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Old 12-08-2012, 06:14 AM   #46
wdwmom2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Handbag Lady View Post
I have a close-knit group of 15 women that would help me hide a body if I asked.
This made me laugh!!!

My ultimate BF is my hubby

I have one VERY BF, and we would be there for the other in a nano second!!! One of her Christmas gifts from me is a sign that says, "When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun."

I have many good friends.
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Old 12-08-2012, 10:04 AM   #47
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Around here, where we live? The "friendly" midwest? None. I have no one to really do things with or to rely on in an emergency. (Honestly, the latter scares me.) Lived here 20+ years and people have no interest in being friends with anyone outside their family or people they went to elementary school with. Yes, people have told me that point blank, to my face. Amazingly enough, they also have no problem asking me to do things FOR them, they just don't want me to do things WITH them.

Over the years, I've had friends with others who've moved here, but they've all moved away and at this point, I've given up. I get it, folks: if you aren't born here, you're invisible.

The friends I do have are people who live elsewhere, that I met via the internet or on vacations. I also have friends from other places we lived 20+ years ago. This summer, we actually took a vacation and went back to see some of them. It was so nice to spend time with people who give a crap about me. When I'm in a detached mood, I find it fascinating that I'm still friends with people I haven't seen in many years or that I meet people on vacation, make friends easily and quickly, and still have relationships with them years later while the people I see on a regular basis have no interest in being friends with me because they haven't known me since birth.

I'm tired of being lonely but I see no way to change it because I can't change other people. Being lonely is reason #7864 that I want to get outta here.
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Old 12-08-2012, 11:11 AM   #48
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I have a nice group of female friends. Some from HS or college, some from jobs, some from our kids at one time being friends. I couldn't function without them. My husband, kids, parents...they are all great. But I need variety, I can't help it.
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Old 12-08-2012, 05:30 PM   #49
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I would say 0.
I have work friends, and sometimes we do hang out outside of work, but since one of us moved away, our little group dynamic has changed. Could I call on them in the middle of the night? Probably, but would I WANT to? No, not really.
I do have old friends that thanks to FB, we have gotten together a few times, and have gone on a girls weekend (this was our 3rd year).
I'm ok with it; my family and work keep me busy and tired.
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Old 12-08-2012, 05:48 PM   #50
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Andtototoo
Around here, where we live? The "friendly" midwest? None. I have no one to really do things with or to rely on in an emergency. (Honestly, the latter scares me.) Lived here 20+ years and people have no interest in being friends with anyone outside their family or people they went to elementary school with. Yes, people have told me that point blank, to my face. Amazingly enough, they also have no problem asking me to do things FOR them, they just don't want me to do things WITH them.

Over the years, I've had friends with others who've moved here, but they've all moved away and at this point, I've given up. I get it, folks: if you aren't born here, you're invisible.

The friends I do have are people who live elsewhere, that I met via the internet or on vacations. I also have friends from other places we lived 20+ years ago. This summer, we actually took a vacation and went back to see some of them. It was so nice to spend time with people who give a crap about me. When I'm in a detached mood, I find it fascinating that I'm still friends with people I haven't seen in many years or that I meet people on vacation, make friends easily and quickly, and still have relationships with them years later while the people I see on a regular basis have no interest in being friends with me because they haven't known me since birth.

I'm tired of being lonely but I see no way to change it because I can't change other people. Being lonely is reason #7864 that I want to get outta here.
Hey, I didn't know you lived in the same place I do!
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Old 12-08-2012, 07:43 PM   #51
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Andtototoo View Post
Around here, where we live? The "friendly" midwest? None. I have no one to really do things with or to rely on in an emergency. (Honestly, the latter scares me.) Lived here 20+ years and people have no interest in being friends with anyone outside their family or people they went to elementary school with. Yes, people have told me that point blank, to my face. Amazingly enough, they also have no problem asking me to do things FOR them, they just don't want me to do things WITH them.

Over the years, I've had friends with others who've moved here, but they've all moved away and at this point, I've given up. I get it, folks: if you aren't born here, you're invisible.

The friends I do have are people who live elsewhere, that I met via the internet or on vacations. I also have friends from other places we lived 20+ years ago. This summer, we actually took a vacation and went back to see some of them. It was so nice to spend time with people who give a crap about me. When I'm in a detached mood, I find it fascinating that I'm still friends with people I haven't seen in many years or that I meet people on vacation, make friends easily and quickly, and still have relationships with them years later while the people I see on a regular basis have no interest in being friends with me because they haven't known me since birth.

I'm tired of being lonely but I see no way to change it because I can't change other people. Being lonely is reason #7864 that I want to get outta here.
First, you don't want to try to enter a group where everyone has known each other for 20, 30, 40 years. They have a bond you'll never be a part of and they have a language you'd never understand. People who MARRY one of them have a hard time with it.

You may learn that Mark is called Chris...you may even learn that heis also called Lou under certain circumstances...but never called Peter by anyone but Cathy...but you weren't there to learn it at the time and understand the whole thing. You might be confused when, after five years, you hear one say to another, "E" and everyone bursts out laughing...because it was a joke that developed thirty years ago, but nobody has brought it up in ten.

People who are lucky/unlucky enough to be friends with the same people they've known their whole lives really don't need more friends. They have all the friends they need and possibly all the friends they could handle.

However, most people are normal people and do not fit into this category. Most people have friends who come and go over the course of a lifetime. Join a group. Take a class. You will meet people.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:29 PM   #52
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I have a best friend but she lives states away and our relationship is really on a strain lately. I don't really have any friends and it upsets me. I'm very social and outgoing and people love talking to me, but I don't know why they never "stick." I miss having a group of friends.

ETA: I do have a wonderful family though!
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Old 12-08-2012, 10:59 PM   #53
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Yep, zero friends here too...

DH and I are really close and love doing things together. As for friends, neither of us have any, and we're ok with that. We relish our alone time, and really prefer that over any social event.


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Old 12-08-2012, 11:21 PM   #54
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DH is my very best friend. I also have a best friend that I either talk to or text every day. I also have two other "call in the middle of the night" friends that I talk to at least once a week.
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Old 12-08-2012, 11:46 PM   #55
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Maybe 1-4 even then, I see them rarely. Perhaps once a year for most of them, more often for the 1.
I have had a lot of acquaintances since I have had kids. Lots of homeschool moms, lots of activity related chatting types, but almost no one I have done anything with outside of these events.
I know it is my issue, but I just don't seem to meet any people that I truly click with. I also don't like the area I live in, and when we had kids, we lost huge groups of people who were still living the party life. Haven't really recovered.
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Old 12-09-2012, 12:12 AM   #56
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3 absolute best friends that I could call in the middle of the night and they'll be there. I have, and they were-and I've done the same for them. 2 of those ladies I've known since kindergarten, and the other since our first day of high school.

2 other gals that I'm extremely close to at work. We've gone on several work trips together, regularly get together socially, one is my son's Godmother. We all talk and text several times a week in addition to seeing each other at work.

Probably another 4-5 that are more "regular" friends. We are in a book club together, and 1 I was really close to in high school but we've drifted apart a bit while still staying in each other's lives.

It's funny. I'm incredibly introverted, painfully shy with horrible social anxiety. So I think once I feel comfortable with people I'm not letting them go!
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Old 12-09-2012, 09:07 AM   #57
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Let's see:
DFi is my best friend-- but I'm not going to count him.

2 really good girlfriends, 4 good guy friends. So that makes 6.

I have a handful of acquaintances. Honestly, I'm happy to just be with DFi as he truly is my best friend.
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