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Old 02-13-2013, 05:33 AM   #91
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DisneyCrazyMomma View Post
Thank you. I guess I am of the opinion that if you don't see why I am annoyed, then why are you posting about it? Obviously it was something that bothered me at the time... how is everyone with the "who cares" attitude helping me? Sorry, not attacking you, but I see plenty of posts I don't agree with, and I don't post "who cares" or - I just move on.
If you don't want opinions, you probably shouldn't post it on an internet board. I'm not even being snarky, I'm serious. I do it myself. Before I start anything I ask myself if I want to hear what people think about this issue (even if I think it's a non-issue). If I'm sensitive about it, no way do I post it. It's just the way it is. And this place is tame....very, very tame.
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Old 02-13-2013, 05:33 AM   #92
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To be honest, it wouldn't bother me at all.

We're in the process of planning a kitchen remodel for this summer. I'm getting advice and ideas from a variety of place, and sharing what I learn with a number of friends who are doing post-Sandy renovations.

It's just home decor, not life and death. If someone takes my ideas and constructs the exact same kitchen, so be it.

If it were my mother in law, it would make me and my family that much more at home in her kitchen.
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Old 02-13-2013, 07:27 AM   #93
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ckay87 View Post
If you don't want opinions, you probably shouldn't post it on an internet board. I'm not even being snarky, I'm serious. I do it myself. Before I start anything I ask myself if I want to hear what people think about this issue (even if I think it's a non-issue). If I'm sensitive about it, no way do I post it. It's just the way it is. And this place is tame....very, very tame.
You're right, I know you're right. And to be fair, several people who gave me different perspectives were nice about it, and I do know that imitiation is the sincerest form of flattery, etc. It's the people who posted "who cares" and "I don't see why you care" and that's it. To me, that's just rude. Obv. I cared. I'm over it now, but a few of the posts felt a little trollish. I mean, yes, everyone is different and it makes the world great... I have just read LOTS of topics on here where there are pages and pages of no snarky people, and I guess I don't understand why my post brought up so much negativity. Even if I did overeact, is it necessary for someone to be rude? LOL, this got long, it's early... I just was expecting other MIL stories I guess. Have a great day!
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Old 02-13-2013, 07:30 AM   #94
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Originally Posted by DisneyCrazyMomma View Post
Thank you. I guess I am of the opinion that if you don't see why I am annoyed, then why are you posting about it? Obviously it was something that bothered me at the time... how is everyone with the "who cares" attitude helping me? Sorry, not attacking you, but I see plenty of posts I don't agree with, and I don't post "who cares" or - I just move on.


This post show exactly where the problem is. You cannot let anything, even trivial things, go.
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Old 02-13-2013, 07:36 AM   #95
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DisneyCrazyMomma View Post
You're right, I know you're right. And to be fair, several people who gave me different perspectives were nice about it, and I do know that imitiation is the sincerest form of flattery, etc. It's the people who posted "who cares" and "I don't see why you care" and that's it. To me, that's just rude. Obv. I cared. I'm over it now, but a few of the posts felt a little trollish. I mean, yes, everyone is different and it makes the world great... I have just read LOTS of topics on here where there are pages and pages of no snarky people, and I guess I don't understand why my post brought up so much negativity. Even if I did overeact, is it necessary for someone to be rude? LOL, this got long, it's early... I just was expecting other MIL stories I guess. Have a great day!
Who wasn't nice? I didn't really see anyone being rude or insulting. It is not like people posted that you are crazy for caring or anything. All I see are posts agreeing with your feelings and posts where some of us would have a different reaction.
I think, based on this, that perhaps you are a little quick to take things personally or as insults which really are not that at all. I wonder if that could be one small piece of your issues with your mother in law.
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Old 02-13-2013, 07:57 AM   #96
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Originally Posted by deserrai View Post
She probably has my sense of creativity...nonexistent. She must have liked what you were doing.
This is what I was going to say. Some people have no sense of design and when they see something they like, they duplicate it.

Wouldn't bother me at all.

And I'm with the others...consider it a compliment because that is exactly what it is. Obviously you have a knack for design and putting a space together so that it works well together.
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Old 02-13-2013, 09:30 AM   #97
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NHdisneylover View Post
Who wasn't nice? I didn't really see anyone being rude or insulting. It is not like people posted that you are crazy for caring or anything. All I see are posts agreeing with your feelings and posts where some of us would have a different reaction.
I think, based on this that perhaps you are a little quick to take things personally or as insults which really are not that at all. I wonder if that could be one small piece of your issues with your mother in law.


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Old 02-13-2013, 09:49 AM   #98
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Little late to the discussion, but I totally get where you are coming from, OP. I'm glad you found some new things that you are going to go with now, and got some positive out of the annoyance. Chalkboard space...hmmmm..I kind of like that idea...

I do understand though. When we first started painting when our townhome was new..I stenciled ivy in my kitchen. A friend saw, and mentioned she'd like to do something like that, but asked if I could do it for her (which I did..no problem. I had the paints and the stencils). My ex lives about 3 minutes away, and the first time I walked in their home after we had finished with our painting...he had the green kitchen with ivy (like mine) and a red focus wall in their living room behind their tv (like mine). I was a little taken aback, and at first...a little creeped out, lol...but it became no big deal as time went on. We will be repainting this summer, so those things will be gone, and they will have them still. THEN I'll see if they follow suit again, lol. We are friends, so no big deal really, but it really did sort of irk me at first.

Happy remodeling and yes, definitely share pictures when you are done!
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Old 02-13-2013, 10:17 AM   #99
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DisneyCrazyMomma View Post
Thanks for sharing! As do I realize it's not the end of the world. This is my husbands mother, so it 's not like I'm going to write her off or anything....



Are we related?



She had another color scheme all picked out, and ran it by me. I was trying to give her my honest opinion, and told her I thought that color she chose might clash with her countertops. Thought I was helping. Now I wish I'd just said I LOVE IT!
Hi OP...first off, congrat's on being able to make updates!Second, I have MIL issues so while I DO know where you are coming from...I wanted to point out that I think your MIL actually values your opinion and taste. Sounds like she listened when you said her choices clashed and went with something she trusted which was your colors. Was it intentional to hurt you? Maybe (you said she has been awful to you guys)was it a bummer to have happen, kinda....but as a DIL who has to keep on her toes myself ~mu MIL wouldn't have even bothered to ask my opinioin, so I think she values yours in her own way.

Quote:
Originally Posted by deserrai View Post
She probably has my sense of creativity...nonexistent. She must have liked what you were doing.
I think she liked it as well, and while she could have stepped a bit outside as to not copy directly, probably felt like she would havea kitchen just as nice.

Now the REAL issue...who's food is gonna taste better?
I hope you both enjoy your updated kitchens~and a heads up...tell your MIL your DH is too busy working on YOUR home to come help hers...just sayin'(unless you want him there to be the mole on what she really ends up with )
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Old 02-13-2013, 10:34 AM   #100
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pixiefairy View Post
Little late to the discussion, but I totally get where you are coming from, OP. I'm glad you found some new things that you are going to go with now, and got some positive out of the annoyance. Chalkboard space...hmmmm..I kind of like that idea...

I do understand though. When we first started painting when our townhome was new..I stenciled ivy in my kitchen. A friend saw, and mentioned she'd like to do something like that, but asked if I could do it for her (which I did..no problem. I had the paints and the stencils). My ex lives about 3 minutes away, and the first time I walked in their home after we had finished with our painting...he had the green kitchen with ivy (like mine) and a red focus wall in their living room behind their tv (like mine). I was a little taken aback, and at first...a little creeped out, lol...but it became no big deal as time went on. We will be repainting this summer, so those things will be gone, and they will have them still. THEN I'll see if they follow suit again, lol. We are friends, so no big deal really, but it really did sort of irk me at first.

Happy remodeling and yes, definitely share pictures when you are done!
Haha! Definitely go for a chalkboard space, I think it's going to be fun! And it's not like I invented that! I will try to share some before and after pics when we are done...

Quote:
Originally Posted by FINFAN View Post
Hi OP...first off, congrat's on being able to make updates!Second, I have MIL issues so while I DO know where you are coming from...I wanted to point out that I think your MIL actually values your opinion and taste. Sounds like she listened when you said her choices clashed and went with something she trusted which was your colors. Was it intentional to hurt you? Maybe (you said she has been awful to you guys)was it a bummer to have happen, kinda....but as a DIL who has to keep on her toes myself ~mu MIL wouldn't have even bothered to ask my opinioin, so I think she values yours in her own way.


I think she liked it as well, and while she could have stepped a bit outside as to not copy directly, probably felt like she would havea kitchen just as nice.

Now the REAL issue...who's food is gonna taste better? Mine! She steals my recipes too!

I hope you both enjoy your updated kitchens~and a heads up...tell your MIL your DH is too busy working on YOUR home to come help hers...just sayin'(unless you want him there to be the mole on what she really ends up with )
Thank you, this post made my day. I think you have some valid points... and good luck with your MIL too.
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