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Old 12-08-2012, 02:44 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by princesspumpkin View Post
On the same note, I was watching the show where the bridesmaids were picking their gowns and one of them was quite modest due to religious beliefs. Since so many dresses are strapless these days, all of the gowns that the bride liked for her bridesmaids were either strapless or showed a lot of shoulders and some cleavage. Said bridesmaid was very uncomfortable in the dresses, so the bride offered to have her wear a different dress and just be a "hostess". Bridesmaid said that would be fine, but then bride started crying, feeling that her friend could put aside her beliefs for this one day.

Hmmmmm, what do y'all think about that?
I saw that one and I thought it was really terrible the way they badgered that poor woman. The entire bridal party knew about her strict religious beliefs before they ever got there and yet they insisted on putting her into dress after inappropriate dress. In the end, she capitulated. I dont' understand why the bride couldn't have made an exception for her. All she would have needed to do was allow the woman to wear some kind of jacket and let her wear a more modest hemline. Would that have been so difficult, rather than demanding her friend compromise her religious beliefs? I think if Bridezilla was going to be so inflexible, she shouldn't have asked that particular friend to be a bridesmaid.
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Old 12-08-2012, 04:13 PM   #17
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When I was in bridal and dealt with the huge gaggle of women (and sometimes men too) with the bride, most of the time it wasn't that the bride wanted their opinions. Nope. In their minds, bridal gown shopping was a social activity, a spectator sport. It was free entertainment.

In fact, people often told us that. "We're here for the show." Or, "We were going to go to the movies, but this is free."

We regularly had to deal with bridal groups who brought in food and drink. It was like they were going to the theater to see a movie and since we didn't have a concession stand, they were bringing their own. We once had to kick out an entire bridal group because they were treating the shopping experience as a tailgate, complete with coolers of beer and sub sandwiches. This mentality did not exist at the beginning of my time as a bridal consultant -- the attitude changed over time.

We ended up having to put a large sign near the door prohibiting food and drinks because we had so many problems with ruined garments due to people spilling drinks or touching expensive gowns with hands that were greasy with McDonald's burgers. (And keep in mind, the salon was not a David's Bridal or JCPenney Outlet. It was a high end salon. And looked like a high end salon. No way would I have ever though anyone would look at this mansion with crystal chandeliers, antique furniture and appointments and thought, "THAT is just the kind of place to bring my brewskis and sausage sub!")
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Old 12-08-2012, 04:19 PM   #18
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I watch Say Yes To The Dress and wonder what the family and friends, that are asked to accompany the future bride during her dress shopping, are really supposed to say. The bride supposedly brings them so that THEY can offer their opinions on how the gown looks. But when they state that they don't particularly care for the dress in her, they are vilified for not supporting her.

Now I know that there are some people that are aren't very tactful with their opinions, but are they really supposed to just smile, nod and say "Oh, that looks great on you. Get it!"?

On the same note, I was watching the show where the bridesmaids were picking their gowns and one of them was quite modest due to religious beliefs. Since so many dresses are strapless these days, all of the gowns that the bride liked for her bridesmaids were either strapless or showed a lot of shoulders and some cleavage. Said bridesmaid was very uncomfortable in the dresses, so the bride offered to have her wear a different dress and just be a "hostess". Bridesmaid said that would be fine, but then bride started crying, feeling that her friend could put aside her beliefs for this one day.

Hmmmmm, what do y'all think about that?
I think its all made up for TV drama. However on the off chance that this is real. I can't imagine the bridesmaid didn't discuss this with the bride beforehand. That doesn't excuse a bride for expecting her bridesmaid to set aside her religious beliefs, or for downgrading her to "hostess" over a dress. However, it doesn't excuse the bridesmaid for not setting the rules and discussing what she will or will not wear before picking out the dress day either. I didn't see the show, but I assume all this came to light in front of the cameras, and I can see that being very convenient
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Old 12-08-2012, 04:30 PM   #19
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I took one friend wedding dress shopping to try different styles....long sleeve, short sleeve, neckline style etc.

Once I decided that I wanted a short sleeved sweetheart neckline, I took my mother and bought the 3rd dress I tried on. I knew my mother owuld be brutally honest if something didn't look good and let's face it...if the wedding dress truly didn't look good I wouldn't want it recorded in pictures for all eternity.

Honestly I have seen some brides wearing dresses they had no business wearing and I know for sure that 10 years form now they will be looking at their wedding photos going "Why didn't anybody say something????".
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Old 12-08-2012, 04:51 PM   #20
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I didn't get to go wedding dress shopping. No store would serve me so I didn't get that experience. With my dd it was only her and I went. She looked so beautiful in everything. She tried one dress on and she looks amazing however because it was a last day sale on samples they didn't have it in her size. We went to another sale and she found another dress that she also looked amazing in. To this day looking at her photos she is beautiful. None of her bridesmaids wanted to go with us and I think only one bridesmaid went bridesmaid shopping as well.
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Old 12-08-2012, 04:55 PM   #21
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I didn't get to go wedding dress shopping. No store would serve me so I didn't get that experience.
Why would no store serve you??
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Old 12-08-2012, 05:06 PM   #22
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Opinions from my mother and maid of honor? Yes, because I know them and trust them. Opinion from the store's employees? No. While trying on my favorite dress that I was geared toward buying, an employee told me that she didn't like the dress on me because it clashed with my tattoo. Her opinion was not asked for, she just gave it... We were all kind of stunned. I'm aware of how my tattoos will affect the appearance of clothes... I don't feel it was her place to interject something like that. My mom was so disenchanted with the store she offered to make my wedding dress. She did and it was special, and gorgeous! (Even with my tattoos! :D)
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Old 12-08-2012, 05:06 PM   #23
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My mom came with me for my first dress and my best friend who was also my maid of honor came with me for my second dress. I was the only one with her when she bought her dress. When it's time for my daughter to dress shop, she's said she wants it to be just the two of us. We'll see. I'm old fashioned and think the dress should be a surprise for the wedding day. These days too with camera phones, etc. who's to say someone won't share the dress with one person and then before you know it, everyone has seen it.
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Old 12-08-2012, 05:18 PM   #24
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It was in the mid 70"s. I was 18 when I got married. I was 4'9" tall and weighted 85 lbs soaking wet. I had long hair that I used to put in 2 pigtails or ponytails. My older (10 yrs older) sister and my Mum went to look for dresses. Everytime we went into a store to look we were stopped at the front of the store and asked who was looking for a dress. As soon as we said it was for me they told me to leave the store. Hmmm Pretty Woman story????LOL I think they thought I was really young and they wouldn't participate in marrying someone so young. They never did ask how old I was or that I had my parents permission. I really miss that I never got that experience.
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Old 12-08-2012, 05:30 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by tigercat View Post
It was in the mid 70"s. I was 18 when I got married. I was 4'9" tall and weighted 85 lbs soaking wet. I had long hair that I used to put in 2 pigtails or ponytails. My older (10 yrs older) sister and my Mum went to look for dresses. Everytime we went into a store to look we were stopped at the front of the store and asked who was looking for a dress. As soon as we said it was for me they told me to leave the store. Hmmm Pretty Woman story????LOL I think they thought I was really young and they wouldn't participate in marrying someone so young. They never did ask how old I was or that I had my parents permission. I really miss that I never got that experience.
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Wow, I was 18 when I married as well. Actually a month before my 19th birthday. (36 years now) Also in the 70's. I didn't experience anything like that. I was about 110 lbs at the time (Lord..do I miss those days, lol!) In any case, I never experienced anything like that. It wasn't that unusual for people to marry in their early twenties back then.
You must have looked VERY young.
I went with my mom, cousin (maid of honor) and my 8 year old sister!
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Old 12-08-2012, 06:01 PM   #26
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I saw that one and I thought it was really terrible the way they badgered that poor woman. The entire bridal party knew about her strict religious beliefs before they ever got there and yet they insisted on putting her into dress after inappropriate dress. In the end, she capitulated. I dont' understand why the bride couldn't have made an exception for her. All she would have needed to do was allow the woman to wear some kind of jacket and let her wear a more modest hemline. Would that have been so difficult, rather than demanding her friend compromise her religious beliefs? I think if Bridezilla was going to be so inflexible, she shouldn't have asked that particular friend to be a bridesmaid.
I am all for religious beliefs, but if it didn't match up with what I wanted for my wedding, then I would have to tell her that she had a choice to make. Why does one person have to dictate what the others wear and why should one's religious beliefs dictate what a bride wants in her wedding look.

Weddings are to expensive and hopefully and one time event. The bride gets to choose, period.
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Old 12-08-2012, 06:27 PM   #27
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I think its all made up for TV drama. However on the off chance that this is real. I can't imagine the bridesmaid didn't discuss this with the bride beforehand. That doesn't excuse a bride for expecting her bridesmaid to set aside her religious beliefs, or for downgrading her to "hostess" over a dress. However, it doesn't excuse the bridesmaid for not setting the rules and discussing what she will or will not wear before picking out the dress day either. I didn't see the show, but I assume all this came to light in front of the cameras, and I can see that being very convenient
Yep. Reality show = scripted, coached, throw as much drama in as possible.
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Old 12-08-2012, 06:43 PM   #28
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I am all for religious beliefs, but if it didn't match up with what I wanted for my wedding, then I would have to tell her that she had a choice to make. Why does one person have to dictate what the others wear and why should one's religious beliefs dictate what a bride wants in her wedding look.

Weddings are to expensive and hopefully and one time event. The bride gets to choose, period.


Absolutely, it's the bride's choice. But if the bride is gonna choose someone who has strict religious beliefs, dont' you think it would have been a good idea to discuss it before the shopping trip? The bride wanted the friend in the wedding. Friend wanted to wear something more modest than the strapless dressed clear up to her ying yang. I think the bride should have worked all that out prior to the trip, so as not to cause conflict and embarrassment. I didn't see the friend *demanding* to have her way. She just advocated for herself and tried to get the bride to decide what she was willing to do. When the friend decided to step down, the bride turned on the tears and next thing you know, friend decided she would go against her religious beliefs and get the dress she didn't want just for the sake of getting along. Now certainly, this may have been totally staged by the producers, but if it was real I think the bride dropped the ball. I can't imagine expecting a friend to just set aside her religious beliefs for my big day!
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Old 12-08-2012, 06:47 PM   #29
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Absolutely, it's the bride's choice. But if the bride is gonna choose someone who has strict religious beliefs, dont' you think it would have been a good idea to discuss it before the shopping trip? The bride wanted the friend in the wedding. Friend wanted to wear something more modest than the strapless dressed clear up to her ying yang. I think the bride should have worked all that out prior to the trip, so as not to cause conflict and embarrassment. I didn't see the friend *demanding* to have her way. She just advocated for herself and tried to get the bride to decide what she was willing to do. When the friend decided to step down, the bride turned on the tears and next thing you know, friend decided she would go against her religious beliefs and get the dress she didn't want just for the sake of getting along. Now certainly, this may have been totally staged by the producers, but if it was real I think the bride dropped the ball. I can't imagine expecting a friend to just set aside her religious beliefs for my big day!
Sure I would discuss it before hand, but this is TV and without the perceived drama, it just wouldn't work. Have you eve noticed how a mom or a bridesmaid can 100% hate the dress but as soon as the bride says "yes to the dress" they are all smiles and clapping and hugging, it isn't real.
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Old 12-08-2012, 07:03 PM   #30
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It was in the mid 70"s. I was 18 when I got married. I was 4'9" tall and weighted 85 lbs soaking wet. I had long hair that I used to put in 2 pigtails or ponytails. My older (10 yrs older) sister and my Mum went to look for dresses. Everytime we went into a store to look we were stopped at the front of the store and asked who was looking for a dress. As soon as we said it was for me they told me to leave the store. Hmmm Pretty Woman story????LOL I think they thought I was really young and they wouldn't participate in marrying someone so young. They never did ask how old I was or that I had my parents permission. I really miss that I never got that experience.
tigercat
OMG, that's awful! I'm so sorry that happened to you.

I'm 4'11" and pretty small, and I look pretty young. I was 25 when I got married (last year!) and I had no problem looking at dresses.
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