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Old 04-30-2013, 02:20 PM   #2191
cabanafrau
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Originally Posted by momontheright View Post
I hope the family of this little girl does her a favor and does the selfless action of letting her live with a great family somewhere else so she does not have to always be known as the Boston Bomber's daughter. It would suck immensely to let go of your child/grandchild but in this case she would be better off knowing of none of this as she grows up or having to be associated with this family. I don't feel sorry for the mom at all she married this guy knowing he was abusive and controlling why did she go back to to dating him after she broke up with him for knocking this snot out of her much less marry him? It wasn't like she was some poor women with no other options by all accounts she came from a warm loving home with a family and many friends who cared for and would support her.
That's completely premature and looking to inflict tremendous trauma on that child. If the mother is not involved she will have no criminal charges & therefore no barrier to changing their names & being able to disassociate them from this horror.
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Old 04-30-2013, 02:28 PM   #2192
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That's completely premature and looking to inflict tremendous trauma on that child. If the mother is not involved she will have no criminal charges & therefore no barrier to changing their names & being able to disassociate them from this horror.
Well what stinks is the mother, her parents , and even her sister have had their pictures plastered all over the news and unfortunately there will be someone everywhere they go that will remember them. If she is in fact not guilty which I am 50/50 on then she should make plans to leave America if she is to ever give her a kid a normal life which is sad to say but unfortunately this what we have become as a nation.
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Old 04-30-2013, 02:37 PM   #2193
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Originally Posted by momontheright View Post
Well what stinks is the mother, her parents , and even her sister have had their pictures plastered all over the news and unfortunately there will be someone everywhere they go that will remember them. If she is in fact not guilty which I am 50/50 on then she should make plans to leave America if she is to ever give her a kid a normal life which is sad to say but unfortunately this what we have become as a nation.
I've seen nothing showing her parents or sister. I've seen an old pic of the mom, possibly HS grad pic & then her in a burqa or hijab, which gives me zero clue of what she looks like. I think early on there was something of the mother supposedly putting her child in a van, but nothing identifying about the child either. I do think it would be possible to walk away with a new name & not be known.
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Old 04-30-2013, 02:38 PM   #2194
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I can think of several people I know personally who walked in on their spouse cheating on them in their own house. (And, yes, one was on the dining room table!) Heck, when I was in high school, one of my friends found out that his dad had a whole other family in a different state including two other school-age children. The family thought he had to travel to the "home office" for his job for weeks at a time. The other family didn't know about my friend's family either. It was quite the nightmare -- and everybody (previously) thought the dad was a really nice guy. Now we know he was just a really good liar.

I am not saying she's innocent, but in what's been published, I haven't seen anything that convinces me she's guilty as an accomplice -- or intentionally concealing evidence -- either, so lets wait and see what the investigation turns up before we crucify her. If she's guilty, I'll join everyone in calling for her head!

I'll go out and say it. If my husband wanted to he could probably:
1) open a credit card without my knowledge (at least for a while).
2) could buy inexpensive items like pressure cookers and BBs without me knowing about it.
3) could hide those items in our house without me finding them (at least for a while. I'm sure he knows which cupboards, closets and basement areas I frequently visit, and which areas I don't frequently visit.)

Of course, if he was openly building a bomb in the dining room, I'd be suspicious, but if he cleaned everything up before I got home and acted "normal", why would I be suspicious?
I agree there are a lot of things we can hide from our spouse, but how do you hide your personality? According to others he was vocal in his distaste of American culture, they skyped daily while he was in Dagestan, and he posted virulent/violent videos on YouTube, after his return. IMO, when a person has radical opinions, I would look at what might be innocuous if associated with someone else, with a bit more scrutiny. Cheaters lie, but I don't believe Tamerlan cared who knew how he felt: he was who he was.

This was not a woman w/o a way out: she had parents who seem to have welcomed her home, despite the horrible man she married.
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Old 04-30-2013, 02:41 PM   #2195
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Originally Posted by momontheright View Post
Well what stinks is the mother, her parents , and even her sister have had their pictures plastered all over the news and unfortunately there will be someone everywhere they go that will remember them. If she is in fact not guilty which I am 50/50 on then she should make plans to leave America if she is to ever give her a kid a normal life which is sad to say but unfortunately this what we have become as a nation.
Americans have a really short memory for the most part and I personally don't think Americans throw rocks at someone due to sins of the father.
There are children of murders/rapists/prisoners everyday around and I'm pretty sure they go on to live happy normal lives.
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Old 04-30-2013, 02:42 PM   #2196
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That's what I said!
I know. I was just agreeing with you.
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Old 04-30-2013, 02:43 PM   #2197
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I've seen nothing showing her parents or sister. I've seen an old pic of the mom, possibly HS grad pic & then her in a burqa or hijab, which gives me zero clue of what she looks like. I think early on there was something of the mother supposedly putting her child in a van, but nothing identifying about the child either. I do think it would be possible to walk away with a new name & not be known.
It's definitely possible for them to start fresh, if they are truly innocent. The parents had already listed their house on the market just before the attacks. They could easily move to a new part of the country and provide a normal life for that little girl.
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Old 04-30-2013, 02:52 PM   #2198
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Originally Posted by cabanafrau View Post
I've seen nothing showing her parents or sister. I've seen an old pic of the mom, possibly HS grad pic & then her in a burqa or hijab, which gives me zero clue of what she looks like. I think early on there was something of the mother supposedly putting her child in a van, but nothing identifying about the child either. I do think it would be possible to walk away with a new name & not be known.
Really you have seen nothing? There have been pics of both her parents and sister in the yard at their house even of the poor child with her face blocked out.
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Americans have a really short memory for the most part and I personally don't think Americans throw rocks at someone due to sins of the father.
There are children of murders/rapists/prisoners everyday around and I'm pretty sure they go on to live happy normal lives.

I don't know I just think if that little girl is ever going to have a normal life she needs to be free of this tragedy. Most so called "everyday crimes" aren't as publicized so I am sure children and spouses are able to make a clean break but this is such highly publicized crime there will always be that one person who remembers.
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Old 04-30-2013, 03:01 PM   #2199
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If her Mom is not guilty of anything, there is no good reason for her to live with anyone else. I say this as a mother of 3 children, 2 of them adopted. I believe in adoption, but I also know that there is heartbreak associated with it. This child already lost her Dad - if her Mom is innocent, there's no reason for her to lose her mom too.
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Old 04-30-2013, 03:01 PM   #2200
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Really you have seen nothing? There have been pics of both her parents and sister in the yard at their house even of the poor child with her face blocked out.



I don't know I just think if that little girl is ever going to have a normal life she needs to be free of this tragedy. Most so called "everyday crimes" aren't as publicized so I am sure children and spouses are able to make a clean break but this is such highly publicized crime there will always be that one person who remembers.
People everywhere live with the "sins of the family" and you live somewhere small or a close community it is highly publicized. The family of George Zimmerman in Florida are still living their life. I would imagine anyone related to Oswald still lived with their life after he killed Kennedy. It's about teaching your family toleration and love of others to make a difference. If we all keep teaching this, there will be a difference in how we treat everyone.
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Old 04-30-2013, 03:07 PM   #2201
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If her Mom is not guilty of anything, there is no good reason for her to live with anyone else. I say this as a mother of 3 children, 2 of them adopted. I believe in adoption, but I also know that there is heartbreak associated with it. This child already lost her Dad - if her Mom is innocent, there's no reason for her to lose her mom too.
Well obviously he wasn't a real prize so I am pretty sure if she can shake the stigma with what he has done she is much better off with out him.



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People everywhere live with the "sins of the family" and you live somewhere small or a close community it is highly publicized. The family of George Zimmerman in Florida are still living their life. I would imagine anyone related to Oswald still lived with their life after he killed Kennedy. It's about teaching your family toleration and love of others to make a difference. If we all keep teaching this, there will be a difference in how we treat everyone.
Maybe in a perfect world.
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Old 04-30-2013, 03:07 PM   #2202
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Originally Posted by momontheright View Post
Really you have seen nothing? There have been pics of both her parents and sister in the yard at their house even of the poor child with her face blocked out.



I don't know I just think if that little girl is ever going to have a normal life she needs to be free of this tragedy. Most so called "everyday crimes" aren't as publicized so I am sure children and spouses are able to make a clean break but this is such highly publicized crime there will always be that one person who remembers.
No, I've seen nothing of the family. I've seen pics of their house & heard dad is a doc.

ETA: Guess I should make it clear I don't have any interest in seeing the family.

Last edited by cabanafrau; 04-30-2013 at 03:13 PM. Reason: I don't play agenda games
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Old 04-30-2013, 03:15 PM   #2203
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But, the children of other killers say, the father’s crimes will cast a long shadow over the girl’s life. Of course there will be questions about the man she knew and the road that led him to carry out extreme violence against innocence. But other questions will also arise: How does his crime relate to me? Is there an inherited element to his actions? Could I do the same thing?

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“The community rejected me because they rejected my dad,” says Moore, who struggled throughout her childhood and early adulthood to come to terms with her father’s deeds. “Parents didn’t want their children around me,” she says, “maybe they thought I knew something, maybe because I was damaged by being raised by him. I felt ashamed and unworthy.”
http://www.thedailybeast.com/newswee...f-killers.html
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Old 04-30-2013, 03:17 PM   #2204
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No, I've seen nothing of the family. I've seen pics of their house & heard dad is a doc.

ETA: Guess I should make it clear I don't have any interest in seeing the family.
What agenda are you talking about? All I am saying is this kid deserves a normal life no matter what emotional implications it has on her mother. If it were me I would make sure my child was free and clear of any of this even if it meant not being able to raise her.
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Old 04-30-2013, 04:25 PM   #2205
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I seriously cannot wrap my mind around you thinking that the mother - if proven innocent of any wrong doing - should give up her child because of this!

Oh - and I can totally see how she may not have known he was making bombs! My husband loves to garden while I do NOT! He putzes in the shed all year round and grows plants in a room of our basement. I never venture into either of those places so besides plants, lights, soil and such - I haven't a clue what's in there!
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