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Old 01-15-2013, 11:13 PM   #31
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My parents had my undergraduate college tuition paid for by the time I was 9. My grades were just fine, thanks. My parents have continued this tradition with a sizeable donation to the college fund of their 2 month old only granddaughter. I hope to have her college paid for by the time she starts elementary school.

I never want my kid to have to worry about paying for what I consider to be basic schooling. I know I don't have to pay, but I was brought up to place great value on education. To me, an undergraduate degree is a basic necessity. However, I expect she'll want more than that, and she's on her own for grad school.
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Old 01-15-2013, 11:15 PM   #32
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As long as they're proving worthy of it, I will do everything in my power to pay for my children's' education. I have no I'll feelings toward anyone who disagrees with this approach, but it's the one I intend to pursue.
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Old 01-15-2013, 11:27 PM   #33
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There are three things we spent money on during our son's first 18 years: education, books, and travel. We were able to save enough to pay cash for his first two years at a private university. He will take out sizeable student loans for the next two years; however, he is majoring in computer science in a program that will afford him the ability to pay off said loans very quickly. Allow me to warn anyone who thinks their kids will get scholarships or aid, it is very hard to go that route. We are middle-class folks who do OK, yet are in no position to write a check for $58,000 a year. Our expected contribution is $50,000 per year!!!! I am glad we were able to cover half of our son's tuition, but I would never go in debt myself or dip into retirement. The reality is most of our kids will have student loans. State universities are more affordable, but in California, many programs are impacted and you can't get your classes, therefore, you cannot graduate in 4 years. My advice is to select a major that will pay the bills. It is a different world today; sorry but philosophy doesn't pay the bills! By the way, if you co-sign your child's loans, please be sure to take out life insurance on your child in case the worst happens. YOu will still be responsible for the loans. Saw this firsthand with a friend who is now in massive debt at age 60.
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Old 01-15-2013, 11:37 PM   #34
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We save monthly for ds's college fund, hopefully we will be able to pay for most, if not all of it. It's in the budget just like any other regular expense.
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Old 01-15-2013, 11:40 PM   #35
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Originally Posted by ILUVALASKA View Post
My advice is to select a major that will pay the bills. It is a different world today; sorry but philosophy doesn't pay the bills!
And depending upon where you live, neither does Nursing, Health & Human Science or Education degrees! One of our kids had to move from Oregon to Texas to get a teaching job, and several exemplary nursing students we know are taking baby-sitting jobs to pay the bills while they wait for a nursing job to open up. It is really depressing!
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Old 01-16-2013, 12:34 AM   #36
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I don't have kids yet, but my parents paid for my education (I have a few minimal loans) and I could not be more grateful. I think about it literally every day how grateful I am that they did that for me. I still worked my butt off and got good grades. I plan to do the same for my kids if at all possible when the time comes.
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Old 01-16-2013, 12:49 AM   #37
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I'd love to know where all these ungrateful kids are that are always mentioned? I've yet to meet any personally. If I was raising kids who were ungrateful, I wouldn't be stupid enough to pay for their college education. As long as my kids take college seriously, I will pay the bills.

I am in favor of kids having some "skin in the game." For me, that means getting good enough grades and test scores to get scholarships. It doesn't mean when they turn 18 I give them a suitcase, show them the door, and wish them well.
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Old 01-16-2013, 12:49 AM   #38
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My kids are not bums. They work hard and appreciate the things and opportunities they have. They didn't get new cars or every toy they pointed at, but they knew from the day they realized what a college is that they would be going. Cost was not their worry as long as they went to one of North Carolina's great state universities. Two already have their degrees and one just had a good first semester. They have plenty of "skin in the game" -- their dreams and hopes for the future.
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Old 01-16-2013, 06:14 AM   #39
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The whole "Things are different now" phrase does not sit well with me.
I think it depends on the situation because it might very well be true. My husband and I have really had to work our way up in the world. When the twins were younger, we really struggled financially. We are doing good now but when we were younger, we were in no position. In fact, the twins (my step kids but still "mine") were a huge surprise to him which they know. He got their mom pregnant on their second date (SURPRISE!!! lol) and talked her into keeping them. I don't think they would be upset if we paid for our youngest to go to college.

While we are doing good now, we really struggled to get to where we are. I think if anything, THAT is what inspires them to work so hard for school. They like having their iphones and little luxeries. But they also remember living out of a trailer when they were younger and the long, slow struggle for hubby and I to make something of ourselves. They want to live the money we have now, or even better. Not the money we had (or lack of) when they were little. They know that road is a lot easier through college. They also chose career paths based in reality (i.e. not philosophy).

I just hope by the time they are done, their degrees will be worth something.
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Old 01-16-2013, 06:22 AM   #40
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I didn't save a dime because I couldn't. While both my husband and I worked, we had two kids in daycare ($$$$) for many years as well as a car payment, mortgage, etc. Saving for retirement is my #1 priority so I max that out.

I know have one in college full time. She is in her third year. I am on the "pay as you go plan" meaning I can just pay her tuition, books, and rent as the bills come in. Sort of like a daycare payment!!! She works part time and pays for all her other expenses.

My son will be going to college this year so I will have two in college for one year. That's going to be tough but I think I can do it.

I refuse to put my kids in student loan debt. I won't do it. I don't think they really have any concept of what they'd be getting themselves into.
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Old 01-16-2013, 06:28 AM   #41
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No, we absolutely intend to pay for four years at a public university or the equivalent. If I wasn't willing to do that, I wouldn't have had kids, personally.

My parents paid for my college education, and I graduated summa cum laude. It was by far, the best gift they gave me.

I worked all the way through, but no way was that enough to pay for everything. My education is a wonderful gift my parents gave me, starting my married life debt free...priceless.

I also had excellent grades.

I don't expect my children to lose their work ethic because they don't have student loans hanging over their heads.

We have saved for college and plan to help our children as much as we possibly can.
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Old 01-16-2013, 06:49 AM   #42
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My husband and I believe that our children should pay their own way through college. With that being said that doesn't mean they will be paying for every little thing. We will give money for books, food, and other things but the majority of it will be paid by them.
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Old 01-16-2013, 06:56 AM   #43
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Quote:
Parents’ Financial Support May Not Help College Grades
Published: January 14, 2013

Parents saving for college costs, take heed: A new national study has found that the more college money parents provide — whether in absolute terms or as a share of total costs — the lower their children’s college grades...


Every family has to decide this based on what is best for their situation. However, I would not rely on this statement as valid in any way. In my opinion, a child's grades (in general) will reflect more on the values and standards that were taught by the parents rather than money.

I was blessed to have my parents pay for the majority of my education. I worked and received assistance from my employer. In addition, I attended college classes while in high school at no cost to me, so that helped. How well I performed in school had nothing to do with whether or not that class was paid for by my parents.

I will not be able to pay for my son's education 100%. But I will do everything I can without going into debt to provide him with the same opportunity that I had.

That being said, I had a roommate who's parents could not afford pay for her college and she took out loans to pay for 100% of her schooling. I did have a lot of respect for someone who was so determined to better herself.

On the other hand, I had another friend whose parents were well off. She could not afford to go to college until she was older. Her parents opted to not help her with her education, but financial aid determined that she did not need any assistance because of her parents' income.
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Old 01-16-2013, 06:57 AM   #44
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I never have understood why people think parents should pay for college.
My parents were completely unable to help me with mine, so I don't see why any kid should feel entitled.

I also think you appreciate it more if you have to work for it.


There are plenty of programs to help with paying for college to the point that you can pursue any field without parents feeling obligated to pay.

Just my two cents on it all.
Why? Because educating my kids is part of my responsibility as a parent, and I think that in today's economy, college or trade school is a necessary part of one's education.

There really aren't "plenty of programs" that are going to enable kids to get out of college without having accumulated a mountain of debt. There are full ride scholarships, but they are very few and far between, and growing fewer all the time.
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Old 01-16-2013, 06:57 AM   #45
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Our oldest daughter is a college freshman and we are paying for her college at a public, 4 year in state university. She does not feel "entitled". She feels relieved that she does not have to worry about graduating buried in debt. She is also grateful, as she understands that we chose to do this for her and that it has involved a certain amount of sacrifice on our part over the years to do this for her. We gave her a nice childhood but we work very hard and are always budget conscious. She cheers for her university which is a huge time commitment and she still earned a 3.868 last semester which earned her a spot on both dean's list and the chancellor's list.

For those of you who say that your kids will have to get loans, please educate yourselves about what that means. It means that your child will be able to borrow approximately $5500 per year (a bit more after freshman year) in his or her own name. The rest of the loans will likely have to be co-signed by you, the parents, unless you are a very low income family. If your child is unable to or doesn't pay the loans, you will be responsible for them. Pell grants are only for the very low income. Scholarships are extremely competitive and full ride scholarships are becoming increasingly scarce. Meanwhile, college costs have risen so high that a college student has little hope of being able to earn enough to pay for a 4 year education on their own while still studying enough to earn good grades. Yes, your child can start at community college, attend a local university and live at home, etc. to save money. We wanted our daughter to have choices so we saved. We told her we would pay for a 4 year, in state public university and that is what she chose. We will offer the same to our youngest daughter. We will not commit to pay for grad school. For that, we will help out but we do not commit to pay for it entirely. Our oldest girl will almost certainly attend grad school and we will help as much as we can but we are saving for her younger sister's undergraduate education too.

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