot down on something with a teen, you want it to be something that really matters. Hairstyle is not in that category. Two, hair is totally superficial. You need to convey to him that your concern is what kind of person he is inside, not outside.

My college freshman will come home for the summer next week. He hasn't had his hair cut since he started college, and I'm pretty sure he hasn't shaved this semester. His hair is very, very curly and thick. But what a great first year of college he has had! His grades are good, his friends and activities are plentiful and he's just fun to be around!

His older brother has really, really good blond hair. It's been very long for five-six years. He actually is a bit tired of it, but feels like he can't cut it because it's so much a part of his artist/musician persona. He wears it tied back about 90% of the time, though. He'll probably cut it before his wedding next year. I don't really care -- it's his hair. He's by far my most conventional kid -- I know he's the one who would take care of me if I were old or sick.

My other son gets his hair cut regularly and shaves every work day, which works for him.
Oh lord!!! Before he just cuts his hair, please tell him to check with the bride first. If she has only known him with longer hair, cutting it just before the big day could be a melting point for a stressed bride. A friend of DH did that 20+ years ago, without talking to the bride beforehand. The tears that were shed over the fact that he didn't look like himself any more. We still - all the group of friends - get a chuckle over it, him not so much.

For me, I didn't get much say. DH graduated AIT 7 days before our wedding. He was shaved high and tight. When I had last seen him, it was a full head of hair. I knew it was coming though and delt with it without tears being shed.
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Old 05-02-2013, 04:19 PM   #36
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Oh lord!!! Before he just cuts his hair, please tell him to check with the bride first. If she has only known him with longer hair, cutting it just before the big day could be a melting point for a stressed bride. A friend of DH did that 20+ years ago, without talking to the bride beforehand. The tears that were shed over the fact that he didn't look like himself any more. We still - all the group of friends - get a chuckle over it, him not so much.

For me, I didn't get much say. DH graduated AIT 7 days before our wedding. He was shaved high and tight. When I had last seen him, it was a full head of hair. I knew it was coming though and delt with it without tears being shed.
I'm sure the bride will have a big say in the decision! She has been his girlfriend since eighth grade when he had short spiked hair and braces and wore preppy clothes. They will be 26 when they get married. I will say that he shaved and was very neatly groomed when he proposed ... in front of the Taj Mahal, no less!
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Old 05-02-2013, 04:28 PM   #37
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Remember, even the Biebs cut his hair. Justin Bieber no longer has the Bieber haircut. Hairstyles go in cycles. Soon enough something new will cycle in for guys.
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Old 05-02-2013, 04:37 PM   #38
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No. Hair is NEVER the hill to die on. It's a phase he's going through, and for most teens hair is a big part of their identity. Just let it run its course.
I agree with this. It's just hair. Let it go.

For full disclosure: my 16yo DDs current hairstyle is a pixie cut, dyed bright purple. Last month it was bleached white, the month before that it was turquoise. She had it bleach blonde last month only because it was time for the dance recital, and I reminded her that I didn't think the studio director would appreciate turquoise hair for the show, so I insisted it had to be some 'semi natural' color. LOL. She did bleach it, and as soon as the recital was over, we colored it again.

I figure that if she doesn't have embarassing hair in her yearbook and school pictures, what fun will my grandchildren have taunting her?

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Old 05-02-2013, 04:37 PM   #39
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Let him get his "emo" cut. In fact take him to a stylist who is good at it. The bright side is that it will be cut!

Hair is not something I care about, as long as it is CLEAN.

My 16yodd has a short hairstyle as much as she can get away with in HS. She said once she hits college she is getting it very very short.
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Old 05-02-2013, 04:57 PM   #40
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Of all the things to be worried about, hair shouldn't be "your hill". It changes and grows and can be cut, colored, styled, etc. My 9 year old son has long, thick wavy hair. For a while it drove my DH crazy, but it is an expression of him. As long as it is kept clean, don't bother about it. There are so many things that will have a lasting effect to worry about, hair is temporary.

As a teen, I had a multi-colored hair, partially shaved head, sticking straight up hair, etc. My mother told her friends "it won't make a difference in 10 years, so I won't bother about it" That has been my philosophy, as well. And I was glad to be allowed to express myself.
I agree- hair is that last thing I concern myself with. When my daughter was 9 she wanted her hair blue- so I took her and had the bottom 6 inches of her hair dyed blue- she tired of it after a few months and got the bottom 6 inches cut off. At 11 she had a big chunk in the back and underside neon red. She is 13 now and this summer it is going to be Orange, red and pink--- sounds weird but its an interesting look LOL. She will tire of it and go back to her normal color eventually.
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Old 05-02-2013, 05:30 PM   #41
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My nephew at 13 had hair that looked like Dr. Brown from Back to the Future, and it was funny because we were at Universal and Dr. Brown kept calling him Simba, it was long blond and afro'd. Now it is still long and he keeps it in a pony tail most of the time, curled down the middle of his back. On him it looks really good.
I had girls, however if I had boys hair is a battle i would not have, it is theirs and if they want it long, so be it. Of course my husband has long hair and his parents even now (almost 50) still tries to get him to cut it. UGH...
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Old 05-02-2013, 05:53 PM   #42
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Hair is one of the easiest, and least permanent, ways for one to express their personality. This is the last thing to worry too much about! Especially at 13 when they don't have to worry about getting a job or anything like that. Let them have their fun now!
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Old 05-02-2013, 05:58 PM   #43
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Another thought. .. after watching a 17 year old battle leukemia and lose all his hair a couple if times this year, I wouldn't blame him if he never cut his hair again.

I remind myself of this when I can't see dss eyes and suddenly hair is not important.
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Old 05-02-2013, 06:19 PM   #44
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I think is not a battle to fight. It grows and it gets cuts. Color or style doesn't bother me as long as it's clean. My 9 year old has long shaggy hair and he lets us get it cut on occasion but it doesn't kill me. My family hates it though, they tease him about being a girl and I tell him not to listen.
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Old 05-02-2013, 06:34 PM   #45
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Not a hill as long as it is clean. All my sons went down that road. Welcome to 13.
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