Disney Information Station Logo

Go Back   The DIS Discussion Forums - DISboards.com > Just for Fun > Community Board
Find Hotel Specials & DIScounts
 
facebooktwitterpinterestgoogle plusyoutubeDIS UpdatesDIS email updates
Register Chat FAQ Tickers Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read





Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 02-13-2013, 08:15 PM   #136
dana1003
DIS Veteran
 
dana1003's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: new joisey
Posts: 1,085

Hello... Didn't read every single post but did just want to give you my two cents. I'm 41 with twin girls, hubby works full time, my girls are in school and I get paid to watch my nephew every day. He pays me well but because of this I am home every day and do not have friends either. I'm closest to my mom and like you, I can't tell her everything. I feel lonely sometimes also even though I have a family. I want to ditto what someone said about volunteering and I see your starting a class? That's a start. You don't need to find a best friend, just being social and having something in common is enough sometimes. As you get older you will be able to work out problems without having to run it by a friend all the time. Hoping it's temporary as we all get down in the dumps sometimes. This new class sounds like a beginning and don't ever put your self worth in what someone else thinks about you. You have allot of people here that responded out of concern, people who have never met you ...good luck honey.
__________________
:artist
dana1003 is offline  
Old 02-13-2013, 08:36 PM   #137
nathalee81
DIS Veteran
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 660

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv4u859 View Post
help, advice, in a nice way. I did not come here for people to tell me i needed to be freaking medicated. I am not a social path, I do not need that. I did not come here to say its all your fault you have no one, yeah like everyone else i am sure I have done things to make people mad at me, who doesn't? I will be the first one to admit it, but it is not ALWAYS my fault. I did not come here for people to make me feel worse than I already do. I have been through a lot in my life and I probably do need to go to counseling, I will admit that, but that does not mean I am bipolar or crazy because of it and I am no where near selfish. Its crazy how everyone around me says I am a good person, but you all. I am a terrible person according to everyone here.

That is why I lashed out. It was way to much. I did not want to hear people pointing the finger, "YOU, YOU YOU!!!!!" when it is not always me.

That is one thing people on this thread do not realize. Your post made me feel TERRIBLE about myself, like I am a ****ty person when I am not. Of course I am going to be defensive if people are telling me, YOU have issues, YOU need help, YOU have no friends because of YOU, when it is not always me.
First of all, I believe you meant sociopath-and just to let you know, not everyone who is on medication is a sociopath. I needed medication after I gave birth because I was seriously depressed and I don't think I would qualify as a sociopath. That was a pretty hurtful statement, and I find that ironic considering you are talking about everyone hurting your feelings.

No, you are right it is not always YOU. But, you know, sometimes it is. I had to admit to myself that I was depressed and DO something about it. That is what you need to do, as well.

If you don't like your life, do something about it.

Get some professional help, really. It helps to talk to someone. It really does.

Cut off the friends that are toxic, end the drama.

Find the positive, good things in your life-focus on those and go forward.

Find things that interest you and do them. You have asked people what you should do, but you really need to decide what interests you and go with it. If the color run is something you like-go for it. And, if you can't find a friend to do it with you, go by yourself. And, if you like to go to Universal, go there by yourself, too.

It is okay to be by yourself. I think in our world being alone is considered a bad thing, but it really isn't. It is a great thing to learn to like being by yourself, to enjoy that time.

I don't think anyone here has been hurtful, and I think a lot of people have tried to help.

But, people can only help if you want it, and I really don't know if you want that right now...
nathalee81 is offline  
|
The DIS
Register to remove

Join Date: 1997
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 1,000,000
Old 02-13-2013, 08:39 PM   #138
Sabeking
DIS Veteran
 
Sabeking's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: NC
Posts: 1,159

OP years ago when I graduated from college and got a teaching job I had to start out in a new city. I knew no one and the town was so small that there was not much to do for a young single lady. I often felt very lonely and depressed. My friends that lived in other towns had busy lives and not much time for me. Looking back I did not realize how negative I sounded to others. I totally was feeling sorry for myself and I definitely got angry. I think also I had a real confidence issue. At some point I did end up going to counseling and it ended up being one of my best years because I really learned about me and what I liked. I bought this crappy bike and rode it all over town! I would ride it to the local church, the park ( and have picnic for one), I even ended up riding it to the school I worked at that year. I was getting exercise and spending time with me figuring out some things that had happened early on in life. At the end I really liked myself better and it showed to others. I was more up beat and my confidence grew. We all crave companionship; that's human nature! Sometimes being happy alone makes a way for others to want to be with you. I would take this opportunity to do some things you want to do. A time will come in life when you are married, have kids, friends and the demands will make you cherish the time alone. This is a growing season, embrace it. I wish you all the best
__________________
Rock-n-Roll Marathon 2014
Flying Pirate Half marathon 2014- Kitty Hawk
Sabeking is offline  
Old 02-13-2013, 08:54 PM   #139
Offsides
I enjoy being a girl
 
Offsides's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 271

Ah I said I was done posting but I also just wanted to say that I think you should do the Color Run even if you don't have a friend to do it with. They are an absolute BLAST. I went with some people from work last year but we got split up (different running paces) and I ended up meeting and hanging out with some other awesome people. It was seriously one of the most fun days I have had in quite a while. Don't miss out on it!!
__________________
Offsides is online now  
Old 02-13-2013, 10:10 PM   #140
luv4u859
Mouseketeer
 
luv4u859's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Central, NJ
Posts: 269

Quote:
Originally Posted by fall08CP

But you seem to be the common denominator.
And why yes you may see that here, you don't know how other people treat me
__________________
Names Tameka, but call me Meka :-)
24. Bday 11/15/1988- Scorpio baby. Residing in NJ.


Second cruise!!! Key west, fl and cozumel, mexico
luv4u859 is offline  
Old 02-13-2013, 10:13 PM   #141
luv4u859
Mouseketeer
 
luv4u859's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Central, NJ
Posts: 269

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offsides

Whoa. First of all, if anything I said specifically made you feel terrible, I am sorry. That truly was not my intent.

I find it offensive that you seem to be implying that people who are medicated are sociopaths. I am not speaking for anybody else, but the only reason I brought up medication (and talking to someone) is because it helped ME when I was going through some issues. I don't consider myself crazy, bipolar, or a sociopath and I will willingly admit that I took medication AND spoke with someone. And you know what, it really really helped me. I understand that you are upset and hurting and so you are getting defensive.. but before you talk about how everyone on here is terrible, you should try to be a little more sensitive yourself about the things you are saying.

I think most people posting had good intentions. I did not take most posts as being mean or hurtful. Most likely, people can relate to the situation and were relaying to you things that may have helped them overcome the same thing.

You're the one asking for help, so I think that could be a reason why most people were suggesting things YOU could do to help your situation. We are only talking to you and we only "know" you, so that is where our focus is. And yes, it does take 2 people to make any relationship, but we are only talking to ONE of those people right now, so that is why you are the focus.

Anyway. It is clear that I am only offending you, even when I am trying to help, so I guess I will just say.. Good luck to you. I hope that you can get it figured out. I think you have the tools you need, you just have to implement them. I wish you the best.
I only said the social path comment because someone suggested I was bipolar.

And exactly what you said, that is what I was trying to get across. I am only ONE person in the hole thing, no one knows how people treat me so it shouldn't be all fingers pointed at me unless you know both sides.

I'm sorry, I know I quoted you but I didn't mean you personally. I am sorry if I offended you.
__________________
Names Tameka, but call me Meka :-)
24. Bday 11/15/1988- Scorpio baby. Residing in NJ.


Second cruise!!! Key west, fl and cozumel, mexico
luv4u859 is offline  
Old 02-13-2013, 10:15 PM   #142
luv4u859
Mouseketeer
 
luv4u859's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Central, NJ
Posts: 269

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offsides
Ah I said I was done posting but I also just wanted to say that I think you should do the Color Run even if you don't have a friend to do it with. They are an absolute BLAST. I went with some people from work last year but we got split up (different running paces) and I ended up meeting and hanging out with some other awesome people. It was seriously one of the most fun days I have had in quite a while. Don't miss out on it!!
Yeah I am, one of my friends said she'll do it with me. I am really excited about it. Going to sign up as soon as my check direct deposits lol
__________________
Names Tameka, but call me Meka :-)
24. Bday 11/15/1988- Scorpio baby. Residing in NJ.


Second cruise!!! Key west, fl and cozumel, mexico
luv4u859 is offline  
Old 02-13-2013, 10:21 PM   #143
luv4u859
Mouseketeer
 
luv4u859's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Central, NJ
Posts: 269

Quote:
Originally Posted by nathalee81

First of all, I believe you meant sociopath-and just to let you know, not everyone who is on medication is a sociopath. I needed medication after I gave birth because I was seriously depressed and I don't think I would qualify as a sociopath. That was a pretty hurtful statement, and I find that ironic considering you are talking about everyone hurting your feelings.

No, you are right it is not always YOU. But, you know, sometimes it is. I had to admit to myself that I was depressed and DO something about it. That is what you need to do, as well.

If you don't like your life, do something about it.

Get some professional help, really. It helps to talk to someone. It really does.

Cut off the friends that are toxic, end the drama.

Find the positive, good things in your life-focus on those and go forward.

Find things that interest you and do them. You have asked people what you should do, but you really need to decide what interests you and go with it. If the color run is something you like-go for it. And, if you can't find a friend to do it with you, go by yourself. And, if you like to go to Universal, go there by yourself, too.

It is okay to be by yourself. I think in our world being alone is considered a bad thing, but it really isn't. It is a great thing to learn to like being by yourself, to enjoy that time.

I don't think anyone here has been hurtful, and I think a lot of people have tried to help.

But, people can only help if you want it, and I really don't know if you want that right now...
I don't have a problem being alone, sometimes I enjoy it. It's just I am an only child and as a child I was always alone playing, I love when I have a big group of people, it's so much fun to me. I did not mean to offend you, I only said it because someone mentioned bipolar. I'm not happy and sad the next moment.

This is a really big deal to me, idk I guess because I think of the future a lot, I think one day I want to get married and will have no friends to be in my wedding or come to the wedding. Or I think about when I have a baby, I won't have that close friend who I want my child's god parent to be, that's the moments I get upset about it. It will probably be years from now but that's how I feel. I am in the process of trying to buy a house as well and I am scared to plan another house warming because I feel that no one will come.

It really hurts to feel like you have no one to talk to...
__________________
Names Tameka, but call me Meka :-)
24. Bday 11/15/1988- Scorpio baby. Residing in NJ.


Second cruise!!! Key west, fl and cozumel, mexico
luv4u859 is offline  
Old 02-13-2013, 10:23 PM   #144
Offsides
I enjoy being a girl
 
Offsides's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 271

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv4u859 View Post
Yeah I am, one of my friends said she'll do it with me. I am really excited about it. Going to sign up as soon as my check direct deposits lol
Awesome. They're so much fun. Have a blast!
__________________
Offsides is online now  
Old 02-13-2013, 10:53 PM   #145
LiveYourLife
Creator of the: "I'm typing. And I'm backspacing. I'm typing. And I'm backspacing." therapeutic response for frustrated DISers.
 
LiveYourLife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: On a plane to Vegas
Posts: 860

You are 100% correct, we are only getting one side of the situation, which is your side. I don't know you from Adam, and just by reading your agressive responses to those who don't agree with you, it appears as if you have a very short fuse. Maybe your friends feel like they are walking on eggshells around you. You are being perceived here as the type of friend that most consider exhausting. Perception is very much reality in the world today.

I did see that you have found a class at Michael's, and are going to do the Color Run, that is fantastic news, and I hope you enjoy them and are able to make new friends!

Best of luck to you, Meka.
__________________
Sent via pen, paper, and carrier pigeon using DISboards

Last edited by LiveYourLife; 02-13-2013 at 10:54 PM. Reason: Grammar
LiveYourLife is offline  
Old 02-14-2013, 05:48 AM   #146
Mkrop
I just cant go on demand
Hi my name is Mkop and I am a cart leaver!
 
Mkrop's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Philly Suburbs!!!!
Posts: 10,333

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv4u859 View Post
help, advice, in a nice way. I did not come here for people to tell me i needed to be freaking medicated. I am not a social path, I do not need that. I did not come here to say its all your fault you have no one, yeah like everyone else i am sure I have done things to make people mad at me, who doesn't? I will be the first one to admit it, but it is not ALWAYS my fault. I did not come here for people to make me feel worse than I already do. I have been through a lot in my life and I probably do need to go to counseling, I will admit that, but that does not mean I am bipolar or crazy because of it and I am no where near selfish. Its crazy how everyone around me says I am a good person, but you all. I am a terrible person according to everyone here.

That is why I lashed out. It was way to much. I did not want to hear people pointing the finger, "YOU, YOU YOU!!!!!" when it is not always me.

That is one thing people on this thread do not realize. Your post made me feel TERRIBLE about myself, like I am a ****ty person when I am not. Of course I am going to be defensive if people are telling me, YOU have issues, YOU need help, YOU have no friends because of YOU, when it is not always me.
You really need to take a step back and reread this post. This was uncalled for. People here have given many helpful suggestions. And because they dont "know" you they should consider other possibilities...BUT that is no reason to go off on them bc you dont see yourself that way. Take some time for self refelction too, that is what everyone is telling you to do. Sometime there are things that we are doing that push people away, and sometimes they are the toxic ones, it could be a combo of both. Only you know that...and YOU put this thread out there, you need to take the good and the bad posts. But so far I saw nothing to set you off like that.

Good luck with the cake class and Color Run
__________________
DH Me DS16 : DS11
2002 Contemporary
April -May 2007 Contemporary
June 2008 Contemporary
Dec 2008 Boardwalk Inn
June 2009 Disneyland Hotel and DCA
Jan 2010 DVC Boardwalk Villas
Dec 2010 DVC BLT
July-Aug 2011 Disneyland Park Vue Inn
Dec 2011 DVC BW
July 2012 DVC BC
Dec 2013 DVC AKL/BW
Mkrop is offline  
Old 02-14-2013, 06:02 AM   #147
Disney Doll
DIS Security Matron
 
Disney  Doll's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Too far from WDW!! :(
Posts: 28,608

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv4u859 View Post
No because even when I looked up people who had the same problem, they are 3 years in and still have pain. People just need to listen to me when I say things. I know what I am talking about. I am lucky I got away with only one screw. It is just the type of injury I have, no seeing another doctor will change it. Not all orthopedics will even touch the type of injury I had. When I first saw my doctor he told me he does not like these because they are so bad. Also when I went to the ER the night of the accident, they told me "minor" break, when I went to the doctors he said its not minor and that many ER doctors don't know that it is very severe. Look it up lisfranc injury.

I do like to cook. Over the summer I was looking for classes at michaels or ac Moore to learn to make different things. I would love to do that, right now it's tough tho because I work all day and that's when there classes are.
I am listening to you and what I am hearing is someone who is choosing to remain in the situation she is in.

I have been a nurse for 30 years. Trust me when I tell you that in 90% of the medical cases I have encountered throughout 30 years of nursing, that there is AWAYS something else that can be done or there is ALWAYS another MD who might have a different "approach" on how to look at a medical problem and perhaps help improve it.

I'll sign off the thread now because if you choose not to help yourself, then no one here is going to be able to help you.
I hope you seek professional counselling to work on yourself.
I believe that when you do that, many other areas of your life will fall into place.

I wish you well.
__________________
Disney Doll
Prepare your child for the path, not the path for your child.
Stop telling your God how big the storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is.
It's time to put on your big girl panties and deal with it!
Don't be so open-minded that your brains fall out.
There's no pill that cures stupid.
He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog.
You are his life, his love, his leader.
He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart.
You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.
~~In loving memory of Teddy~~1994-2007~~

Last edited by Disney Doll; 02-14-2013 at 06:14 AM.
Disney  Doll is offline  
Old 02-14-2013, 06:25 AM   #148
luv4u859
Mouseketeer
 
luv4u859's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Central, NJ
Posts: 269

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mkrop View Post
You really need to take a step back and reread this post. This was uncalled for. People here have given many helpful suggestions. And because they dont "know" you they should consider other possibilities...BUT that is no reason to go off on them bc you dont see yourself that way. Take some time for self refelction too, that is what everyone is telling you to do. Sometime there are things that we are doing that push people away, and sometimes they are the toxic ones, it could be a combo of both. Only you know that...and YOU put this thread out there, you need to take the good and the bad posts. But so far I saw nothing to set you off like that.

Good luck with the cake class and Color Run
why was it uncalled for? that is how people made me feel. I do not have a short fuse but when I feel people are attacking me and pointing fingers yeah I am going to get defensive. I said this so many times and people are not seeing that. Yeah maybe to YOU there was nothing said to make me upset, but to me there was. It was not about you as a person, it was about me. I have a right to feel the way I do. Everyone's emotions are different.
__________________
Names Tameka, but call me Meka :-)
24. Bday 11/15/1988- Scorpio baby. Residing in NJ.


Second cruise!!! Key west, fl and cozumel, mexico
luv4u859 is offline  
Old 02-14-2013, 06:44 AM   #149
NHdisneylover
Lanyards are taking all my poor organizatioanl skills
mice and such creatures tend to like to travel aorund
 
NHdisneylover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Heidelberg, Germany (formally from New Hampshire)
Posts: 13,298

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv4u859 View Post
why was it uncalled for? that is how people made me feel. I do not have a short fuse but when I feel people are attacking me and pointing fingers yeah I am going to get defensive. I said this so many times and people are not seeing that. Yeah maybe to YOU there was nothing said to make me upset, but to me there was. It was not about you as a person, it was about me. I have a right to feel the way I do. Everyone's emotions are different.
And,that, right there is your issue. How often in your life are you taking things that your friends do that are not meant to be hurtful and being hurt by them anyway and then getting mean and defensive and lashing out at people who are trying to be friendly because of your different interpretation?

Do you not see how this could be off putting and could be seen as selfish?

You are correct that you have every right to fell however it is that you are feeling; however that does not give you a right to expect people to want to befriends with you if you lash out at them for doing or saying things which the majority of people would not see as rude or mean.
__________________
Hadley

My blog about my wanderings and ramblings in Europe, Disney and where ever else life takes me:

http://hadleyswanderingsandramblings.blogspot.de/
NHdisneylover is offline  
Old 02-14-2013, 06:56 AM   #150
Mkrop
I just cant go on demand
Hi my name is Mkop and I am a cart leaver!
 
Mkrop's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Philly Suburbs!!!!
Posts: 10,333

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv4u859 View Post
why was it uncalled for? that is how people made me feel. I do not have a short fuse but when I feel people are attacking me and pointing fingers yeah I am going to get defensive. I said this so many times and people are not seeing that. Yeah maybe to YOU there was nothing said to make me upset, but to me there was. It was not about you as a person, it was about me. I have a right to feel the way I do. Everyone's emotions are different.
Bc people are trying to help you on a thread YOU started! You have a right to your feelings, but you should think twice about lashing out. You shouldnt flip out on people who are trying to help...it is counterproductive.

I am sorry you cant see that.

Best of luck
__________________
DH Me DS16 : DS11
2002 Contemporary
April -May 2007 Contemporary
June 2008 Contemporary
Dec 2008 Boardwalk Inn
June 2009 Disneyland Hotel and DCA
Jan 2010 DVC Boardwalk Villas
Dec 2010 DVC BLT
July-Aug 2011 Disneyland Park Vue Inn
Dec 2011 DVC BW
July 2012 DVC BC
Dec 2013 DVC AKL/BW
Mkrop is offline  
Closed Thread



Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

facebooktwitterpinterestgoogle plusyoutubeDIS Updates
GET OUR DIS UPDATES DELIVERED BY EMAIL



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:32 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

Copyright © 1997-2014, Werner Technologies, LLC. All Rights Reserved.