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Old 02-26-2013, 10:08 PM   #16
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He can always make extra cash by picking up a second job part-time. Where there's a will there's a way.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:14 PM   #17
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Originally Posted by stardebby View Post
He lives in North Carolina I'm not sure how they figure the amount but, he is really going to have a hard time. Plus the fact I live in Florida and he is pretty much by himself there. All he does is work and every day off he gets the kids so he feels like he had no life. I know divorce is hard on everyone but its breaking my heart to see him suffer.
Hahaha, well he won't get much sympathy there. I don't have a life, either, and we're still married There will be time to live it up, again, after they're grown.

It looks like it's based on custody, income, how many kids, any other support payments, insurance, the number of overnights, child care costs, and the child's circumstances that may require more care. I found a chart that listed a basic support payment schedule very easily by googling. You should do a little research so that you'll have an idea of what's expected. It may ease your mind a bit.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:15 PM   #18
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Please tell me you're being sarcastic and that he doesn't only have to pay child support for one of four children.
Well, what I am actually saying is he waited until only one of them is under 18. He has 4 kids. Actually, he did pay 6 months for one until she turned 18 (same age as his GF ) but quickly cut her off. Another child is college aged but had to drop out and work. Dad's not helping anyone get their education (except the GF, I suppose). But I'm sure he's glad of his timing in all this so he did not have to pay CS for 4.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:22 PM   #19
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Originally Posted by Jennasis
He can always make extra cash by picking up a second job part-time. Where there's a will there's a way.
He works about 55-60 hours a week now. So it might be hard for him. I know I opened a can of worms here and everybody wants to say just shut up and take care of your children. It's just hard for me as his Mother we have had so much to deal with this past year. His Dad was only 50 when he died.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:25 PM   #20
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He works about 55-60 hours a week now. So it might be hard for him. I know I opened a can of worms here and everybody wants to say just shut up and take care of your children. It's just hard for me as his Mother we have had so much to deal with this past year. His Dad was only 50 when he died.
So do I...and I have a part-time job on top of that. You do what you have to do to get by.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:28 PM   #21
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He can always make extra cash by picking up a second job part-time. Where there's a will there's a way.
In AR, they would reevaluate the CS, and increase it based on the 2nd job, too. It's ~25% net income for CS for one child. It is increased for each additional child, but I'm not sure how much. My current had to pay it to his ex, and my ex was supposed to pay me. Guess which one did not pay.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:41 PM   #22
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I know I will get no sympathy here. And I know the amount of child support he has to pay is to state guidelines. I have no experience with divorce and child support and didn't realize how things work.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:42 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by stardebby View Post
He works about 55-60 hours a week now. So it might be hard for him. I know I opened a can of worms here and everybody wants to say just shut up and take care of your children. It's just hard for me as his Mother we have had so much to deal with this past year. His Dad was only 50 when he died.
I am very sorry for your loss. That has got to be really tough.

However, your first priority in this situation should be making sure your son provides the kids with a comfortable life not making sure he has a social life.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:48 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by stardebby View Post
He works about 55-60 hours a week now. So it might be hard for him. I know I opened a can of worms here and everybody wants to say just shut up and take care of your children. It's just hard for me as his Mother we have had so much to deal with this past year. His Dad was only 50 when he died.
I am so sorry for your loss.

I just think you and your son need to realize that lifestyles change when divorce happens. His kids deserve to get the "first fruits" from their parents. He might have to rent a more reasonably priced place.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:55 PM   #25
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I know I will get no sympathy here. And I know the amount of child support he has to pay is to state guidelines. I have no experience with divorce and child support and didn't realize how things work.
Divorce and child support/parenting plans aren't fun for any involved people also seem to jump on the " dead beat dad" band wagon so quickly. My only experiences have been quite the opposite , With dead beat moms- so i guess I've never understood this . My own dad raised us without any help of any kind from my mother. My DH and I have always had our older kids full time, and never got the child support their bio mom owed. Even with the courts and support enforcement we only got a fraction of the funds owed- we ended up paying our attorney more in fees than we received, what a headache.

There are great dads out there, I wish your son the best and hope he's able to adjust and keep the rental for his kiddos.
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Old 02-26-2013, 10:55 PM   #26
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I am very sorry for your loss. That has got to be really tough.

However, your first priority in this situation should be making sure your son provides the kids with a comfortable life not making sure he has a social life.
It's really not about him having a social life he doesn't need one now. It's just about him being able to pay his bills and afford to eat. With the loss of my husband I'm in no position to help him financial. He didn't want out of the marriage she left him. I know he is not perfect but he wanted to try and save the marriage but she had an affair.
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Old 02-26-2013, 11:03 PM   #27
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Why do I get the feeling this is going to turn into another thread like the one luvsjack started a couple weeks ago?
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Old 02-26-2013, 11:03 PM   #28
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It's really not about him having a social life he doesn't need one now. I just want him to be able to take care of his kids and himself. With the loss of my husband I'm in no position to help him financial. He wasn't the one who wanted a divorce she left him. I know he's not perfect by he wanted to try and save the marriage but she left and had an affair.
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Old 02-26-2013, 11:10 PM   #29
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Divorce and child support/parenting plans aren't fun for any involved people also seem to jump on the " dead beat dad" band wagon so quickly. My only experiences have been quite the opposite , With dead beat moms- so i guess I've never understood this . My own dad raised us without any help of any kind from my mother. My DH and I have always had our older kids full time, and never got the child support their bio mom owed. Even with the courts and support enforcement we only got a fraction of the funds owed- we ended up paying our attorney more in fees than we received, what a headache.

There are great dads out there, I wish your son the best and hope he's able to adjust and keep the rental for his kiddos.
Thank you so much at least someone on here can understand. I know everyone thinks if Dads complain about how much child support they are paying it means they don't want to take care of their kids.
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Old 02-26-2013, 11:14 PM   #30
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I am very sorry for your loss. You know divorce is a very painful thing. All the things that revolve around every aspect of it can just rip out the heart. Not to mention what it does to the children. It also ruins everyone financially. I hope at some point she realizes that the grass it not greener on the other side.

I know you want the best for your son, and it is hard to stand by and watch. But all you can do is just try to support him to the best of your ability and be there for him to just listen. Remind him that what he is paying for are his children, and that it is still worth it. I hope it goes well for all of you.
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