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Old 12-06-2012, 10:10 PM   #31
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Originally Posted by cornflake View Post
Well if your kid is riding the public bus, your kid is riding the public bus you know? I'd expect there to be people!
Well, the assumption about the child being alone save for the driver could theoretically work like this:

Mom puts kid on bus at Stop A after seeing the bus is empty. Dad is waiting for kid at very next stop. But, I'd still not be as comfortable in that situation as I would with the school bus scenario. Not that I'd actually choose such a mode of transport for my kid
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:10 PM   #32
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You know, that's a valid question and one that I've had concerns about before myself. The only thing was that it was my husband driving the bus. While he was still teaching in the classroom (in admin now), he drove a school bus for extra income.

I had concerns about his having to be alone on the bus with any student. In this day and age, you never know what you can be accused of - particularly when you are in authority and sometimes have to discipline students (in a world where more and more people have major issues with following any kind of rules).

I know someone personally who took up a student's cell phone that was going off in class (their school had a policy prohibiting phones at school). The parent called and wanted the phone back. When told they had to pay a fine per school board rules since this was the child's third time as stated in the student handbook, they hung up but called back literally 90 seconds later accusing the individual of molesting their child. I kid you not. Fortuately, that school has cameras everywhere, and the accusation didn't go anywhere.

My husband was very, very happy when he quit driving a bus. I don't guess this is exactly what the OP meant, but there are two sides to everything.

(No disrespect meant, OP.)
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:11 PM   #33
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Originally Posted by daileyad View Post
I don't usually consider myself an overprotective parent so I'm wondering others opinions. Would you be comfortable with your 12 1/2 year old daughter traveling about 4-5 minutes alone on a bus with a male bus driver?
5 minutes? That's all? Total????

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Not every man wants to molest a child. As a matter of fact, most of them don't.
ABSOLUTELY AGREE!!! You seem to be condemning before anything has even happened! Unless something has happened you haven't told us what are you basing your concerns on? The fact that he's male? Her father's male. Are you worried about leaving her with him for 5 minutes? Her Uncles? Grandfathers? Bus drivers don't have time and are well investigated prior to hiring so there's no reason to worry about your daughter
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:11 PM   #34
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It would depend on the driver. We seem to have a bumper crop that can't read english (at least not enough to actually be able to follow written directions) and speak it slightly better, so no I wouldn't be comfortable with it. If there was a problem, I don't feel confident he'd understand what she said.

Now if it were good ol' Mr. Sly (the BEST bus driver on earth), no problem. Even Mr. Muhammed would be okay, he was a little scary at first, but after you got used to him, he was ok.
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:12 PM   #35
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I would not have a problem with it at all unless my daughter came home and told me that she felt uncomfortable or uneasy around him. No way would I put my child on a bus if she felt uneasy about the bus driver. For her to feel that way, she would have to have a reason such as something he said or did that she felt was inappropriate.
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:13 PM   #36
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Originally Posted by horseshowmom View Post
You know, that's a valid question and one that I've had concerns about before myself. The only thing was that it was my husband driving the bus. While he was still teaching in the classroom (in admin now), he drove a school bus for extra income.

I had concerns about his having to be alone on the bus with any student. In this day and age, you never know what you can be accused of - particularly when you are in authority and sometimes have to discipline students (in a world where more and more people have major issues with following any kind of rules).

I know someone personally who took up a student's cell phone that was going off in class (the school had a policy prohibiting phones at school). The parent called and wanted the phone back. When told no, they hung up but called back literally 90 seconds later accusing the individual of molesting their child. I kid you not. Fortuately, that school has cameras everywhere, and the accusation didn't go anywhere.

My husband was very, very happy when he quit driving a bus. I don't guess this is exactly what the OP meant, but there are two sides to everything.

(No disrespect meant, OP.)
Interesting twist. Yeah, I as a grown man wouldn't want to be alone with a stranger's child (particularly a daughter) in this day & age any longer than I had to.
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:24 PM   #37
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I guess I would need more information. I know my daughter in 6th grade after riding the activity bus home once never wanted to ride it again (she had to a couple of times but hated it) because the driver gave her a hard time about having to come across town. I THINK he was joking but even if he was, it bugged DD. They have since started 2 busses (1 for the east side of town & 1 for the west side of town) but back then it was 1 bus that went everywhere right after school and it did take a LONG time to get everyone home. It would be possible she was the only one that had to ride it across town.

In her case, it had nothing to do with the fact that the driver was male but more the fact that she felt he didn't want to drive across town & would give her a hard time about it.

I have no idea if my boys are riding alone with a female driver as I have a 7th grader now who takes the activity bus every couple of weeks home.

Interesting spin with the adults but I completely understand it! I was a stay at home mom for a while & needed extra income...everyone said to babysit and there is no way I would babysit anyone! I mean my kids tend to get bumps & bruises on their own and manage to get injured -- it seems people automatically jump to the worst case scenerios for everything now.
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:31 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by Gumbo4x4 View Post
Well, the assumption about the child being alone save for the driver could theoretically work like this:

Mom puts kid on bus at Stop A after seeing the bus is empty. Dad is waiting for kid at very next stop. But, I'd still not be as comfortable in that situation as I would with the school bus scenario. Not that I'd actually choose such a mode of transport for my kid
It didn't even occur to me in that way (one parent putting the kid on the bus, etc.), as the kid in question was like 12. Just what you're used to.

This reminded me of another board on which people got all flipped out when a 12- or 13-year-old on a Real Housewives of NY show grabbed a cab by herself to go home because her mother wanted to go to another party and she didn't. The NYers on that board were like when ppl were freaked out. It was like hey, she was nice and gave her cab fare, could've just told her to take the bus or train.
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:45 PM   #39
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I dont know that I would be so comfortable with it. I guess everyone has different trust issues and I can honestly say there is a reason I have mine. I do the best I can to not put my DD or DS in a position where anything could happen but it is completly impossible to do. I have always done my best to educate them but at any time any stranger, friend or even family member could make an inappropraite move. No parent knows if their child would speak up and tell them if any thing has happened even if we ask them. This is a parents worse nightmare. A few months ago I saw on the news there was a busdriver, to be exact it was a van..... I cant remember if it was handicap, that passed up a students stop and drove to a dirt road he was just getting in the seat with the student. The girls father saw the driver pass their house acted quickly and apparently caught up to the van and got there prior to anything happening.
You never know who to trust and if you have a bad feeling or are just down right uncomfortable then you have the right to be, our children are precious.
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Old 12-06-2012, 10:59 PM   #40
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Originally Posted by crazydaisy00 View Post
I dont know that I would be so comfortable with it. I guess everyone has different trust issues and I can honestly say there is a reason I have mine. I do the best I can to not put my DD or DS in a position where anything could happen but it is completly impossible to do. I have always done my best to educate them but at any time any stranger, friend or even family member could make an inappropraite move. No parent knows if their child would speak up and tell them if any thing has happened even if we ask them. This is a parents worse nightmare. A few months ago I saw on the news there was a busdriver, to be exact it was a van..... I cant remember if it was handicap, that passed up a students stop and drove to a dirt road he was just getting in the seat with the student. The girls father saw the driver pass their house acted quickly and apparently caught up to the van and got there prior to anything happening.
You never know who to trust and if you have a bad feeling or are just down right uncomfortable then you have the right to be, our children are precious.

Well, yes, things can always happen, but we can't raise our children for the one in one million chance of something going wrong. I mean, I know someone who was partially paralyzed by falling down some stairs. Does that mean I won't let my kids go down stairs? That's just crazy.

I'm probably biased bc I was riding the school bus at 5, and public buses- alone- by 13 for sure (in the Bronx no less!) By definition, doesn't someone always have to be last off? And first on? If you were that family, what would you do? Drive your kid to the next stop or pick them up one stop early? That would make the whole point of taking the bus moot!
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Old 12-06-2012, 11:05 PM   #41
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Further to the point- there has been a lot in the press over the last few years about men in positions of authority abusing children- priests, for example. So should I go and sit with my daughter while she gives confession (we're Catholic) until she is 21 because "something might happen"? If that's your line of thinking, you may as well hole up in your house bc the possibilities are endless!
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Old 12-06-2012, 11:09 PM   #42
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Originally Posted by crazydaisy00 View Post
I dont know that I would be so comfortable with it. I guess everyone has different trust issues and I can honestly say there is a reason I have mine. I do the best I can to not put my DD or DS in a position where anything could happen but it is completly impossible to do. I have always done my best to educate them but at any time any stranger, friend or even family member could make an inappropraite move. No parent knows if their child would speak up and tell them if any thing has happened even if we ask them. This is a parents worse nightmare. A few months ago I saw on the news there was a busdriver, to be exact it was a van..... I cant remember if it was handicap, that passed up a students stop and drove to a dirt road he was just getting in the seat with the student. The girls father saw the driver pass their house acted quickly and apparently caught up to the van and got there prior to anything happening.
You never know who to trust and if you have a bad feeling or are just down right uncomfortable then you have the right to be, our children are precious.
I get anything can happen, but telling your children that at any time, anyone could make an inappropriate move seems like just asking for the kids to be constantly either in fear or about to make some accusation to me. In that grandpa pats someone on the butt like 'good job' and a kid who is primed that anyone can make an inappropriate move at any time thinks 'omg, grandma touched me inappropriately, this was it, what I've been warned about!'
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Old 12-06-2012, 11:09 PM   #43
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Okay, I guess I'm wrong in this thinking. When I was a teacher we were always trained to never put ourselves in the position of being alone with a student of either gender. What's happening is the bus stops at our stop but the driver refuses to let my daughter get off and cross the road (2 lane road with speed limit of 25). Then he takes her down another road where he drops off the only other children. After that it takes about 4-5 minutes before he gets back to our stop. The whole thing seems weird to me.
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Old 12-06-2012, 11:20 PM   #44
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daileyad
Okay, I guess I'm wrong in this thinking. When I was a teacher we were always trained to never put ourselves in the position of being alone with a student of either gender. What's happening is the bus stops at our stop but the driver refuses to let my daughter get off and cross the road (2 lane road with speed limit of 25). Then he takes her down another road where he drops off the only other children. After that it takes about 4-5 minutes before he gets back to our stop. The whole thing seems weird to me.
This could be a liability issue. Bus drivers are responsible for the kids safety . She doesn't make it home... It's his fault .

Any uneasiness about the route, call transportation, discuss it with them, they can explain why its the way it is.

Edit: read it wrong. That is weird. I'd just call and ask why she's unable to get off there. Maybe you can fix it where she can...
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Old 12-06-2012, 11:29 PM   #45
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Originally Posted by cornflake View Post
I get anything can happen, but telling your children that at any time, anyone could make an inappropriate move seems like just asking for the kids to be constantly either in fear or about to make some accusation to me. In that grandpa pats someone on the butt like 'good job' and a kid who is primed that anyone can make an inappropriate move at any time thinks 'omg, grandma touched me inappropriately, this was it, what I've been warned about!'
You can educate your children without them living in fear. I said "BUT" at any time any one could make ........ not that I scare them by telling them this.
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