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Old 12-28-2012, 01:45 PM   #1
MissManda
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To go solo or not to go solo...that is the question

Sorry if this is really long... I have a lot of ideas running through my head right now. Also, wasn't sure which board this should go under but it seems to fit here....

I've decided that my New Years Resolution is to lose about 50lbs (that will put me at my ideal weight). Since that's a lofty goal and not easily reached (since I have the worlds largest sweet tooth and like to eat), I decided that I want to reward myself with a trip to WDW. Obviously, I know that it will take a while to lose the weight (which just gives me time to save money). During this time though, I'm trying to decide now if I should go on this trip solo or not (since this plays a big part in how much I have to save).

I've been to WDW three times. The first two times were with my DH. The third and most recent trip we took our niece and nephews (the oldest of which lives with us and is pretty much our kid).

I've enjoyed all three trips, but even with just DH and I, I feel like our plans become more centered around what he wants to do. A great example is eating. He's so picky when it comes to food that if is not basic food he won't even try it (he loves Yachtsman Steakhouse and 50's Primetime Cafe but won't even try Yak and Yeti). I feel like I'm missing out on really great food and experiences because he's so stubborn about what he eats. Also, he doesn't know what it means to relax. His style is pretty much be there at rope drop and don't leave until the park closes. I would prefer to have some relaxation time on my 'vacation'. I like to lay around the pool or go to the spa and really relax. I also like to take my time shopping without being rushed out of stores. Its really frustrating for me because I do almost all the planning but then I let what others want to do run over top of my plans. (I'm just way to much of a people pleaser even when its at my own expense).

At first a solo trip sounds perfect. I can reward myself for hard work in losing weight (and I will lose the weight!!). I can go on this trip and finally do what I want to do, eat what I want to eat, and do everything at my own pace. I would also have more freedom on which time of year to go and where to stay.

But....then I get to thinking... my DH loves Disney so much. I know it would make him sad if I went without him (even though he does support my solo trip idea). Also, I think that I would miss not having someone to talk too. Especially while dining. I like to have company and someone to chat with about the events of the day. I worry that I would feel guilty going by myself.

So, then I got to thinking that it should be a family trip with DH and our nephew (who lives with us). But then it doesn't really feel like much of a reward for me, does it? If I spring for a famly trip, I would make it clear that part of this trip is for me only. If he wants to go from sun up to sun down at the parks that is fine. But he might have to do it without me. If I want to spend time at the pool then that is what I'm giong to do. Also, he would have to be willing to either try new places to eat (he might find out that he likes it) or he would have to eat without me some days because I am going to try new places. (I could also tell him the only way he gets to go is if he also loses weight and see how motivated he is!!!)

I'm open to any thoughts or opinions...what would you do in this situation? Solo? Family trip (with the understanding that this is my trip and my itinerary...and not give in like usual?). For solo travelers that leave people home that love WDW as much as you, how do you not feel a little guilty for going without them?
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Old 12-28-2012, 08:41 PM   #2
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I would either go solo, or make it very clear that if you go as a family you'll be taking time away to do your own thing. Would it be possible for you to combine the two, and travel there a few days early and have your own time before they join you? It seems like a lot of people who go solo worry about dining alone, so if you went alone you could use your dining time to call home and catch up on each other's days, that way you'd have your solo time but still be in touch regularly and not feel so isolated.

Good luck on your weight loss!!
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Old 12-29-2012, 04:16 PM   #3
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I'm going solo for the first time, without the kids and DH. I want to do things they won't let me do, like sing along with the songs, pose with characters, etc. My kids get this and are happy that I'm going, DH is a little nervous being home with the pack. I am also in the midst of losing weight and getting healthy. This is the first time that I don't have to worry about anyone but myself, and if that is selfish, so be it!
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Old 12-31-2012, 01:15 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mouselike-harrier View Post
I'm going solo for the first time, without the kids and DH. I want to do things they won't let me do, like sing along with the songs, pose with characters, etc. This is the first time that I don't have to worry about anyone but myself, and if that is selfish, so be it!
Me too! I took the kids in Nov., will be taking DH in June, but am going in a couple of days by myself, to do whatever it strikes me to do whenever it strikes.

I'd say either go solo, or combine a part solo/part family trip.
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Old 12-31-2012, 12:27 PM   #5
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Ok...being new to this.Last years resoulition was also to loose weight ( that didn't work completely out.just alittle.work in progress)..I am a part time dad divorced.My son is getting up in age .So my resoultion was to start spending more time to myself.Work,Family.Sons activites....I got flooded out with sandy.Plans had to push back a month.After reading these strains on this board.I am going to make plains and hit it myself...SOLO...Feb...I can do what I please,my pace slow or fast...WHY NOT!!!!!
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Old 01-01-2013, 03:21 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Irishman View Post
Ok...being new to this.Last years resoulition was also to loose weight ( that didn't work completely out.just alittle.work in progress)..I am a part time dad divorced.My son is getting up in age .So my resoultion was to start spending more time to myself.Work,Family.Sons activites....I got flooded out with sandy.Plans had to push back a month.After reading these strains on this board.I am going to make plains and hit it myself...SOLO...Feb...I can do what I please,my pace slow or fast...WHY NOT!!!!!
Good for you! Bet you'll have a great time!
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Old 01-01-2013, 04:20 AM   #7
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I think it will be difficult to take a family trip and expect it to go much differently than it normally has -- with others' preferences trumping your own. You already know how they behave at WDW, do you think they will be able to modify that without frustration for any of you? Only you can answer that.

Sounds like you might really enjoy a solo trip for the reasons you mention. As for meals, the CMs sometimes like to chat, or you can take a book, make notes for your journal, write postcards, text loved ones, go thru photos on your camera. There are plenty of things to do while you wait. I personally wouldn't be talking on the phone. Restaurants were either very noisy, or others were seated far too close and I didn't want them to have to listen to me yakking on the phone during their meal.

Guilt? You do a lot for your family. It's ok to take a few days for yourself. No need to feel guilty.

Best wishes on reaching your goal, however you decide to celebrate!
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Old 01-01-2013, 06:18 AM   #8
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Celebrate alone. The freedom is awesome. If you happen to go at the same time as someone on this thread and they have ressies say at "California Grill", then meet up and enjoy eating at a place you want with someone who also wants to eat there. If not, just go it alone and do what you want to do. Disney now has free wifi in most locations. Throw a Kindle in your backpack and have a ball. . .
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Old 01-02-2013, 09:07 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DakotaRose View Post
I think it will be difficult to take a family trip and expect it to go much differently than it normally has -- with others' preferences trumping your own. You already know how they behave at WDW, do you think they will be able to modify that without frustration for any of you? Only you can answer that.

Sounds like you might really enjoy a solo trip for the reasons you mention. As for meals, the CMs sometimes like to chat, or you can take a book, make notes for your journal, write postcards, text loved ones, go thru photos on your camera. There are plenty of things to do while you wait. I personally wouldn't be talking on the phone. Restaurants were either very noisy, or others were seated far too close and I didn't want them to have to listen to me yakking on the phone during their meal.

Guilt? You do a lot for your family. It's ok to take a few days for yourself. No need to feel guilty.

Best wishes on reaching your goal, however you decide to celebrate!
Yes I agree with this. It's easy to tell someone how you want to spend your vacation but I think most times people forget and just get into their own bubble. I say go alone! You'll have such a good time.
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Old 01-03-2013, 07:46 AM   #10
MissManda
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Thanks for the input. After giving it more consideration, I think that a solo trip is what my weight loss reward should be! There will be other times for family trips but if I do the work to lose the weight, I deserve to reward myself. Now, I just need to get those pounds off!
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Old 01-03-2013, 12:21 PM   #11
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Visit the WISH boards here, and plan your solo trip around one of the many races at Disney!
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Old 01-03-2013, 01:59 PM   #12
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i may be wrong - but aren't there always some type of main stream type choices on many of the table service establishments? you can download the menus and decide on some compromises. definitely go to his fave restaurants but also pick a couple that you would like - there's gotta be some that will have food he can tolerate.

it may not be perfect - you may get your way less than 50% of the time but for me, if it's 40-60 ratio, that's a lot better than if it were 10-90 favouring his way.

are you able to plan a week where there are at least 2 days that's more relaxed?

my husband and i are both adventurous with food. but he's much more relaxed while i'm more the early-bird gets the worm type of person. so i've planned a week where we have a couple of days just to relax. and in between some of the more busier days, there are a couple of hours carved out as down-time.

i've showned him my ideas and he seems to be very happy about it.

whichever way you decide, good luck!
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Old 01-03-2013, 03:24 PM   #13
WildernessMickey
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Try Solo

I just went on my first solo trip last month. I was nervous about it, but it went well. I got to do the things my family usually doesn't care about.

I got to sit on the street curb and watch a parade, eat a dole whip for lunch, watch the glass blower in the back of the crystal shop on Main Street USA (didn't even know it was back there since I am always rushed through the shops!), ride the carousel, walk through the tiger trail in AK, go to Innoventions, watch the whole show by Off Kilter, get a glass of champagne in France, and sleep in! It was fun, and I did many more "slower" things that we usually skip over. Shopping time was never hurried, and I skipped a lot of the big rides we usually go on so that I could go to a few shows. I realized I hadn't driven the cars at Tomorrow Land in over 10 years. The only time I wished I wasn't alone was during meals, but I ate mostly counter service and it wasn't too bad.

I have another solo trip planned next fall. So I say try it, you'll like it!
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Old 01-03-2013, 10:16 PM   #14
RN2disney
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Going on my first solo trip on Monday!! I have never vacationed without my kids.

I am going to enjoy all the things that I never get to do!!
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Old 01-04-2013, 02:27 PM   #15
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aloha,
Go for it. I was a little scare going solo at first, but I had a great time. I did 3 days soloing at WDW. I had dinner at Blue Zoo and Raglan Road at the bar and had a great time. Had lunch at Les Chefs de France and dinner at Tuto Italia. It was a terrific. Never felt awkward at all.
After WDW I went on 7 day solo cruise on the Fantasy. Wow. Never felt alone at all. Even though I was at a 4 top table all by myself at the MDRs never felt alone. I got treated royally by all the servers.
At Palo's and Remy I had dinner and brunch by myself twice at each and never felt awkward at all. I was treated even better from what I saw with the interaction with other guest.
I could eat several times at these restaurant because it was just me.
Throughout the cruise I never felt lonely. The cast members and the people on the cruise always made feel that I was not alone.
You can come and go as you please I was always doing things.
I learned a lot about myself on this trip.

aloha,
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