Disney Information Station Logo

Go Back   The DIS Discussion Forums - DISboards.com > Just for Fun > Community Board
Find Hotel Specials & DIScounts
facebooktwitterpinterestgoogle plusyoutubeDIS Updates
Register Chat FAQ Tickers Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 03-12-2013, 01:48 PM   #16
The Next Mrs. Simon LeBon
On a serious note, I have to agree with the pantyhose and buttfloss
Rare. Bloody rare. Still mooing
apirateslifeforme's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Sinking deeper and deeper into Medazzaland
Posts: 8,277

I was divorced from my ex in February 2007 and I haven't heard from him since April of that year. Feels like he never existed and that's just the way I like it.
apirateslifeforme is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 01:50 PM   #17
DIS Veteran
RadioNate's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Chicago
Posts: 10,637

Originally Posted by pearlieq View Post
Nothing except to notify someone of passings/serious illness in the family if they were close during the relationship.
I have minor children so my ex and I email maybe 1-2x a week. We also still jointly own a property. We don't "talk" ever. Just email logistics. I see him the once a month or so he sees the kids but it is just a child exchange. We certainly don't "hang out" or anything.

I have two good friends that were divorced with no children. They don't every communicate unless something major happens. One talked a last year when the dog they jointly owned died and then summer when one of our friends was killed she reached out to him to offer condolences. But otherwise they don't ever speak.

The other haven't spoken to each other in years. I doubt they ever will.

ETA; I know my kids need their dad but I'd be happy to never speak to him again.
RadioNate is offline   Reply With Quote
Register to remove

Join Date: 1997
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 1,000,000
Old 03-12-2013, 02:13 PM   #18
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 195

Op here. I am asking because my boyfriend's ex-wife keeps contacting him over what I feel is trivial, nonsense stuff. It kicked into high gear when bf told her we were getting more serious (even though she has a bf herself and was the one who left the marriage). I really want bf to tell her to take a hike off a short pier, but they do have minor ties through pets.
dismom2005 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 02:59 PM   #19
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 230

Originally Posted by dismom2005 View Post
Op here. I am asking because my boyfriend's ex-wife keeps contacting him over what I feel is trivial, nonsense stuff. It kicked into high gear when bf told her we were getting more serious (even though she has a bf herself and was the one who left the marriage). I really want bf to tell her to take a hike off a short pier, but they do have minor ties through pets.
My view is allow it to work in whatever way works for him. He clearly doesn't want her or he wouldn't have divorced her. He chose you. Let him have his friends, whoever they are. If she starts getting affectionate or touchy, tell him it makes you uncomfortable, but a phone call? Even a lot of phone calls? If he's happy, let him be happy. You think the issues are trivial. Maybe they are. Maybe they aren't trivial to her, or to them. I wouldn't let it bother me, but it sounds like i'm in the minority here.
pickles521 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 03:04 PM   #20
DIS Veteran
superme80's Avatar
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NorCal
Posts: 3,577

DH hasn't spoken to his ex wife since the divorce. They never had any kids. I am pretty sure they hate each other.
DH-42 ME-34 DS #1-5 DS #2 3 DS #3 1 year old
superme80 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 03:39 PM   #21
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: North Idaho
Posts: 196

Originally Posted by dismom2005 View Post
Op here. I am asking because my boyfriend's ex-wife keeps contacting him over what I feel is trivial, nonsense stuff. It kicked into high gear when bf told her we were getting more serious (even though she has a bf herself and was the one who left the marriage). I really want bf to tell her to take a hike off a short pier, but they do have minor ties through pets.
I am not even close to being a relationship expert but this would bother me. I wouldn't want my bf's ex calling him, unless it was important. If it is important, a quick email should suffice. My ex-husband's old girlfriend was emailing him regularly after we had moved in together (she initiated the contact after we moved in, not before, so it's not like they were in contact before I was in the picture) and while I didn't exactly like it, I was ok with it until she started telling him how much she missed him, calling him terms of endearment (including "love," etc), and telling him how there would "only be one of [him]" in her life. I think he was a little flattered and amused, but to give him credit, he did tell her to not contact him anymore. However, a few years later she moved back to town (she was now remarried) and she contacted him again, and this time she wanted to meet him. I reminded him of what happened earlier and the slippery slope she was on, and he agreed to not see/contact her. Well, fast forward a few months and her husband actually came into my work and yelled at me to tell him to back off and cut off all contact with his wife. I was floored. I had no idea they had continued the contact. Her husband showed me copies of emails they had sent back and forth. He had created a secret email address just to contact her. So, yeah... that was pretty much the straw that broke the camel's back. We were having a ton of difficulties by that time, so it was the sign I needed that it was over. We were married by this time and had a child, so I had a lot of contact with him after the divorce, but it was literally about our son and any finances we had. If we had not had a shared child, I would have been perfectly happy not to see him again.
My mom and dad were amicably divorced, and still talk often. Granted, a lot of it is about me and my sister and their grandkids, but he also helps her with items like her taxes, etc.
My old roommate was amicably divorced and they did not have any kids - she would text him or he would text her here and there to say 'hi,' but I wouldn't say it was regular contact. When she had to get new brakes for her car, he did help her financially. There weren't any other significant others at this point in time, though. She's now remarried and I seriously doubt she has any contact with her ex.
Wow, didn't mean to write a novel. As you can see, this is a subject that is near and dear to my heart. Good luck, OP, it can be a difficult subject. I guess my only advice would be to follow your instincts. If you think there is something behind her constantly wanting to contact him, there probably is. If the matters are truly trivial, your boyfriend should respect your feelings enough to tell her she needs to quit contacting him. Just my opinion!!
keri125 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 03:50 PM   #22
And how are YOU feeling?
My happy thought: Sitting on Main Street eating ice cream.
Can't tell the difference between Burger King and Wendys
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Bergen County, NJ
Posts: 10,145

Not at all since the day we ended our marriage in court.
luvwinnie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 03:56 PM   #23
DVC Member BWV 99
You have to compare apples to apples
DebbieB's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 1999
Location: PA
Posts: 48,564

My brother and his second wife had a friendly divorce, they were only married 2 years. She took him to the hospital for his vasectomy a couple of years later!
DebbieB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 05:42 PM   #24
Tres Charming
I cry at a drop of a hat
55 scares me
Can you dip the shortbread in chocolate?
*~*The T.F*~*
let the stupidity begin!
Stitchfans's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Illinois
Posts: 11,141

Originally Posted by nuke View Post
I have a teenager and I still only contact him if absolutely necessary. If there were no kids involved it would be zero contact.
Same here. Can not afford to have too much contact with him. Every time I do it seems to cost me something. When he comes to visit our DD he always seems to arrive just before we sitting down to a meal.
Stitchfans is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 06:01 PM   #25
She changes friends like she changes underwear
kellyg403's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 5,358

Nada. I have no desire and evidently neither does he. We get along fine in person and most people don't even know we don't speak to each other.

We have kids together but the youngest is 16. They pretty much make their own visitation schedule. The only time it involves me is if I need to drive someone to the airport.

I have a friend who goes to Thanksgiving still at her ex and his new wife's house. Its a big family thing. They have helped her out financially through the years. Their adult son has a few issues and still lives with her. He has had a few addictions over the years. I don't think it is a perfect relationship but they seem to get a long well. My friend was married to him for 20 years and this relationship has lasted at least 12.

My dh and his ex swing the opposite way. Dear Lord, I have no idea how they lived together for 17 years. The have been divorced 16 years and STILL fight. Over nothing. They have never fought over anything worthwhile in all the years I have known them. Since their last dd turned 18 they haven't spoken in about 8 months. I don't ask him if he has spoken to her and he doesn't say. It works great.

kellyg403 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 06:24 PM   #26
what do you all think?
ilovejack02's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Denham Springs, La
Posts: 7,815

18yrs since I was married to first hubby .. we have had almost no contact. About 5 yrs in , I called him to fix our AC .. told him he owed me , which he did since I paid off some of his bills. He works for family ac company. I see him from time to time, but not by choice, we live in same small town. Usually it is a smile and wave across a store , once or twice we have actually spoken as we were right next to each other .

My ex SIL was 11 when we divorced.. she is now my DS10's math teacher . I didn't say a word when I realized it , figured she wouldn't recognize me . We were emailing back and forth about my DS10 having issues on a concept and she finally brought it up to me LOL. Well at least that elephant is out of the room now. She is super sweet , adores my child thank goodness. I also now run into her mother .. my ex MIL all the time too since ex sil started working at school. Good Lord , what a small world. They are not from this area, but all moved here several years ago. Since she began working at school, I finally spilled beans to DS10 about being married before, JUST IN CASE it came out .. her kids also are at school. Jack asked if that meant she was his "step Aunt " LOL.
ilovejack02 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 06:58 PM   #27
DIS Veteran
anniemck's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 531

Ex H and I were married for 18 years, divorced for almost 8 years now. We do have 3 kids together, youngest is now 21, and middle daughter just married last month so we have had quite a bit of contact this past year about the wedding. Other than that not much at all. We are still friends, had an amicable divorce and we are both happy with the way things have turned out. I remarried last year, and he is getting married next year.
When the kids were younger, we saw each other weekly for the child support, he paid me in cash which was great. We would go to dinner for the girls birthdays and that was all.

Official Disney Freak...
Presidents Day Weekend Twirlmania 2000-2012
Halloween 2011
Mothers Day, August, September, Osborne Family Lights 2012
DCL Wonder March 2013
15 cruises on other lines since 2007
6 trips to Gatlinburg/Pigeon Forge since 2009
Love vacations...
anniemck is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 07:19 PM   #28
DIS Veteran
NikitaZee's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 2,517

My first husband and divorced after 7 years of marriage (mutual decision). His family was scattered and not close, so he became very close to mine. No kids, but we shared a beloved pet (although our dog ultimately chose my ex). We spoke often at first, were good friends and stayed close. His first girlfriend was very good about the frequent contact - I remember thinking that I would not have been as understanding as she was! But, as things go, we slowly drifted apart, contact became less and less - and we haven't spoken for 10 years. I'm facebook friends with his sister so I have a general idea of what he's up to, and probably vice-versa, but it just naturally ran its course.
NikitaZee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 07:28 PM   #29
Kathryn Merteuil
Barden Bella
Kathryn Merteuil's Avatar
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Margaritaville
Posts: 6,237

My ex husband and I have had no contact for like 17 years.
Kathryn Merteuil is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-12-2013, 08:07 PM   #30
Disney Doll
DIS Security Matron
Disney  Doll's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Too far from WDW!! :(
Posts: 29,046

My borther & his first wife had no children together so no need to stay in contact. To the best of my knowledge they ahve not spoken since their divorce probably 25-30 years ago.

I do not have an ex-husband but do have several ex-boyfriends. While I wish them all well, I am not friends with any of them....nor am I in contact. I have bumped into a few of them occasionally through the years...it's kind of "hi how are you?"
Disney Doll
Prepare your child for the path, not the path for your child.
Stop telling your God how big the storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is.
It's time to put on your big girl panties and deal with it!
Don't be so open-minded that your brains fall out.
There's no pill that cures stupid.
He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog.
You are his life, his love, his leader.
He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart.
You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.
~~In loving memory of Teddy~~1994-2007~~
Disney  Doll is offline   Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

facebooktwitterpinterestgoogle plusyoutubeDIS Updates

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:05 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

Copyright © 1997-2014, Werner Technologies, LLC. All Rights Reserved.