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Old 01-15-2013, 07:50 PM   #31
DisneyFan32WI
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My teens don't have Facebook, but some of their friends have an account. I occasionally check up on her friends just to see what's happening.

Parents should be Facebook stalking! Too many parents are oblivious as to what is going on in their teen's world.
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Old 01-15-2013, 07:56 PM   #32
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I've creeped on the pages of my kid's friends & classmates from time to time. Schools do it. Employers do it.

Very enlightening.

And truthfully, I think more parents ought to do a little creeping themselves, at the very least on their own kid's pages. Some would be shocked at what they find that is available for all the world to see.

The kid who seems really nice and polite those few times you've talked with them might be a completely different person that you thought.

Social media has made the world our kids are growing up in very different from the one we knew.
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Old 01-15-2013, 09:05 PM   #33
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I creep on all my dd's stuff. But she knows it...that's part of having any account, email, fb, instagram....I'm a friend/follower. etc.

and yes, I have found something disturbing on instagram of one of her friends - she was talking a lot about cutting...talked with dd about it...couldn't decide what to do for a while, until she posted a pic. THen I contacted that mom, I am friends with that mom.

Our feelings are that if it would hurt the child or others then yes the parent should know about it.
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Old 01-15-2013, 09:16 PM   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luvmyfam444 View Post
I creep on all my dd's stuff. But she knows it...that's part of having any account, email, fb, instagram....I'm a friend/follower. etc.

and yes, I have found something disturbing on instagram of one of her friends - she was talking a lot about cutting...talked with dd about it...couldn't decide what to do for a while, until she posted a pic. THen I contacted that mom, I am friends with that mom.

Our feelings are that if it would hurt the child or others then yes the parent should know about it.
I found an email to my son, when he was 11, from a little girl he knew...she was writing about how she'd been communicating with a 30 year old man that had contacted her. I told my son that he needed to tell her that I read the email and tell her dad, or I'd tell her dad (who I knew). He later called me to thank me.
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Old 01-15-2013, 10:00 PM   #35
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For all those who say that they are friends with their kid on facebook... how do you know that what you see is actually their only facebook account? I'm asking in all seriousness... because I think the rule is a good one, but it seems to me that any kid who wants to get around that rule would very easily make two accounts. My DS is only 3, so I haven't really confronted this issue yet, but it has me stressed.
You can't be really sure. however if you are friends with your child's friends you would see the posts show up...most of the time on FB kids put pics of themselves...so even if the 2nd fb page was named sally sue you could lk @ the pics& figure it out.

My dd had 2 email acts for a while. We didn't have a problem with computers 'cause we only had 2 for a while - the laptop that I live on & the big computer which is in the kitchen for everyone to see. UNTIL the school gave them a computer.

I really haven't had a major problem per se, but she's spends way more time on it now....everything questionable is blocked by the school (even youtube). but having her own computer now has her emailing people during class (I know cause she emails me!)

kids move quickly nowadays changing the place they hang out. Most kids are on instagram & twitter now. But I hear of something new all the time & as soon as I do I quest dd & open an account if she has one too. Tumblr is growing in popularity. DD says she doesn't have an account, right now I trust her. Mainly because if she did have an account she would surely have downloaded the app on her phone.

So to answer your question, we don't know for sure, we just trust.

DD also must turn her phone in everynight & I read her texts regulary..she knows..that's part of having a phone and I make her hand it to me @ random times thru the day before she has time to delete...just in case.
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Old 01-16-2013, 04:53 AM   #36
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My kids don't have Facebook pages, though my older daughter has started to ask about it.

I told her that the day she opens an account, I'm opening one too. And I want complete access-- her screen name, password whatever.

I'm OK with postponing it for as long as I can... there's enough drama in being a middle school student, without the added drama of Facebook. But if she does really want it, you had better believe I'll be keeping my eye on things.
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Old 01-16-2013, 05:15 AM   #37
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My child doesn't have Facebook, but many of his classmates do. So, I was creeping around on their pages (public settings) to see what these kids are using it for... to decide whether I should let him open a page.

My question: Is that weird? To be creeping on those pages for that reason?

I saw something on one of the pages that bothered me and that I want to share with another parent. But, I don't want others to think I'm a freak for creeping on kids pages.
I know people do it. I was forever getting calls from my mother about my dd's FB. She is 21.

I used to do that, now I don't. I would MYOB if I were you, meaning I would not talk to the parents unless it was something nefarious.

They are all on Tumblr avoiding parents now anyway.
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Old 01-16-2013, 03:24 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by Tink888 View Post
I've creeped on the pages of my kid's friends & classmates from time to time. Schools do it. Employers do it.

Very enlightening.
Yeah, us adults need to be careful too, maybe especially. I work in law enforcement and I've known police officers that have gotten into big trouble for what they'd written on their FB pages. You have a defense attorney looking on their FB page and see comments like "went to scumbags hearing today, he needs to fry". Not good job development!

Everybody needs to be sure their FB account is locked from public.
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Old 01-17-2013, 08:41 AM   #39
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Hi everyone. Thanks for all of the responses. I did want to clarify my comments about going to "another" parent as opposed to "the" parent.

"Tommy" lives across the street. He's a scrawny, nerdy kid who's been bullied his whole life. When I was looking at "Bobby's" page, I read an unkind comment that Bobby made about Tommy. It wasn't earth shattering, but I thought Tommy's mom might want to know - given the history - and I'd appreciate someone telling me if it was about my son. I wasn't going to contact Bobby's parents.

Anyway, I've decided to let it go.

And I'm glad to know that I'm not out of line "reading" the kids public posts.
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Old 01-17-2013, 09:02 AM   #40
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don't be stressed - Facebook may not even be around In 10 years

Remember MySpace
The kids around here are fine on Face book because they have caught on to parents, family members and the parents of their friends watching them. Now they have moved on to Twitter and Instagram. If you want to see the trash talk go there. You wont find much on face book anymore.

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I honestly can't believe how naive some parents are. Teens are the most unpredictable creatures on earth, with all those hormones and choices they have to make. I've heard so many times people talk about how they KNOW their teen...I say you know what your teen wants you to know.
Exactly! I know of kids who have these accounts who are not even allowed online because of their behavior yet they post from friends phones or ipods and such. Their parents have no clue. They think they are raising angels.
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Old 01-17-2013, 09:55 AM   #41
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I heard a discussion on the radio the other day about internet privacy. The woman being interviewed (Lori Andrews) is a lawyer that wrote a book called "I know who you are and I saw what you did". I placed the book on hold at our library and I'm waiting for it to come it. Some of the discussions were quite frightening. One was that there are companies out there that have records going back 7 years so even if they clean up their social media page, things that they posted when they were 15 could come back to haunt them when they're 22 and looking for a job.

My girls are older(26 and 23) but when they first started with Myspace I told them that anything that they post online is the same as placing it on a billboard along I294 right by O'Hare Airport. They shouldn't be embarrassed or mad if the people driving by read it.
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Old 01-17-2013, 10:53 AM   #42
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wdwmom0f3 View Post
Exactly! I know of kids who have these accounts who are not even allowed online because of their behavior yet they post from friends phones or ipods and such. Their parents have no clue. They think they are raising angels.
I have a friend like this too. Her DD would never do anything like that. Facebook accounts are completely banned but she has no idea about instagram. Well one day my DD came home and said that her friend made her a Youtube channel? What???? Show me now please! So she did. The minute she started getting people she didn't know on it, it was deleted by both of us. Her friend on the other hand was posting pictures, videos, etc. with identifying information (school uniform with emblem, etc.) easy enough to find. I told her mother. She was confused but still insisted it was okay because it wasn't facebook.
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Old 01-17-2013, 10:55 AM   #43
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I heard a discussion on the radio the other day about internet privacy. The woman being interviewed (Lori Andrews) is a lawyer that wrote a book called "I know who you are and I saw what you did". I placed the book on hold at our library and I'm waiting for it to come it. Some of the discussions were quite frightening. One was that there are companies out there that have records going back 7 years so even if they clean up their social media page, things that they posted when they were 15 could come back to haunt them when they're 22 and looking for a job.

My girls are older(26 and 23) but when they first started with Myspace I told them that anything that they post online is the same as placing it on a billboard along I294 right by O'Hare Airport. They shouldn't be embarrassed or mad if the people driving by read it.
I did a whole bit for my GS troop on internet privacy. The girls were shocked that their history could be pulled up years later, even if they deleted it. The whole idea of server history or someone copying/pasting their photos and posts was completely foreign to them. Opened their eyes a bit. Hopefully at least one of them paid attention.
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Old 01-17-2013, 12:42 PM   #44
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Originally Posted by Eeyore'sthebest
I did a whole bit for my GS troop on internet privacy. The girls were shocked that their history could be pulled up years later, even if they deleted it. The whole idea of server history or someone copying/pasting their photos and posts was completely foreign to them. Opened their eyes a bit. Hopefully at least one of them paid attention.
Haven't used my space in years I wonder what will be here in 13 years social media wise
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Old 01-17-2013, 03:58 PM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scrappy_Tink View Post
I found an email to my son, when he was 11, from a little girl he knew...she was writing about how she'd been communicating with a 30 year old man that had contacted her. I told my son that he needed to tell her that I read the email and tell her dad, or I'd tell her dad (who I knew). He later called me to thank me.
Thank God you did. You may have saved that child's life.
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I just realized my ticker is wrong!! We leave July 29th!!
numerous trips in college and one together in 1990 August 2008 and August 2009: Polynesian. August 2012: Beach Club We're going to the Yacht Club in 2014!!
(Thanks, Disney Destinations, for your past generosity. And to the Beach Club staff for all their assistance in our 2012 medical crisis.)
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