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Old 02-24-2013, 06:41 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by shortkathleen View Post
Would you feel comfortable leaving your 10 and 12 year old in your dvc room while you and your spouse went out to dinner alone? It would
only be at the most 2 hours. We are considering it but I feel a little uneasy. (mainly because we would not be at our house) We would be close by, they are very responsible and we do it on occasion at home. They would just watch tv and play cards. What are your thoughts??
We did this with our 12 year old last May. He watched his 9 year old brother for us. I agree though, eat at the restaurant at your resort so that if you need to get to them quickly, you can. My boys were actually happy to have a respite from all the late nights and went to bed and were asleep by the time we returned.
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Old 02-25-2013, 10:59 AM   #17
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Sounds like I'm in the minority but I would never leave my kids unattended in a hotel room by themselves. But then again I wouldn't be in that position because I would never choose to go on a family vacation and then dump the kids so I could go to dinner alone. Different strokes for different folks.
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Old 02-25-2013, 11:37 AM   #18
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Sounds like I'm in the minority but I would never leave my kids unattended in a hotel room by themselves. But then again I wouldn't be in that position because I would never choose to go on a family vacation and then dump the kids so I could go to dinner alone. Different strokes for different folks.
i wouldn't call allowing one's preteen kids to hang out together in a WDW resort room "dumping" them a lot depends on the child(ren) tho, some kids shouldn't be left in their own bedroom alone.
i think allowing fairly mature 12 and 9yos to stay together in a locked resort room, with a direct connection to you via cel phone, notes on where you will be, and instructions (what they are/aren't allowed to do, how to use room phone, etc) is fine.
btw, both DH and i have always been heavily involved in our kids' lives (preschool/PTA boards, classmom, coach, volunteering from 6 months old, etc) - so no parental slacking
we gave them structure, trust, and direction during their lives, and had no problem allowing them to stay in our WDW resort while DH & i went to dinner for 2 hours. it wound up being an excellent decision: they felt they had earned our trust, and had a fantastic time just being with one another (apparently, they had long conversations, played games, and came to appreciate one another as people - that's hard when there are each one's friends, family, around).
i agree with PPs that the restaurant should be close, like in the same resort.

kids can't grow up if you tie them up - trusting them when you know you can, and allowing them a little bit of freedom based on that trust will help them grow into more emotionally healthy teens
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Old 02-25-2013, 11:39 AM   #19
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Sounds like I'm in the minority but I would never leave my kids unattended in a hotel room by themselves. But then again I wouldn't be in that position because I would never choose to go on a family vacation and then dump the kids so I could go to dinner alone. Different strokes for different folks.
I think this is a rude and condescending post. My guess is that, if we were to explore your life, there are many things that we would disagree with, too.

As for me, this will be the first year that we would consider leaving the kids in the room, although we have left them alone at home many times while we dash out food shopping and running errands. My sons will be ages 13 and 12. The older one is very, very responsible. We are going on a 2-week trip which will be one of 2 trips to Disney in the same calendar year. If we wanted to slip out for a dinner, I wouldn't consider it to be "dumping" my kids. In fact, after being together staying in a studio for 2 weeks, perhaps the time apart for a couple hours would be good for all of us.
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Old 02-25-2013, 02:03 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by stitch1094 View Post
Sounds like I'm in the minority but I would never leave my kids unattended in a hotel room by themselves. But then again I wouldn't be in that position because I would never choose to go on a family vacation and then dump the kids so I could go to dinner alone. Different strokes for different folks.
A little un-trusting, are we?

As a side note , I think using the word "dumping" is fairly inflammatory given the context of the discussion, as it and the rest to the paragraph intonates the parents on this board are irresponsible. Maybe a different set of words to explain the same idea, or is this description accurate.

As for myself, I would most definitely allow our DD at 12 year old to stay in the room alone, as well as roam around the resort with his/her sibling/friend. If they wanted to hit the arcade, activity room, nightly beach movie, etc then I would let them go by themselves, especially if we gave them a cell phone.

How else will they learn to be independent if they can't be trusted to wander around a Disney World resort unattended, which is likely safer than your neighborhood? Shoot, I used to watch my 5-6 year old brother when I was 7-8 years old after school, walking to/from school to boot! I think parents are a bit more over protective these days (myself included to a degree).
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Old 02-25-2013, 04:13 PM   #21
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We did this a few years ago and our kids where probably about the same age as the OP's kids.
We stayed at AKL Jambo House and went to dinner at Jikko for our Anniversary. We took the kids to the food court so they could get their dinner and dessert to eat in our room. We left them in the room with instructions on what to do in an emergency and what they were and were not allowed to do. DD had a cell phone and we both had ours, they also knew how to use the room phone.
We had a great dinner and the kids thought they were super cool.
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Old 02-25-2013, 04:34 PM   #22
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We have done exactly this on many occasions with our daughters when they were that age and even a bit younger. They are now 19 and 17 years old. However, we would not even think for one single second to allow the same thing with our son who is now 10. He just would not handle it at all nor do I believe that he would be able to handle it for years to come. It depends greatly on the individual.

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Old 02-25-2013, 04:37 PM   #23
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It completely depends on the maturity level of the kids, but yes, when my kids were that age I would have comfortably left them alone in the room for a couple of hours.
Couldn't have said it any better! With cell phones etc., I've allowed my son some freedom to run around with a friend or two in the resort! Just a quick phone call away and he was always very responsible, so no worries!

Now 16, I worry more about his whereabouts than I did at 10-12!
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Old 02-25-2013, 04:53 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by stitch1094 View Post
Sounds like I'm in the minority but I would never leave my kids unattended in a hotel room by themselves. But then again I wouldn't be in that position because I would never choose to go on a family vacation and then dump the kids so I could go to dinner alone. Different strokes for different folks.
Although I have never done a date night with my DH on a family vacation, it's only because our vacations are usually fairly short and my kids enjoy the signatures as much as I do. But I would NOT consider it "dumping" my kids if I did it! OP, do NOT feel guilty for wanting to do this. I have learned over the past couple of years how important it is to spend alone time with your spouse, and what better place to do it than at a nice restaurant away from home. When adults put time into their relationships, everyone in the family will be much happier.
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Old 02-25-2013, 07:05 PM   #25
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Old 02-25-2013, 09:01 PM   #26
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I wouldn't do it on the first couple of nights (they would have too much energy) of our vacation but afterwards if the kids are ok with it I say go for it.

Last edited by a742246; 02-26-2013 at 07:12 AM.
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Old 02-26-2013, 06:55 AM   #27
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I dream of the day our vacation includes 'dumping' my kids in the room and enjoying a dinner out with my DH, lol. I have a 7, 4 and 1yo so we are a ways off. I am thinking when oldest DD is about 12 and youngest is 6 I will be totally okay with it.

I am my oldest DD's Girl Scout Troop leader. We are working on our safety badge and had a police officer come talk to the girls last night. He talked to the girls (ages 7 to 11) about safety when they are alone. He went through how to call 911, what an emergency is, how to stay safe in different dangerous/scary situations. He seemed to think 8-10 is an appropriate age for children to be left alone, but helped teach them how to stay safe when no adults are close by.

I just thought I would mention that as I agree it depends on the child, but many kids are mature enough by age 10 to be left alone for a couple hrs.
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Old 02-26-2013, 07:18 AM   #28
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Originally Posted by stitch1094 View Post
Sounds like I'm in the minority but I would never leave my kids unattended in a hotel room by themselves. But then again I wouldn't be in that position because I would never choose to go on a family vacation and then dump the kids so I could go to dinner alone. Different strokes for different folks.
I'm pretty much the opposite - unless your kids are special needs or have behavioral problems, by ten and twelve mine had better be able to spend two hours in a hotel room alone (and did). If they can't do that at twelve - with cell phones and at Disney, which is a relatively safe place, and in a hotel room designed to be pretty child safe - how are they going to ever go to college at eighteen and live in a dorm? How are they going to manage a Spring Break trip with their friends in college? Are they going to be the only ones staying at home for the middle school overnight? The Senior Trip? You have five years between twelve and eighteen to get them ready to be adults - it won't happen magically on their eighteenth birthday and if it doesn't happen in baby steps, they are going to not be ready and miss out on some of the life experiences that make tween and teen years.

As for the family vacation, we spend time both as a family and as individuals and as subunits - its part of being a family - for the kids to understand that Mom and Dad do Mom and Dad things. And since we spend time as a family all year long, we don't need 24 hour a day togetherness on vacation.
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Old 02-26-2013, 08:24 AM   #29
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I think this is a rude and condescending post. My guess is that, if we were to explore your life, there are many things that we would disagree with, too.

As for me, this will be the first year that we would consider leaving the kids in the room, although we have left them alone at home many times while we dash out food shopping and running errands. My sons will be ages 13 and 12. The older one is very, very responsible. We are going on a 2-week trip which will be one of 2 trips to Disney in the same calendar year. If we wanted to slip out for a dinner, I wouldn't consider it to be "dumping" my kids. In fact, after being together staying in a studio for 2 weeks, perhaps the time apart for a couple hours would be good for all of us.
Wow. OK. I'm sure there is. OP asked a question. I answered. Maybe the word dumping wasnt the best choice but IMO I would not leave minors alone in a hotel room. Sorry if my answer wasn't what everyone wanted to hear.
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Old 02-26-2013, 08:30 AM   #30
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A little un-trusting, are we?

As a side note , I think using the word "dumping" is fairly inflammatory given the context of the discussion, as it and the rest to the paragraph intonates the parents on this board are irresponsible. Maybe a different set of words to explain the same idea, or is this description accurate.

As for myself, I would most definitely allow our DD at 12 year old to stay in the room alone, as well as roam around the resort with his/her sibling/friend. If they wanted to hit the arcade, activity room, nightly beach movie, etc then I would let them go by themselves, especially if we gave them a cell phone.

How else will they learn to be independent if they can't be trusted to wander around a Disney World resort unattended, which is likely safer than your neighborhood? Shoot, I used to watch my 5-6 year old brother when I was 7-8 years old after school, walking to/from school to boot! I think parents are a bit more over protective these days (myself included to a degree).
Actually, yes I am un-trusting. In today's world where you have teachers, religious leaders, neighbors etc who take advantage of kids its better to be untrusting. Maybe dumping wasnt the best choice but leaving kids alone in a hotel room, to me, is irresponsible. And really, letting a kid roam with a cell phone does what exactly? Do you except a young kid who might be in trouble to remain calm and collected enough to call for help? Most adults can't do that. There are many ways for kids to learn to be independent. I think leaving them alone in a hotel room isnt one of them.
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