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Old 04-20-2013, 05:57 PM   #76
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Tinkbyday and Donnaduck333...

I agree with both of you. Things can happen anywhere.

Today I was in CVS with my 3 girls and two of my girls, who are teenagers, were in the make-up isle and I was on the end of the isle where you couldn't see me but I could hear what was going on. There was an older man who asked my younger daughter to come with him to pick out some lipstick. My kids ignored him and I immediately went into the isle and he then said never mind. My daughter's were freaked out and stuck by me the rest of the time.

I'm not sure what his intent was, but I'm sure it wasn't to pick out lipstick.
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:10 PM   #77
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Originally Posted by abk96 View Post
Tinkbyday and Donnaduck333...

I agree with both of you. Things can happen anywhere.

Today I was in CVS with my 3 girls and two of my girls, who are teenagers, were in the make-up isle and I was on the end of the isle where you couldn't see me but I could hear what was going on. There was an older man who asked my younger daughter to come with him to pick out some lipstick. My kids ignored him and I immediately went into the isle and he then said never mind. My daughter's were freaked out and stuck by me the rest of the time.

I'm not sure what his intent was, but I'm sure it wasn't to pick out lipstick.
Scary.....

You have to be so careful. Once I was staying alone in a hotel and very early one morning there was a knock on my door, I asked who it was and someone said "maintenance." I said come back when I'm awake. I complained to the front desk who said they never sent any maintenance up to my room....
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:19 PM   #78
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Originally Posted by chasgoose View Post
I guess I just wouldn't consider going from the room to the CL as "wandering around the resort." For most CL rooms, both the floor and the lounge are limited access, and there is a CM present right outside the lounge and/or inside the lounge. For example, if you are staying at YC/BC do you stay with your 10 year old at all times? Like with the slide there, unless you actually accompany your child to it, it's pretty hard to keep them within view at all times (especially since the slide deposits riders relatively far away from the start). I would be much more worried about something bad befalling my kid in that pool than I would letting them walk down the hall to get a snack at the CL. The CL seems about as safe a place as any, and you can't supervise your children 24/7. If they are mature enough to behave themselves in a CL, then they should be able to handle a trip there themselves.
I think I was pretty clear in my post that I don't think it is appropriate for a child to walk around a resort alone, so yes, I would plan to be with my child at all times at a hotel anywhere ESPECIALLY a 10 year old. If you have stayed CL at the YC then you know that the floor is quite large and my position would be the same at any hotel regardless of size.

I have stayed at YC several times and yes, I got my bum off the chair and walked over to a place where I could see her get on the slide - not really a big deal or inconvenience.
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:25 PM   #79
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i think anyone that wouldn't allow their 9 and 12 year old to travel two floors up are acting as helicopter parents. At 12 you are entering high school in Canada and that means being exposed to drugs, smoking alcohol and worse. You should teach your kids to be independent and safe. The more you protect them at this age the more you are handicapping them and setting them up for failure.
I will choose not to name call even though I completely disagree with your parenting style. For the record, I am far from a "helicopter parent". I think teaching values and morals takes care of the temptations of drugs and alcohol, of course, it is entirely possible that some parents may think experimenting with those things brings life lessons and drives independence as well.

My child is very independent and because I take common sense precautions, she is also safe
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:33 PM   #80
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Originally Posted by abk96 View Post
Tinkbyday and Donnaduck333...

I agree with both of you. Things can happen anywhere.

Today I was in CVS with my 3 girls and two of my girls, who are teenagers, were in the make-up isle and I was on the end of the isle where you couldn't see me but I could hear what was going on. There was an older man who asked my younger daughter to come with him to pick out some lipstick. My kids ignored him and I immediately went into the isle and he then said never mind. My daughter's were freaked out and stuck by me the rest of the time.

I'm not sure what his intent was, but I'm sure it wasn't to pick out lipstick.
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Originally Posted by sz9144 View Post
Scary.....

You have to be so careful. Once I was staying alone in a hotel and very early one morning there was a knock on my door, I asked who it was and someone said "maintenance." I said come back when I'm awake. I complained to the front desk who said they never sent any maintenance up to my room....
Thank you both for the examples of the things that can happen - exactly the point I am trying to make. I think it is easy for people to have a false sense of security and especially at a place like Disney, but it is the wrong place to become laid back.

I'm obviously not going to change the minds of those that believe their position is the right one nor will they change ours - I do feel strongly about this topic for a variety of reason though.
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:36 PM   #81
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i think anyone that wouldn't allow their 9 and 12 year old to travel two floors up are acting as helicopter parents. At 12 you are entering high school in Canada and that means being exposed to drugs, smoking alcohol and worse. You should teach your kids to be independent and safe. The more you protect them at this age the more you are handicapping them and setting them up for failure.
I find it amazing that people are watching 10 and 12 year olds as if they were 5 or 6. By the time I was 12, I was able to navigate the NYC subway and bus system on my own. At 10 I was allowed to go to the grocery store around the corner to buy candy or snacks. Everybody did this, it was common and normal. The crime rate was MUCH higher back then than it is now, and yet people allowed their children to play outside without constant supervision.

I can see watching your young child (up to age 9 or so) like a hawk, but two children together at 10 and 12 don't need that sort of surveillance. I'd be more wary of a single child, but definitely by 12 I'd let them go to the lounge for a drink or snack by themselves.
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:36 PM   #82
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Quote:
Originally Posted by abk96 View Post
Tinkbyday and Donnaduck333...

I agree with both of you. Things can happen anywhere.

Today I was in CVS with my 3 girls and two of my girls, who are teenagers, were in the make-up isle and I was on the end of the isle where you couldn't see me but I could hear what was going on. There was an older man who asked my younger daughter to come with him to pick out some lipstick. My kids ignored him and I immediately went into the isle and he then said never mind. My daughter's were freaked out and stuck by me the rest of the time.

I'm not sure what his intent was, but I'm sure it wasn't to pick out lipstick.
Glad you were close by. That kind of behavior is inappropriate, a normal man wouldn't approach young females. If he needs *genuine* help, he should ask the beauty counter employee.
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:42 PM   #83
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The funny thing I thought when I read this thread is, what if the parents who are suggesting you let your kids wander aimlessly about the resort are actually not really parents at all- this is the Internet after all.

That being said, you have to extend the leash one link at a time, eventually your kids are 100% on their own, it takes many years to learn how to deal with that freedom, so if you wait till they are 15, that leaves you a lot of leash in a short time.

This world is full of crazies though, which is why my kids are working towards their black belts in Karate, you never know! If you are uneasy about if that tells you something.
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Old 04-20-2013, 06:48 PM   #84
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I always like to lurk on these types of questions just to see the range of answers. Of course it's every parent's discretion. We only have one DD8 and I can't imagine letting her out of my sight in a hotel or at the parks but she doesn't have an older sibling to watch out for her Maybe I'll feel differently when she's a few years older, but I doubt it
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Old 04-20-2013, 07:43 PM   #85
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Originally Posted by buzlite View Post
i think anyone that wouldn't allow their 9 and 12 year old to travel two floors up are acting as helicopter parents. At 12 you are entering high school in Canada and that means being exposed to drugs, smoking alcohol and worse. You should teach your kids to be independent and safe. The more you protect them at this age the more you are handicapping them and setting them up for failure.
Funny, if I could I would insert my child yearbook from high school autographs and personal messages on there from his friends, they are kids who have experiemented with drugs and such alcohol and respected my son who chose not to partake in those recreational bad or even worse things and was an A student and a gym rat at 6'2 and 210. He is an Adonis quite frankly and one of the so called popular kids at highschool ( by the way, I was the house they all hung with the smell homemade goodies and always an extra place for diner available for them).Yep, I rather have them here than at the house of the mom who said, "I'm leaving it up to chance, but,"honey make sure ya lock the car there". I take full credit by my hard work as "schooling my kids and having strict rules as I did not put up with such behavior and there was always harsh consequences. And yes even at the younger ages they knew right from wrong, and "No" was my FAvORITE word used as a Mom. Helicoptor Mom huh,Lol!!! Well my kids are 19 and 25, my daughter a teacher and an amazing one too, and she has the most well behaved classroom in that entire school with awards to show for it. Each child had a 3.84/4.0 and both live on there own and was taught and shown by me how to do it with great successful. By the way, I never felt like having "life' teach my kids lessons was the best, I prefer my voice and experience to guide them, as the world is pretty lax about things that can do harm. My mother and father did the same for me and my sisters and brothers, we all own our businesses. Personally I feel I had these children, they are my responsibilty not the worlds. Helicoptor Moms huh, that's humorous and I say it has a better success rate than T-H-U-T-A mother. And I won't be decipher that acronym for you all, there may be pre school toys present on here and that would be wrong
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Old 04-20-2013, 07:56 PM   #86
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Originally Posted by DonnaDuck333 View Post
Funny, if I could I would insert my child yearbook from high school autographs and personal messages on there from his friends, they are kids who have experiemented with drugs and such alcohol and respected my son who chose not to partake in those recreational bad or even worse things and was an A student and a gym rat at 6'2 and 210. He is an Adonis quite frankly and one of the so called popular kids at highschool ( by the way, I was the house they all hung with the smell homemade goodies and always an extra place for diner available for them).Yep, I rather have them here than at the house of the mom who said, "I'm leaving it up to chance, but,"honey make sure ya lock the car there". I take full credit by my hard work as "schooling my kids and having strict rules as I did not put up with such behavior and there was always harsh consequences. And yes even at the younger ages they knew right from wrong, and "No" was my FAvORITE word used as a Mom. Helicoptor Mom huh,Lol!!! Well my kids are 19 and 25, my daughter a teacher and an amazing one too, and she has the most well behaved classroom in that entire school with awards to show for it. Each child had a 3.84/4.0 and both live on there own and was taught and shown by me how to do it with great successful. By the way, I never felt like having "life' teach my kids lessons was the best, I prefer my voice and experience to guide them, as the world is pretty lax about things that can do harm. My mother and father did the same for me and my sisters and brothers, we all own our businesses. Personally I feel I had these children, they are my responsibilty not the worlds. Helicoptor Moms huh, that's humorous and I say it has a better success rate than T-H-U-T-A mother. And I won't be decipher that acronym for you all, there may be pre school toys present on here and that would be wrong
I'm sorry, I don't understand your post at all. Are you saying that by 10 & 12 your kids had learned from your example and they knew how to behave? Or at 10 & 12 you were continuing to watch them constantly?
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Old 04-20-2013, 08:25 PM   #87
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Originally Posted by DonnaDuck333 View Post
Funny, if I could I would insert my child yearbook from high school autographs and personal messages on there from his friends, they are kids who have experiemented with drugs and such alcohol and respected my son who chose not to partake in those recreational bad or even worse things and was an A student and a gym rat at 6'2 and 210. He is an Adonis quite frankly and one of the so called popular kids at highschool ( by the way, I was the house they all hung with the smell homemade goodies and always an extra place for diner available for them).Yep, I rather have them here than at the house of the mom who said, "I'm leaving it up to chance, but,"honey make sure ya lock the car there". I take full credit by my hard work as "schooling my kids and having strict rules as I did not put up with such behavior and there was always harsh consequences. And yes even at the younger ages they knew right from wrong, and "No" was my FAvORITE word used as a Mom. Helicoptor Mom huh,Lol!!! Well my kids are 19 and 25, my daughter a teacher and an amazing one too, and she has the most well behaved classroom in that entire school with awards to show for it. Each child had a 3.84/4.0 and both live on there own and was taught and shown by me how to do it with great successful. By the way, I never felt like having "life' teach my kids lessons was the best, I prefer my voice and experience to guide them, as the world is pretty lax about things that can do harm. My mother and father did the same for me and my sisters and brothers, we all own our businesses. Personally I feel I had these children, they are my responsibilty not the worlds. Helicoptor Moms huh, that's humorous and I say it has a better success rate than T-H-U-T-A mother. And I won't be decipher that acronym for you all, there may be pre school toys present on here and that would be wrong
I think you completely misunderstood my point... I was saying that you have to realize kids are eventually going to face tough situations and the best way to deal with it is to give kids to tools to deal with tough situations rather trying to prevent those situations from ever occurring. Teaching them how to go to the lounge and using punishment and positive feedback on them following your lessons. I know so many children that were home schooled because the local school was too "dangerous". These are the same kids that when the leave to college are smoking up because now all of a sudden they have all the freedom in the world from their strict parents. I deal with kids like this everyday in my clinic. Parents that pretend sex doesn't exist having their daughters showing up pregnant getting an abortion all without their parents ever realizing it. Teach them how to deal with problems rather then hiding them from the world.
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Old 04-20-2013, 08:36 PM   #88
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Funny, if I could I would insert my child yearbook from high school autographs and personal messages on there from his friends, they are kids who have experiemented with drugs and such alcohol and respected my son who chose not to partake in those recreational bad or even worse things and was an A student and a gym rat at 6'2 and 210. He is an Adonis quite frankly and one of the so called popular kids at highschool ( by the way, I was the house they all hung with the smell homemade goodies and always an extra place for diner available for them).Yep, I rather have them here than at the house of the mom who said, "I'm leaving it up to chance, but,"honey make sure ya lock the car there". I take full credit by my hard work as "schooling my kids and having strict rules as I did not put up with such behavior and there was always harsh consequences. And yes even at the younger ages they knew right from wrong, and "No" was my FAvORITE word used as a Mom. Helicoptor Mom huh,Lol!!! Well my kids are 19 and 25, my daughter a teacher and an amazing one too, and she has the most well behaved classroom in that entire school with awards to show for it. Each child had a 3.84/4.0 and both live on there own and was taught and shown by me how to do it with great successful. By the way, I never felt like having "life' teach my kids lessons was the best, I prefer my voice and experience to guide them, as the world is pretty lax about things that can do harm. My mother and father did the same for me and my sisters and brothers, we all own our businesses. Personally I feel I had these children, they are my responsibilty not the worlds. Helicoptor Moms huh, that's humorous and I say it has a better success rate than T-H-U-T-A mother. And I won't be decipher that acronym for you all, there may be pre school toys present on here and that would be wrong
I agree and understand the point you're making. I was brought up this way. I don't leave it up to luck either with my kids. Thank you for sharing that about your kids. They sound like responsible adults. Bravo!!!
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Old 04-20-2013, 09:15 PM   #89
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I think you completely misunderstood my point... I was saying that you have to realize kids are eventually going to face tough situations and the best way to deal with it is to give kids to tools to deal with tough situations rather trying to prevent those situations from ever occurring. Teaching them how to go to the lounge and using punishment and positive feedback on them following your lessons. I know so many children that were home schooled because the local school was too "dangerous". These are the same kids that when the leave to college are smoking up because now all of a sudden they have all the freedom in the world from their strict parents. I deal with kids like this everyday in my clinic. Parents that pretend sex doesn't exist having their daughters showing up pregnant getting an abortion all without their parents ever realizing it. Teach them how to deal with problems rather then hiding them from the world.
My kids were out in the world front and center, not at 10 and 12 mind you as again in all due respect you have to agree some life lessons are quite horrible and can impact that child in a way that will take years of therapy. So, I discussed sex frequently and the what haves, and also that drugs are something that make you feel probably amazing and thats why people do them and get addicted because like disney they can escape for a bit. I taught them life is hard and gave them "coping skills" and those kind of tools made them self thinkers. They also went to public schools and did sports and I was at everygame and practice because they loved mom cheering them on. I supported there endeavors and help them to reach there goals by telling them it's all about "hard work" that they have to do that all on thier own. I'm just wondering in your line of work that perhaps you came across a 10 or 12 year old that was harmed in a way that was so tramatic that it impacted thier whole life. Scarey stuff happens in the world, we hear about it everyday with kids. If I put time and countless hours into my business for it to flourish, I personally think that my children deserve that and more from there mother. So you can parent a child well with old fashion hardwork and a strong constitution. Sorry, the proof for me is they're fantastic human beings and a pleasure to be around. One child is done with college and engaged to another fellow teacher, and my son is lookind forward to becoming a business and econmic major. Sounds like pretty well adjusted adults to me. Glad I took this parenting thing seriously, seemed to have paid off for them. You have a zippty do da evening and by the way God being present in our house played a huge role in thier upbringing and sense of right and wrong... just wanted to give a shout out to the big guy
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Old 04-20-2013, 09:26 PM   #90
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If you are asking you must think they are mature enough to go without you. I would have to see how I felt once I got there. How close is your room to the elevator? The distance would matter to me. I'm a huge worrier but I would probably let them go together with a phone.
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