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Old 02-16-2013, 01:32 PM   #1
luvmarypoppins
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For those in Maine - a death and burial ?

My cousins birth mom lives in Maine. She recently passed away and he went up for the funeral.

His mom was on life support by the time he got there from NJ.

He said they cant have the burial until the spring because of the ground being frozen etc.

Just wondering when in the spring that would happen. Would the body just go to the cemetary then etc.

I was thinking of sending some flowers then etc. Just dont know what the customs are there and what to do etc.

He says he feels terrible that he has to go through this again in the spring, like saying good bye twice. He is just beside himself and I dont know what to do or say. I think he is actually dreading going again.

So any insight or information would be helpful, TIA.
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Old 02-16-2013, 01:36 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luvmarypoppins View Post
My cousins birth mom lives in Maine. She recently passed away and he went up for the funeral.

His mom was on life support by the time he got there from NJ.

He said they cant have the burial until the spring because of the ground being frozen etc.

Just wondering when in the spring that would happen. Would the body just go to the cemetary then etc.

I was thinking of sending some flowers then etc. Just dont know what the customs are there and what to do etc.

He says he feels terrible that he has to go through this again in the spring, like saying good bye twice. He is just beside himself and I dont know what to do or say. I think he is actually dreading going again.

So any insight or information would be helpful, TIA.
That happens here as well. Typically the burial would happen in April once most of the snow is gone and the ground has started to thaw. After the funeral the casket is left in a vault until the burial. Often the burial is simply the immediate family and maybe some close friends.
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Old 02-16-2013, 01:40 PM   #3
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Mainer here. I'm trying to recall when the cemetery across the road from our garage starts spring burials....most likely Mid to late April. I've always told my husband he can't die in the winter months because I couldn't deal with saying goodbye twice. I am sorry for your cousins loss.
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Old 02-16-2013, 01:54 PM   #4
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My Uncle was on the board of a community cemetery in very rural northern Saskatchewan Canada.
They didn't want family at the actually burials in the spring because there are things the family just doesn't need to know about the first burials of the year. They wouldn't notify the family until afterwards.
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Old 02-16-2013, 05:45 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by tvguy View Post
My Uncle was on the board of a community cemetery in very rural northern Saskatchewan Canada.
They didn't want family at the actually burials in the spring because there are things the family just doesn't need to know about the first burials of the year. They wouldn't notify the family until afterwards.

What on Earth! What happens at the first burials of the year that family can't be there? I would want to be at my mom or dad's burial and it would take an extreme issue to keep me from it.
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Old 02-16-2013, 05:51 PM   #6
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I'm in Manitoba, Canada and have never heard of holding off on a funeral. I've been to 3 in the past month and 2 of them were burials. It happened right after the service and the ground was dug up.
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Old 02-16-2013, 05:59 PM   #7
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In New York, when my Great Aunt died (in November), they had the funeral service then. Then when the ground wasn't frozen, she was buried by the funeral home - no 2d service.
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Old 02-16-2013, 06:01 PM   #8
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Here in Minnesota it depends. Any funeral that I've been to in the southern half of the state buries year round. They often use heaters to warm the ground.

My step-uncle was buried in a very small cemetery just south of Duluth. He passed in January and it was below zero so the burial was held off until the spring. We didn't go back up for the actual burial. I am guessing my step-aunt and cousins were probably there, but they lived near there.
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Old 02-16-2013, 06:04 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by PelletierBears View Post
What on Earth! What happens at the first burials of the year that family can't be there? I would want to be at my mom or dad's burial and it would take an extreme issue to keep me from it.

I would like to know that as well. I have never heard of anything like that before.
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Old 02-16-2013, 06:12 PM   #10
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I live in maine and have a close friend that owns a funeral home. He said it depends on the cemetery and some times if the family wants to pay extra for ground to be thawed out. But most of his do not get buried until spring, usually April or may. Sorry for the loss, having to go through it twice is hard, I've been through it.
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Old 02-16-2013, 06:30 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luvmarypoppins View Post
My cousins birth mom lives in Maine. She recently passed away and he went up for the funeral.

His mom was on life support by the time he got there from NJ.

He said they cant have the burial until the spring because of the ground being frozen etc.

Just wondering when in the spring that would happen. Would the body just go to the cemetary then etc.

I was thinking of sending some flowers then etc. Just dont know what the customs are there and what to do etc.

He says he feels terrible that he has to go through this again in the spring, like saying good bye twice. He is just beside himself and I dont know what to do or say. I think he is actually dreading going again.

So any insight or information would be helpful, TIA.
In my experiences in NH - the "traditional" funeral is held immediately, so if you are wanting to send flowers you would want to do that now.

When the ground thaws enough for the burial it is usually a very small/short graveside service with just a few people in attendance and usually flowers aren't delivered there.
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Old 02-16-2013, 06:43 PM   #12
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Agree with others that the spring burial would tend to be an immediate family only sort of thing. The full service, ie with flowers, would be this week or whatever.
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Old 02-16-2013, 06:53 PM   #13
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Really.....here in Alberta Canada where the ground is frozen half the year they still do burials. They dig up the ground the same as during summer months.

We just buried my husbands cousin during a blizzard a few weeks ago and there was no waiting until the spring. I've never actually heard of that.
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Old 02-16-2013, 09:14 PM   #14
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My dad and mother both passed away in the winter...I am from maine also...and they were buried in the spring...It depends on the weather also..Beginning of May was the time for their burial..
They were placed in the vaults that are near the cemetery's...

Flowers to the funeral home are sometimes taken from the funeral home and placed at nursing homes for the patients there...we did this so not to waste the sending flowers..

How about sending a plant to his home at a future date...something that can be kept for longer
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Old 02-16-2013, 09:40 PM   #15
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DH's parents are from Millinocket, ME. He said as a boy the burials were always postponed til spring. But he's nearly 50, so maybe things have changed. OP, I'm sorry for your loss.
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